lorelei

4teen | cw ?? | gw 39kg

[ivyzluv]

The more you eat, the worse you’ll feel. Eating never fixed anything

[angeliclorelei]

i hate being a size medium. i don’t like how it’s just in between the main two important sizes, small n large. ppl could call me thick or “thunder thighs” but honestly, it’s lowk debatable. i wanna have a body where if somebody called me fat, ppl would laugh n look at them like a clown. i just can’t stand being in that “ur not this but ur also not that” middle category.

[angeliclorelei]

i think i might actually have an eating disorder

[angeliclorelei]

school is starting in 10 days i NEED to lose 5kg by then

[chokingupleafs]

[angeliclorelei]

i can’t decide if i wanna be muscular and have a fat ass or be tiny and frail

[angeliclorelei]

my parents would be proud of me knowing the only drug i hit is st⭐️vation and cutt1ng <3

[angeliclorelei]

in another life, i’m a skinny emo boy with an extremely high metabolism

[angeliclorelei]

i know what i’m doing is wrong, i just can’t stop

[angeliclorelei]

sometimes i just wanna harm myself in front of the ppl who hurt me so they could feel guilty

[angeliclorelei]

ana is like a mother to me. every time i listen to her, i get what i want. every time i disobey, i get punished in one way or another.

i will not disobey mother ana

[angeliclorelei]

now that i think abt it, i’ve never had a good relationship with food.

when i was little, i would always brag about eating humongous portions but no one ever told me, “oh, you should slow down on your eating or start eating a bit less cuz ur gonna be sick” idk smth like that, but NO. i was praised for it because i was eating like most of my family who are obese. soon enough, eating those huge amounts stopped turning performative and was incorporated to my everyday life, making me obese.

i think i might actually have binge eating disorder because for abt 5 years now, the longest i’ve gone without binging is a week. A FUCKING WEEK. it just makes me grieve a bit knowing that i can never have a healthy relationship with food. i could never be those cool skinny/kinda thick but athletic girls who just eat whatever and don’t even think abt it. i try, i try SO hard to be like them, but i just can’t.

idk i just wanted to rant abt smth especially since i haven’t posted in a while. if u made it this far, thanks <3

[angeliclorelei]

the only thing that’s keeping me going is my ed

without it, i’m nothing

[angeliclorelei]

my fave th1n$p0

all pics r from pinterest

[angeliclorelei]

hii wanna be ana buddies?

omg yeah sure <3

[angeliclorelei]

ever since i was eight, i wanted to be skinny

i’m not giving up now

[4nalicia-again]

If u want to lose quickly, do a water f4st

If u want to cancel food noise, intermittent f4st

If u want to lose consistently, eat protein and fiber

If u want to rid bloating, drink a gal of water

If u want to lose for 3 days straight, lift weights

If u want to gain, keep doing what ur doing