022020
This has been on my notes for a couple of months now. I composed this unsure of if I could still give this to you. The original plan was to read this out loud to you but here it goes...
13 years ago, I never thought that we would be THIS close. That we could be like this. (Who wouldāve thought?) We didnāt even have our HIs and HELLOs back then. Actually, we didnāt even have a conversation at all. I never knew before that youāre in the same circle with my closest friends (palagi ka kasing busy eh missing in action ha ha). During high school, I only knew you by your name and face, you're way out of my league. You know what they say... the popular one. :)
Years passed and the time came when I'm with our friends, and your name actually pops-out, but I didnāt pay attention. I didn't pay much attention about what they have to say about you, your love-life and as to when you want to see us to hangout, etc. We would sometimes meet you and I was just, there, on the sidelines, drinking my beer and minding my own business and I never looked at you the way Iām looking at you now. I could remember you as the funny one, charming, the life of the party, you know.. everyone's favorite. Maybe that's why I didn't have a hard time admiring you. Your witty remarks, your on-the-spot jokes, and how on the go you are. But I kept my hands off as you were taken, and I really didn't have the intention to like you, you're way out of my reach. When I heard about your stories and all the things you had to go through, I was thinking, if I could go back in time, I'd find you so that I could love you longer.
But then I realized while looking back, I wouldnāt have it any other way. Maybe because if there were no gaps, and the timespan wasn't that long right before we became close, it wouldnāt be like this. Maybe we are just like me-Paula-B to each other. Maybe our time today together was molded to be just ours, that we had to wait that long for us to go through what we experienced so that we have stories and lessons to tell to each other. I admire you for being so good even after all the pain you went through. Even though I know you would never believe me, I'd still tell you anyway. I'd tell you every day until you believe it yourself because of someone as good and lovely as you shouldnāt feel that way. I may not be like the ones you usually see on the television, videos, billboards, and Facebook pages :)))) but I'll be the one you see right beside you when you feel like you're not enough or lovable (like what you always say).
That Saturday night that I sat right beside you??, I didnāt have the intention to flirt. Actually, that night, I was supposed to go home straight after I jogged, but thank God, nanaig yung lasinggera ako and I chose alcohol rather than sleeping hahaha.










