The David Cruz III Interview
Tell me a little bit about your childhood.
I was born in Southern California, but when I was five I moved to the island of Guam. This is where my family is from originally. I spent most of my childhood and teenage years there. I often visited California for Christmas vacation where I spent a ton of time with my grandparents who I am very close with. I always knew that when I graduated high school I would move back, and thatās exactly what I did.
What are five things people don't know about you?
That I am the oldest of 5 kids
When I was a teenager I wanted so badly to be part of the Mickey Mouse club, so I begged my parents to enroll me in dance school.
I once met Meg Ryan while shopping one day in LA and told her I thought she was the greatest RomCom actress that ever lived. This was a big deal to me as I have watched every RomCom possible growing up and especially loved any movie with Meg. Those movies sparked my early interest in love and relationships.
I have an absolute weakness for baked goods.
I am a new Puppy Parent as of last October. I own a Westie named Oliver. Now the second love of my life.
Most of us got to fall in love with you on "The Millionaire Matchmaker" with Patti Stanger. How did that come about?
I was first introduced to Patti Stanger and company when they recruited me to meet one of their clients in Season 3. I went on a very memorable date that didnāt work out. Her team kept me in their data base and kept bringing me back for other clients. While that was all happening, I started a dating blog for an LA based Gay magazine. That blog led to the creation of my website Finding Cupid. When an opportunity came up to be part of her team, they called me and I interviewed. The rest is history.
You have a bright passion for matchmaking. What inspired you to go that route?
I have always felt that people need help in the world of dating. This became more obvious when the tech boom came along and all my friends were having bad dates and really struggling to connect with people on apps. I was even more concerned about the gay community. There was a ton of shit going down with the dating app explosion. There hasnāt been a day that someone hasnāt approached me begging for help. That desperation motivates me to this day. It tells me that there is a need for guidance and support.
Tell me about the very successful "Finding Cupid Radio."
After the success of the blog, I felt that there was so much more to talk about ā and more that that the blog just couldnāt give enough color and dimension to. I was approached by Universal Broadcasting Network in Hollywood to do a show based on my dating life and from there it expanded into interviewing dating experts, authors, celebrities and even the occasional friend. Which by the way... I love bringing friends on the show, Itās a great way to call them out on all their bad dating decisions. (Laughs)
What is the best part of that radio show and the worst?
The best part about it is the education I get. The world of dating, love and relationships is very layered and complex. They cannot be defined by any one answer or person. The show allows me to learn about these different layers. The worst part is getting up at 7am on a Sunday to do the show.
What is the best love connection you've ever done?
The best connection I have ever done was with a pretty jaded guy. He had been through it all. Dumped, was cheated on and was really in a dark place. He was someone that came to me as a last resort. I felt that if I failed him, he would not believe in love any more. Naturally I couldnāt let that happen.
I coached him, guided him and set him up on a few dates. I must note that all the while, he was fighting me tooth and nail on each choice I made for him. After a couple months, he met someone and eventually settled down again.
The best part was the day when he finally called me back and said⦠āYou were rightā (Laughs)
Let's talk about your new launch of Three Day Ruleās LGBTQ division. You have a pretty diverse group to help you. Let's talk about that.
Last year, a friend of mine introduced me to another matchmaker in LA, turns out she was the CEO of a company called "Three Day Rule." They are a young and wildly successful matchmaking company based here in LA. We met a few times and discussed the world of Gay matchmaking and how hard it has been for clients all over the US to find a solid support system for long term relationships. As we talked more and more, we both realized that we were passionate about making this a reality, so we just did it!
Last October, we launched the LGBTQ + division of "Three Day Rule." The division has Matchmakers, Dating Strategists and Experts who are all part of the LGBTQ Community. We are not stopping there either; we are planning on expanding to San Francisco, Chicago and Atlanta and New York. We want all the major cities covered ASAP.
What are 3 things that make a successful love connection according to your website, Finding Cupid?
3. Willingness to Try Something New
You're gorgeous. Are you single or taken?
Awe, thank you. Taken. I just got married recently... celebrated my one-year anniversary. My husband Jonathan and I, have been together for 6 years now. Crazy to think how fast time has flown.
You have been a featured columnist for some prominent magazines. Tell me more about that.
I am passionate about writing one subject and thatās Love. People have asked me to write about this for all different kinds of reasons. Whether its for advice, Valentineās Day, politics or love (and its cousins dating and relationships) is a perennial subject. Its been so cool to write for so many people. My top honor has been Huffington Post. When I was published there, I really felt validated as a voice.
With Gay Marriage being legal all over America, how has that changed the game for your company?
Oh man, it changed it in so many ways. First of all, dating now has a clear roadmap. 10 years ago, you (maybe) were dating with the hopes of being a ācommon lawā partner. There were couples that committed to the idea of marriage because it always felt risky. As a community, we were never sure if marriage would ever be a privilege we would enjoy, freely and legally. Dating felt disposable and few were really focused on an end game. Today, the flood gates have opened and now people everywhere are getting married and creating big lives together. Its amazing.
The greatest part is that marriage is now part of the dialog and conversation we have while dating. Itās a factor that can be a deal breaker or deal maker when looking for the perfect match. In our world, you can be the hottest guy on the block, but if you donāt want marriage or kids, you are cut from the line up. Thatās the coolest thing to see happening.
Your article on FindingCupid.com are adorable, relatable and spot on. What do you want your readers to get out of the website's content?
When you come to Finding Cupid, I want you to get the feeling that the writers have been through the same experiences that you are going through. So the advice is tailored for you. There not that many places where you can get a gay man giving gay dating advice. So often we digest the generic dating advice from our hetero resources, so Finding Cupid is meant to be the home for all daters, but with a massive focus on the LGBTQ community.
Additionally, we are not ashamed to write about our dating heartbreak, mistakes and fuck ups. We think that sharing our mistakes is the best way to help others. (Also, sometimes our mistakes are just funny.)
We're living in a time of extreme hatred and racism in America. As a man of color, how do you feel about it and what do you want people to know?
Every day I wake up and wonder āIs this the day I wake from this nightmare?ā Ā I mean, I honestly donāt know what our country has become. It makes me feel so sad and depressed some days.
But I have always believed that things break down, in order to build back up. And, while I acknowledge the hate, the intolerance and racism happening in our everyday lives, I also see the strength in the people, the new leaders and the new voices that are being created from all the negativity. There are many young people that are being motivated and inspired by Black Lives Matter and by The Womenās March. Young people who never had the opportunity to speak out, to get angry and to march. This is a beautiful time to be part of something and to fight for what is good. A beautiful time to be an activist.
I want people to know that no matter who you are, life is political and that you can find something to fight for. You donāt have to be gay or a person of color. There are many things that we as human beings can be activists for. Things that we should fight for and that are worth being a voice for. Itās our greatest privilege in life.
The biggest thing a gay kid faces is extreme bullying because of his sexual orientation. If you could sit with an audience of young kids of all sexual orientations, what would the message be?
Love. Plain and simple. We donāt talk about it in this context very often, but we should. I would teach them that love isnāt just for two people. Love is a driving force that shapes communities, inspires innovation and that fosters peace. Itās bigger than all of us and something that isnāt just a cheesy greeting card. Love will help us be better human beings. And, if we all have love for our fellow human beings, we will be kinder; a kinder world. But it starts with all of us.
What is your favorite pair of underwear & why?
Iām a boxer brief kinda guy. I like them low cut and in every color. Calvins specifically. They are comfortable, and you can go classic in white or go sexy in bold colors. (That sounds like an Ad) (Laughs)
What does 2018 have in store for us in regards to your amazing work?
Oh man, I am a workaholic so thatās a good question. I have been working on launching a new Gay wedding website. So thatās going to be my focus. Definitely working on doing more TV. But we will see. I want to make sure the project is right.
The Gay Community is still struggling with identity and politics along with discrimination at times inside the community. What do you think about that and what is your opinion?
Ever since I was a teenager, I have always felt a strong attraction to being an activist. If thereās a rally, Iām there. As a gay man, your life is political. You cannot help it, itās just a fact. From gay marriage to the government deciding on your rights, your voice counts; so being politically active is something I encourage every gay man to be. We are stronger in numbers, history has shown us this.
We are living in very uncertain times as we have a president and ruling party that does not align and support the community. In fact, its done more to erase and undo the support and legislation of any of the previous administrations, and that is major cause for concern. So now more than ever, its important to be politically active.
With identity, I think itās less about struggling, than it is an extreme growth phase or growing pains. The community is growing and expanding in new and beautiful ways. So I think itās more about getting to know the new LGBTQ community and learning how to bring it into the future.
When was the last time you cried sobbing?
A few times! Both with movies. I did a good āugly cryā when I watched this old movie called āItās My Partyā starring Eric Roberts as a gay man with AIDS who decided to take his life, but only after he threw one last party for him and his friends. TORE ME UP!
I also had the same cry with āCall Me By Your Nameā ā The ending. I think because it reminded me of my first Gay heartbreak.
Gay cinema these days is really getting me. Lol.
What makes you truly happy?
Spending time at home with my husband and my dog. We are both very busy people and often have hectic schedules, so when we have days off, you can usually find all three of us cuddling on the couch with a movie.
BRULER means Hot in French. What are five things that heat up your life?
2. A Good Cologne ā Especially if the scent makes you think of having wild passionate sex with someone.
3. A man in a bespoke suit
4. My husband when he comes home from the gym
Lastly, if you could be reborn into any animal, what would it be and why?
I have long had dreams of flying, so I think I would be a bird. Like a giant eagle. I like the idea that you can go anywhere and take in the planet from the sky.
Follow David On Social Media:
www.facebook.com/findingcupid
INTERVIEW BY: XAVII MATISSE Ā©