@unemployedcherub - Tumblr Blog

diane-nguyen-watches-cartoons-d

autistic power couple

siir-poesia

maestrosigma

excellent names on the enemy team tonight

artsyarrowl

Cinderella marries the Prince, part 1/2

artsyarrowl

Part 2/2

This was a short story originally written by @batneko ! You can read the original post here: https://batneko.tumblr.com/post/171036276147/cinderella-marries-the-prince-and-its-fine-the

Thank you for reading ☺️

cinderella marries the prince and it's... fine. The prince is great! They're in love, he's very sweet and passionate, writing her poems and

everythingfox

A talented boi

(via)

sosuperawesome

Camille Fourcade on Instagram

cosmicallyavg

the gasp i gusped when i just opened one of my words with friends games

cosmicallyavg

it would have been 69 points too this is a hate crime

fruitpilled-peachcel

where's that photo of that shepherd dog being comforted by one of the sheep he guards after saving them from a wolf attack

fruitpilled-peachcel

love and gratefulness and kindness on planet earth

first-sight-and-second-thoughts

I would just like to say, as people in the notes are pointing out, that the blood is the wolf's. The dog is wearing a spiked collar to protect their neck from the attacks.

sosuperawesome

Camille Fourcade on Instagram

animentality

quasi-normalcy

“Haha, isn’t that cute. Now, photo time is over; we need you to reach into the machinery with your little child hands, boy, something’s clogging the gears.”

sosuperawesome

Camille Fourcade on Instagram

mclennonyaoi

you ever know someone and you think “god i love you. i wish we could’ve known eachother when we were carefree and 11. i wish we could’ve played together as kids”

skeletorishot

click here to read more

more

cpunkhobie

sosuperawesome

mistral_ on Instagram

azzandra

Fic idea I was struck with the other day and keep thinking about: a Vulcan adopts a cat.

azzandra

Still thinking about this, even though I’m not writing the fic!

This Vulcan, I’m calling her T’Pen, goes to a shelter and gets a cat, and the shelter employees are like, a bit weirded out? But obviously they’re going to give her a cat, I mean, she’s a Vulcan, she’s Super Responsible, she takes all the pamphlets and listens attentively to all the advice the shelter employees give her, even though it is obvious she researched a lot on her own.

Then T’Pen asks the shelter folks what she should name the cat and runs into That Thing Humans Do Where They Confound a Vulcan With Their Weird Ways

Shelter Employee 1: oh, you can name a cat anything! That’s what’s great! People names, common nouns, whole phrases.

Shelter Employee 2: yeah, nothing sounds weird on a cat. Everything from Chad to Cupboard is fair game.

SE 1: yeah, I mean, you can’t call a dog Chad, that would be weird

SE 2: I wouldn’t fuckin’ trust anyone who named their dog Chad

SE 1: oh word

T’Pen:….

T’Pen: ….fascinating.

azzandra

Later, in the interest of furthering her anthropological study of Earth, T’Pen has a houseparty and she invites her coworkers, many of whom are human, but others which are aliens, and are fascinated by T’Pen’s cat

Vulcan Co-worker: T’Pen, what have you named this small Earth feline?

T’Pen: I have named him Marmalade.

Vucan co-worker: Is that not the name of a type of Terran fruit preserve? I do not understand the logic behind this choice.

T’Pen: the logic is self-evident to a human.

Human Co-worker: T’Pen, omg, you have a cat! What’s his name?

T’Pen: thank you for your inquiry. His name is Marmalade

Human Co-worker: oooh! yeah, that makes sense, because he’s orange and sweet! lmao, great name

Vulcan Co-worker: …

Vulcan Co-worker: ….fascinating

bartfargo

Human: So, how’s Marmalade?

T’Pen: He has the peculiar habit of walking on my workstation.

Human: Aggravating, isn’t it?

T’Pen: We Vulcans do not feel human emotions. However, I would prefer it if Marmalade stayed off my workstation, particularly when I am working.

Human: Get a box.

T’Pen: Murdering Marmalade seems an overreaction.

Human: No, you need a box with interior dimensions approximately the same as Marmalade’s body, and set it on the floor next to your workstation. Marmalade will sit in the box.

T’Pen: Why do you believe that this will work for Marmalade?

Human: We don’t know. It’s just something cats do. If he fits, he sits.

T’Pen: … Fascinating.

bartfargo

Vulcan Commander: T’Pen, you are posting videos of your cat. Explain.

T’pen: My colleagues are amused and entertained by Marmalade’s interactions with his environment. I am amused and entertained by their reactions as reflected in the comments.

Vulcan Commander (reading): “U haz done me a startle”?

T’Pen: Some of them like to verbalize what they believe are Marmalade’s thought processes. He is a cat, so they imagine that he does not grasp human spelling and grammar.

Vulcan Commander: … Fascinating. As you were. (signs off)

T’Pen (returning to her meal): Now I can haz lunch.