I’m Not Ok (I Promise) @trashbargle - Tumblr Blog

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wadefeltonism-deactivated202106

rb if you’d wipe all pedophiles off this earth

mohawkmama

It’s sad that there are only 13k notes on this..m

thiccdaddy-mbaku

put this on all 3 of my blogs

traumabell

thetruamatrilogy

the fact that not everyone’s mom is abusive is fucking wild to me

unwelcome-ozian

suckyloser

I’ll keep it there for when you need to hurt me again

motivatemycollegelife

Sometimes I get so mad at myself like.. I have so much potential and I don’t put it to use, I could achieve so many things but instead I procrastinate and waste my time in things that don’t matter. I could throw my phone away and lock myself in my house with my books but it wouldn’t change anything. It’s all in my head, I’m my fucking limit and I don’t know how to cross it. I’m stopping myself and I don’t know what to do to change that…

sparklecorpse-deactivated201906

i dont care if u never listen to me ever again just let me be ur internet dad for just one second: dont start cutting yourselves please ever

sparklecorpse-deactivated201906

ok im gonna reblog this again bc i want more ppl to see it?? ive compiled a (by no means complete) list of the things u can expect if u start:

- u cant stop. its a legitimate addiction. there is no ‘seeing what its like’. its soso hard to stop it and believe me, because that was me. i thought i would sate my curiosity but all i did was make my life miserable - everything can become a trigger. someone carved things in a table?? trigger. u get a scratch by accident?? trigger. see something sharp?? yup. - the scars dont go away and if people see them (and no matter how hard you try, people will see them) they get this awful fucking look on their face like a mixture of disgust and horror and pity - u have to sit through people making shitty fucking jokes and calling people like you (real, struggling people like you) edgy emos looking for attention and it makes you feel sick but you have to sit there silently - in fact, any conversation about self harm becomes thoroughly uncomfortable because they’ll talk about it like no one in the room has ever gone through it (or, if they know, they’ll glance at you out the corner of their eye when they think you cant see) - any emotion can give you the urges- not just negative. ur body associates the happy feeling with the pain so ur brain is like ‘????? u cant have one without the other??’ - it can have been years. years. you can have stopped and got better and you’ll still feel the urge to hurt yourself and it makes you feel like you haven’t improved at all and you’re still fourteen and hating yourself - (maybe this is just me) but some part of you misses it?? you stopped and you know its horrific but its so difficult to get rid of your blades or whatever you use because you feel so weirdly attached to these things that are so awful and you dont even know why

god damn i just want yall to understand that you dont have to hurt yourself ever, okay?? just. don’t. trust me.

prismpom-moved

I will reblog this every single day.

matthewswartz-deactivated201908

Please don’t become like me, it’s an actual addiction at this point

livinadidlife

unwelcome-ozian

Trauma Informed- The Trauma Toolkit

hopelesssborderline

cptsdgooglesearches

Why does everyone love my abuser

yourbigsisnissi

Before you get mad at your partner for not doing what you expect them to do, Stop and ask yourself “have I ever communicated to them that I have this expectation?” If you have not, it’s unfair to expect them to read your mind.

So many arguments are saved by just opening your mouth and saying “hey hun, in the future can you….” Whether its articulating how you like to be loved, supported, or communicated with, you have to open your mouth. Your soul mate (IMO) isn’t the person that just always knows what you need when you need it without you telling them. Your soul mate is the person who hears your needs and thinks “I have no problem doing that because I love this person with my whole heart”

So check your attitude and open your mouth. Closed mouths don’t get fed.

furiousgoldfish

A normal person will back off as soon as they’ve been given a sign that they’re causing pain to someone, but for abusers, that’s precisely when they plunge on and proceed to cast even more damage. Signs of pain for them are signs of encouragement to procceed, to them it means victim can no longer defend themselves or do anything but take damage. “It safe to keep hurting them, they can’t fight back” is what abusers see when you’re signaling for them to stop hurting you, that you’re not okay. That is not humane behaviour, nor is it behaviour of a person who cares about you, this is predatory, sadistic with the end goal of torture of another. And following that goal, they’re pretending that absolutely anything is a good enough excuse to cause pain, they’ll act as if winning an argument gives them permission to torture you, as if something about your behaviour or appearance or connection to them is an invitation for them to torture you. None of this is the case, every human being has full rights to exist, behave as they wish, look whatever they look like, lose thousands of arguments, and to not be tortured for any of that.

On top of that, abusers try to convince you that you’re just like them, that you would in every situation do exactly what they would, as anyone would. They’re trying to convince you that their behaviour is nothing different from anyone else’s, that it’s a normal human trait. That you’re just playing a game in which, you are trying to hurt them as much as they’re trying to hurt you, and they’re just somehow “smarter about it” and “winning every time”.

It’s not true. They’ve already gone over and beyond what you would ever do to another human being. It’s useless to play pretend “if roles were reversed” because they’re not, and they never will be, and they’re using the role they’re in right now to abuse you, and will keep doing so for as long as they live. You have to prove over and over again that you would do none of the things they do to you, not even in revenge after they already do it to you, not even as a defense method, not even to show them what it does to a person to be treated that way. Yet you have to listen to them convincing you that you do all those things, that your most feeble attempts of self defense and redeeming yourself is worse than their blatant torture of you. And they in the meantime, don’t stop at anything and use techniques of torture used for war prisoners, and you’re not allowed to even call them out. You’re not allowed to call them torturers. You have to look beyond that and imagine there’s some sort of “human nature” in their manipulations and lies. You don’t have to consider abusers human. Humanity isn’t something that conveniently appears when someone is in danger of being proclaimed an abusive monster. It’s not a shield. They are wrong to use it that way.

gahdamnpunk

Why is this even a question? How is your child meant to learn to apologize when you don’t do it yourself as a parent?

yourejustanotherversionofme

This is actually a really important factor in how I establish healthy, trusting relationships with kiddos at work. I am a human and therefore make mistakes, which children will catch and call me out for, because children are information sponges with no verbal filters.

When a kid says, “but miss tommy, i thought you said we’re not supposed to do that,” I answer, “You’re right. I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have done that. I won’t do it again.” It could be something small, maybe a kid sees me biting my nails, or maybe I grabbed a kid by the arm who was about to collide with something solid but I grabbed too hard. Whatever it is, it’s important to

acknowledge the mistake,

apologize to the kid,

and verbalize a plan to correct it.

Not only does this model HOW to make an effective apology, but it establishes trust on many levels. The children who witness the exchange now know that:

I will be honest with them even if it does not serve my ego,

I care about their feelings,

and I am taking their needs seriously.

Apologize to your kids when you mess up! It won’t diminish your authority as their grown-up, it shows that you respect that authority!

theoriginalblackbarbie

This is one thing emotionally abusive parents are known for. Holding power over accountability and they wonder why their children don’t want to be around when they get older.