i put out a sneak peek for this like 2 months ago sorry it took so long BUT i have delivered at last... moezegect cuddles
part of why i took so long is i originally had a whole different take on the "backstory" that i found made like. no sense so i got mad and left it for a while and eventually completely redid it... current version is still pretty ooc but WHATEVER at least it's cute i hope. go my polyship fluff
the first few panels of that old one were funny though so i'll give you those as a treat
alright so basically kayne wakes up on the floor of arthur's office. human.
he doesn't lose his memories or his vision or anything. he knows exactly what happened and who he actually is and he's PISSED.
and then "john" starts talking and he's like "hastur, what the FUCK"
and hastur (yes, full hastur. not yellow or john.) is JUST as confused like "kayne why the FUCK are we bound together here"
meanwhile:
arthur wakes up. but it doesn't really feel like waking up, exactly. and it's very loud. like a million voices all shouting at him. and he feels... loose and empty... like he's hardly even real
"john?" but there's no response. it's all so loud. and there's something inside him, he can feel it. like a power. it surges at his fingertips. he feels like he could do anything. but he doesn't even know where he is. what he is. what's going on.
meanwhile meanwhile:
"WHERE'S ARTHUR" one of the king's worshippers is currently being pinned to the table by the neck. john, in a body that's like a smaller version of hastur, is growling down at them, demanding answers
"arthur?? it's... it's everywhere, my lord. you know that. o-outer gods are everywhere."
"what the FUCK are you talking about"
"i want to see john." arthur says to the nothing and yet everything that he seems to exist in. "please. i know he's somewhere i can... feel him, i suppose. but can you take me to him?"
and all of the king's servants suddenly scream and scramble away as arthur, in a rather clean suit, appears at the head of the table
john immediately runs up to arthur and catches him before he falls over. it's all so loud. and he still can't fucking see.
"you have a body" he comments to john, but it's weak
"so do you. i think..."
"what do you mean, you think?"
"arthur there's something... wrong. i don't know what we did but something is very very wrong."
meanwhile meanwhile meanwhile:
eddie the maintenance man falls to the ground, dead. the new hole in his head leaks blood onto the carpet.
"yknow, that's what i never liked about how artie let his story play out. he didn't have any fun." and kayne shoots parker, who was already dead on the floor, a couple times just because
he tosses the gun over his shoulder. " come on, hastur!" he steps over the body in the doorway. "where are your little followers holing up these days?"
at one point someone calls kayne "kayne lester" and he absolutely loses his MIND at it. laughs his HEAD off (literally, if he weren't fucking human) and he uses it as MUCH as possible
he meets literally ANYONE and gets all "im kayne! kayne lester, pleasure to meet you." and then shakes their hand really fast. it drives hastur INSANE.
kayne gets shot or something and he's like "oh! fuck! i forgot what human pain feels like! you motherfucker! that actually hurts!" and then kills them
he kills a lot of people
and flirts with hastur the whole time, but i think that's a given
meanwhile meanwhile meanwhile meanwhile:
arthur is clutching john, sobbing into his chest because it's just. so. loud.
ok this post is already so long but i have more. if you're intrigued.
kayne just gets along really well with everything that's ever terrorized arthur
he sings duets with kellin
kellin pulls the caged head out of the water and kayne goes "oh! neato!" and then hands-in-pockets kicks it straight back into the lake
he does not free the wraith.
he receives the baby from that woman and SHAKES it
he's having the time of his life, teasing hastur the whole time
meanwhile, john and arthur are Going Through It
kayne comments about how nice it is to only have one "pretty little voice" in his head instead of 7 million
and "you know, you're pretty cute when you're like this, goldie <3"
"shut the fuck up and drive the car."
meanwhile
"john im scared. what if i become like him? what if i do it all wrong?"
"then we'll fix it. arthur, you have this power now and im sorry. really, i am. but if you don't use it it will destroy you."
contrasted with
"hey goldie, aren't you supposed to take control of my hands or something by now?"
"stop calling me that. i am a king."
"oh, im sorry, love. would you prefer 'john?'"
and
"john they're so loud. i can't hear anything. it's all just voices and they're so loud. they're demanding they're pleading they're screaming john i can't- i can't-"
"im right here, arthur. you can hear me. im right here. my voice is right here."
and he puts arthur's hand on his chest so he can clearly feel the vibrations when he talks
"deep breaths. my voice is right here. you're going to be okay."
but then
"*gasp!* goldie look at that! a cinema! we should go see a movie!"
"kayne are you serious? we need to separate and fix this."
"ughhh god forbid women want to do ANYTHING"
(+ bonus)
"i can sense kayne, i think. he's... human. and he's... well, he's killed a lot of people."
crazy that you can meet heterosexual people on the internet. im so used to gay people in my phone. sometimes there are straight people in my phone too. big news if true.
Anyways i used to think the ao3 tag ‘crack treated seriously’ meant that like actual drugs were treated seriously and would be semi-important to the story and was really confused because dont all people treat that seriously?? Man i really want sausage and syrup
(Obviously trying to not say anything): wow… thats.. such an interesting way to view them! ,,definitely. Interesting! (Very visibly shaking) .,,i need to go.
in order to preserve my internet privacy i’ll have to start feeding everyone misinformation about myself. i don’t eat. i don’t sleep. i don’t breathe. i don’t blink. i don’t have “blood”
Kayne/Ducky @paintcoveredseal - Tumblr Blog | Tumgag