#im sorry everyone...

[wilfre-the-medical-bot]

(Hey guys

Sorry I've been gone for some time.

A lot has happened to me in a short period of time.

[Unspecified TW underneath-i think you would figure it out though])

(I trusted someone too much, and they betrayed me in a way that made me hate my body and self even more than ever.

I feel so sick when I get the flashbacks and nightmares.

I trusted them, and they hurt me in a way I never thought they would.

Karma went after them, though. Now I've lost 21 different people that I cared about this year.

Yes, even after what they did to me, I still cared.

I care.

I always care.

That's my problem.

I'm really hoping nothing else will happen because of this traumatic experience I went through.

I can't deal with that in my current mental and emotional condition.

I'm trying my best to get better, though. It's just been hard. I'm distracted from things I enjoy.

I'm so sorry, everyone. I went silent without any warning.

I shouldn't have done that. I shouldn't have worried you like that.

I'm sorry...

You deserve better than me...

I don't deserve your kindness...)

[blind0raven]

Hahaha... hiii...

I'm sorry what's about to come on New Years...

@the-lord-of-malevolence , @sebekzigvolt1 , @silver1217 I'm sorry, start blocking the kitchen NOW!!!

[arwcn]

today has just been a half-dozen speedboats screaming past each other in the night

[flockofdoves]

chiara make everyone unfollow me for flag posting for a whole day challenge

[wilfre-the-medical-bot]

(OOC: [vent, mentions of death - can be ignored]

Woke up this morning.

Already didn't want to do anything or get out of bed.

Decide to get up.

Get ready for the day and go about my morning tasks.

Seems like any old day.

Except...

Something's wrong.

It's quiet.

Too quiet.

More specifically...

Someone's too quiet.

I go to find them.

Opening the door, I see them...

Stiff...

Cold...

Motionless...

Gone...

I held them close as tears fell down my face.

But no one notices at first.

I couldn't let out an audible sob.

So at first, no one came to help.

They were gone.

Someone I cared so much about.

Gone...

Slipped away through the night...

Taken away when I least expected...

My dear friend...

It didn't take long for anyone else to notice an absence.

I was pushed aside.

They were taken from my arms.

I was left alone...

Left behind...

I didn't have the strength to argue...

Almost couldn't move.

But...

I have to get up.

Have to continue on my day.

No one around me will know what has happened.

I'm not eating.

I just can't.

I don't even want to talk to anyone.

It's not like anyone will bat an eye.

That's already how I am...

It's all too much...

Death keeps following me...

But I'm never the one taken.

It should have been me.

They didn't deserve this...

It should have been me.

It

Should

Have

Been

Me.

I can't do this anymore.

[leinbow]

i kinda forgot i have an ask blog

[combusteen]

me: considerate, nice, good, caring, considerate.

half my characters: rotten. monstrous. mean.

[commiegoth]

Me: All cop shows are propaganda.

Also me: *is almost always watching at least one detective show*