Michael:
“…I don’t think you understand. She floats.”
David:
“Welcome to the family, Michael.”
(smiles creepily)
“Now drink this.”
Michael:
“Oh God, it’s happening.”
Grandpa:
“I may not know much about vampires…”
Sam:
“You literally have stakes in your Jeep.”
Grandpa:
“...Fine. I know a little.”
David: “If you could have any superpower, what would it be?”
Michael: “Invisibilit.”
Marko: “Telekinesis.”
Paul: “The ability to fit my whole fist in my mouth.”
Everyone: *staring*
Paul: “What? It’s a talent.”
Sam: “Why are you dressed like that?”
Edgar:Like what?”
Sam: “Like you’re about to fight Dracula in a Denny’s parking lot.”
Max: “I think we need to have a serious conversation about your life choices.”
Star: “You first. You dated my bossy vampire boyfriend’s mom”
Max: “ …Fair”
Grandpa: “ I don’t have to explain myself.”
Lucy: “You literally do. That’s what “parenting” is.”
Laddie: “I’m hungry.”
David: * hands him a juice box*
Laddie: “This tastes weird.”
Paul: “Oh, sorry, that’s blood.”
Laddie: *spits it out*
David: “..Paul.”
Paul: “What? It’s organic.”
Michael: “I’m going to do something stupid.”
Sam: “No, you’re going to do something brave.”
Michael: “It might be stupid and brave.”
Sam: “That’s called “being a Gallagher.””
Michael: “…Wrong universe, Sam.”
everyone: *stares at camera*
Alan: “How do vampires even exist?”
Edgar: “It’s California.”
Alan: “Fair point.”
Star: “Are you flirting with me?”
David: “ I have literally kidnapped you.”
Star: “Okay but like…subtly.”
Paul: “ Why are you glaring at me?”
Marko: “Because you told Laddie he was a “tiny blood burrito.”
Paul: “…He is.”
Sam: “Grandpa, there are vampires in this town!”
Grandpa: * loading fence posts into his truck*
Sam: “Why do you look excited?”
Grandpa: “It’s been a boring decade.”
Lucy: “Max, you’re acting suspicious.”
Max: “Suspicious? Me? I’m just a humble video store owner.”
Alan : “—With a Dracula cape
Max: “It’s a bathrobe.”
Edgar: “It has a collar.”
Michael: “I’m not afraid of you.”
David: “You will be.”
Michael: “…Did you just quote Star Wars at me?”
Sam: “I can’t believe I’m related to you.”
Michael: “You’re just jealous of my cheekbones.”
Sam: “I’m jealous of your common sense leaving the building.”
Dwayne: “What do you call it when you kill a vampire?”
Marko: “Tuesday.”
Paul: “A felony.”
Edgar: “A hobby.”
Alan: “An occupational hazard.”
David: *smirking* “Welcome to the night, Michael.”
Michael: “No thanks, I have a curfew.”
2087
tangentwithtanner
gummygunk
areudirty
izzy806
annaxmalina
discoholicmusic
janainaart
