Do you take requests? I would love to see a Ravio from you!
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@loruleanmerchant
Do you take requests? I would love to see a Ravio from you!
Silly purple bunny vendor boyo and the funny bird creature
"...You people frighten me..."
Somehow, that was even worse!! Sephiroth would rather take a banishment from the store than someone being afraid of him like that!! His cheeks flushed from embarrassment and shame that he actually bit a random person.
"I'm sorry!! I-I don't know what came over me!!" He covered his face with his hands. He wanted to die. he wanted the floor to open up and eat him and die.
"I could hazard a guess." Ravio was already back on his feet, making his way back to his table to wrap up and send off the sword and shield he'd acquired.
"Just take this, will you?" Trembling hands held out the duo of weapons, "I don't know what kind of hero these belong to, but if its enough to earn such violent ire, I don't think I want to know!"
Ok, maybe Sephiroth did take it too far. He vsibily winced when the trinkets fell on the poor guy's head. He waited a moment before carefully approaching him to make sure he was okay with a guilty look on his face.
He had a feeling the reason he was asking for his name was not a good one. "A...are you gonna ban me from the shop?"
He pulled the rabbit hood back over his face, to save himself from any further embarrassment, "Less that."
"I want to know who to steer clear of! Because, I can't say in all my endeavors, I've ever been assaulted like that! Just take what you want next time, this was just cruel!"
Sephiroth stared down at him like a large cat staring down a mouse, pupils slit and all. His face brought out an urge and Sephiroth bit his cheek before he could control himself.
"You don't have to do all that. I was going to wear it anyway!" he snatched back the hat and moved away from him. He unfolded it and placed it back on his head,
"A---IIIYE!! What was that?!" Ravio cradled his cheek as he was released, and shuffled as far back as he could, though, crashed into a wall meanwhile...
Which would be fine....If a couple of display trinkets didn't fall off the shelf to hit the young merchant in the head.
"What did you say your name was again?"
"I said, give it back!!" Sephiroth pounced on the older boy and grabbed at the hat. It was one thing for him to steal it from Shadow, but it was another to lose it! He wasn't going to get yelled at by the boy because this guy was a worse thief!
"You brute!! Get off of me! Do you know how to use your eyes?!" Despite the fact Ravio was a coward, he was not afraid to use his lip if the situation so called for it! The boy made an attempt to kick the younger teenager off of him, but his constitution was far weaker, less seasoned, clearly.
"I was setting everything all nice for you to send back, and instead you've gone and attacked me! Are you crazy!!!"
"Give that back! Shadow technically gave it to me, so it's not stealing!" He paused when he saw Ravio's face. This was obviously not Shadow and it caught him off guard. "it doesn't suit you at all!"
"My, my, demanding are we." Ravio removed the cap and even folded it neatly, creasing it down its middle for the most even fold he could manage. "How was I supposed to know it belonged to a hero...These items were unassuming and unattended. Hardly responsible, right?" He explained as he began to interlock the straps, giving the hat a nice safe place to be tucked.
"Are there a lot of heroes here?"
Sephiroth looked at the sword and shield, immediately recognizing them as Shadow's. "Of course they are, those already belong to someone, you thief! Give them back!"
"...Is that hat even your's?" Ravio quickly swapped his rabbit hood out to try on the black cap, it was familiar enough. "I think this suits me more than you..." Not to mention, it's doing a whispy spectre-like thing. "Where did you get this?"
"No, I don't like it! I'm just browsing! Do you even work here?"
"Sure do! My stock might be limited, but that doesn't mean I can't be here!"
"If you know anyone in need of a sword and shield, send them Ravio's way!" That's him! "I've got this gaudy set that seems well loved and used!" Spoiler: it's Shadow's.
"Why do TV shows always have two girls fighting over an indecisive guy? They deserve better than that." Sephiroth back at it again with standing in front of a shop's TV. Is this kid ever gonna buy himself a TV...?
"Hey, buddy, are you just going to stand there, or buy something? That show isn't even that good, do you like trash programming, or something?"
POV: A stranger you have never even met brought you to your home while you were unconscious
β the A in my name stands for always right. β
"I hate to say it, Mr.Bard...But, I'm hardly sold on that..."
"Yes, a permit. Most reputable merchants have one. Am I to assume you don't? We may have an issue if so."
"Ehhh---!! O--Of course I have a permit...I just left it...In my homeworld!" Did he even have a permit to sell out of Link's house? Probably not...
"Being spirited away yourself...Well, surely you can see where I'm coming from!"
YET ANOTHER ROUNDUP OF ASOLUTELY UNHINGED COMEDIC RELIEF
ASSORTED SENTENCE STARTERS FROM AROUND THE INTERNET, including quotes from Tumblr, Pinterest, TikTok, and X (formerly known as Twitter), for when a muse wants to be a bit silly <333
CHANGE gendered words and in-universe phrases as needed.
SPECIFY muse for multimuses.
β I am not merely a clown; Iβm the entire damn circus! β
β I will bite you if you continue this behavior. β
β Being a dramatic ass bitch isnβt a personality trait; itβs a lifestyle! β
β Trauma? Oh β¦ you mean, my lore? β
β why must I cite sources? is it not enough to just say βtrust me, broβ? β
β sorry for being a perfect sweetie and a genius it will likely happen again. β
β forget about touching grass; I need to touch WATER I NEED TO GO INTO THE OCEAN I NEED TO DIVE INTO THE SEA!!! β
β Iβm attracted to men with muppet energy and no i will not be explaining. β
β you want me to make friends with people? the thing that killed julius caesar? β
β whatβs your birthstone? mine is rock bottom. β
β I absolutely hate that Iβm not bioluminescent. Pathetic. β
β ohhhhh my god i have got to stop mourning the past or whatever. β
β you expect me to act like a normal human being? Iβm wearing a turtleneck! β
β i donβt struggle with same sex attraction Iβm actually very good at it. β
β unfortunately i often find out without even getting the chance to fuck around. β
β Iβm bisexual which means that Iβm attracted to anybody who can defeat me in physical combat. β
β all anyone needs to know about me is that iβm a dumbass and i love women. β
β sorry but philosophers arenβt impressive i came up with stuff like that when i was 12. β
β I pay my own bills; I can cuss all I want! β
β I donβt have rizz; I have sad eyes and a weird presence. β
β my demons are chasing me and theyβre doing the Naruto run. β
β honey we are ALL doomed by the narrative. it's not that serious. have some fun with it. β
β dating me is like interviewing a psych ward patient. β
β being a girl with very large brown eyes comes with great responsibility. β
β iβm autistic in ways that you canβt even begin to imagine. β
β being a loser may be a phase to you but its a lifestyle for me. β
β entering a magical portal in the woods would fix me. β
β Iβm lonely but not in a hot mysterious way; more like in a pathetic way. β
β life is so unserious just say womp womp and move on! β
β youβre vibing? In this economy? β
β just because Iβm small doesnβt mean I canβt kick your ass. β
β my primary motivators are fear, spite, and aesthetic longing. β
β sorry about the chaos; I needed attention. β
β WHAT IS UP GIRL you look foreboding and malicious! β
β baby i can be your problematic bi wife. β
β i donβt think any of you understand how important i am to the plot. β
β what if we are both red flags? what then? β
β any dream can be a prophetic dream if youβre willing to do some really weird shit. β
β my hobbies include being right, being gay, and being a hater. β
β i have a phd in Loving The Color Pink And Also Glitter. β
"Wh--two thousand dust!? That is highway robbery! For rent only? Gods, what has this city come to? Do you even have a permit to sell?"
"I would hardly consider the means to protect your life a means of robbery! I am simply offering the option...Of course it will come at a price." Of extorting people, no less.
"...Permit?" Well. That could be a problem.
"oh, c'mon. don't give me that look. i was just kidding."
"What look? There's no look, Mr.Bard." Ravio will remember this transgression.
&. π¬π’π₯ππ§π π‘π’π₯π₯ π π«ππ¦ππ€π π¬ππ§πππ§ππ π¬πππ«πππ«π¬.
(Β dialogue prompts taken from the silent hill 2 remake, developed by bloober team. trigger warning for dark themes. feel free to change as you seem fit. )
β in my restless dreams, i see that town. β
β hey, it's okay. i didn't mean to scare you. β
β i'm kind of lost. β
β i guess i don't really care if it's dangerous or not. i'm going either way. β
β what happened to this town? β
β whatever it is, it's not human. β
β i didn't do anything! he was like that when i got here. β
β you wanna come with? maybe together we can find a way out of this town. β
β sorry, but i can't leave. not yet. β
β are you afraid? β
β did you find the person that you were looking for? β
β don't worry, i'm not crazy. least, i don't think so. β
β should i go with you? this town really is dangerous. β
β what's a big dumb-dumb like you doing here anyway? β
β hey, that's not very nice. didn't your parents teach you any manners? β
β do i look like your girlfriend? β
β i can't believe it. your face, your voice... you could beβ β
β i don't look like a ghost, do i? see? warm. β
β i can show you if you want. unless you have somewhere else to be? something else to do? β
β hey, easy there. i'm just messing with you. β
β you're coming with me? can't you just tell me where it is? β
β what, you were just gonna leave me here? alone? with all these monsters around? β
β is it because i remind you of... her? β
β this place we're going to, what is it, exactly? β
β you ever stay in a place like this? the walls are so thin you can hear everything. love, hate, jealousy... β
β i think you just saved my life back there. β
β hey. you think i'd look good in this one? β
β this room... there's something wrong with it. i think we should leave. β
β oh, loosen up. it sure beats running around with those monsters out there. β
β what will you tell her if... when you find her? β
β oh, c'mon. don't give me that look. i was just kidding. β
β can we stay? just for a little while? β
β this place, this whole thing, it's like a nightmare. i just wanted to get away from it, even for a second. β
β here. something to take the edge off. β
β we should probably get going. β
β we could come back later, if you want. you know, in case we need a break. β
β i wanted to ask you... what if you can't find [ name ]? what will you do? β
β thanks for checking up on me. it's very sweet of you. β
β how do you know my name? β
β i'm sorry, but i can't let you just run around this place. you might get hurt. β
β please open the door. there's something in here. β
β i was almost killed back there! i've never been so scared in my whole life! β
β all you care about is that dead wife of yours. β
β you couldn't care less about me, could you? β
β stay with me. don't leave me alone again. you're supposed to take care of me. β
β i don't know, for some reason i feel like it's up to me to protect her. β
β well, whaddaya know... a stroll in the rain. how romantic. β
β i'm trying to keep things light. just humor me, okay? β
β you think you could give me a hand? β
β you're supposed to be the big man around here. how's a little girl like me supposed to help? β
β what's wrong? i thought you wanted to get out of here. β
β this place is different from what i remember. i guess... things never really stay the same, do they? β
β you... still don't want me to go with you? if we stick together, we just might make it out of here. β
β ain't no big deal. just put the gun to their head and... pow! β
β you can't just kill someone 'cause of the way they looked at you. β
β please. i'll be good. i promise. β
β it's always the same with you. you're only after one thing. β
β i don't know who you think i am, but i don't want to hurt you. β
β i thought that thing killed you...! are you hurt? β
β but that thing... it stabbed you. there was blood everywhere. β
β stabbed me? what do you mean? β
β honey... did something happen to you? β
β are you confusing me with someone else? β
β you said you took everything. but you forgot the videotape we made. β
β it doesn't matter who i am. i'm here for you. β
β see? i'm real. β
β don't you want to touch me? β
β i'll come back, i promise. β
β how many times do i have to kill you? β
β it doesn't matter if you're smart, dumb, ugly, pretty... it's all the same once you're dead! β
β you wanna talk down to me some more? tell me to relax? β
β you know i'll find you! β
β guess i deserved it, huh? the fartface that i am. β
β you got any other things planned? i think i saw a dark room back there you could lock me up in. β
β where are you? i'm waiting for you. please, come to me. β
β i think you were right. what we're looking for... it's not here. β
β thank you for helping me earlier... but i wish you hadn't. β
β i know what you are. i know why i needed you. but it's all over now. i don't need you anymore. β
β it'd be easier if they just killed me. β
β why are you still here? i told you to go. β
β wait! please don't go. don't leave me alone. i didn't mean what i said. β
β please... tell me i'll be okay. β
β i'm here for you. so what if i'm not her? β
β i can give you what she never could. i can be better than her. β
β what else do you want me to be? β
β i won't let you do this to me. i won't let you go. β
β the truth is, i hated you. β
β i wanted my life back. β
β i tried. i really did. but... i just... can't go on without you. β
β i can't forgive myself for what i've done. β
β i want you to go on. i want you to live. for yourself and for others. β
β you made me happy. β