✌See Ya, Sucker✌🏻

Buncomfortable is ded

[gjoeyjoe]

[quixoticrobotic]

Ah you’re watching sailor moon? I love that anime. The way they just [clenches fist] sail all those fricking moons

[nasty-otter-deactivated20151228]

[beyoncebeytwice]

You've never gotten high?

one time i was at this party where everyone was high and i was the only one not smoking and this dude told me “those that are above the influence….. are always the highest of them all” and that will stick with me forever

[murderoni-blog]

U took something that a high person at a party said to u to heart? He was most definitely kidding lol

[shybat-deactivated20190807]

*romantically calls you dude*

[wolffenstien]

*platonically calls you babe*

[yvaeltel]

me: i want to die

me: oh no what if my friends get worried

me: i want to die™

me: that’s better ,, now it’s ‘ironic’

[witchjock-deactivated20221208]

we were this close to having the best news story of the year

[prasejeebus]

She should have done it

[little-cyes-2]

[boyx-deactivated20190424]

marijuana. sorry only fans of Bob Marley will get this joke

[gotitforcheap-deactivated201611]

*mtv hopping off the bus in next voice*

yo my name is christian

I love music

I’m a free spirit 

one time when I was 15 I got my dick stuck in a mouse trap 

[surprisebitch]

this is sooo sweet <3

[perrfectly]

[murderoni-blog]

me: I wish I had someone to watch the moon with

me @ myself: man what kind of gay ass shit...

[murderoni-blog]

The world: treat women fairly America: well,,, we arent animals like middle eastern people,,,, also america: *brings about as much justice to rape victims as they would to a deer who just got hit by a car*

[murderoni-blog]

*at a bank heist* Accomplice: drive!!!!! Me: *polishing golf clubs* wayyyy ahead of you

[murderoni-blog]

doctor: sir, i'm sorry. the results are in and i'm afraid you have updog

patient: wh- what's updog

doctor, calling a nurse on the hospital's intercom: KAREN GET IN HERE I TOLD YOU I COULD DO IT

[kiszkamoon]

so today i found out that i’m allowed to carry a knife with me to school as long as it’s smaller than 3 ½ inches but i still can’t show my shoulders and if thats not a perfect description of american schooling idk what is

[lucasnoahs]

COVER YOUR SHOULDERS WITH KNIVES

[teacrumps-blog]

Shoulder blades.