SOUNDS OF PRAYER.

[returnbymori]

⸻ WARNING: This is a 21+ independent, mutuals only, Natsuki Subaru blog for Tappei Nagatsuki ‘Re: Zero’. There will be mature themes (all tagged with tw). If that is not for you, I suggest you unfollow. Most of my portrayal is anime related, deviating slightly with headcanons and interpretations of alternative IF web novels. Knowledge of Re: Zero is not needed, I usually try and acclimate to different worlds anyway as he is pretty flexible.

CARRD.

[returnbymori]

BEHOLD AN UNAVOIDABLE INQUIRY: @fallesto [INSTRUCTING] The sender guides the receiver to touch themself slowly and deliberately.

You don't strike me as the type, but even you could do something this simple for your husband?

Subaru resents him when the words leaves his lips, and continues to fixated on them. Not the conceded infliction behind them but the way they move. How red they are when he plants a kiss on hers and leans back far enough to have the perfect view between her legs. She shuffles her feet near his thighs, covering the one part of her that this farce of a marriage doesn't even—even warrant. More than twenty women willing and he chooses the one adamant on killing him to even suggest such a thing. But then... can she really say this when it's already happening. In the room where the wind glides over the windowsill and over her thighs. Remnants of water she hadn't been able to wipe down with the towel and more droplets trail down her skin from her hair.

"If you were me you wouldn't be saying this—" She's immediately chided for her "insolence". He guides her legs further apart, motioning her to lay back against the plush pillows in effort to make her more comfortable. Subaru's hands still cover where she's most vulnerable, fingers twitching at the intensity of his tone. It takes a while before she can muster the courage, opting to rip them away like a bandaid. There no expectation to—shave during this time, in this world right? Her minds races with all the things she's heard of these kinds of situations, but Regulus never says anything. He simply instructs her to take more pleasure in the moment, to only think of him and nothing else.

It's damn infuriating. Subaru spreads her folds, her middle finger swipe through her slick, glistening in a different way that the sheen of sweat coating her body. She can—oh god—she can hear everything. He's quiet when her fingers rub over her clit over and over, the slick paving the way, making it so easy to go as fast as she'd like. Not too much of course, he stops her right before the heated pit in her belly coils. It sucks but she can understand why, because when he does it over and over the heat boils like lava.

Her noises were kept at minimum before Regulus snapped her fingers and made her watch him while she was acclimating to her own fingers inside her. Subaru could feels the muscle in her legs flex with every movement, how desperate it all became when the humiliation too a backseat for the overwhelming need to finish. They've done it before and Regulus is good but something is different about this, it comes like a third sense. Her mouth warbles around words she can barely hear and a strange moan rips from her throat. "I—please, please, Regulus—fuck."

[returnbymori]

gonna be adding some muses to the multi, working list - Oskar (aot oc) - Celty (durarara) - Jiji (Dandandan)

[returnbymori]

Subaru doesn't want to tell him anything frankly. The mention of Minerva slipped so easily because, well, she did meet her and she did leave quite an impression. One of the only witches that hadn't had her shivering from fear, endlessly perplexed or wanting to ring their neck. It's not common knowledge? Of course she would miss something like that.

The challandaier above shines so brightly in the light illuminated through the windows of the hall. Her tongue feels heavy, like it could fall through her body and into the ground below. "I haven't," Subaru lies. It comes out harsh, but that's how it is. She can't talk about the witches of sin, not with Regulus. Maybe the others, which have no baring, no impression on her aside from a mild interest and quiet awe that they exist to begin with. If he broached the topic of—of that fucking—no. She starts rambling, skin alight with the threat of revealing too much and not knowing enough to lead him away. Regulus is awful but he's perspective when he wants to be, that much is clear. "I haven't met any of them, aren't they dead? How would I meet a corpse? It's dead! For hundreds of years right?"

She simply can't hold her expression when that name rings through her ears. Deus, deus, deus! Subaru bites the inside of her cheek, staring gravely at a golden so intense, he too might be feeling the anxiety permeating around her. It hurts, Regulus being so rough, his hands trying to tear into her flesh through the dress while she fights for air from where her chest is almost concave against his. "The hell does that mean? I-I'm not a Sword Saint, so what? Did you even give a shit about him?" Subaru snaps despite herself, her hands come up to his forearms, roughly attempting to push him away. A crinkle of... something feels like static in the back of her mind as her annoyance with the situation grows. An invisible force—she feels it at her core—as her arm strains from the work of prying them apart. "Does it matter if everyone is gone? You keep your authority from the same witch you hate, I bet that goes over well with your crazy head."

[returnbymori]

Subaru doesn't follow Reinhard like he might have wanted, he simply doesn't have the experience to kiss so... deliberately. He knew most of the heavy lifting would be from him in terms of initiating contact—for a knight like him, he couldn't see pushing him pushing for anything too quickly. Not the way he'd tried to do so many, many times in the past. Subaru knows he would try his best to remain a gentlemen despite all of his advances. He realizes even guys like Reinhard can reach their limits, and it thrills him. The weight around his waist, the strength of him, he almost melts but doesn't (he'll absolutely deny it if you said otherwise.) What he lacks in the ability, he more than makes up for with an earnest flick of his tongue. Suddenly he feels a tinge of jealousy nudging the crevices of his wildly aroused brain.

"How did you learn to kiss like that?" Subaru asks, pouting. A giddiness sets in his shoulders, pressing their foreheads together to pause, just until his breathing steadies. Reinhard's lips are softer than he imagined. He purposefully steers the conversation, content to take about mundane things, normalcy for once in the chaos of this world. It's the best thing to do and it's what he's good at, a part of him hopes they never have to stop kissing despite how strained he looked when Subaru mentioned their friendship. With any luck he they may not remain that way, no matter how much the situation goes awry, if things turn sour Subaru will add his own bit of sweetness until it's back to normal and even better than that!

Hundreds of thousands of millions of loops. Subaru doesn't want to do it. He doesn't want the pain and terror than comes with no knowing where the next strike will come, it sucks. Whether he has to face the reality of the another person he trusts making terrible decisions or even his own choices landing him in a field of snow and rabbits again, if he can help it he'd choose the easier option flat out. He also understands that most resolutions in life, especially of this magnitude come with an intense compromise. I give you this, you give me that. If Reinhard promises to find another solution, Subaru will swear to take it more seriously. To help find a way for Reinhard to live peacefully with Divine Protections, not cursed to be beholden to them.

"What you said before... about seeing this plenty of times... does this happen too?" Subaru's breath comes out shaky. He never thought he'd be in this predicament. Half talking about their close proximity, and the premonition Reinhard spoke of. "If so then... do you know what happens next? 'Cause I'm honestly not prepared, you can watch so many videos and the pressure is still on."

[hide-and-seekrets]

[hide-and-seekrets]

[fallesto]

@dernarrleid 

[returnbymori]

"You—" Subaru starts to say but nothing comes. He stares at Reinhard, eyes hardening with every second as the words replay over and over. Of course he would know, it doesn't make sense because all the pieces aren't there but, if someone was to know it would be Reinhard. He understands the weight on his chest but Subaru isn't able to understand it strictly from a knight's perspective. After all from the beginning he's been rather ordinary and to assume he could even graze the heights of which the other man's abilities and troubles stand is childish at best. He says it's never been easy, though with all that in mind, Subaru still doesn't believe him.

"Friendship isn't a luxury! It's between two people who want to support each other, who want to be close together. You don't need anything fancy, or, or some big show of it." Subaru's hands run through his hair, ruffling the strands that were already slicked back from that morning. He reminds hearing Reinhard was coming and immediately panicked at the thought of being seen in his normal bedhead and unwashed tracksuit. The same hands reach out to grab Reinhard's face, squishy his cheeks between them to hold his gaze steady. Like the stars in the night sky, the dim light flickers in a sea of blue and Subaru's almost powerless to stop himself. Almost. He can feel goosebumps on his arm and at his neck. Why am I so nervous? He yanks the man forward, noses almost touching as he speaks.

"If you know about it then why haven't you said anything? You were gonna pal around with me until the inevitable? If you've seen me die then you know it doesn't bother me—being your friend, it doesn't bother me at all." Subaru lets the words hang in the air, afraid that if he moves he'll do something impossibly stupid like kiss him.

Maybe it's none of the things culminating into this encounter that makes Subaru follow through. He surges forward the last few inches of space between their lips and takes. A pinch of regret for having his first kiss with someone he's not certain has these feelings but it's better to do it now than regret not doing so later. Should they become the sort of enemies to maim and kill each other, then Subaru will take his moment to truly enjoy they have. The sword, long forgotten by him, still serves as a reminder of this conversation—of their fated duel, as Reinhard may put it. But it's okay, Subaru thinks, even if he thinks that's how it ends, the guy's so sincere.

"I already said I'd keep the people I care about safe, but for you... I'll never fight with you—er, at least not enough to warrant that." Subaru head nods to the sword. He nudges Reinhard back to jump off the box and dust himself off. It's not how he imagined the night going but these things take a lot longer to work through, he knows if he confessed then and there all hope would be lost before he even had the chance to process whatever happened. "You know, I—I have a serious promise-breaking streak according to Ram, but what does she know? So I won't say it won't ever happen. But if it ever comes to that... we have to at least try to find another way."

[returnbymori]

Wanted to see what Suba-chan would look like in our verse xD (she's taller because heels and I'd imagine he have her on a platform because she's the trophy wife) @fallesto

[returnbymori]

BEHOLD AN UNAVOIDABLE INQUIRY: @fallesto Would you still love me, if I were a pig? (dinner date gone wrong: Regulus)

Subaru nearly chokes on her vegetables, forcing the unchewed bite down her throat upon hearing his question. Her fork, the one that fell from her hand and clattered to the ground was immediately scoped up by one of the other wives who were on maid duty for dinner. She'd already undergone another redo from a (major) malfunction of the brain, caused by his not so helpful advice regarding earth dragon riding. She didn't think another show of his strength was necessary. But he makes it difficult to take him seriously sometimes and this is the price she has to pay as his wife, she thinks. How anyone could manage this willing she has no clue. It's not a terrible question all things considered. In her world they're so innocuous, Subaru would have jumped at the opportunity to do the same with Reinhard or Emilia but couldn't of course because of her station next to her husband, reluctant on her end as it may be.

"I don't know," Subaru answers wavering. Pigs are disgusting and filthy, at the first thought it's normal to say absolutely not. At a second glance, some are cute. The ones you can keep as pets are especially so until they get bigger and cause enough trouble. She thinks Regulus might have been the same way—a younger, more innocent little boy who hadn't undergone the sort of trials that make whoever she's cowering under. Who's giving her the most undiscernible expression. She thought everything was perfect, right up to this where he asks her an impossible question. The candlelight is nice, the food is even better, her clothes make her look more mature but not enough to make her lose that cute charm of a young wife. Even her demeanor was warming up to the man enough that maybe after... she was hoping for something more, possibly? Whatever mixed feelings were now leaning to the far side of god no.

"Where I'm from, like, a super small village by the way," Subaru adds to trial away from the fact that she's actually from Reiwa era Japan and not Kararagi, the middle kingdom turned Japanese-inspired fusion city. "Some pigs are kept as pets. When they're infants they have tiny legs and make cute noises. You give them buttermilk bathes and pretty much act like tiny dogs before you eventually have to— you know. If you suddenly became one... I'd love you for as long as you're cute."

[returnbymori]

Subaru thought mildly. Friend? With the stables being darker than the moon outside, the light didn't quite reach them enough for Subaru to see anything other than Reinhard's face. The determination in those eyes—he doesn't need the light for that. He can feel it so strongly his brain must be mapping his expression by memory. It's not something Subaru has thought about, but he knows the deeper is gets entangled with the witch of Greed, of Envy... the more he tries to help Emilia, the more knowledge he gains about his purpose. Reinhard seems charged by a sense of duty, though maybe he's more in tine with his destiny—more accepting of it than Subaru. He doesn't know why he's here, why he was chosen, why there are manifestations of sins or if there are even angels to counteract their presence. Reinhard would one them, Subaru thinks, if they existed.

No, if Reinhard is here they definitely do. "If we have to make them, how can they be impossible?" It slips from his lips without his say so, but the hands that were around him were now in fists, knuckles grazing over the wooden box while he fidgets. The thought crosses his mind randomly, that he's never seen Reinhard outside of his uniform. What would he wear? Subaru can see him in something flashy, but he could also see something woefully plain. Does that even matter if what Reinhard says is true? He looks down to the sword and wonders if there are other ways to deal with this path to the inevitable. If he has to fight with Reinhard, then it's natural to assume one of them would... even Subaru can tell death for him in that battle would be permanent. He doesn't know how to follow up, so he remains honest. "I don't want to hurt you. If we have to fight—if it's my friend, I won't hurt them no matter what!"

He cares about the safety of the kingdom, he'd be insane not to if he plans to follow Emilia to be the queen. But if that happens—he wants Reinhard to be there too. Subaru meets his eyes again reluctantly, lips quivering, unsure. "Is it that easy for you to do the same?"

[dernarrleid]

I'm back :D I gotta spark my creativity back so like this if you want a sketch of your character. I'll treat it like a commission so please feel free to let me know of any specificities!

[returnbymori]

BEHOLD AN UNAVOIDABLE INQUIRY: @fallesto Would you still love me, Would you still love me, Would you still love me? (Satella)

A frost coated his heart with every mutter from the woman. Her silver hair and purpled eyes made her nearly irresistible. After all most of her traits—the ones of that witch as well— were the same. They pulled him in and threatened to freeze him in an icy world, frozen and powerless to their respective vision. His type would kill him in this universe, Subaru thinks grimly, it wasn't so obvious in his own life back then where they amounted to nice collectibles on his dresser.

His fingers tap against the wooden table in the same sanctuary setting; the empty sky now eerie with the words lingering about. Suffocating. He could stop his leg from shaking, wondering just what picture the two made, sitting and drinking shoddily made tea while the two housed polar opposite feelings. He had to give her credit, it's almost endearing to see someone express their devotion in the face of an absolute rejection.

"Stop that," Subaru snaps. He levels the woman with a glare, eye sharpened with an edge to cut steel. Lips pursed with the threat of unsavory words. Like a curse, his words fall and take root. "I wouldn't love you even if this damn country blew itself to bits. You did this to me, you—" I love you, I love you, I love you. His tongue suddenly feels too big for his mouth, struggling to comprehend what the witch was saying. Before it had seemed like he finally had control of himself. His last death was fickle, sure, a sudden trip over the cliff, nothing serious—nothing compared to the rabbits, god. But it didn't take, his conscious. This unexplained attraction, this heavy warmth in his chest grew, as if even in the garden Satella casted a spell.

[returnbymori]

"I think if I stay it could be good for me, for a while at least." Subaru took note of how peaceful the area was despite the riffraff. He took in the forest, the foliage and how close they were to the ocean. Enough to catch the breeze and salty area every few minutes. The cabin didn't need any air conditioning like the manor in the summer, and it seemed like if he had the energy and mobility to properly clean it wouldn't be so bad. Sure there's probably mold and rotten wood, yet it's not as if he can't withstand the less than optimal condition. He's died plenty of times to know he shouldn't be picky about his winnings. It's just, when examining his scenario, how he left things with Reinhard that day... is this not what he deserves?

"The world can be a pain..." Subaru says, trailing off. "It's not really ideal for people like us." He chuckles, gesturing with his hands toward her work on is bandages. With a couple fingers, he glides over the linen, tapping at it in a way that suggest he's contemplating. For him that sentiment would be true if not for his year foray into knighthood and recent cowardice. "People like you," he corrected. How many times would he have to make a fool of himself? Would he have to endanger the people around him—the old world wasn't this... It didn't reveal these flaws as much. It might be a failing of course but when he had to deal with school and insecurities only... when the world seemed dimly lit, everything felt lighter.

Subaru sniffed, if anything to desperately transition to something else. "How did you become a knight?" It doesn't appear as though she's lost the spark for being one, and while they have their days to roam as civilians, he doubts she's the type of linger away from her duties for long. "Or, maybe that's not right... are you still on duty technically? I've met some pretty... uh, divot guys you could say. I'm kind of one myself, er—these ones are probably better than me by a mile though." He mutters the end of the sentence, pride still torn by both Reinhard and Julius.

[pmamtraveller]

Jessica Cioffi - Bury My Body

[fallesto]

@returnbymori

[dernarrleid]

I just moved (the majority of my stuff) to a new apartment, so replies will come and the ask queue will get started soon! surprise under the cut

[returnbymori]

"I'm not expecting them to," Subaru says defiantly. "I know when the time comes they'll be... well, useless." She says it matter of factly, as there is no way to soften the blow. They don't have the same drive, the same willingness to leave this place that Subaru has. What's more is the ability she's been gifted affords her a confidence boost many could only hope to acquire in their final moments. On all accounts, her mental state will be altered by spending so much time with Regulus; so much times trying to seem like the perfect wife. It disturbs the core of her being when she realizes some of what she feels... is excitement?

Subaru fists the handle of the fork, glaring at him with the intent to stab the fork through his mouth. Of course it wouldn't work. Nothing has as of late, but she can only have the sweet moment of thinking it would. She removes the utensil instead, stabbing through the slice of cake and brings it to her own lips. All pretext of a shy wife gone, licking at the sweet, soft icing covered pastry as if it were a well deserved prize. Despite the entire event being more a sham, forced spectacle than a true union. He doesn't taste like anything—if he could over power the burst of sugar on her tongue, he'd be something god awful. That much ego and absolute madness would poison anyone; there has to be something on his person keeping him alive. It not going to be easy deducing what either when every attempt thus far ends so damn quickly.

She stands to follow. Her hands come up to either arm, crossing them under her breasts. They lift within the silk, rosy and soft against the harden expression she dawns. "I'm not you." Subaru scoffs. "I don't want a castle full of women who share a man I'm supposed to be in love with. What kind of bullshi—situation do you think that this?" The word was caught, not in time to mask it but at least to show the effort of being demure. She raises an eyebrow, indignant at the mention of greed. He must be like the witch after all. "Couldn't you have been Minerva's Archbishop? Actually, never mind, she's super cute when she's angry but you...you'll definitely get scarier. Even a kid you would be terrifying." Subaru shutters at the thought.