mysterious as the dark side of the moon

[soysaucemoon]

I also really loved the video aspect because often you don’t really get to get a snapshot into what a therapist is like before you meet them in flesh for the first time, and if the fit isn’t right, it’s a full hour session of discomfort.

https://medium.com/the-brain-is-a-noodle/why-i-ended-my-talkspace-online-therapy-subscription-3b9c890688d5

[soysaucemoon]

Let me describe what the marketing was. When you end a subscription, you go through an exit survey which suggests: Pausing the subscription instead of ending it Switching a therapist to find a better match Getting a discount If you go through and still decide to end the subscription, you get another email a few days before your subscription actually ends with a final prompt to consider going back to the service with a discount code. I fell for every step of this marketing.

https://medium.com/the-brain-is-a-noodle/why-i-ended-my-talkspace-online-therapy-subscription-3b9c890688d5

[soysaucemoon]

We’re taught that being happy because of material goods is shallow and mute that feeling of joy when we have any sort of positive relationship with an object. We are afraid that we will build a life where we solely derive joy from things, and not people or experiences.

https://medium.com/the-brain-is-a-noodle/three-unconventional-things-i-learned-from-marie-kondo-4c28a263a439

[soysaucemoon]

I am protecting my local Song Hwas, Ik Joons, Jung Wons, Joon Wan and Seok Hyungs. The doctors who work tirelessly to keep us safe, who sacrifice so much of their sleep and time so that we get access to healthcare.

https://medium.com/the-brain-is-a-noodle/reasons-why-hospital-playlist-is-a-good-post-work-day-show-e916bb19a79f

[soysaucemoon]

This is such a genius concept that I adapted it with my daily/weekly scheduling. Instead of scheduling on the go (i.e., replying instantly to emails and giving people the first available slot), I leave all non-urgent scheduling decisions to the end of the day.

https://medium.com/the-brain-is-a-noodle/three-unconventional-things-i-learned-from-marie-kondo-4c28a263a439

[soysaucemoon]

For me: I internalized my immigrant parents’ way of showing love. They never apologized, they never praised, but if you were on good behaviour maybe you’ll get an extra chicken wing at dinner. I associated gift-giving as a way to show appreciation when words seemed empty. (Unfortunately, I also associated food as a coping strategy for any kind of negative emotion, but that’s another story, for another day).

https://medium.com/the-brain-is-a-noodle/different-metrics-same-values-managing-conflicts-with-your-partner-fda42fa59d08

[soysaucemoon]

One of the biggest pet peeves I have are people who offer to help but cannot deliver. This can sound really entitled dependent on what your personality is and whether you trust other people, so please bear with me as I try to explain.

https://medium.com/eggsisting/to-people-who-offer-to-help-but-cannot-deliver-b637712af14b

[soysaucemoon]

I relearned the pure meaning of joy, what it looks like and feels like in my body, in relation to what I own. I adapted my schedule using this life hack: gather everything into one place and make better-informed decisions from there. I became more conscious about my internal battle between emotional reasoning, and long-term/short-term considerations for purchasing new items.

https://medium.com/the-brain-is-a-noodle/three-unconventional-things-i-learned-from-marie-kondo-4c28a263a439

[soysaucemoon]

Seeing that timer ticking down from 25 minutes helps me shift back to the task at hand knowing that the timer has already started, rather than waiting for me to initiate the next cycle of work.

https://medium.com/the-brain-is-a-noodle/harnessing-the-power-of-autoplay-for-productivity-da0079ea1d5

[soysaucemoon]

I was honestly quite curious about what that would look like and tried it out. As context, I have never written professionally other than for scientific journals, and that is a long arduous process.

https://medium.com/the-brain-is-a-noodle/its-difficult-to-write-daily-for-medium-and-thats-okay-3d01aaa6bd56

[soysaucemoon]

What I learned is that therapists lack cultural competency regardless of platform and this lack of training is part of a bigger problem.

https://medium.com/the-brain-is-a-noodle/why-i-ended-my-talkspace-online-therapy-subscription-3b9c890688d5

[soysaucemoon]

The five love languages are ways that people like to receive or show affection in relationships, including: Words of Affirmation Physical Touch Receiving gifts Quality Time Acts of Service

https://medium.com/the-brain-is-a-noodle/different-metrics-same-values-managing-conflicts-with-your-partner-fda42fa59d08

[soysaucemoon]

When pottery breaks, it can be fixed; some even say the final product’s beauty far outweighs the original. Held together, with gold highlighting these pottery scars. Something from nothing, was a story that followed me like the blanket that followed the boy, fixed and mended, growing from a blanket, to a hat, to a button, growing together. I value this mindset.

https://medium.com/the-brain-is-a-noodle/kintsugi-2e112b646b8c

[soysaucemoon]

I was desperate for therapy. I was managing ongoing abuse and graduate school stress and fam, can I just repeat, I was desperate for therapy.

https://medium.com/the-brain-is-a-noodle/why-i-ended-my-talkspace-online-therapy-subscription-3b9c890688d5

[soysaucemoon]

Friend me and automatic me are such different people, honestly, but they are both me. When I’m basking in the rejection though, automatic me is prominent and friend me is nowhere to be found. There’s no one in my headspace to stand up for myself when I am my own worst bully.

https://medium.com/the-brain-is-a-noodle/how-do-you-deal-with-manuscript-rejection-137c4d5c2d11

[soysaucemoon]

This means I can safely order a few staple ingredients in bulk (read: for cheap!) knowing that I’m not subscribing to 10lbs of an ingredient I will only use once (1) in the next 2 years.

https://medium.com/the-brain-is-a-noodle/a-meal-prep-routine-thats-working-for-me-952ff05d5006

[soysaucemoon]

You’ve missed all of the F#s in the entire piece, and that’s how you’ve always played it. Missing a crucial note. You never knew the piece. You never knew the ending. And that’s how you’ve always stopped. Mid-piece. Your hands glide of the keyboard abruptly. The last page falls off. You pick it up, uniting it with the other pages, in that familiar rustle as you file it back into its hiding place. Some other time, some other day. Some other person.

https://medium.com/the-brain-is-a-noodle/f-233e52a87e07