ripe&ruin

[gildcdlily]

— SARGO / sagabites‌.

𝙴𝚈𝙴𝙱𝚁𝙾𝚆𝚂  𝙵𝚄𝚁𝚁𝙾𝚆  𝙵𝙾𝚁  𝚃𝙷𝙴  𝙼𝙾𝙼𝙴𝙽𝚃.  suddenly  he  felt  regret  in  his  attempts  to  reconcile  with  the  other.  gently  tucking  his  hands  in  the  pockets  of  his  rather  (  uncomfortable  )  and  tight  pants.  “  woah.  “  he  jokes,  gently  leaning  against  the  brick  wall,  pulling  out  a  cigarette  and  placing  it  between  his  lips.  saying  barely  anything,  he  moves  the  lighter  with  one  hand  covering  as  the  tip  ignites.  his  eyes  draw  to  the  side  before  tilting  his  head  at  carmilla.  “  you  know  your  attitude  has  been  catching  the  attention  of  the  high  council  lately.  “  inhaling  the  smokey  paradise,  he  exhales  before  offering  a  glare.  “  might  want  to  control  that,  you  know  how  the  feel  about  the  emotionally  unstable.  “ 

               honestly, she could just leave right now. but her feet remain planted on the ground because, well, she was here first. always been a stubborn little creature. she sits on the small ledge the stained glass provides her, makes herself comfortable even if this interaction has her even more on edge. she rolls her eyes, crossing one leg over the other. it’s obvious that even though the high council never explicitly states that attendance is compulsory, their presence still feels like a knife held to her throat. she clicks her tongue. ‘ that’s going to be a bit of an issue seeing as they’re the reason behind it. ’ the clouds outside seem to move past the moon, the light casting down an array of colours over her through the stained glass. ‘ among other things, that is. ’

[gildcdlily]

— SERENA / sagabites‌.

𝙷𝙴𝚁  𝙴𝚈𝙴𝚂  𝚂𝚃𝙰𝚁𝙴  𝙾𝚄𝚃,  all  she  can  manage  is  a  slight  huff.  it  didn’t  help  that  she  was  forced  to  carry  the  burden  of  carmillas  dread.  gently  pushing  the  bitter  liquid  to  the  back  of  her  throat,  the  witch  had  managed  to  let  her  eyes  adjust  to  the  party  around  them.  “  who  ever  thought  this  would  be  𝙽𝙾𝚁𝙼𝙰𝙻? “ she  gently  smirked,  nudging  the  woman  beside  her.  “  we  just  need  to  socialize,  you  know  the  high  council  is  constantly  on  our  ass.”  sure,  it  was  smart  to  force  generations  of  grudges  together  in  the  same  town… not.  the  redhead  gently  up  and  downed  the  vampire,  before  offering  a  playful  wink.  “  to  make  a  certain  someone  fall  to  his  knees… or  death.  who  cares,  both  ways. “ 

               to answer that question, she did once. but not anymore, and that’s what matters here. ‘ fuck the high council. ’ she mutters out loud, taking a long sip from her drink. her words are specifically targeted towards one of the vampires on the council who can’t quite stand the idea of an elder becoming a sanguinarian. ‘ besides, i doubt what they’re doing is considered to be socialising. this is a buffet. ’ the distaste is clear in her tone. at the witch’s playful remark, carmilla only shakes her head, red lips curling up into a smirk. ‘ don’t tempt me now. ’

[gildcdlily]

               it’s a bold move. that is, leaving an arguably okay spot in search for some fresh air when her patience for all this begins to wear thin. the problem isn’t sitting still in one place, but the place itself that almost suffocates the vampire. the underlying scent of blood in the air isn’t the only thing suffocating her, of course. weaving through the crowd and shoving away anyone who gets too close, she ends up in a somewhat less crowded area of the church, upstairs by the stained glass. finally. ‘ for fuck’s sake, ’ carmilla almost snarls when she senses an unwanted presence interrupting her, crimson eyes already defaulted into a glare when she turns around. ‘ i will rip out your — ’ she pauses when she recognises him. the one person she’s been trying to avoid the whole night. ‘ oh, it’s you. ’ she deadpans, disappointment clear in her tone since she was looking forward to ripping someone’s heart out as a means to vent out her annoyance. unfortunately, she’s already done that to the man before her.               — @sagabites​.

[gildcdlily]

               if carmilla were a few hundred years younger, this party probably would’ve been something she enjoyed. unfortunately, that isn’t the case for the vampire now. because now, she sits on one of the few unoccupied couches looking as if she’d rather have a wooden stake plunged into her heart than to remain here any longer. someone approaches her with their intentions as clear as the marks on their exposed skin and she sends them away with a piercing glare, crossing her legs and readjusting the metal across her chest. ‘ this is a waste of time. ’ carmilla grits out to the witch beside her without looking at her. that is, until she spots someone she really doesn’t want to see. she glances at serena for a nicer view. ‘ remind me why we’re here again ? ’          — @sagabites​.

[memetaped]

nonverbal starters prompts featuring nonverbal scenarios.

guide take them by the hand, arm, or shoulder to guide them.

shelter protect them.

shove push them.

loop drape an arm around their shoulders.

touch a gentle touch like rubbing their back, hugging them, holding their hand. 

kiss a kiss on the cheek, knuckles, forehead, in their hair.

palm smack them upside the head.

bed rest gently push them back down when they try getting out of bed.

aid help them with a task.

note pass a note to them.

cry wipe away their tears.

wash wipe something off their forehead, cheek, so on.

bandage patch them up when they get hurt.

heal take care of them when they get sick.

book silently read a story with them. 

carry pick them up. 

scrap punch them.

cherry find blood on them.

sit help them sit down.  

medical wake up in the hospital and find them holding their hand.

steer place a hand under their chin to make them look up. 

beat dance with them.

stare stare them down. 

off track get lost with them.

no shaking their head in disagreement. 

yes nodding their head in agreement.

rush tackle them to the ground.

open hold the door open for them.

[valtsv]

i hate it when people ask me to "explain my thought process" like hell if i know

[valtsv]

"what's going on in that head of yours?" nothing i want to be a part of

[gildcdlily]

— TEMANUARII / sagaborn‌.

“I wonder what they’d say if they showed up here right this second,” he says, closing his eyes again to focus on a breathing technique to calm himself down enough to get up again. The cold air in his nose is more evidence that his senses have sharpened. He will relaxation into the muscles of his neck and head— that’s where the pressure is the worst. It comes in as a trickle, but he wins over, and at last the prominent ache in his jaw subsides and the spams stop. 

“I have licked the wounds of vampires, Carmilla,” Manny says with a smile. “You taste like a lake rock.” He laughs and braces himself against the tree to stand. He pats Carmilla on the upper arm assuringly, and clears his throat. He remains steady on his feet, he is not concerned. Manny is still uncomfortable but he has a friend, and he has the beauty of the night. “I’m alright,” he finally says, and motions for her to continue on with him along the path. “I’m afraid I don’t have any frame of reference for how this is affecting me.”

               ‘ nothing nice, i’d assume. ’ she says, watching the man calm himself down with deep breaths. honestly, how could anyone actually enjoy this night ? ‘ you say that as if that’s worse. ’ she teases, before nodding when he says he’s okay and continuing their walk. a good number of people must’ve retreated to the clubs and houses since the streets aren’t as busy as they were earlier.

               ‘ i’m guessing you have no plans for tonight then ? ’ she shoots him a curious yet knowing look, her tone lighthearted. they both know the implication behind her question. after all, she is quite close with one of his many ex-wives. while she has no problem with his lifestyle, it would be pretty amusing to the vampire if she turned out to be right.

[bassiter]

Visit Original Link

I Bet on Losing Dogs by Mitski except over the speakers in a hotel’s indoor pool at 1am. You feel like the only person awake in the whole world as you lazily swim, around occasionally ducking your head underwater and staying there just long enough for you to feel something other than loneliness. 

[junname]

https://www.instagram.com/p/BnVM40phDWR/?utm_source=ig_share_sheet&igshid=14tfm7n6qmf9s

[gildcdlily]

— TEMANUARII / sagaborn‌.

He manages something akin a laugh— he knows she is having a hard time too. What else were they doing here other than distracting themselves from the pull of the moon? Manny never did pride himself on suffering a transformation silently. There is no bravery in isolating yourself to pain. And so when the spasms take him again he groans, and tries to breathe through it, leaning against a tree, feeling slightly more grounded because of it. As it hits his mouth fills with blood again, like a rush of saliva, he spits again.

“Not quite,” he says with a self-deprecating tone. “Doesn’t hurt as much as under a Blood Moon, but it’s… so much more raw.” Her hand on his shoulder is actually more soothing than she can know. He’s always been a man for whom physical touch as been a calming balm. He looks at her, taking an emphatic deep breath, as he tries to grin at her through his pain. “What does it do for you? Werewolf blood? I’ve always been curious.”

               there’s little comfort she can offer him and she winces when he spits out blood again. the smell of iron has her nose scrunching up in distaste, even if she feels much more parched than usual. when she thinks that she’s in control of her hunger and need to feed, it’s only natural for the blood moon to knock down all the barriers she’s built over the years. but so far, she’s doing good. and she can only hope it says that way.

               his question gets a short laugh out of her. ‘ i’ve tried it once. can’t recall it doing much to me, but can’t say the same for the one who got bit. ’ not like she stayed long enough to witness what happened. ‘ i wouldn’t go out of my way to try it again. ’ her next words take on a teasing tone in attempt to make light of the situation at hand. ‘ you guys just taste strange. like dirt. hardly something to seek out. ’

[gildcdlily]

— TEMANUARII / sagaborn‌.

@gildcdlily sent:  “I swear to god, if you get blood on me…” for manny !

“Then move away from me, Carmilla,” he says urgently. He exhales something near a growl as another spasm claims him. He spits more blood, he will not change here. This Blood Moon was not something he enjoyed, he felt on edge, this was like an open channel, a faucet turned on full strength. It’s as if the moon wants him to turn, something he has had control of near-perfectly for centuries.Temanuarii has never enjoyed the symptoms of change, his particular line were not far from the originals, but his certain had pain during transformation. He would not change, not into his full form. But he’s already moving toward his partial form, all in the jaw and teeth and skull. He groans again, taking in a strong and deep breath. Perhaps this discomfort would be eased if he simply accepted that this is what his body wanted.

               ‘ don’t have to tell me twice. ’ frankly, it would be in her best interest to leave him altogether, the scent of blood — albeit werewolf blood — doing her no good. the effects of the moon already has her fangs out and her eyes a crimson red, since those are unavoidable to begin with, though they’re nothing compared to what manny’s going through. carmilla couldn’t be more grateful that vampirism has nothing to do with bones rearranging and cracking themselves into place. all that said, she can’t really leave him either since she did tell rindy that she would try to keep an eye out for him during the harvest. ‘ c’mon, this is nothing you aren’t used to. ’ she awkwardly pats him on the shoulder. ‘ just... breathe ? ’ helpful.

[gildcdlily]

               the blood moon was once kind to carmilla. back when her principles were different and allowed her to enjoy the occasion, the vampire had no qualms with turning newborns and doing whatever she pleased, whatever the moon enabled her to do. the need to find a mate was the first thing she prepared herself to suppress for the first blood moon since she became sanguinarian, though perhaps it was something she held back before that.

               and to repress the carnal side brought out by the change of the tides is no easy feat. it’s still something carmilla is trying to master, even if it’s been more than a century since she left behind her former title.

              she can feel the bloodthirst in the back of her throat as she stares out her window, watching other creatures of the night celebrate outside the hotel under the moonlight. lose all inhibitions for one night. it’s a fight against her nature but she rolls her eyes at it anyway, nails digging into her palms as the thirst grows, begging to be quenched. for every instinct she defies, another war against herself is won. 

             as expected, tonight is different. 

             this year’s harvest makes all the difference with everyone, both stranger and familiar face, gathered in one place. perfect for classic blood moon festivities, not so perfect for the sanguinarian vampire. a strange kind of yearning tugs at her heartstrings, bringing up forgotten, stored away memories as she watches the scene below play out, every cell in her body telling her she should be down there with them. just like how it had been during the last harvest she attended.

               crimson eyes glance at the moon strung up in the sky. the blood moon, once kind, now fills carmilla with an unsettling feeling, more so than the days leading up to the night. her gaze sharpens into a defiant glare as she shuts the curtain, having long learned that there is no point in avoiding messes that are bound to find her eventually. it’s just a matter of what’ll hit her first.

[heartshop]

Margaret Atwood, from Power Politics

[poetsonart]

John Singer Sargent, Carnation, Lily, Lily, Rose (1855) // Emily Dickenson, The Letters of Emily Dickenson (1856)

[unchildhood]

THE CRUCIBLE x KELLY AKASHI

Arthur Miller, The Crucible (1953)

Kelly Akashi, sculptures, Bound (2017) + Feel Me (2017)

[gildcdlily]

— GUINEVERE / gloriiam‌.

    a library was full of secrets to find and the muffled stillness was the sort of atmosphere guinevere was always willing to welcome with ease. delicate fingers pull out a book bound in red leather, cracked and dry with age, the thin volume smells faintly of pipe tobacco and dust. the pages within are brittle and what remains of the book’s original stitching is barely holding it together. there is no title, no author’s name. just mystery and more lost history. the feeling causes a heaviness in the middle of her chest that she cannot place, and because of this, it’s easier for guinevere to ignore the feeling and focus her attention on spotting the raven-haired vampire.     guinevere silently makes her way towards the previous elder slowly before turning her back to hide her face. once carmilla acknowledges her presence, the angel can’t hide a toying smile on rosy-lips. “ i’m here to see a familiar face, ” she says, looking over her shoulder with her chin delicatly tucked in, eyes finding the vampire. “ so, yes. i do believe you can help me. ”

               unsurprisingly, she conceals the shock at the old friend standing before her, lips curling into a small smile instead. ‘ certainly didn’t expect to see you here. ’ she wonders if it’s the woman’s first time in bielefeld. carmilla can’t figure out an exact number as to how long it’s been since she last saw guinevere, which already says enough itself. probably when she was still an elder, meaning there’s a lot to catch up on — if prompted. it’s nothing to complain about though. guinevere isn’t a familiar face the vampire would complain about. ‘ guessing you aren’t here for a regular vacation. how have you been ? ’

[gildcdlily]

— TAEMIN / inxcs‌.

the library smells of parchment and dust.  rows and rows of leather and sheepskin bound books sit heavy on shelf after shelf, but the library doesn’t fill crowded.  light streams from a window, cutting him into shadows on the clean floor as he searches for a anyone who looks familiar enough with the place to find what he needs.  “oh thank the mother, i was starting to think i’d have to come back——,” he sighs in relief, reaching for his phone to show her a screenshot of an amazon page.  the book’s a copy of a copy, english print in a simple typeface with an unknown author and off-translated title.  “i’m looking for an original translation.  hebrew, or aramaic will do if that’s what you have.”

               curious eyes glance at the screenshot and she runs through her memories for the book, brows furrowed slightly. ‘ well, we should have it, i’m sure. but i can’t guarantee someone hasn’t beat you to it. ’ it is after all a peak time for people to make use of the library’s vast original resources with so many coming from all over the place. her head already aches just thinking about how disorganised everything will eventually be. she keeps her gloves on as she guides him to a different part of the library, clicking her tongue when it turns out she was right. ‘ yeah, someone’s already taken it out. ’