when will Ghost shut up?

ill eat yer damn knees

[puppygirl-hornyposting2]

[livingroom-ghost]

Accidentally imagined Lin Manuel Miranda rapping Baby Annihilation at work today and now everyone in the office thinks I’m on meth

[angelicguy]

on a tf2 server you keep getting followed by a sniper called the lovesick sniper and youre like the lovesick sniper please stop following me and he stops and uses an smg to shoot a heart into the wall and looks back at you

[anininas]

My brain wouldn't leave me alone until I drew it, that's all I have to say to this

[donthitanybody]

Tomska going hard on Twitter again.

[uniquecrash5]

He's right.

[letitrainathousandflames]

hey what the entire FUCK happened to tumblr's balls???

[letitrainathousandflames]

I should have clarified. I was talking about these (deez?):

WHY are they OVAL they should be SPHERICAL

[lamaenthel]

Oh no I fear it is your balls that need a physician's care my friend

[letitrainathousandflames]

OH NO--

[letitrainathousandflames]

Don't do this to me, I already have enough problems with these oval balls of mine

[letitrainathousandflames]

Stop playing inflation with my notes and tell staff to inflate my balls back into their normal shape!!!

[legalizegay]

Must watch

[capacity]

This could save the world you know

[beboots]

[elodieunderglass]

The professionalism and confidence really sell me but I’m still left wondering about some of the highly specific benefits. Was the Titty Cream the same substance as the Ear Cream…? How do you benefit from the green potion on the back of the head ONLY. And so on.

[elodieunderglass]

I feel like I watched this alongside a chorus of angels

[girljeremystrong]

PLEASE watch this. i love chaotic sisters best dynamic in the world

[anais-ninja-bitch]

1. this should be required viewing for anyone writing young girls, especially sisters

2. she did a good job and totally saved their asses.

[ovadrive]

[castellankurze]

The Gimli Glider is one of those stories where every aspect sounds more fake than the last and yet it all actually happened.

-A passenger plane was underloaded with fuel because Canada had just converted to the metric system and everyone supposed to double check their numbers got it wrong. -When the plane ran out of fuel they were too far away to make it to an in-service airport and had to head towards the Gimli military base.  Which was shuttered. -They were coming in to fast due to a lack of flaps control and had to perform a series of slips (as shown in the video above) to slow down, basically drifting a giant passenger plane. -As they come down they realized that just because Gimli’s been decommissioned doesn’t mean it’s abandoned because a bunch of people are having drag races on the runway they’re about to need. -Despite everything they managed to land safely and no one was killed or even hurt which is why it’s one of the best air disasters to meme on.

[zanmor]

The Wikipedia page on this is fantastic and my favorite line from it is “Flying with all engines out was never expected to occur, so it had never been covered in training.”

[lesferatu]

Nice

[holygeist]

completely obsessed with this. partially inspired my slavic breakfasts. i’m planning a vampire dinner where everything i cook is going to be red.

[passionesolja]

Still can’t get over how beautiful Astarion is. Like goddamn

[doberbutts]

As inspired by my cane post/anon

Y'all. Genuinely from the bottom of my heart. You do not need permission from A Real Disabled in order to get a disability aid. If you think you would benefit from the use of such a thing, then get one.

If you're really afraid of "taking resources" from "someone who needs it more" then get two and donate the second one to a charity specifically for whatever disability you think you're stealing from.

Truly. If more people used aids they thought would help them, more aids would be mass-produced and available on the market, and it would be more normalized to see people using things to help them to do stuff. We evolved to be tool users to make things easier on ourselves. So use the tools that are available if you think your life would be made easier with its use.

[jmtorres]

also! if you don't know if you "really need it" look. the world is not built for mobility aids. if you are ablebodied they end up seeming like they're more trouble than they're worth.

so if you try using a mobility aid like a cane or a walker or a wheelchair and it makes your life easier, YOU REALLY NEED IT. if its usefulness to you makes it easier to get around and outweighs the hassle of bringing it places, that means you really actually need it.

[livingroom-ghost]

Literally most of the doors at my work have a button for if you need it to open automatically and everyone uses them so much that it takes less than a week to fix when they break.

[hedgehog-moss]

I got a phone call from the police station about my teenage llama this week, telling me some tourists had called them upon seeing a llama crossing the road, who “stopped when she saw us” and “refused to give way” (their complaint in French sounded amazingly traffic-related, “elle n’a pas cédé le passage”…) The policeman told them yeah that’s our Pampe! don’t worry about it she’s living her life, you can try to pet her but she’s shy with strangers… Imagine calling the police about a llama refusing to abide by basic road rules and being told haha that’s our girl! Give her a pat for me! Pampérigouste, you are very annoying and very loved.

I started following that road looking for her, occasionally calling her with my special I Come Bearing Muesli whistle (and it was a lie), and as soon as I got mobile reception I received a text from a neighbour telling me “Ton affreuse est là” (“your horrible one is here”). I turned around to go pick her up, and discovered that he had locked her in the Horny Bull Pen, aka his most securised enclosure. When Pampe escapes to his farm just to be a pest she usually hangs out with his cows until I arrive and he doesn’t mind, so it was a little joke, and it was so funny finding Pampe languishing in a high-security prison. She looked very put out and I told her she absolutely deserved her sentence. Then I opened the gate and I didn’t even need my rope, she was happy to be pardoned and to see Pandolf, and followed us readily, on the road and then through the woods to my farm, it felt so companionable, the three of us walking home together.

[llamanonymous]

oh this is such a happy tale

[stevviefox]

This needs to be a picture book

[livingroom-ghost]

Tumblr presented me with the “never shuts the fuck up” award

[livingroom-ghost]

I have shit memory so when my work is planning a function to be held during office hours I delete the email so I can be pleasantly surprised

[softwaring]

[daisies-on-a-cup]

Norwegian Wood, Haruki Murakami //@danielcalmdown//So What's Wrong?, What Love Comes To, by Ruth Stone//dog thoughts, Anna Haifisch (@/anna_haifisch on twitter)//love without witnesses, by s.s. @pendulum-north//Addie Bundren, As I Lay Dying by William Faulkner//eclipse, 2013, @wiktorjackowski//Secondo, Hannibal 3x3//Gift, by Melissa Houpert//Ghismonda with the heart of Guiscardo (Detail), Bernardino Mei//Oculus, Sally Wen Mao