Here's a tip for any aspiring longpigs: nothing will buy you a one-way ticket to the oven faster than an apple in the mouth.
It's the perfect way of saying exactly what you are, and what you intend to become - a delicious longpork dinner.
This hog is particularly eager. In fact, he's gone so far as to write his meat grade on his side - a little cocky for sure, but I can't help but agree. Would you believe that this pig isn't even 230 lbs? I almost didn't, seeing the size of that gut or those fat rolls.
This pig desperately wants to be roasted in the oven, and based on that first photo I agree. It makes his best assets stand out, accentuates that juicy belly, and makes his hams look fat enough to keep me fed for a few days. Still, I'm not one to turn down a little extra meat.
As soon as he gets to my place I'm going to cage him for a while. In fact, I have one coming free in a few days - a little cramped, but as long as he's comfy in that position who cares? A week or so being forcefed my 100% efficient pigfeed and he'll definitely pack on a few pounds before it's time to slice off his oysters and graduate him to housepig status.
Still, I don't think that status will last for long. Sometimes you see a pig who's perfect for a big event like Halloween, Thanksgiving, or plain-old Thursday. This pig doesn't need much work, so I'd say he'll be around for a few days before he's shaved, stuffed, and roasted.
For this pig I'm going to go with a nice honey, apple, and whisky glaze. For the stuffing I'm going to go for longpork, fresh apples, berries, and honey. After all, you don't always need exotic stuffing ingredients, Longpork is already the most decadent ingredient there is, and the most important thing is always to find the right recipe for the right pig. I can't wait to dig into this succulent Porkboy. It's just a shame I can only cook him once.
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