[inthefallofasparrow]

All you fools are gonna look super dumb when the Queen hobbles out on her walking stick in February, stops in a daze, topples forward and almost falls flat on her face, but at the last second does a forward somersault, jumps back up, and then cheerfully gives a bunch of children a tour of Buckingham Palace, during which she kills them off one by one, in order to choose which one will be the next queen.

[awkwardnotrude-deactivated20240]

[bread-design]

i made a thing.

[wallflowerwaitlist]

monsignor pruitt: are you.... an angel of the lord?

vampire who is about to start a death cult: oh, you haven't heard the good news?

[terror-slut]

Me infiltrating Crockett island to get the hot vampire priest to fuck me:

[awkwardnotrude-deactivated20240]

[dc-comic-girl-deactivated202302]

Sarah, in mass, thinking the priest is staring at her because he knows she’s gay:

Father Pruitt, staring at her because he knows she’s secretly his daughter:

[imnotnancy]

mike flanagan when he's going to make a new thing

[jellyish]

Nothing about the ending of midnight mass was more satisfying than the juxtaposition of the Sheriff and his son praying together on the beach while Bev Keane digs hysterically in the sand trying to hide from the sun.

[gothicprep]

why is your cat green?

She’s built different 😌

[gothicprep]

Look i tried to laugh it off, but I haven’t stopped thinking about this message because… my cat literally isn’t green

like where is the green

[gothicprep]

Oh Christ

[sapropel]

This is the color your cat is

[lazygravez]

colors i eyedropped directly from op's cat

[baggytrousers27]

Somewhere in this cat’s fur, resides Pantone 448 C.

[satyriconmp3]

cultural touchstone

[authenticstains]

[mermaidbones]

real hot girl shit

[sunflowerbutch]

nothing will remind you that eating is good and okay like fantasy books will. “and that night in the valley they brought out the best plum cake and sweet cream, trout and turnips roasted over the fire, mead and goatsmilk and fresh cold water from the spring-“ and it’s like yeah dude you’re absolutely right. then sometimes it’s like “as he slept that night in the woods, he sorely missed the valley, where they brought out the best plum cake-“ and it’s like man that sucks i’ll have some seconds in his honor

[redbelles]

bitch are we in narnia???

[seymour-butz-stuff]

[lessermores]

The best writing I’ve ever seen about the monarchy. The rest is here.

[trustthechef]

To note, the Irish Times is the primary, most respected newspaper in the country

[barbeauxbot]

And it is well-deserved.

[nicolauda]

prince phillip is dead and the newsreader was like “this has come as a shock to many” babe where have you BEEN

[politedemon]

[lesbx]

this is by far the funniest jigsaw_quotes post i genuinely cannot stop thinking about the sight of like, jigsaw opening his wallet in the checkout line at the Death Trap Lowe’s and he has like two pennies and a dime in there. and he just sighs