Cocoa Cutie

Here for fun!

[bloggersfood]

No-Bake Cheesecake Jars

[neuroticmedblr-deactivated20190]

how to avoid education burnout

have 3 achievable goals a day: having a laundry list of things to do everyday is super unrealistic, and you just end up feeling bad about yourself because you didn’t accomplish your goals for the day.

leave your sundays open: i love sundays because they’re my day to chill out and catch up on school work that i wasn’t able to finish during the week.

recognize when you’re at your emotional limits: forcing yourself to get work done when you are unable to comprehend your study material does not benefit anyone.

learn how to say no: people will ask you for your time and it will stretch you to the limit, whether it be at your job, in your extracurriculars, or in your personal life. know when to step back and say no.

take care of yourself physically: take breaks, go for walks, shower regularly, get enough sleep, eat healthy, see your friends

celebrate your accomplishments: go out to eat with friends after a big exam, indulge in a night off after a busy week with some netflix and wine

make a study plan beforehand: it can be daunting to see how much work you need to put in to a class or task beforehand, but this allows you to spread your work evenly so you don’t become overwhelmed.

learn how to ask for help: it is very rare that people make it through school, whether it be high school or university or any graduate program, without needing the advice of others or just a kind soul to vent to. find that person.

never forget your hobbies: you will need things that keep you sane. if you love to play music, write, play volleyball, or cook, make you sure you don’t lose these things. they will become your escape when times get tough.

log off from time to time: it is exhausting to be constantly connected to social media and your email. just physically disconnecting from these for a night to take care of yourself can really help you clear your mind.

[gloriousveganbowls]

Yummy! 

✨

#Veganism #VeganFood #VeganRecipes #VeganLove #Vegan

[cherishedproperty]

D/s Hierarchy

We’ve all seen some version of this. But here’s how I write it, with the most important at the top:

submissive needs Dominant needs Dominant wants Dominant whims submissive wants

Submissives First In my mind, this is the only way it works. The submissive’s needs have to be managed first. Without those met, the submissive cannot let go and submit. When submissives have to devote energy to managing their needs and their Dominants’ needs and wants, it’s too much. Submissives have a tendency to put their Dominants first (and often, everyone else). So in the end, they suffer. They cannot do it all. And when they try, they wilt. Dominants must understand and work to fulfill their submissives’ needs. Or the whole hierarchy falls apart. 

But submissives have responsibilities here, too. First, they need to know what they need. Not want, but need. Second, they need to communicate about their needs—to help their Dominants check the gauges and rebalance when necessary. If you don’t truly know what you need, you can’t expect your partner to know. 

…But Dominants First, Too The other thing is that I don’t think submissives should see their needs as coming first. In an ideal relationship, submissives put faith in their Dominants to care for their needs, and they focus on their Dominants’ needs. If you can’t let go of putting your needs first, then you aren’t really giving up power. Communicate. Share your needs, and have meta discussions about them. Then let go. Trust. Lean in with your submission by putting your Dominant’s needs first. Focus on what they need. Let that guide you at all times. With submissive and Dominant both putting one another’s needs first, the dynamic flourishes. It deepens, and it takes you places you never knew existed. 

Why Whims Why do Dominants’ whims come before submissives’ wants? Why are they on there at all? At least for me, explicitly putting my Dominant’s whims above my wants is a reminder of what it means to be owned. And I need to feel it sometimes. I need to know that my Dominant has no need to justify decisions. I plug my ass in the middle of the workday when told. I drop what I’m doing to complete a task. I deny my orgasms at the last minute. That is what it means to be owned. No other reason required. I need to know that my needs come first, but I also need to know that my desires come last. Very, very last. This is what my slave heart needs—not just in theory, but I need to see it.  

For me, this is the fundamental structure of a D/s relationship. Different relationships may structure it differently. M/s will likely be different from DDlg, and the hierarchy may shift as two people build their dynamic. But the hierarchy makes a big impact on the dynamic. It’s not just the stated hierarchy; it’s the hierarchy reflected in your actions. How do your actions reflect your priorities? And does that create a dynamic where both partners can thrive?

[thethrivingchapter]

Non-cutesy self-care tips

Have you been eating well? If not, eat a piece of fruit or a handful of nuts. You need vitamins and protein.

You’re probably not drinking enough water.

When is the last time you showered? Take a cold shower to wake you up or a hot shower if you need to relax.

Do the laundry that’s been piling up. You’ve been wearing that sweatshirt for too long.

Take care of the dishes in the sink that have been there for three days and have started to stress you out.

Did you brush your teeth this morning? How about your hair?

Listen to the messages on your phone that have been there for days.

Go outside for at least a couple of minutes. You don’t even have to do anything; just sit down. Breathe in the fresh air and get some vitamin D.

Open your blinds. Your room is too dark and it’s probably making you tired.

Spend some time with your pet. Pet them, feed them, take them for a walk or clean out their litter box. Caring for them will make you feel useful and responsible and give you something to do.

The self-care posts that tell you to take a bath and eat chocolate and read a book are good but do what needs to be done first. Eating chocolate when you haven’t showered in four days and you can’t remember when the last time you changed your underwear was won’t make you feel better. It will probably make you feel worse. Clean yourself up; clean your surroundings up. Then take care of the little things. Tackle life one thing at a time.

[pleasurewhore-deactivated201802]

Long Distance Aftercare

I’ve seen questions about how to handle aftercare long distance many times here in Tumbletown. It’s taken a long time to figure out what works for us. It certainly presents some challenges still, but we’re comfortable with the progress we’ve made thus far and will continue to try new techniques. In the meantime I’m going to share what I’ve learned in hopes it will help others facing the same challenges.

Presence- The very first thing is presence. He does NOT get to disappear just because we’ve both cum. Playtime doesn’t end when the fucking does. We both agree that aftercare is not optional, not even when the playtime is ‘soft’.

Comfort objects- Personally I have a stuffy I cuddle after long distance play. Some people use one of his t-shirts, or a special blanket they cuddle under. Whatever it is, I highly recommend you use this object at other times too. Holding the object when you’re just chatting, and laughing together, helps to build good associations and make the object more comforting when you really need it.

Liquids- You need to have something to drink already nearby when you begin. In fact it’s become a rule of sorts that I fill my water bottle before calls with Daddy, because I’m not always in a place where I can do that sort of thing after. Juice is also highly recommended, a bit of sugar can help after a lengthy session.

Chocolate- I feel chocolate needs it’s own category, because in addition to the pick me up of the sugar content chocolate has it’s own magic. There are hundreds of naturally occurring chemicals in chocolate, some of which affect the release of neurotransmitters, including serotonin. While your body is going through sub-drop (the precipitous drop in feel-good hormones post play), you can dampen the effects with chocolate. Giving yourself another little boost on the way down can prevent spiraling from feeling on top of the world, to feeling incredibly sad.

Voice- Sometimes drop lasts longer than anticipated, or starts later than expected, even hours after play.  Daddy can’t always be there through all of those feelings. Having video and voice recordings of Daddy on hand can be really helpful. Be sure these recordings are not of a sexual nature, you want to hear a comforting voice and loving words to remind you that this isn’t all about being a sex object, but about his caring for you as a person.

[babygirl-1972]

Time to dispel a negative stereotype.

Today I saw an ask from an anon about seeing all the beautiful images on Tumblr and wondering if there was a submissive that wore jeans and had short hair. I find this sad. This anon feels that she isn’t a submissive because she doesn’t look like the girls we see on tumblr. It is time to REALIZE that those images are professionally generated, these are PAID models, and those images are FAKE! D/s isn’t a “LOOK”, it is who we are. D/s isn’t size 2, it is a frame of MIND. D/s isn’t high heels and leather. There isn’t a DRESS CODE. There isn’t a weight and height requirement.  D/s is WHO WE ARE at our core!

I am a submissive. I wear sandals, mud boots, leggings, and hoodies. My sundresses go to my knees or a little longer. My hair is a curly mess most times. I wear make up some days but not all the time. I am not and never will be a size 2, 4, 6, 8, 10 of 14. I don’t want to be. I like me. I am 5’3. My breasts are large and saggy. I don’t have much of an ass.  I have freckles and some skin damage on my face. I have a tummy and my legs are very muscular from years of sports. I have bad knees.  I am 47 and guess what AGING. OMG a submissive that doesn’t look like she is forever 20ish? And guess what? All of this isn’t what makes me a submissive. MY HEART and SOUL is what makes me a submissive. 

Dominants and submissives come from all walks of life. Christian, Jewish, Muslim, atheist. Blue and white collar jobs. Doctors, lawyers, teachers, bus drivers, tech fields, and stay at home moms. Cops, military, cooks, big business execs and MORE! You can’t TELL what makes someone a dominant or submissive by what they wear or what they do for work. The masculine firefighter who runs into burning buildings to save people from a fire could be the submissive.  The stay at home mom may be a submissive. The high power executive may be a submissive. The secretary at a school could be a Domme. These are just examples of how you cannot tell by what a person wears, or what a person does for work  if they are a Dom or a Submissive.

What we see is only the surface of the person. You cannot see their heart and soul. We need to stop looking at the highly professional, staged, photoshopped images as TRUTH. They are so far from reality. We need to realize that we do D/s the way it works for us. It will look like YOU. It will feel right.

This is how D/s looks in my life. I am married, a mom, a school bus driver, homeschool mom and business owner.  I love to cook, garden and serve my family and friends. I wear comfy clothes and live in my flannel jammie pants and long sleeve t’s and hoodies. I drive an SUV and rarely wear heels. I have little tendencies and am a masochist.   I will kneel for him with that special look or signal and give him every single piece of me. And yes, this submissive drives a John Deere.

I ask you if you like and reblog this very important message to PLEASE add to it. How you do D/s. It is important that we as a community spread the words that the stereotypes are negative and damaging to our self esteem. That the way YOU DO D/s is perfectly imperfect and that is PERFECT! Please SHARE!

MicheG May 11, 2019

[pleasurewhore-deactivated201802]

Structure and Self-Care for Unowned Submissives

I received a note recently asking me if I had any reference materials that focused on providing structure for a submissive who is currently without a Dominant. I didn’t, but I thought it was a good opportunity to write about it.

While I’ve never had a formal system, I have found in both in the time before I identified as a submissive, and in the times since, when I was without a Dom, that I naturally gravitate toward providing myself with a certain amount of structure. (To be clear I have always been a submissive, but I did not always have the words to identify as such.)

Creating structure for yourself in the absence of a Dom comes down to self care. You want to create routines for yourself that enforce predictability and healthy habits.  

Some examples of things you might consider establishing as ‘rules’:

Going to bed by no less than 7 hours before you have to wake. Being out of bed by a set time, even when you have nowhere to be. (say 10am?) Regular exercise several times a week. Reading a certain amount of pages per week. Getting a vegetable with every meal. Keep regular contact with friends and family members. (perhaps 1 call per week to 2-3 people) Do all the dishes before bed each day. Keep a chore list of things that need to be done each day, week, and month.

One you’ve decided the things you will be focusing on you may find it helpful to establish rewards for yourself. Some people, (like myself) who are organized by nature, may find reward just in having the routine, but for others there has to be incentive to motivate them.

You might consider taking out  some money from the bank in one dollar bills, and placing a dollar in a jar each time you successfully follow one of your own rules. At the end of each week or month you can use that money to buy yourself something special. If this doesn’t seem like something you’d abide by, money is tight, or you generally just buy what you want anyway, then you might consider orgasm control instead. Put yourself on denial, and give yourself a point for each task completed. When you manage to reach a set number of points you allow yourself an orgasm.

There are a lot of reward systems out there but the basics of giving yourself structure are in creating beneficial routines, and motivations for doing them. It doesn’t have to be formal charts if that seems like drudgery to you.

You can reward yourself within the system. It can be as simple as when you get to bed on time all week you allow yourself to sleep in on weekends.Or making yourself wait to have any snacks/treats for the day until your work/chores are done. There are endless possibilities really, what matters is that you feel motivated to continue taking proper care of yourself.

[instructor144]

Excellent, I’m always getting questions about this.

[bloggersfood]

Catalan Chickpeas and Spinach

[bloggersfood]

Italian Stuffed Shells with Meat and Cheese

[bloggersfood]

BLT Farro Salad Recipe (Farro, Bacon, Tomato, Arugula Salad)

[recovering-and-healing]

QUICK RESOURCE GUIDE FOR THE LGBT COMMUNITY

Some resources are good for everyone

Anxiety

• http://www.adaa.org/ • http://youth.anxietybc.com/ • http://www.helpguide.org/topics/anxiety.htm

Asexuality

• http://www.asexuality.org • http://www.asexualawarenessweek.com

Bisexuality

• http://www.biresource.net/bisexualyouth.shtml • http://www.bisexual.org • http://www.pflagcentralcoastchapter.net/uploads/BisexualityResourcePacket.pdf • http://queerdictionary.tumblr.com/

Coming Out

• http://www.thetrevorproject.org/section/YOU • http://www.hrc.org/resources/entry/resource-guide-to-coming-out • http://amplifyyourvoice.org/youthresource/youthresource-comingout • GLBT National Youth Talkline: 1-800-246-PRIDE (7743)

Depression

• http://www.helpguide.org/mental/depression_teen_teenagers.htm • http://kidshealth.org/teen/your_mind/mental_health/depression.html • http://us.reachout.com

Eating Disorders

• http://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org/find-help-support • http://www.helpguide.org/mental/eating_disorder_treatment.htm • http://www.eatingdisordersanonymous.org/

Family and Friends

• http://theparentsproject.com/home/ • http://community.pflag.org/ • https://www.genderspectrum.org/

Gay and Lesbian

• http://www.advocatesforyouth.org/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=730&Itemid=336 • http://www.advocatesforyouth.org/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=726&Itemid=516 • http://www.pflag.org/fileadmin/user_upload/Publications/Be_Yourself.pdf

Healthy Relationships

• http://www.scarleteen.com/article/relationships • http://www.breakthecycle.org/learn-about-dating-violence • http://www.thehotline.org/ • http://www.asexuality.org/home/relationship.html • https://rainn.org/ or call 1-800-656-HOPE

Homelessness

• http://www.ourtruecolors.org/ • http://fortytonone.org/ • http://nationalhomeless.org/ • http://www.aliforneycenter.org/

I Have A Crush

• http://us.reachout.com/facts/factsheet/do-i-want-a-relationship • http://us.reachout.com/facts/factsheet/maintaining-a-happy-relationship • http://gayteens.about.com/od/crushes/

In School

• http://www.stopbullying.gov/ • http://www.glsen.org/ • http://www.gsanetwork.org/ • http://www.campuspride.org/ • http://www.athleteally.org/

International

• http://suicide.org/international-suicide-hotlines.html • http://www.befrienders.org/ • http://iglhrc.org/ • http://ilga.org/ • http://www.iglyo.com/ • http://transactivists.org/ • http://www.oraminternational.org/ • https://www.nomorefearfoundation.org/faq/

Mental Health

• http://www.nami.org/ • http://www.reclaim-lgbtyouth.org/ • http://www.aglp.org

Out and Proud

• http://www.glbtnearme.org/ • http://www.outloudradio.org/ • http://www.transadvocate.com • http://www.genderfork.com

LGBTQ and Religion

• http://www.hrc.org/topics/religion-faith • http://www.pflag.org/fileadmin/user_upload/Publications/Faith_Families.pdf • http://www.transfaithonline.org/ • http://www.religionfacts.com/homosexuality/index.htm • http://www.religiousinstitute.org/lgbt-equality/

Christianity-specific

• http://believeoutloud.com/ • http://www.gaychristian.net/ • http://www.gaychurch.org/ • http://www.welcomingresources.org/

Islam-specific

• http://www.muslimalliance.org/ • http://www.imaan.org.uk/ • http://theinnercircle.org.za/ • http://mpvusa.org/ • http://www.well.com/user/queerjhd/

Judaism-specific

• http://www.keshetonline.org/ • http://www.nehirim.org/ • http://www.jqinternational.org/resources/jewish-lgbt-organizations/

Self-Injury

• http://www.helpguide.org/mental/self_injury.htm • http://www.siriusproject.org/alternatives.htm • http://everyoneisgay.com/self-harm/ • http://www.safe-alternatives.com

Sexual Health

• http://www.plannedparenthood.org/ • http://www.scarleteen.com/ • http://www.sexetc.org/ • http://www.aids.gov/ • http://youngwomenshealth.org/ • http://www.youngmenshealthsite.org/ • http://cdn0.genderedintelligence.co.uk/2012/11/17/17-14-04-GI-sexual-health-booklet.pdf • National Abortion Federation Hotline: [phone]

Suicide

• http://www.afsp.org/ • http://www.save.org/ • http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/ • http://www.befrienders.org/

Substance Abuse

• http://www.samhsa.gov/ • http://www.drugabuse.gov/ • http://www.ihra.net/what-is-harm-reduction

TRANS* AND GENDER  IDENTITY

Gender Identity

• http://genderqueerid.com/ • https://www.genderspectrum.org/ • http://www.thegenderbook.com/

Intersex

• http://inter-actyouth.tumblr.com/ • http://oiiinternational.com/ • http://www.apa.org/topics/intersx.html#whatdoes

Trans*

• http://transstudent.tumblr.com/ • http://www.advocatesforyouth.org/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=731&Itemid=177 • http://www.imatyfa.org/ • http://www.wpath.org/

PLEASE REBLOG

source: The Trevor Project

[flashdoggy]

Because traditional family holidays can be painful for many of us.

[submissive-seeking]

ARE YOU READY FOR A THREESOME (or any other third party, non-monogamy)? Here’s a helpful graphic to help you decide.

[instructor144]

I love flowcharts, and doesn’t a week go by where I don’t get at least one “my partner wants to have a threesome” Ask.

[theoriginalblackbarbie]

For example Frederick Douglas’ wife did so much for his ungrateful ass. She helped him get on his feet, gave him her last name, and supported him financially and took care of house and home. And in return was does this nigga do? He lets white abolitionists tear her down and treat her like a slave in HER HOUSE. Moved two bitches into HER HOUSE over a span of 20 years. Belittles her for being illiterate while using HER MONEY. Not even in death does she get the respect she deserves. His last wife is more recognized as being apart of his life than she was. Just trash. And y'all still normalize that shit as if it’s a black woman’s job to struggle. Fuck that.

[lovableshade]

Fuck Frederick Douglas.

That negro was a massive hypocrite. How the fuck you wanna abolish slavery and support women’s rights, then treat your own wife like shit?????????????????

[theoriginalblackbarbie]

^^^^ history left her out of his story too. Claiming his parents have him money to start up when it was her.

[aawifde-deactivated20181224]

Don’t forget MLK and Malcolm X

[theoriginalblackbarbie]

My heart broke a little but I’m not surprised. What did Malcolm do ?

[blackgirloutrage-deactivated201]

I don’t know about Malcolm X, but I know that Martin Luther King was in love with a white caferteria lady name Betty that he was seeing while he was attending college. The only reason why he married Coretta and not the cafeteria worker is because his dad frowned upon it. Not only that but his best friend Ralph Abernathy and Jackie Onassis exposed him for being a sex craved phony that loved cheating on Coretta. I guarantee that if black women from the civil rights era could talk now, our heads would explode. 

[ambelle]

I mean if we’re gonna spill tea

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3UG7YCgkXTo

Our community has always treated us like shit no matter what. Not to mention Miss Claudette Colvin who was the actually pioneer of the Civil Rights Movement. She was arrested for not giving up her seat on the bus 9 months before Rosa but she was a dark skinned single mother so she wasn’t good enough. 

[blackgirloutrage-deactivated201]

Let’s not forget Black Panther’s leader Eldridge Cleaver and his famous book “Soul On Ice” where he recounts how he practiced raping black women because he knew no one would care and when he “mastered his craft” he starting raping white women. Also let’s never forget that he said that there is no more love left between black women and men and that everytime he embraces a black woman, he embraces slavery. Y’all gon’ get this history lesson today!

[ambelle]

Wow… and somehow I’m not even surprised.

[theoriginalblackbarbie]

I knew all of that. Martin was constantly cheating with white prostitutes even a German exchange student while protesting civil right. Cleaver was the worst. Preying on and raping young black girls in the hood as practice for raping white women. Claudette is still referenced as “the other rosa parks” when the light bright brigade “NAACP” weren’t gonna let her share her story to begin with.

[angel-of-death-2015]

Let this post never die. Black women were NEVER respected back in the day, and we’re STILL getting disrespected every minute.

[raimagnolia]

Wow….

[futurewitchdoctor]

[reasons why I think most Black dudes r performative when it comes to being *proBlack* n only know how to mirror yt ally theater/chase yt validation. n nonBlack ppl better back the fuck off this post and start combatting the antiBlackness before they even think of comment.]

[kimreesesdaughter]

Just a reminder that Claudette Colvin didn’t get pregnant until 3 months after refusing her seat on the bus. She was a poor dark skinned girl. In her words “they wanted someone PEOPLE would sympathize with and I didn’t look like that.” Colorism AND Classism waaaay before Instagram 🙂

[walksoftlytay]

Bruh I learned all of this and more in my civil rights history class last semester. My professor actually got her doctorate in black women in the black power movement. Even though two black men from California started the radical group as we know it, black women did most of the work and kept the group afloat. By the 80s it was largely female led. Also, elderidge cleaver wrote an essay after getting out of prison where he recanted everything he said in soul on ice and this was largely due to the fact that women were running the bpp and told him he couldn’t join if he was to co tibie to perpetuate this rape nonsense.

Also also claudette Colvin wasn’t the only one who was forgotten during the Montgomery bus boycott. Do y'all know who Jo Ann Robinson is? Home girl was the backbone to the whole movement tbh. Yeah rosa (a trained activist btw) was the igniting flame and yes in her documents and Jo Ann’s Claudette was credited as the inspiration, but jo Ann really kept the movement running. She organized car pools for all the black folks in Montgomery. Y'all the Montgomery bus boycott lasted for a year! People still had to get to work and shit. Jo Ann was on it! Plus she had a whole committee that was pushing for regulation changes and the end of segregation in busing. And hell, Montgomery buses were damn near reliant on black commuters so they eventually had to give.

Plus my all time fave is the homie Ella baker. Home girl ensured the founding of sncc when fuckboy Mlk tried to make them the youth chapter of the sclc. SNCC is the group that made sit ins a popular form of protest during the early civil rights movement. They founding students had their first sit in in 1960. Ella baker was like these students need their own separate movement and the sclc ain’t it. Plus she was a true proponent of self determination which was clear in everything that sncc did.

Basically what I’m trying to say is black women been the backbone of society and they still are.

[veryfemmeandantifascist]

Let’s also talk about how Huey P Newton, the founder of the BPP ordered the severe beating of Regina Davis. Regina Davis was an administrator at a BP school and was literally jumped for reprimanding a male BP member. She was beaten so bad that she was in the hospital for a broken jaw and had to flee to LA for her own safety. Her attack was a deliberate message to all female BP because the men were getting  upset with the increasing power black women had in the party and wanted to put them in their place.

In 1974 Huey P Newton also shot and killed a 17 year old sex worker in Oakland named Kathleen Smith in the face for calling him “baby” and because she didn’t give him the “respect” he wanted (x) 

[veryfemmeandantifascist]

and who could forget good ol’ Harry Belafonte and how he treated Ertha Kitt way back when 

Ellen Holly was a super light skin soap opera actress who claimed to have a similar experience with Harry Belafonte before he married a white woman and called him out in her autobiography about his behavior towards black women

[andreseward]

THIS IS WHY WHEN PATRICIA ARQUETTE SAID WOMEN HAVE HAD TO TAKE A BACKSEAT TO OTHER GROUP´S PROGRESS SHE WAS RIGHT! 

BUT Y’ALL WERE SO UPSET WITH HER

[veryfemmeandantifascist]

That white woman ain’t got nothing to do with this. We’re talking about black women’s treatment here.

[hatingeverything]

How dare you bring Patricia Arquettes white feminist ass on a post about the treatment of Black Women

[feministories]

That was a much needed thread. Reminds me of the first time I discovered Tumblr and learned so much about feminism and women’s history. To add my 2 cents to this, I put the pictures of most of the ladies mentioned above (I couldn’t find a picture of Regina Davis, if you have one that’d be great), so that anyone discovering these wonderful women can put a face to their name. 

[veryfemmeandantifascist]

unfortunately there are no known or publicly available pictures of Regina Davis or Kathleen Smith

[veryfemmeandantifascist]

Keep this thread going and share the stories of how Black women have been degraded by black mens sexism 

Just to add some more, let’s not forget the importance of Shirley Chisholm. She was an unapologetic black feminist who fought for the rights of women and the poor in her community.  She was a founding member of both the Congressional Black Caucus and the Congressional Women’s Caucus. 

She was the first black women ever elected to the US congress and was the first woman and black american to ever run for the president of the US. Her campaign to be the democratic nominee was treated like a joke, and although she had the support of her loyal husband she received NO SUPPORT  from black male leaders. Her campaign went underfunded and the men of the black caucus rallied around white male candidates instead because they were pissed off that she was getting attention and wanted a black male candidate instead.

“They think I am trying to take power from them. The black man must step forward, but that doesn’t mean the black woman must step back.“(x)

[veryfemmeandantifascist]

Don’t let this thread die! Keep commenting and bringing to light the stories of black women. Just adding more about the black panthers, a lot of people don’t realize that black panther chapters spread across the world to unite black and dark skinned people. 

In 1972 Dennis Walker, a black aboriginal Australian cofounded the Australian Black Panther Party (ABPP).

As always black women made up the back bone of the movement, organizing, protesting, and working in the ABPP schools/medical centers. Marlene Cummins, one of the first black women leaders in the movement recently spoke about about the abuse she and other women endured. Marlene and Dennis dated for some time and she has admitted that he was verbally abusive, violent, and cheated on her with white women. She once saw him smash a broken bottle onto a women’s face, which eventually led to their breakup.

She also revealed that she was raped by two indigenous leaders at the time (one aboriginal and the other torres strait islander) which was recorded on tape.

“There were men who are immortalized in history as heroes. Some of them are and some of them aren’t. [Some of them] are not heroes. They were rapists and perpetrators.”

“There were no support systems and women’s refuges weren’t as prevalent as they were today. Women’s rights were not voiced…[So can you imagine] what it was like for young girls with no support networks in those days, when those things – rapes by uncles – were not spoken of. How can you deal with that?

“…Even if you did report a crime, you were questioned whether it happened to you because you contributed to it: you asked for it!”

I’ve see a lot of people leaving comments asking for more information/resources to look into these women. A bit a googling will bring you plenty of reliable resources.

Marlene has a documentary out which can be seen here for free (x). I would also suggest reading this books by black panther women (x), (x), (x), (x) and this book that actually details the work some black men such as Fred Hampton did to address misogyny in the movement. 

[blaquerenaissance]

Thank God for Black women. As Black men, we need to do better. We must respect our women’s role in the resistance and revere them for everything they have and continue to do.

[downfordatown85-blog]

I second @blaquerenaissance

[courtneycocoa]

Honestly @blaquerenaissance respect and reverence is nice but what we need is for Black men who do care about Black women to challenge the ones who don’t so that something like this thread never happens again. For every Black man who thought it was socially acceptable to treat Black women like dogs, I promise you there were at least 3 other Black men who stood by and did nothing, said nothing, or encouraged them. Respect and reverence from 25% of y'all isn’t going to do anything if the other 75% still think Black Women are toys that they can discard when we are no longer useful to them. And since we know that Black men as a whole don’t listen when Black women are talking, it’s up to Black men to speak up when they see something

[indomitablekushite]

I am so sick of coming on social media seeing some of these so-called negro conscious women who hate African men continue to use less than 10% of the populations as an excuse to make a blanket statement about all African men they act just like white women with their generalities we have enough to be fighting against that you should not be using your Consciousness to be fighting in the house. As long as you are not dating outside of your race don’t worry about other people period every one of these b****** probably don’t even have a man. I am just so thankful for the true conscious sisters who have no time for this petty feminists s*** they sent us in the sixties that these negro Christian girls are still falling for in 2018. This one sister in Hollywood years ago use the example of two or three men in Hollywood when she had a whole country to pick from but she chose a white man and the reason she did that is because of some high yellow n**** Harry Belafonte

[vanguardtotherevolution]

1. If you are tired of social media, delete your account. I swear no one will miss you.

2. I’m going to assume reading is not your strong suit because this post highlights the struggle Black women went through while simultaneously carrying the plight of Black liberation on their backs but somehow your remedial comprehension level gathered this as an assault against “African men”.

3. If calling out rapists, hypocrisy, and abusers is what divides the Black community, in your eyes, you’re a coward looking for an excuse to justify your refusal to hold men accountable who deserve to be held accountable. You read a post where Eldridge clever wrote a book about raping Black women for practice and your bitch ass response is… “ As long as they don’t date outside their race”. Again reading is not your gift because he literally says he started with Black girls because nobody cares about them but his goal was to rape white women. (To clarify*** rape does not = dating)But of course the other examples stated in this post of Black men chasing white women while abusing Black women who were on the front lines of revolution went right over your head.

4. Yes coward is the right word for you because anyone who reads about rape, abuse, and the worship of whiteness and has the nerve to type a dissertation how much this makes you mad at Black women??? Congratulations you have chosen the side of your oppressor. You choose to want to silence those who shed light on rapists and abusers in our history, so that these issues can be expunged from the Black community (news flash dumbass, this problem still exist,not just in the 60s as you mentioned). Rather your solution to keeping the Black community together is for Black women to be quiet and allow safe space for rapist to thrive. Coward.

5. Since when is it feminist to tell the truth?

6. Too many are comfortable ignoring the truth. The truth is our heroes had flaws. And those flaws is what is breaking up the Black community. Not Black women’s calls for accountability.

7. And my last point. You’re weak and aint cut out for this if truth makes you want to bury your head in the sand and fall in line with global white supremacy and choose to berate black women. Again, delete your account. Consider it a contribution to the struggle for Black liberation by removing yourself from the equation all together. You are a pimple in the path to progress and your hatred for Black women, Black history and the truth are clear signs of your ignorance that has no use to Black people. It only aids and affirms white supremacy which makes you an enemy to those seeking liberation.

[pallettownshawty]

Honestly this why I didnt support that Nat Turner movie or the guy who made it. You cant claim to want black rights if you plan screw over black women to get it.

[blacksoulonice]

the nonsense bein’ made in these posts is why i hate feminists.K

[carribean-dutch-girl]

These are all facts you brainless morron

[stayingwoke]

He hates feminists because of past facts?  Ok then.

[eaudrey35]

He hate blk feminism for pointing out facts abt these men that r suppose to b held n high asteem

[earthmother29-deactivated202304]

This post

[jwill526]

I am still reading this post. Damn

[theultimate90]

This thread! 🔥🔥🔥

[danipfhantom]

Here’s some evidence to that whole Elderidge Cleaver thing. This man was bold with his hatred for black women, and somehow this book is getting praised by critics for its “rawness”?

[tornadohed]

this last blurb? what a fucking piece of shit.

black women are constantly being belittled, abused, dehumanized and literally NOBODY gives a fuck.

i am so fucking disgusted and saddened.

[kvmes]

I feel so much disappointment, indignance and disgust after reading this. The suffering that these black women had to endure at the advantage of their men is absolutely shameful.

This is the truth we need to bring to the light. The reality of our history.

These men are perpetuated as heros, role models, proud victims. However this is the untold truth of these disgraceful predators and in some ways undeserving villains.

If anyhing stuck with me, it was when Shirley said, “The black man must step forward, but that doesn’t mean that the black woman should step back.”

I refuse to be a shadow to any man. I am a proud black woman and I will stand in my own light. I hope my sisters do the same.

[feministism]

[strengthins0lidarity]

Fun things they don’t teach you in sex ed.

[teaboot]

Talcum powder has asbestos in it. Has for years. Leave it be

[fithoneys]

LOL! ALL MY WOMEN NEED TO KNOW THIS! YOU ARE THE ONE AND THAT’S ALL YOU NEED TO KNOW!

[the-faculty]

The "Painful" Truth About Sub-Space

Ok we received an ask about someone who was having trouble reaching sub space. @spoiled-lil-kitten mentioned (in a different ask) that there is a chemical element to sub space. Being that I am the resident Sadist on staff, I have done a bit (read a lot) of reading on the subject and will try to give you a highlight reel of what I have learned.

***WARNING CONTAINS SCIENCE***

What is happening when sub space is reached by means of physical and or emotional PAIN is essentially an opioid high.

Yep, you read that right. A good scene is like mild morphine straight to the brain.

A recent study at U of M also concluded that the same is true for emotional pain. So for all you humiliation and verbal degradation lovers these tips are for you too.

Let me nerd that out for you…

There are four opioid receptors in our brain: mu-opioid (MOR), kappa-opioid (KOR), delta-opioid (DOR) and nociceptin(NOP).  Increasing these receptors or the molecules that bind to them will produce an opioid high. These effects are most commonly found in the ventral striatum, amygdala, midline thalamus, and periaqueductal gray regions of the brain.

Depending on what receptors you increase the analgesic effect will be greater or lesser.

The MORs are the ones that heroin and morphine act on.

DORs are the receptors that most of your antidepressants latch on to.

KORs I’ll be honest I don’t know much about KORs except that they cause dysphoria when activated and counter a lot of the effects of MORs

Now wasn’t that fun?

Ok so what?

Well, the ask was about not being able to hit sub space. Here’s why all that up there matters. There are things you can do that will activate those receptors so that you can be “primed” before a scene to enter sub space.

Here goes:

Cold exposure also increases “Heat Shock Inducible Factor”, which increases opioid receptors. Specifically, mu and delta opioid receptors, the same receptors that heroin and morphine work on. By increasing these receptors, our innate opioids are more likely to bind to  receptors and activate them. So when the flog hits and the brain says kill the pain there will be more receptors available to flood. Meaning… take a cold shower before a scene.

Get some rest… Sleep deprivation decreases mu and delta opioid receptor binding in the limbic system, which controls emotions to increase feelings of pleasure

Have a drink. Drinking alcohol induces opioid release in the nucleus accumbens and orbitofrontal cortex, areas of the brain implicated in reward valuation. Just A drink. If you over do it you will negate the effect.

Take magnesium. Studies show that magnesium amplifies the analgesic effect of low-dose morphine in conditions of sustained pain this will allow our natural opioids to be more effective.

Melatonin. Melatonin exerts its analgesic actions by increasing the release of beta-endorphins.

Hold your breath (or have someone hold it for you 😈) Chronic intermittent hypoxia decreases pain sensitivity and increases the expression of Heat shock Inducible Factor, which increases opioid receptors. Specifically, mu and delta opioid receptors increase.

See. Science is fun!

Well if you’re still reading this… good luck!

Warm regards,

♠️1SL❤️

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-2462809/Brains-release-chemical-PAINKILLERS-reduce-sadness.html

https://selfhacked.com/blog/melatonin/

https://www.selfdecode.com/disease/sleep-deprivation/?utm_source=seo&utm_medium=selfhacked&utm_campaign=id00002

https://selfhacked.com/blog/why-the-ice-bucket-challenge-is-so-popular-it-functions-like-heroin/