AU College Fic. Farkle never figured out how Riley really felt about Lucas, so it never got out. Now she’s turning 21 and the gang decides to go to Las Vegas to celebrate. Sometimes what happens in Vegas doesn’t always stay in Vegas.
Rating: M
Pairing: Rucas
Word Count: 1,684
Cross-posted at ff.net
Soundtrack (although not at all organized and subject to edits)
A/N: I don’t think the epilogue is nearly as bad as I might have led you to believe (given some of the responses I’ve gotten since last night). I only meant that...well...it ends on a cliff.
Since this is the last part, I want to thank @gmwpluto again for letting me bore her with the details of the plot of this fic (and for the whipped cream gif haha!) and for the initial push back on the epilogue. You made me want to fight for this, and I think it’s what made it better. Thank you.
Riley sprinted across Columbia’s campus as if she knew exactly where to go. Truthfully, she only sort of knew where Lucas’s dorm was. Farkle had tried to tell her which building it was, but her sense of direction had never been her strong suit. She knew she could have waited until that night to see him, but that was just it. She couldn’t wait another minute. They had finished the last of their finals, and it was time to celebrate the completion of another semester of college.
Just when she thought that she would be forced to ask directions, she spotted him coming out of one of the surrounding buildings. Her grin widened as she willed her legs to pick up the pace in order to catch up with him. “Lucas,” she called out breathlessly.
Lucas turned around at the sound of his name. He would know that voice anywhere, but confusion etched across his features as he tried to look for her. Why was she here? Shouldn’t she be packing up her clothes for winter break? When he heard her call out his name a second time, he spun around just as she launched herself into his arms. He stumbled backward a few steps as he wrapped his arms around her.
Riley took a moment to breathe him in. One week. They had managed to go a week without seeing one another. She had always balked at the idea of those couples that couldn’t last a few days without seeing one another, but now that she was in the beginning stages of her very first relationship, she finally understood exactly what those couples went through. They had spent one glorious night together in Las Vegas, but she couldn’t help but to dream of the next time they could curl up against one another as they slept. She knew that they needed to take it slow, but that didn’t stop her heart from wanting to be near him all the time.
Lucas grinned as the brunette leaned back to kiss him. “Not that I’m not insanely happy to see you, but what are you doing here? Shouldn’t you be packing?”
“Maya and I moved out this morning,” she smiled as her eyes slowly wandered down to the envelopes in his hand. “Got mail?”
He chuckled. “Yeah. I haven’t checked it in a few weeks. Between the trip and finals, I’ve been too preoccupied to check it.”
“Anything good?”
He looked up at her. “I haven’t gone through all of it yet. I was pleasantly…distracted as I was thumbing through it all.”
“Well,” she smiled as she rocked back on her heels, “I’m here to help you pack up.”
“I’m not sure how much of a help you’re going to be.”
She tilted her head to the side. “What do you mean?”
He smirked as he wrapped his arms around her waist. “Because you are the perfect distraction.”
“So, this is your room,” Riley questioned as she stepped into the dorm room. She quickly noticed that his room was a lot bigger—maybe even twice the size of—the closet she shared with Maya. “This is so unfair.”
“What is,” he asked as he sat his backpack down on his computer chair and tossed the mail on top of his desk. He glanced around the room. It wasn’t anything special. Two twin beds. Two desks. One futon. One mini fridge. It seemed like a pretty standard dorm room to him.
“Well, first off, my dorm room is so small that Maya and I have to have bunk beds. You and your roommate are fortunate not to have to do that.”
He shrugged as a faint smile formed across his lips. “That’s what you get for not going to Columbia with me.”
Riley’s mouth fell open as she chuckled. “Oh, you’re so gonna pay for that one.” She slid her hands into the front pockets of her jeans. “So, what all do you need to grab?”
He smirked as he leaned against the door. “Why? Are you in a rush?”
She smiled. “Maybe I have something planned once we get your stuff from here to your parents’ place.”
He lifted his eyebrows in surprise. “Oh, really?” She had something planned tonight? Up until twenty minutes ago—when she launched herself into his arms—he wasn’t even sure that he would see her today. As he watched her raise her eyebrows to mimic him, he couldn’t believe that everything had worked out the way it did, and that he ended up with the girl of his dreams.
She nodded. “You aren’t the only one who is full of surprises, you know.”
He loved that smile. The way the corners of her lips turned up into a mischievous smile always made him yearn for her even more. She was always plotting or planning something. To know that he was fully part of that world now meant everything to him. As he walked toward her, he realized that couldn’t stand the space between them anymore. As soon as she was within arm’s reach, he snaked his arms around her waist as he lowered his lips to hers. “Oh, I definitely know that,” he murmured before he kissed her once more. “You were the one who wanted to play 21 minutes in heaven, after all.”
Riley’s lips formed a thin line as her cheeks reddened. When she heard him softly chuckle in response, she playfully pushed him back. “Go pack your bags, Friar, before I change my mind.”
“Oh, if you change your mind, I’m sure I can change it back,” he grinned wolfishly.
She rolled her eyes. “You think you’re so smooth, don’t you?”
“Not even remotely,” he laughed as he turned away from her and walked toward his closet.
Riley glanced around the room for a moment as she listened to him stuff some clothes into a duffel bag. She lightly patted the palms of her hands against her thighs as she slowly wandered around the room. She smiled as she looked at the handful of pictures Lucas had scattered throughout his side of the room. There were some of him in Texas—a few of him, Zay, Asher, and Dylan—and then there were some of his life in New York. She stopped as she looked at one picture in particular from their middle school graduation party. Riley smiled as she remembered one particular moment from that night: for one fleeting second, their fingers brushed against one another as they both reached for the same bag of chips. She remembered experiencing that little spark even then—back before she really knew what it meant. It seemed like another lifetime ago. As she glanced up at the closet door that her boyfriend was hidden behind, she knew that everything had happened the way it did for a reason. They weren’t ready back then, but she knew that they were now.
She bit the inside of her cheek while her fingers brushed against his desk as she slowly walked around it. A minor crash made her head snap up in the direction of the sound. “Are you ok in there?”
Lucas laughed. “Yeah. Yeah. Just knocked over some old books.”
She smiled as she glanced down at the desk where he had sat the mail down. Her smile slowly faded when she noticed a familiar insignia stamped on the upper left corner of an envelope that was mostly buried underneath a flyer for transfer student move in. She cut her eyes back to the closet before she turned back to his mail. She tucked a piece of hair behind her ear as she slid the envelope out from under the flyer.
Her hands shook as she lifted the envelope. Her breath caught in her throat as she read the return address underneath it: Texas A&M Office of Admissions. She closed her eyes as she desperately tried to remember how to breathe. When she opened her eyes, she could have sworn that the maroon label was taunting her. She knew that she didn’t need him to open it to know exactly what it was—an acceptance letter.
“Riley, did you hear what…” Lucas’s voice trailed off as he stepped out from behind the door. He frowned the minute he laid eyes on her. Even from where he stood, he could tell that all of the color had suddenly drained from her face. “Are you ok?” She didn’t acknowledge him at all as she continued to stare down at the envelope clutched in her hands. “Riley, what is it,” he asked as he quickly closed the space between them. When she still didn’t respond to him, he gently pulled the envelope from her grasp. He took one look at the return address before he cut his eyes back to her.
After a minute, which felt like an eternity for both of them, Riley slowly looked up at him. As their eyes met, she knew exactly where they would be a month from now. A rush of words quickly tumbled from his lips as he desperately tried to explain to her why he applied to transfer to Texas A&M for the spring semester and why none of that mattered now. She was his priority. She was what he wanted. He could get his education anywhere, and Columbia was a great school. He tried to explain to her that the reason why he applied in the first place was because he thought that was what she wanted. He knew that she was pulling away from him, and he thought that maybe it was time to get some space and move on. He never took a breath as he assured her that the trip to Las Vegas had changed everything. As he pleaded with her to forget that she ever saw it, Riley’s eyes slowly drifted back down to the envelope in his hands. His words began to blend together as her mind drifted back to something she had learned while they were in Las Vegas—the house always wins.
One month later...
A/N: Yeah, I don’t like doing two notes, but when I originally planned this ending, I had zero plans of continuing it. However, my brain likes to disagree with me quite often, and I have thought about doing a continuation. I do have a vague idea for it, but at the same time, I’ve done so so so many fics about him being in Texas and her being in NYC that I feel like it’s becoming a broken record. So, I’m not sure about the interest and I’m not sure if it’s something worth doing. That’s why I warned you about it.
AU College Fic. Farkle never figured out how Riley really felt about Lucas, so it never got out. Now she’s turning 21 and the gang decides to go to Las Vegas to celebrate. Sometimes what happens in Vegas doesn’t always stay in Vegas.
Rating: M
Pairing: Rucas
Word Count: 4,338
Cross-posted at ff.net
Soundtrack (although not at all organized and subject to edits)
Both of them were afraid to speak, to blink, to take a breath, for fear that it was just another bittersweet dream. How could this moment possibly be real when everything around them felt so perfect?
Lucas looked down at the girl who was curled up in his arms. His fingers traced circular patterns on her back as he tried to gather the courage to break the surreal aura of peace that enveloped them after what could only be described as the greatest moment of his life.
Riley Matthews loved him. The girl who had held his heart from the moment he first saw her on the subway eight years ago. The girl he had desperately tried to hold onto and, simultaneously, tried to forget because she told him to. The girl who made him believe he could be anyone he wanted to be, although ironically enough, he only ever wanted to be hers.
Was this his reality now? He was afraid to break the spell that seemed to have been cast over them. After years of pining for the woman in his arms, he had a hard time believing that his residency in purgatory had ended and that he was now free to dwell in paradise for as long as this beautiful goddess decreed.
When she snuggled even closer to him, he exhaled a shaky breath. As much as he wanted to lay there with her forever, he knew that eventually, someone had to speak. “That wasn’t quite how I imagined it,” he murmured before he kissed the top of her head. It wasn’t the smoothest way to pull them back down to earth, but he had to hear her speak. He had to know that she didn’t regret a single second of it.
Riley slowly opened her eyes as a lazy smile tugged at the corners of her lips. Hearing his voice for the first time after connecting to him on the deepest level possible set her mind at ease. For a few moments, she was content enough to bathe the afterglow of what they had shared with one another, but as the minutes began to tick by, she started to wonder if it had all been another dream and her cruel subconscious was trying to shove her back to reality. Hearing the sound of his voice vibrate against his chest reassured her that everything that had just transpired between them was real—and that fact made everything so much better. “Hmm? How did you imagine it?”
He chuckled as he slowly felt himself relax. She was real. This was real. It was finally over. The brick wall of misunderstanding had been thoroughly demolished, and if he had any say in the matter, it would never be reconstructed. “Well, I thought that we would have gone on a date first.”
Riley frowned as she lifted her head to look at him. “We’re doing this all out of order, aren’t we?”
He smiled as he tucked a piece of hair behind her ear. “We do what we do, remember?”
There it was again: the hair tuck. She had no idea if he was aware of how significant the seemingly insignificant gesture was. He had done it during some of her most vulnerable moments over the weekend, and every single time, it calmed the tidal wave of insecurity that threatened to wash over her. “Absolutely.” In middle school, ‘we do what we do’ had been their way of informing the entire school that they weren’t going to fit into some cookie cutter mold of who they should be. They were going to set their own rules for their lives, and they didn’t have to answer to those who didn’t understand the connection they shared. As she rested her head on his chest once more, she looked down at their tangled limbs. “You know, we didn’t exactly finish that conversation.”
He slowly ran his index finger down the length of her spine. “Oh?”
Riley shivered against his touch. For a foolish moment, she thought that she wouldn’t feel nearly as electrified whenever he brushed his fingers against her skin, but as she felt a trail of goose bumps pop up along her spine, she knew that, if anything, the sensitivity she felt under his touch had exponentially increased. “Yeah,” she answered as another ripple coursed through her.
Lucas frowned when he felt Riley’s body stiffen up beside him. A sense of dread filled him as his insecurities encroached on his otherwise serene thoughts. Had she finally come down from that high only to realize that it wasn’t what she wanted? Had she only gotten caught up in the moment? Was she suddenly regretting stepping foot into his room? “Do you…regret what we—“
“No,” she quickly interrupted as she leaned her head back to look at him. She never wanted him to think, not even for a moment, that she had any regrets about what they had done. If anything, she only regretted that it took them that long to get to this moment. “Lucas, I’ve waited a long time for you…to tell you the truth about how I felt…how I’ve always felt. I couldn’t…I couldn’t wait a second longer.” She sat up further as she leaned forward to place a soft kiss against his lips. “I feel like I could stay like this forever.”
The furrow in his eyebrows melted away as a smile slowly returned to his lips. “Me too,” he answered as he continued to trace patterns across her back.
“Unfortunately, I don’t think anyone is going to…” her words slowed as her eyes widened. She wasn’t sure how long she had been in his room, but she knew that it had to have been long enough to delay their plans for the night. “Dinner,” she gasped before she scrambled to get out of bed. As she looked around the room for her clothes, she began to panic. “I’m sure they’re all waiting for us.”
Lucas sat up as he reached for his phone on the nightstand. “Wait,” he called out to her as he read through a missed text from Zay. “They already left.”
Riley frowned as she slid her shorts back on. “They left?”
He nodded. “Zay said ‘don’t worry about it’ and ‘we’ll meet up with you guys in a few hours’.”
As Riley threw her shirt back over her head, she sat down at the end of the bed. “Do you think they know?” How was she going to explain everything to them when she wasn’t even sure what it meant?
Lucas chuckled as he sat his phone down. “They probably do.” As he turned back to her, another burst of insecurity flooded him. What if she didn’t want them to know? What if this meant something different to her than it did for him? “Is that a problem?”
“No,” she shook her head as she ran a hand through her tangled hair. “I mean Maya’s known for a few months now that I…I have feelings for you.”
“A few months?”
“Yeah,” she looked down at her hands. “She…sort of figured it out at Zay’s birthday thing.”
“You kept that from her for seven years?” He couldn’t hide the shock in his voice. He wasn’t sure what he was more surprised by—the fact that she kept it from him or the fact that she had kept it from Maya for that long.
Riley nodded as she looked back up at him. “It was almost as hard as keeping it from you.”
He sat up as he leaned forward to kiss her. They both had kept it from everyone they loved for years. Now that they were finally free, Lucas was determined to make her realize that telling him the truth was the best decision she had ever made. He slowly inhaled as he reached for one of her hands. He looked up at her as he interlaced her fingers with his. “You never have to worry about keeping anything from me…ok? I love you, Riley Matthews. Nothing is going to change that.” He smiled as he lifted her hand to his lips. He brushed his lips along her knuckles as a thought came to him. “You know, I think this might work out for the best.”
Riley bit the inside of her cheek. She knew that she could easily get used to this. He had treated her with nothing but reverence the moment they lowered their defenses. Every time their eyes met, he looked at her as if she were the only woman in the world. “What?”
“Well, we’re in Las Vegas. It’s your birthday and I’ve waited almost eight years to ask you out on another date. So,” he glanced at their hands before he looked back up at her, “Riley Matthews…will you let me take you out for your birthday dinner?”
Riley couldn’t keep the grin from her face. She had hoped that they might have been able to spend a little more time with one another before they met up with the others. Dinner together sounded wonderful. Calling it an actual date made it sound ten times better. “Absolutely.”
When she told him that she was going to get a shower, he really wanted to ask if she wanted some company. He wanted nothing more than to beg for the opportunity to lather up every square inch of her perfect form, but he somehow managed to restrain himself. He wanted to do this the right way. He wanted to show her that he really wasn’t the guy she thought he had been for so long. Yes, he told her the truth, but now, it was time to prove to her an even deeper truth—that he wanted every part of her, not just her body.
Riley was mildly surprised that he didn’t ask to join her. She thought about suggesting that they do their civic duty and conserve water by showering together, but she wasn’t sure if it would be too suggestive since they had only had one real conversation about how they felt about one another.
Even though that conversation led to the loss of her virginity, she knew that if they had showered together, they might not leave the room for the rest of the night. Besides, she knew that they needed to resume their earlier conversation. She still had some questions about a few things, and she knew that he had to have had some as well. She wanted to do this the right way. If that meant pausing any physical relationship while they closed the gap on seven years of miscommunication, then so be it. She could keep her hands off of him.
At least, she hoped she would be able to.
So, he showered in his bathroom and she showered in her bathroom. They both got dressed in their respective rooms, and met in the living room to go to dinner at the one place in the city Lucas had dreamt of taking her.
“Lucas, this is so beautiful,” Riley breathed as she looked around the restaurant. As soon as the group decided to go to Las Vegas, she knew that there was only one restaurant she really wanted to go to, and somehow, he knew. Somehow, he remembered her affinity for all things Parisian.
“It’s ok,” he agreed as he glanced around the restaurant. After his conversation with her at Zay’s birthday, he knew that he wanted to take her to the Eiffel Tower Restaurant for her birthday—even if it meant taking everyone else as well. Riley hadn’t quite made it to Europe yet, but he hoped that the restaurant would at least give her a taste of where she really wanted to travel. As his eyes landed on hers, he smiled. “It still pales in comparison though.”
She tiled her head to the side. “To what?” To the other restaurants they had dined at while here? Doubtful. The lighting, the music, and the view blew everywhere else out of the water.
“You.”
A small blush crept up on her cheeks as she turned away from him. Her eyes fell on the Bellagio Fountains as she tried to steady the rapid beating of her heart. “What a line,” she smirked.
He shrugged. “Not a line at all. Just the truth.”
She took a deep breath before she turned back to him. “Thank you.” They both exchanged shy smiles before they looked down at their menus. After their waiter came and took their order, Riley glanced out the window once more. “I think I like this view of the fountains more than the one last night. You know…we were so close to them last night, which was nice, but from this view, you can really see the whole thing.” She turned back to him. “Kinda makes you appreciate it more.”
He smiled. He thought she might enjoy the view of the fountains. Despite everything that happened last night, he knew that she seemed hypnotized by them. So, when he called the concierge to make the last minute reservation for him, Lucas pleaded for him to make sure they had the table with the best view of the Bellagio Fountains. “They are pretty hypnotic, aren’t they?”
Riley bit the inside of her cheek. She couldn’t be sure, but she had a feeling that he wasn’t talking about the fountains. “Can we talk? About what happened last night?”
“You can talk to me about anything, Riley.”
She opened her mouth to ask him about something that had been nagging at her ever since she left his room to get ready, but the moment she began to form the words, their waiter had returned with a bottle of wine. After he poured them each a glass, Riley and Lucas thanked him. After he left, Lucas held up his glass to her. “Happy Birthday, Riley.”
She smiled as she raised her glass to her lips. After she took a sip, she slowly sat the glass down. “This is too much, Lucas. I mean…last night was already just…too much and now this?” She slowly looked up at him. “I’m scared to know how much all of it cost.”
“Don’t worry about it,” he insisted. “I just want you to have a good birthday.” He sat back in his seat. “What did you want to ask me?”
She took a shaky breath. “A-After you left Hyde last night…where did you go?”
“I went back to the hotel…to one of the bars.” He sighed as he leaned forward in his seat. “I’m sorry for leaving like that. I just couldn’t see any possible positive outcome from saying what I did and how I did it. You didn’t want to talk about it while we were drunk and I kept pushing you. I’m sorry for that, Riley. I thought that if I left…it would save you the embarrassment of turning me down again.”
“I’m sorry about how I acted last night. I was…scared.”
He frowned. “Scared?”
“Scared that maybe it wasn’t real for you…that if we got together while we were drunk t-that y-y-you might regret it in the morning.” She sighed. “At the same time, I didn’t want you to run off with those girls…so I thought that…that maybe I could be enough…for one night anyway.” She scoffed as she tried to make sense of her drunken logic. “Seems like a really stupid idea now.”
“Riley, I need you to know that my feelings for you have always been there. There hasn’t been a day since we met that I didn’t love you.” He paused. “Even when I was with someone else, even as we drifted apart. I feel…terrible for getting into relationships with other girls when I knew that I wasn’t ready for it, but I was trying to move on. I was trying to do what you told me to. I thought the only way to really do that…and try to maintain our friendship…was to try to find someone else…but…I…I never could. If I’m being honest, I’m not sure I ever will.”
Riley let his words sink in as she took another sip of her wine. This entire time, she thought that he had moved on, when in reality, he was only trying to survive. “I tried too. You know…I met people…dated around…but I couldn’t…I never found anyone I wanted to really get to know…not like I did with you.”
Lucas ran his fingers down the stem of the wine glass as he forced himself to not look at her. “So…Asher?” He knew what they had said last night and what she said earlier about their kiss, but he had to hear it again. He had to know that it meant nothing.
“We’re friends. He and I both agreed on that one.”
He slowly exhaled. “And Steve?”
“He’s a guy in my English class. We’ve gone out a few times. He’s nice, but…”
He cut his eyes to her. “But?”
She bit her bottom lip as her eyes fell to the table. “But…he’s not you.” How could she make him understand that she was doing the exact same thing he was? “We went to a movie a few weeks ago…and I wasn’t really watching the movie because I kept thinking about the film series we went to freshman year and even though I felt completely awkward around you at the time…I still had so much fun. I mean…you even agreed to dress up with me. So, as I was on this date with someone else, I kept thinking that there was no way Steve would ever humor me like that and dress up for the occasion.” She chuckled softly. “Honestly, I don’t even think I’d ask him to. That was…sorta our thing, you know?” She looked back up at him. “What was your favorite movie from that series that we went to?”
“Breakfast at Tiffany’s,” he answered without missing a beat.
She furrowed her eyebrows. Out of all the movies they saw, Breakfast at Tiffany’s would be one of the last ones she’d ever guess. “Why? Is it because you spent half of the movie next to some stranger because you thought they were me?”
Lucas laughed. “No,” he answered as he reached for his glass of wine. “I guess it was because it gave me hope that if Holly and Paul could figure out a way to be together, then maybe…maybe we could too. They were friends first...had seen one another through so many highs and lows…I don’t know. It just made me think that one day…maybe…maybe it would work out with us.”
As Lucas sat his glass back down, he placed his hand on the table, palm up. “I know my track record isn’t good,” he began as she placed her hand in his. He took a deep breath before he continued, “But I know…beyond the shadow of a doubt…that it would be different with you. I know…I know that I’m asking you to take a huge leap of faith here…and that I probably should wait until we finish our second first date, but…would you consider being my girlfriend?”
Riley looked into his eyes for a long moment. “Yes,” she smiled. “I want to be with you, Lucas. Only you.”
Maya texted Riley as they were finishing up their meal. They were headed over to the casino at Caesar’s Palace and wanted to know if Riley and Lucas wanted to join them. As much as Riley wanted to spend the rest of the night with her newly minted boyfriend, she didn’t want to completely close herself off from spending her birthday with her friends. So, they agreed to meet up with Maya, Zay, and Farkle at Caesar’s Palace as a couple.
They walked in, hand in hand, determined to take the jokes and questions one at a time with grace and dignity. They knew that they deserved every jibe for what they had put their friends through on their path to figuring it all out.
As soon as Riley saw Maya, the brunette beamed. She was fairly certain that Maya’s eyes were about to pop out of her head.
Maya grabbed Zay’s arm as she stared at the interlaced fingers of two of her best friends. As a smile curled at the corners of her lips, she realized that she couldn’t possibly be any happier for them. She nearly screamed in delight when the couple finally reached them.
“Hey guys,” Lucas casually greeted as he made no attempt to hide the grin that had been plastered on his face ever since Riley agreed to be his girlfriend.
“Hey,” Maya smirked as she finally looked up at the pair. “Care to tell the entire class something?”
It took Farkle a moment, but eventually, he lowered his eyes to their clasped hands. “What’s going on?”
“Well,” Riley began as she turned to her boyfriend, “Lucas and I…we’re sort of…dating now.”
Zay glanced at Lucas as he raised his eyebrows. “Dating?”
He nodded as he looked at the trio in front of him. “Yeah. Is that…ok with everyone?”
“I swore to myself that I’d stop speaking to both of you if you weren’t dating by the end of this trip,” Maya confessed as she pulled her best friend into a hug.
“Yeah, I’m with Maya,” Zay agreed. “Especially after last night.”
Farkle shrugged. “I don’t know what happened last night, but it’s about time you two got together.”
Riley and Lucas turned to one another before they looked back at the genius. “What are you talking about, Farkle?”
“Oh come on. I see the way you two look at each other…the way you’ve always looked at one another. I knew it was only a matter of time. I thought it would’ve been before now, but…I knew when Lucas was asking about your dating life that it couldn’t possibly be too much longer.”
Riley raised her eyebrows as she looked at her boyfriend. “You were trying to get some information from Farkle?”
Lucas sighed as he closed his eyes. Embarrassment filled him as he glared at one of his best friends. “Thanks.”
Farkle laughed as he slapped Lucas on the back. “Anytime.”
Riley turned to Zay. “So, what are we playing?”
“Are you ready to test your blackjack skills?”
She cringed. “I don’t really remember everything you taught me last night.”
“Well, you have a pro for a boyfriend, so I’m sure you’ll be fine.”
Riley looked at Lucas. “You play blackjack?”
“And poker, and roulette, and craps,” Zay informed her. “Lucas taught me everything I know.”
“You like to gamble?” Her question wasn’t at all accusatory, but merely inquisitive. She had held him at arms length for so long that she didn’t realize until now that there was a lot about him she still needed to learn.
“Zay’s exaggerating.” He narrowed his eyes at his best friend. “Thanks for making it seem like a have a problem.”
“Nah, it’s only a problem if you lose,” Zay laughed. “Riley, Lucas and I go to poker tournaments on campus all the time. He’s racked up quite a little nest egg.”
Lucas sighed. Could they please talk about something—anything—else? She didn’t need to learn about all of his vices in one night. “It’s not that big of a deal.”
“Well, at least I’m in good hands, right,” Riley smiled. She could tell that Lucas was embarrassed by it, but she didn’t care. She knew that he would never gamble with anything he wasn’t prepared to lose.
“The key is in knowing that the house always wins,” Zay told her as the group walked toward one of the empty tables.
“The house always wins,” she repeated as she slid into one of the seats.
“Yeah,” Zay nodded as he sat next to her. “Well,” he smirked, “Unless you’re Lucas.”
“Ok…let’s stop yapping and start gambling,” Maya grinned as she watched the dealer shuffle the cards.
“I really thought I’d be good at it,” Maya grumbled as they walked back into the suite. “I read all of the books. I thought I was ready…that I knew what I was in for.” She pouted as she trudged into the living room.
“The house always wins,” Zay reminded her.
“Yeah, that’s really reassuring, Zay” she grumbled. “What about him,” she gestured to Lucas, “And him,” she pointed to Farkle. “Between both of them, I think they won every hand they played.”
Farkle laughed as he looked at Lucas. “Yeah, we did all right.”
Lucas shrugged despite the grin on his face. “It was a group effort. Besides,” he glanced at the brunette next to him, “I had luck on my side.”
Maya rolled her eyes. “I’m starting to think I liked you two more when you weren’t so nauseating.”
“I lost too,” Riley offered.
“Yeah, but you stopped after a few hands.” The blonde flopped down on one of the couches.
Riley shrugged. “I’m not a gambler, I guess.”
“I lost too,” Zay told the blonde as he sat down beside her. When she leaned her head on his shoulder, he smiled softly.
“Yeah, but you weren’t up $500, either,” she groaned. “I should have stopped. Why didn’t you guys tell me to stop?”
“We did,” Farkle said as he sat down on the other side of her. “We tried to tell you for the last hour to quit while you were still ahead.”
She sighed. “Well, I have definitely learned my lesson for next time.”
“Next time,” Lucas asked as he sat down on the arm of the couch across from them. “You know that we’re leaving in the morning, right?”
She nodded as she lifted her head up. “Yeah, but I’m definitely coming back. I’m not going to let Vegas get the last laugh.” She watched as Riley placed her arm around Lucas’s shoulders as she stood next to him. “Besides, I think it’s safe to say that we’re all winners. We all walked away with something.”
AU College Fic. Farkle never figured out how Riley really felt about Lucas, so it never got out. Now she’s turning 21 and the gang decides to go to Las Vegas to celebrate. Sometimes what happens in Vegas doesn’t always stay in Vegas.
Rating: M
Pairing: Rucas
Word Count: 3,626
Cross-posted at ff.net
Soundtrack (although not at all organized and subject to edits)
A/N: Please read the a/n because it might be the reason why this is the last chapter you’ll read.
Ok, so first off (and this will help explain what I did and why I did it), the chapter titles. I always had a vague idea about what I wanted to do for this fic. As I began to write it, I wanted to figure out exactly how long it was going to be. I knew that I wanted it to encompass a long weekend, so I knew it wouldn’t be super long, and I knew I wanted it to have some cool chapter titles to tie back to the overall Vegas vibe. I thought, at the time, that I wouldn’t be able to do 21 chapters, so instead, I came up with something better. Every chapter (minus chapter one), corresponds to a playing card nickname. The chapters have gone from Deuces (a nickname for the 2 card) all the way to the Ace card (Aces high, baby!). I only cheated slightly with chapter ten. It was originally called Dime, but I went with a ten higher card nickname (TT) because the name was perfect. A lot of the chapter titles dictated the course of the fic (an example is the hot tub moment in “The Devil’s Bedpost” or how “Time Travel” was comprised of a flashback). I wanted to challenge myself to stay in those sort of parameters, and honestly, I think that overall, the fic turned out better than I thought it would. Those nicknames really weaved a lot of the story.
Hopefully you’re still reading this because this is the whole point of me telling you about the chapter titles: I didn’t stop with the Ace card. There is an epilogue, which will be posted tomorrow (Saturday). It’s the “joker” card and the name of it is “Wildcard”, and trust me when I say that it’s called that for a reason. So, if you want this fic to be wrapped up nice and tidy, don’t read the epilogue. If you want to read the full ending I had envisioned for this story, then definitely read the A/N I’m going add before the epilogue begins.
This is the longest a/n I’ve ever done, but if you’re still reading this, thank you. Thank you for reading this fic, and for humoring me.
“I don’t know about you guys, but this has definitely been the best night here,” Lucas told the group as they lounged in the living room. “Just a few drinks. Some bowling, some pool…just us…all of us.”
“It’s definitely been more low key,” Farkle agreed. “So, what’s been your favorite part of the trip?”
Lucas briefly glanced at Riley. She looked like a vision as she was seated next to Maya on the loveseat. She seemed completely oblivious to the fact that his eyes were on her as she and Maya laughed at whatever they were talking about. He smiled softly as he looked back at Farkle. “Are you asking the group or just me?”
“Everyone,” he clarified as he glanced at the girls. “Because I figured with you and Riley it would be the obvious…you know…finally getting together.”
When Riley heard her name, she turned her attention to the guys’ conversation. She glanced at Lucas as his eyes fell to the ground. She couldn’t be certain, but he seemed a little sheepish as he looked away from her.
“You’re whipped already,” Zay teased as he caught the bashful look on his friend’s face. He had known Lucas for most of his life and had only seen him act like that twice—both times involved one Riley Matthews. He sipped on his drink as he tried to think about his favorite part of the trip. “Mine would probably be…watching Farkle drive the golf cart into the lake earlier today.”
Maya and Riley nearly exploded in laughter. “Wait,” Maya continued to laugh, “What?”
Zay grinned. “Oh yeah…you guys missed it. Farkle thought he had it in reverse, but it was actually in drive, so he went right over the edge and into the lake on the 10th hole.”
Riley covered her mouth with her hand as she giggled at her friend’s mishap. The mental image of Farkle driving a golf cart into a lake was priceless. “Oh my God,” she began as she wiped tears from her eyes. “What happened?”
“We managed to fish it out,” Lucas explained. “Thankfully the cart wasn’t damaged or anything like that.”
“So, who won,” Maya asked as she wrapped her arms around her suddenly cramped stomach. She wasn’t sure the last time she laughed so hard.
“I’ll give you one guess,” Zay answered sarcastically before he gestured to Lucas. “He was Mr. Perfect in middle school and high school. He’s still perfect…even in college.”
“I thought we didn’t keep track of our score,” Lucas told him.
“I lied. I was keeping track in the off chance that she,” he waved his hand in Riley’s direction, “got you off your game today because of last night.”
“Hey!” Riley crossed her arms over her chest in mock offense.
“You know what I mean,” Zay chuckled as he playfully winked at Riley. “How was the spa?”
“Good,” Maya answered. “It was relaxing…for the most part.”
“For the most part,” Farkle asked.
“The girl talk was…intense,” she elaborated. “Once that was out of the way, we were able to relax some and have a good afternoon, right Riles?”
The brunette nodded. “Absolutely.”
“What was your favorite part of the trip, Farkle,” Riley asked him. She knew that the breakup with Smackle still weighed on him, but she hoped that they were able to get his mind on something else, even if only for a little while. He seemed so uptight when they first arrived, but he had appeared to have relaxed some over the last few days.
“Honestly?” He smirked. “I think it was when Zay, Maya, you, and me were dancing last night.”
Riley laughed. “When I forced you to?”
He nodded. “Yeah…ever since Isadora…ever since the breakup, I haven’t been…I haven’t really been myself. Last night, I was able to let go for a little while…it was nice. It was nice to be able to laugh with you guys. It helped me to forget about…everything for awhile.”
“We’re always going to be here for you, Farkle,” Maya assured him.
Riley nodded. “Yeah, no matter what. You’re stuck with us…all of us.”
He smiled. “Yeah. I want you guys to know that you are the best group of friends I could ever ask for.” Maybe this trip was the first step in the right direction? He was finally able to let go for a little while and have fun without thinking about her. He knew that everyone had been patient with him as he dealt with everything, and for that, he was forever grateful.
“So, why don’t we do this then…” Zay stood up as he face the others. “No matter what happens. No matter where we go…what we do…every year, the five of us take a trip somewhere. It doesn’t have to be here or anything too exotic if we don’t want to. Just a trip somewhere. That way, no matter where we end up, we’ll still be in each other’s lives.”
“I like that idea,” Maya told him.
“Me too,” Riley smiled.
“So, let’s do it.” Farkle stood up before he slid his hands into the front pockets of his pants. He turned to Lucas. “Lucas?”
“Yeah,” he nodded as he stood up. “I think it’s a good idea.”
“I only have one question.” Maya looked between Riley and Lucas. “Where is Zay going to sleep tonight?”
Riley slowly turned her head to Lucas. When their eyes met, their cheeks turned crimson.
“You know, you don’t have to spend the night with me if you don’t want to…or if you want to take it slow,” Lucas told her the moment she came out of the bathroom in a pair of yoga shorts and a tank top. His heart fluttered at the sight of her. He briefly wondered if that feeling would ever go away, but as she walked toward him, he realized that his heart had fluttered every single time she entered a room. He looked down at the bed as he pulled the covers down. “Or, if you want, I can take the other bed.” He knew he was rambling. He never rambled before. God, what was she doing to him? “We don’t have to…just because Maya and Zay…” he looked back at her. He’d gladly turn into a complete buffoon if it meant that she would always look at him the way she was at that very moment. An amused smile tugged at the corners of her lips while her eyes seemed to sparkle underneath the glow of the lamp on the nightstand. He sighed. “We do what we do.”
She couldn’t help but to be slightly amused by his sudden anxiousness. She had never seen him so flustered before. She secretly enjoyed the fact that she had set him on edge for once, since he had always managed to make her act the same way. “Lucas, if I didn’t want to be in here, I wouldn’t be in here.” As she closed the space between him, her eyes fell to the bed. “And once we get back to the city, I’m not sure when we will have another chance to…you know…spend the night together. With finals and then winter break…I’ll be back at my parents’ for a month and you’ll be back with your parents and…” she blushed as she clasped her hands together. She slowly looked up at him. “I…I want to be with you…even if we’re just sleeping.”
He dropped the sheet as he turned to her. As nervous as he was a minute ago, a sense of tranquility suddenly washed over him. That was his Riley. She had the power to incite a nervousness he had never known in one moment and then immediately calm him the next. “Well, I think we’ve already been together longer now than the first time we were boyfriend and girlfriend.”
She laughed as she remembered their afternoon long relationship when they were in middle school. “Hey, it’s a step in the right direction, right?”
“Absolutely.” He wrapped his arms around her waist as he buried his head in the crook of her neck. “I’m glad you’re here.”
“Me too,” she closed her eyes as they held one another for a moment. She thought for sure that there would be a lot of awkwardness between them after their earlier encounter, but there wasn’t. If anything, she felt more comfortable around him, and despite his slight nervousness, he seemed to be more comfortable around her as well. “I’m glad that everyone seems ok with it.”
“Were you that worried about it?”
When they pulled back from one another, Riley turned away from her boyfriend as she slid underneath the covers of Lucas’s bed. “A little,” she admitted.
Lucas frowned. “Why?”
“Because of Farkle…and Smackle.” She looked up at Lucas as he sat down across from her at the foot of the bed. “They were together…forever…you know? A-And now, they aren’t. Have you even seen her since they broke up?”
He sighed. “No, I haven’t.” It wasn’t intentional. He and Smackle had grown to be pretty close friends over the years. They even went to the same college, but it was as if she had completely disappeared when Farkle and she broke up. He tried to text her, but she never answered. “You?”
“Once. It was…awkward…horrible. There was this Farkle sized elephant in the room and Maya and I tried so hard to tiptoe around it, but every single time we opened our mouths, we ended up saying something about Farkle. We didn’t mean to…we thought that we could make it normal. We thought that we could be friends with both of them, but…it was so…awkward. Maya and I tried to remain impartial throughout everything, but she broke up with him. She…she broke his heart and as much as we wanted to stay out of it, we also wanted to protect him. I think…I think Smackle knew that.” She paused as she thought back to that horrible afternoon at her mother’s bakery. “We weren’t mean or anything…and Maya and I thought that…well, I don’t know what we thought.” She looked down at her hands, which rested in her lap. “We haven’t…we haven’t hung out…or even spoken since then…and…I don’t want that to happen with us, Lucas.” She cut her eyes up to him. “If something happens…if this…if this ends, I don’t want our group to be even more fractured.” She took a deep breath. “It’s one reason why I…why I never told you how I felt.”
“Riley…I know that…that this changes everything, but I also know that whatever we have…it’s different than what they had.” He looked down as he reached for her hand. “They know that. They want us to be happy…I think Farkle especially. He knows that our relationship wasn’t his relationship. We’ve been friends for a really long time now. We know what we’re walking into.”
Riley glanced at their joined hands before she looked back up at him. “Lucas, we were never just friends.”
He ran his thumb over her knuckles as he lowered his eyes to their hands. “You know…my favorite thing in this world is when you talk to me.”
She furrowed her eyebrows. “It is?”
He nodded as he looked up at her. “I hated it when we drifted apart. It felt like…it felt like part of me was missing. It felt like the best part of me was missing. Riley, I know that I loved you before I even really knew what love was. When you pulled back from me after that party…and I heard you and Maya talking…I think that’s when I realized what love…what losing it really meant. I don’t…I don’t want to feel like that again. I don’t want to be incomplete. I don’t know what’s going to happen in the future. I don’t know where life is going to take us, but I do know that I’m willing to fight everything…fate, time, misunderstanding…just…everything…in order to be with you.” He took a deep breath. “I’d do anything for you.” He glanced down at their hands once more. “We’re different than Farkle and Smackle…and any other couple we know…because every relationship is different. This…you and me…I’ve been waiting a lifetime for it. Now that we’re…starting to explore that…I’m not going to be able to let go that easily. At the end of it all, I need you, Riley. It’s that simple and it’s that complicated…not to mention the fact that it’s also that scary.”
Riley swallowed. “I know that I’ve been running away from this…not just the last few days, but ever since Tombstone and Texas. I…I feel the same way. I know that I can’t lose you from my life…so I thought it was safer to hide…even after you and Maya broke up. I know I pulled away…and I need you to know that…it killed me. I hated leaving places when you were just showing up. I hated cancelling plans all together because I knew you were going to be there. I wanted to see you. I needed to see you…but knowing that scared me even more.” She gripped his hand. “I’ve been able to keep you away because…because I told myself that you didn’t see me like that, but…after that night in the hot tub…after we kissed…I knew…my heart knew that I…I couldn’t run away anymore. This…instinct that I have to protect my friendships tried to fight it. I tried to push you away, but…I can’t do it anymore. I don’t want to do it anymore. I want to be with you. I need to be with you. You’re right…it’s the scariest thing in the world to need another person, but I…I love you. I’m in love with you…and now that I’ve had a taste of everything I’ve been running away from…I know that I’m willing to fight for it too. Anything…everything that comes our way.” She ran her free hand through his hair. “We really stink at this taking it slow kind of thing.”
He smiled. “Yeah…but if you think about it…we’ve waited seven years for this. For some people, that’s taking it painfully slow.”
She considered it for a moment. “You make a good point.” She smirked. “You know…I wonder what my dad is going to say about all of this.”
“I have a feeling I’m going to be losing a lot more shoes,” he laughed. “At least over winter break anyway.”
“Oh, you think you’re going to sneak into my room without him knowing it?”
He smirked as he leaned in closer to her. “I’m going to try.”
Riley smiled against his lips as he kissed her. This felt right. More than right. Her hand slid to his neck as she opened her lips against his. He was rapidly becoming an addiction.
The phone in Lucas’s room blared promptly at 8:00am. He groaned as he rolled over and picked up the phone. “Thank you,” he mumbled before he put the hung up the device. As he rolled back over, he took a moment to look at the angel who slept next to him. So, yesterday wasn’t a dream? They were actually a couple now? He smiled as he wrapped his arms around her once more. Last night had easily been the best night of sleep he had in ages. Being able to hold Riley in his arms was more than a dream come true for him.
“What was that,” she murmured half asleep.
“Wake up call,” he answered softly as he kissed her bare shoulder. He reveled in the feeling of his skin pressed against hers. He could easily get used to waking up like this every morning.
“What time is it,” she mumbled as she pressed herself against him even more. The feeling of his skin next to hers felt nothing short of electric. Couldn’t they have this every morning? She frowned slightly as she slowly opened her eyes. No, they couldn’t. They had to get back to reality today, and that meant spending the night in their separate beds. Besides, if this was going to work, they couldn’t go 0 to 100 right away. She wanted to enjoy every single moment of their ‘honeymoon’ period.
He planted another kiss to the back of her neck. “8am.”
She slowly turned her head toward him. A lazy smile danced across her features. “Good morning.”
“Good morning,” he smiled.
“It definitely is,” she softly whispered before she pressed her lips to his. She sighed as she turned her body to face him. “How long do you think we have until Zay demands to come in and get this stuff?”
“Don’t worry,” he smiled as he ran his fingers down the length of her arm. “I packed it all up after you fell asleep last night. It’s already in the living room.”
Riley chuckled. “Poor Zay.” She never wanted to kick the guy out of his own room, but the temptation to have one full night with Lucas was too appealing to turn down.
“Poor Zay nothing,” Lucas insisted before he kissed her again. “I wasn’t about to let anyone disturb you.”
Her teeth lightly scraped her bottom lip as she looked up at him from underneath her eyelashes. “You know…you are always free to disturb me…if you want.”
“You aren’t tired of me yet?”
She smiled as she swung one leg over his hip as she straddled him. “No,” she answered as she leaned down to kiss him. “We’re just getting started.”
Lucas smiled as he wrapped his arms around her waist.
Riley’s furrowed her eyebrows as she flipped through the movie selection. She bit her bottom lip when she reached the movie she wanted to watch on their flight to Las Vegas—the movie that she had to stop watching so she could pretend to fall asleep all because she was petrified of sitting next to Lucas. Was that only four days ago? She tapped her fingers against the screen as she, once again, debated the selection.
Lucas smiled from his seat behind her. It was definitely déjà vu, but only this time, he felt a lot more confident as he leaned forward. “Are you ok?”
“Hmm?” She turned her head toward him as a half smile slowly formed on her lips. “Yeah, I’m ok.”
He gestured to her screen. “I heard that’s a good movie.”
Riley looked back at the screen as she softly chuckled. “Yeah…yeah. I’ve heard a lot of good things about it.”
“Do you want to watch it together? He glanced at Zay. “I’m sure Zay will switch seats with you…or if you want to sit by the window, I can move to the aisle?”
She slowly turned back to him. “I feel like we’ve had this conversation before.”
He looked down as he lightly laughed. “Yeah, we have. I’m just hoping that…”
“What?” She could practically hear her heartbeat in her ears as she waited for him to answer.
“That your answer will be different this time.”
Riley glanced at the blonde who slept next to her. She knew that once they got out of the airport, they would go their separate ways in order to study for finals. That meant that it would easily be a week before she could see him again. “I’d love to.”
Lucas couldn’t hide the grin on his face as he watched Riley get up from her seat. He nudged Zay, who had been completely oblivious to the entire conversation as he had his headphones plugged in and the volume turned up. “Zay,” he called out as he nudged him a second time.
Zay glared at his friend. “What,” he asked as he slid his headphones down.
“Can you switch seats with Riley?”
Zay glanced at Riley as she attempted to climb over a practically comatose Maya. He slowly looked back at his friend. “Ahhh, I got ya,” he nodded. “So, is this how it’s going to be from now on?”
Lucas frowned. “What are you talking about?”
“You two are going to be going out on dates and holding hands and all scared to death. You’re not going to think anything at all about ditching one of your best friends.”
Lucas furrowed his eyebrows. “I’m not ditching y--”
“Oh, you abandoned me for her,” he gestured to Riley.
“Zay, you know I’m not abandoning you.”
Zay’s look of complete and utter betrayal quickly morphed into laughter as he stood up. “Nah, I’m just kidding, man.” He slapped Lucas on the back before he looked at Riley. “I’m really happy for you guys.”
Riley smiled as she slid into Zay’s seat. “Thank you, Zay.”
Lucas looked up at his best friend. “Thanks, Zay.”
“Just remember this when you name your firstborn, ok?”
Riley and Lucas laughed as they watched him climb over a completely oblivious Maya. As Riley turned to Lucas, their eyes met. Their laughter slowly faded as they both considered Zay’s last statement. Could that be something in the future, perhaps? Kids? Maybe one day? Riley laughed nervously as she turned to the screen in front of her. “So, are you ready to watch this movie again?”
“Well, to be honest, I wasn’t really paying attention to it the first time.”
She frowned. “Really?”
He nodded. “Yeah. You see, I really wanted to watch it with this girl…but she kinda brushed me off.” He lifted his arm in a silent invitation for Riley to snuggle next to him.
Riley smiled as she curled up next to him. “Well, it was her loss.”
“Nah,” he decided as he handed her the left ear bud. “The timing wasn’t right.”
She looked up at him. “And now?”
He slid the right ear bud into his ear before he looked back at her. “It’s perfect.”
AU College Fic. Farkle never figured out how Riley really felt about Lucas, so it never got out. Now she’s turning 21 and the gang decides to go to Las Vegas to celebrate. Sometimes what happens in Vegas doesn’t always stay in Vegas.
Rating: M
Pairing: Rucas
Word Count: 8,827
Cross-posted at ff.net
Soundtrack (although not at all organized and subject to edits)
A/N: Trying something new with the second half of this chapter. Feedback would be appreciated, although is certainly not required. Again, this fic is rated M.
Maya thought for sure she would be the last person up the next day. She glanced at the alarm clock on the nightstand as she rolled out of bed. It was nearly 11am. She took one look at the other bed and quickly noticed that Riley was completely passed out. She had no idea what time the brunette finally went to bed, but Maya wasn’t about to wake her up until she absolutely had to. Last night was rough for everyone, but Maya knew that it was especially rough for her best friend. If Riley could find a few moments of peace in a different realm, who was she to disturb her?
Maya yawned as she quietly tiptoed out of the room. She could feel the effects of a small hangover as she closed the door behind her. She had a very faint headache, but knew from experience that one good meal would quickly cure her.
As she walked toward the kitchen, she noticed that only one other person was seated at the island. As she drew closer, she realized that it was the last person she wanted to see after the previous night. “Good morning,” she mumbled as she made a beeline for one of the cabinets.
“Morning,” Lucas grumbled in response before he sipped his coffee. He had been up for a few hours already as he tried to figure out what to say and how to pretend that his heart hadn’t been splintered into a thousand pieces last night. So far, he hadn’t come up with anything he could feasibly do. He considered hopping on the first plane back to New York, but he knew that he couldn’t hide from her forever. He didn’t want to hide from her, even though every protective instinct in him screamed at him to hide, to preserve some dignity and pride.
“Where are Zay and Farkle?”
Lucas shrugged. “Zay’s still asleep. I guess Farkle is too. I haven’t seen him.”
Maya turned toward him as she reached for the pot of coffee on the counter. “How long have you been up?”
“A few hours.” He looked down at the cup in front of him. He wasn’t really in the mood for small talk. All he wanted to do was escape to the golf course for a few hours. He needed something to do, something to concentrate on so that maybe he could stop thinking about Riley for a minute. “Went to the gym, got a shower, and now I’m here.”
Maya brought the mug to her lips. “Room service?”
He shrugged as he looked up at her. “I wasn’t sure what we were doing today in terms of meals, so I haven’t eaten yet.”
She sat the mug on the counter before she reached for the menu behind her. “I have no idea what the plan is either, but I do know I’m going to need something soon to kick this little headache I have, and I’m not really sure that the birthday girl is going to be up anytime soon.”
At the mere mention Maya’s roommate, Lucas’s gaze lowered to the counter. “Pretty wild night, huh?”
“You tell me,” she began as she glanced at the menu, “I’m pretty sure that you had the wildest night out of all of us…you know with the whole disappearing act and everything.” After a moment of silence, her eyes ticked up to look at him. If he wasn’t going to offer an explanation, then she was going to demand one. “Why didn’t you answer your phone when she tried to call you?”
“She tried to call me?” He frowned the second he heard the hopeful tone in his voice. He knew that it was a perfectly normal thing for Riley to do to check up on someone if they were late or missed an event. The fact that she tried to call him didn’t necessarily mean anything, did it? “I left my phone on the bathroom counter last night. It was completely dead when I saw it this morning. It’s charging now.”
Maya narrowed her eyes at him. “You wouldn’t ignore her on purpose, would you?”
“No,” he answered firmly. “Things are…complicated…at best between us, but I’d never want her to worry about me like that.”
Maya studied his face for a moment. Normally an excuse like that would be completely unbelievable, but given everything she knew and had observed about Lucas over the years, it was the only thing that actually made sense. She tilted her head to the side. If he left his phone at the hotel, then he wasn’t trying to hurt her on purpose. “So,” she placed her chin in the palm of her hand as she rested her elbow on the counter, “where did you go?”
Lucas didn’t even blink. “I know what you’re asking. Not that it’s any of your business, but I didn’t pick up any random girls last night.”
Maya smirked. “I figured that much.” She leaned back as she reached for the room service menu once more. When she looked back him, she chuckled at the surprised look on his face. “Riley’s the one who’s scared of your dating history, not me.”
He raised an eyebrow at her. “Oh, you aren’t,” he asked sarcastically. “Have you forgotten that I’m just a heartbreaker? I’m the guy who will date a girl for two months and then drop her once I get bored.” He knew his resentment was seeping out, but he didn’t even care anymore. He was tired of hearing the same story from everyone. Now that Riley knew how he felt, he wanted to set the record straight about his supposed reputation.
Maya shook her head before she took a sip of her coffee. Hearing the annoyance in his tone was the last piece Maya needed to confirm everything she had suspected. She now knew exactly what was going on. “Nope. I don’t think that’s the case. I love Riley. She’s my best friend in the world, but sometimes her insecurity prevents her from seeing the whole picture.”
“Meaning?”
A smiled spread across her face as she sat her coffee mug down. “Meaning that you find an initial attraction with a girl…a brunette with brown eyes…and on some subconscious level, you think that this girl is going to be the one to help you get over the girl you’ve been in love with since middle school.” When Lucas opened his mouth to say something, she held up a hand. “I’m not done,” she smirked. She wasn’t about to give him a chance to try to deny it, at least not until she had revealed her theory. “So, you try to make it work even though you find out pretty quickly that this girl is no Riley Matthews because…well, we both know there is only one of those in the world. You think that you can force it…maybe even make yourself believe that this time will be different…but then around the two-month mark, a certain four letter word starts to get tossed around and you realize that you aren’t in love with the girl you’re dating. So, instead of leading her on, you end things and move on to the next one, hoping that this one will be the one to make you forget about the girl you actually do love…the one girl you think you can’t have because she threw you into the ‘brother’ category seven years ago.”
Lucas closed his mouth as he looked back down at the counter. Out of everyone in their lives, how did Maya figure it out? Yes, Zay knew about it, but it was only after Lucas had practically confessed everything to him. As far as Lucas knew, Farkle didn’t have a clue. None of their other friends had any idea.
“But that’s just a theory I’m working on,” Maya added as she slowly spun her coffee mug around.
“How?” He had to know how she figured it out. “I didn’t even know I was doing it until recently. How is it possible that you knew before I did?”
“Because you’re way too close to everything to see it.” She crossed her arms over her chest. “I have one more theory. This is a new one that just came to me, but it makes all the sense in the world because…I know you. You’re not like most of the guys we go to school with.”
He took a deep breath. “What’s that?”
She paused. “It’s pretty invasive.”
“Maya, after the last two days, I don’t think much can surprise me anymore.”
She bit the inside of her cheek. He had a good point. She felt the same way, and she still had no clue as to what happened between Riley and him last night. “I don’t think that you’ve slept with any of them.”
Lucas furrowed his eyebrows. “What makes you say that?”
“Because,” she shrugged, “you’re different. Because Riley and you…are a lot alike and I firmly believe that you wouldn’t sleep with anyone you weren’t in love with.” She waited a beat. “I don’t need you to confirm or deny anything. It’s not any of my business.” She took another sip of her coffee as she considered her next words. “I was mad at you last night…because I thought that maybe I had been wrong about you, but now that I’m standing in front of you and I see how anxious you are…I know that I wasn’t wrong. After what I saw last night… when you came back after your little adventure…I’m pretty convinced that you’re in love with her and that you’ve been in love with her for a very long time. I think that those feelings are pouring from you now because…because you can’t possibly hold it in anymore. Seven years is a long time to hold feelings like that in.”
Lucas said nothing as he reached for his coffee. He took a long sip as he considered her words. “Wow, Maya,” he finally said as he sat his mug back down. “You should go on the road with that act.”
She shrugged, completely unfazed by the fact that he had just confirmed everything she had been thinking for the last few months. “It’s a gift.”
“It doesn’t change anything that happened last night.”
“Are you still mad about that kiss?” When he didn’t answer, Maya rolled her eyes. She hated how stubborn and dense both of them could be. “Dylan dared Asher to kiss her…for ten seconds. You came in around the third second.”
Yeah, it was a dare. He was told that much last night, but even if that were the case, it didn’t help erase the crystal clear mental image of her lips on Asher’s. “All of these games are so ridiculous. The only thing that happens is that everyone ends up making out with everyone else.”
“I know it’s juvenile, but it’s probably the last time we’re all going to be able to act like a bunch of stupid single kids in a place like this.” Maya sighed. How could she make him understand what was right in front of him without telling him something that Riley should be telling him? “Lucas, look. What happened is in the past. Now that it’s morning…now that it’s a new day…now that it’s her birthday…what are you going to do? Are you going to go after what you want or are you going to watch her slip away…again?”
“She doesn’t want me, Maya. She has this perception of me that I’m the biggest fuck boy that has ever walked the earth.” He rubbed the back of his neck. Maya had already figured it all out. He might as well come clean with her. Besides, Riley probably already told her what happened. “Last night I told her that I loved her and a few hours later, she’s kissing one of my best friends.”
Maya pinched the bridge of her nose with her index finger and thumb. So, that’s what happened. It made perfect sense. It explained why Riley freaked out. It explained why he left. It explained why he looked so defeated when he came back and saw her with Asher. “You’re an idiot.”
Out of every possible reaction he thought she might have had, this one was nowhere on the list. “Why?”
“No girl wants to hear ‘I love you’ from a drunk guy at a club!” She placed her hands on her hips. This felt like the plot of a cheesy romantic comedy. It was a series of misunderstandings, miscommunications, and bad timing. Both of the leads were so stupidly in love with one another that they were both acting like complete morons. “Especially when the girl is already scared to death of losing you.”
He knew the timing was bad. He never meant to tell her the way he did, but it wasn’t something he could take back now. “Maya, how does she feel about me? Really?”
“Lucas, you know I can’t tell you that, but…I can tell you that you two are the biggest idiots I’ve ever met. You would do anything for one another…even if that meant destroying your happiness.” She softly chuckled. “If there were ever two people meant for one another…” When he didn’t return her smile, she rolled her eyes once more. “Just trust me, ok? I’m the first ex. I know these things.”
“That’s the first wrong thing you’ve said during this entire conversation.” When Maya knit her eyebrows together in confusion, he elaborated. “You’re not the first ex.” It only lasted for a few hours, but Riley Matthews would always be his first girlfriend.
Maya gave him a knowing look. “She was never your ex anything.”
She was hung over. She wasn’t nearly as hung over as she probably should have been given everything that she drank last night, but still, she had a horrible headache the moment she opened her eyes. Riley still felt slightly drunk as she wandered into the kitchen, still cloaked in the shorts and tank top she went to bed in at nearly six in the morning. She was so grateful that Maya already had breakfast waiting for her. As she tried to eat enough to soak up the remaining alcohol in her system, she silently thanked God that she and Maya had a spa day today while the guys went golfing. After the insanity of last night, she needed to relax. She needed to close her eyes for a little while as she tried to process everything that happened last night.
“So, is there anything you don’t remember,” Maya asked as they laid face down on the massage tables. She closed her eyes as the masseuse began to rub her shoulders. She knew that she must have a lot of tension in that area. Between the standard end-of-the-semester stuff and the soap opera she found herself in, she had also spent the last two days trying to ensure that her best friend had a memorable birthday.
Riley sighed. She wished that she didn’t remember parts of what had happened—like that stupid kiss with Asher and her complete inability to say anything after Lucas told her that he loved her. “No. Unfortunately, I remember every second of last night.” Stupid alcohol.
Maya had to chuckle at the pitiful tone in her best friend’s voice. “Oh, poor baby. You drink copious amounts of vodka and wake up with only a slight hangover and a crystal clear memory of the night before.” She shook her head. “You know…most people would kill to be able to do that.”
Riley pursed her lips. She knew that things would probably be ten times worse if she didn’t remember what had happened, but she also would be blissfully unaware of the pile of mistakes she had made. While she was still angry that Lucas left, she was even angrier with herself. How could she stand there and not say anything to him? “Most people don’t completely freeze up when the guy they’ve been in love with for almost half of their life says that they love them.”
“So, that’s what happened?” Maya tried to act surprised, but knew she failed miserably the moment a slight giggle slipped through her lips. ‘Up next on The Young and The Oblivious,’ she mused.
“It’s not funny,” Riley groaned. “I’m such an idiot.” She closed her eyes and took a deep breath as she tried to get her body to relax, but she stiffened up even further as her mind refused to let her think about anything other than Lucas. “We were outside…we were kissing—“
“Kissing, huh?” ‘Huckleberry left that part out,’ she smirked.
Riley sighed. “Ok…maybe it was a little more than kissing, but that’s not important. He…he wanted me to tell him that when we sobered up…that when morning came…that we would be together.”
“What’d you say?”
“I told him that I couldn’t promise him that.”
Maya sighed. “Riley, why did you say that? You’ve been in love with him since the moment you met him. I thought you wanted to be with him?”
Yeah, she wanted to be with him. When she always thought about the future, he was always in it. Even when he was with someone else, even though she knew that it couldn’t possibly happen, when she thought of the future, she immediately thought of Lucas. “I do, i-i-it’s just that…”
“It’s just what?”
“He’s dated a lot of girls,” she softly answered.
Riley had spoken so softly that Maya almost didn’t hear her. “So? You’ve dated a lot of guys.”
“Yeah, but I’ve never…I’ve never been in a relationship with anyone. I’m not…I haven’t…and I don’t want to be the next ex-girlfriend, you know?”
Maya shook her head. She was going to lock them both up in one of the fifty rooms in their hotel suite as soon as possible. One honest conversation could solve this whole stupid misunderstanding between them. She knew that love tended to bring out the senselessness in people, but this was getting ridiculous. “You would never be his next ‘ex’ anything, Riley.”
“I’m scared, Maya. He’s the only guy I’ve ever…did you know that he got accepting into Texas A&M on a full scholarship?” She still couldn’t wrap her brain around it. His dream school. The school that could make his dream career a reality and he turned it down.
Maya bit her bottom lip. She didn’t know about that, but the moment she heard the words tumble out of Riley’s mouth, she knew exactly what her next question would be—and Maya already knew the answer. “You don’t say…”
Riley cut her eyes in Maya’s direction even though she knew she couldn’t see anything other than the floor. “You don’t seem surprised.”
“No, I am,” she insisted. “I’m surprised he didn’t tell anyone about it. Did he tell you last night?”
“No. Zay told me.” Riley shook her head. How she found out wasn’t what she wanted to discuss. “That’s not the point. Why would he give up something like that? It’s his dream school, Maya.”
“Maybe it wasn’t his dream,” she offered.
“What are you talking about?”
Maya was getting ready to explode. Could this be any more obvious? Riley was a smart girl and Lucas was a smart guy, but both of them were completely clueless about how much the other person really cared about them. “He wants to be a vet. We all know this, but there are a lot of schools he could go to in order to become a vet.”
“Yeah, but he always talked about A&M…at least he did when we were in middle school. Most of his family went there. He wanted to continue that tradition. I thought that he wanted to go back to Texas if he could…be a little closer to home,” her voice trailed off. She narrowed her eyes as she thought about it. “And A&M has one of the best veterinary programs in the country. He got a full scholarship, Maya. It just doesn’t make any sense.”
She closed her eyes as the masseuse dug into her shoulder. “Makes perfect sense to me.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Maybe there was something in New York that meant more to him?”
As soon as the girls came back into the suite, Riley made a beeline for the living room while Maya disappeared to their room to get ready for the evening. She stopped mid stride when she noticed Zay on the couch. His eyes were closed as his hands were folded across his chest. She didn’t want to bother him if he was trying to sleep, but she needed to know where Lucas was. “Zay?”
He opened his eyes. “Hey,” he smiled as he sat up. “How was the spa? Are you all relaxed and ready for tonight?”
She nodded even though she was anything but relaxed. “Where is he?” She knew she was being brief, but she knew that she had to confront Lucas before she lost her nerve.
“He’s in the bedroom, but—“ He stopped mid sentence as Riley breezed by him to go into the guys’ room. “He’s taking a shower,” Zay called out behind her.
Riley didn’t care or even think about what Zay said as she threw open the door to the guys’ room.
Lucas’s head snapped up as he reached for the towel wrapped around his abdomen. “Riley!”
Riley’s eyes widened. She knew she should leave and let him get dressed, but as she turned to leave, another thought came to her. If he only had a towel on, he could only run away so far. Surely he wouldn’t leave the suite dripping wet and only wearing a towel, right? She bit the inside of her cheek as she closed the door behind her. She knew her face was flushed as she turned back to him. “Why are you mad at me?”
Lucas gripped the towel as he looked down at himself. Could she not see that he had just gotten out of the shower? “Do you really want to have this conversation right now?”
She couldn’t wait any longer. If she waited, she would lose her nerve. The conversations she had with both Zay and Maya helped her to piece it all together. Now, she needed to know if it was true or if there was another reason for it. “It was just a kiss.”
He shook his head. “No, it wasn’t.”
She frowned. “What do you mean ‘no, it wasn’t’? I was there. It was one kiss…and it was because of a stupid dare.”
He thought about trying to brush off everything that had happened between them, but as he looked into her eyes, he knew that he would never be able to hide his feelings from her again. “A kiss is not just a kiss, Riley…not when it’s with you.”
She crossed her arms over her chest. “Asher and I are friends. Good friends, but just friends.”
An image of her lips on Asher’s flashed through his mind. “Does he know that?”
“Yes,” she insisted. “I didn’t…he didn’t…we didn’t feel anything when we…when we kissed last night.”
“Did you want to?” He wasn’t sure he wanted to know the answer, but he knew he had to find out.
“I knew that I wouldn’t,” she confessed. She knew it before Asher’s lips ever touched hers.
His grip tightened on the towel that was still wrapped around him. “Why’s that?”
The right corner of her lips turned up into a shy smile. “You know why.”
Although his heart skipped at the sight of her smile, it wasn’t enough to placate him. He needed to hear it. He needed to know how she felt—one way or another. “I don’t, Riley. I don’t know how you feel. I know how I feel. I know how I’ve always felt…but you…I just don’t know.”
She subconsciously licked her lips as she found the nerve to ask him the question that had been at the forefront of her chaotic thoughts for the last ten hours. “Why didn’t you go to A&M?”
“What?”
“Zay told me that you got accepted to Texas A&M…and that it came with a full scholarship.” When he made no move to deny it, Riley felt her heart drop. She knew that Zay would have no reason to lie about anything like that, but to have a silent confirmation from Lucas made it seem more real. “I know that it was your dream school,” she continued. “I know that it was where you’ve wanted to go since we were in middle school. I know that…I know that it’s almost impossible for an out of state student to get into the doctoral program there. Lucas, if you went there, you would already have a leg up on getting into their veterinarian program…and I know that you know that. So, I have to ask: why did you decide to go to Columbia instead? Why risk so much just to stay in the city?”
He was silent for a long moment as his eyes fell to the ground. He knew that Zay was only trying to help, but that was one secret he had hoped to take with him. He never wanted Riley to feel like she had prevented him from chasing a lifelong dream. “I think you already know the answer.”
Riley took a shaky breath. “Tell me.” She had to hear it. She had to know.
He looked up at her. “What’s the point, Riley? So you can push me away again?” He ran his free hand through his damp hair. “I didn’t go because I thought that maybe…maybe once we got out of high school, once we were out of that bubble…that you could maybe see me as someone other than your brother.”
“Lucas, I never saw you as a brother.”
“Yeah…I kinda figured that out last night.” He paused. “Riley, why did you tell me that?”
She clasped her hands together as she nervously shifted the weight of her feet. “Because I thought there was something between you and Maya. I thought that you both weren’t acting on it because of me…because you didn’t want to hurt me…so I stepped back…so that you two could be together and not feel guilty about it.”
He closed his eyes as her words resounded through years of memories. Did that mean that every time their eyes met, he wasn’t the only one who thought that the rest of the world faded away? Was he not alone in this? As her words echoed through his mind once more, it felt as if he had finally been released from the ‘brother’ shackles he had been forced to wear for years. This moment felt completely surreal. “You kept that a secret for seven years?”
Tears slowly formed in her eyes. “Yeah. Yeah, I…there were so many times that I wanted to tell you, wanted to see if maybe…if maybe you had any feelings for me, but every time I tried to, something happened. It was easier to hide in high school…I kept telling myself that you were Maya’s ex and I couldn’t have those feelings for you, but when we went to college…things changed. I thought that maybe we could…I don’t know…but then we went to that party and…”
He took a step closer to her. “And what? Because I thought that maybe we…maybe we connected that night.”
She gave him a sad smile. “I thought the same thing, but then I saw you making out with Lauren and I—“
“Riley, it wasn’t because I wasn’t…” he groaned. “Riley, I was drunk. I got drunk because I overheard you and Maya talking about me.”
She frowned. “You did?”
He nodded. “I spent like half an hour looking for you. I finally saw you and Maya outside. When I got close enough, I heard my name. I heard you tell her that you didn’t like me ‘in that way’.”
Riley winced. “That’s what happened? Lucas, I wasn’t sure what to tell Maya because we hadn’t talked about anything. I wasn’t sure how she would feel about it if I told her I had feelings for you. You two did date and besides…I didn’t know how you felt…then we went inside and I saw you with Lauren, so I thought that everything was just in my head.” She bit her bottom lip. While learning about their misunderstanding at that party cleared up some of the reservations she had, there was still something that nagged at her. “What about the conversation you had yesterday?”
“What conversation?”
“You told Zay that you wanted to go out and get a group of girls and bring them back here and do…whatever it was that you wanted to do.” Even saying it made Riley want to throw up.
“You heard that?”
She nodded. “I was coming to talk to you…to try to figure this out…and I heard you tell Zay that you wanted to have a real Vegas vacation.” She paused. “I didn’t stick around to get any of the details.”
“That’s why you kept pushing me away last night.” He let out a bitter chuckle. “Riley, I only said that because I was mad. I was frustrated that you turned me down. I never would have…I haven’t…” he groaned. “I’m not the guy you think I am.”
“Who are you?”
He waited a long moment before he answered her. She wanted to have an honest conversation with him. If they were laying all the cards on the table, it was time she knew the absolute truth about who he was. “Do you want to know why every relationship I’ve been in has ended around the two month mark?”
She nodded.
“That’s usually when it starts to get serious…that’s when I realize that they aren’t you. I never wanted to hurt anyone. I didn’t…I couldn’t…I didn’t love any of them, Riley.” He took another step closer to her. “I couldn’t tell them something that wasn’t true and I couldn’t…I couldn’t do anything with them that I only ever wanted to do with you.”
She furrowed her eyebrows. “What?”
His heart thundered in his chest. “You think that I’ve slept with half of New York when the truth is that…I’ve been waiting for you. I don’t want to have sex with anyone I’m not in love with and I’ve only ever loved one person in my life.”
She blinked several times as she listened to his confession. She tried not to dwell on the details of his love life, but she thought for sure that he would have had sex with someone by now. He had dated so many girls, and some of those relationships seemed pretty physical. “You’ve never slept with anyone?”
“No.”
She looked down as a million thoughts ran through her. He wasn’t that guy. He was only trying to do what he thought was right. He was, and always had been, Lucas Friar. Although part of her was surprised by his admission, another part of her had always hoped that would be the case.
“How could I,” he went on. “It’s always been you, Riley. I tried to move on because I thought it was what you wanted, but I couldn’t.”
“I couldn’t either. I tried…I tried so hard, but I…” she took a deep breath as she tried to steady her nerves. She had to tell him, even though she was scared. Even though she knew that she was risking everything, she knew that he deserved to know the truth. “I love you.”
“What?”
“I do,” she nodded as tears filled her eyes. The seven-year dam of miscommunications and misunderstandings had finally burst. “I knew it the moment I let you go. I thought it would fade over time…that my head would somehow convince my heart that it was the right thing to do, but I couldn’t. Those feelings only grew. I pushed you away because I couldn’t breathe around you anymore. All I wanted…all I’ve ever wanted…was you.” She swallowed. “I haven’t…you know…either.”
“Haven’t what?” As he took another step toward her, he wasn’t sure if he was dreaming or not. She loved him? She always loved him?
“I haven’t slept with anyone. I feel the same way you do about it. I…I wanted to be in love. The problem was that I pushed the guy I loved away from me…to the point where I thought he saw me as…well…as a sibling.”
He slowly closed the space between him. He wanted nothing more than to sweep her off her feet, but he was afraid that if he made any sudden movements, everything would fade away. “I never saw you like that. I-I tried to. I wanted to be who you wanted me to be, but I couldn’t, Riley.” He closed his eyes as she cupped his cheek in the palm of her hand. That one simple gesture reinforced the fact that this was no dream. “I couldn’t stop loving you…for seven years…I couldn’t.”
“Lucas, I love you.”
As her fingers lightly rubbed his cheek, he covered her hand with his. “Say it again,” he begged as he rested his forehead against hers. He wanted to hear it over and over again. He had to hear it again. It was easily the most beautiful statement he had ever heard in his life.
“I love you so much,” her voice cracked as she tried to quell the urge to cry. She leaned back slightly as she looked into his eyes. She couldn’t resist it anymore. The walls between them had toppled down and she had to be close to him. Seven years of separation had finally taken its toll on both of them.
The kiss was soft at first, barely a brush as their lips lightly grazed against one another. Both felt a slight wave of nervousness overcome them as they were ushered into a new world. This time there was no timer, no alcohol, nothing that could come between them. They were able set their own rules and boundaries.
Only they were tired of having any boundaries between them. They were tired of hiding how they felt. They were tired of being unable to explore every avenue of the love they had for one another.
Riley smiled against his lips as he wrapped one arm around her. His other hand still gripped the towel around his waist. She slowly opened her mouth against his as she ran her fingers down his back.
Lucas shuddered as her fingers danced across his back. Did she have any idea just how much of a hold she had on him? He wanted to give her anything and everything her heart desired. He knew that he was all in with her. When her lips parted, his tongue slowly dipped into her mouth.
As their kiss deepened, Riley lowered her hands to the towel that was wrapped around his waist. She rested one of her hands on top of the hand that had gripped the towel ever since she barged into his room.
Lucas pulled away from her the moment he felt her hand cover his. He searched her eyes for a long moment. “Are you sure?”
“I’ve never been more certain about anything in my life.” Her moved her hands to the hem of her shirt. Without a second thought and without taking her eyes off of him, she lifted her tank top over her head and tossed it to the corner of the room. “Your move, Friar.”
His heart raced the moment she slid her shirt off. It wasn’t just because she was nearly half naked in the room he shared with Zay, although he had to admit part of it was definitely because she was half naked. Still though, it was more than that. It was the look in her eye. It was the confident tone in her voice. It was everything about this moment. She barged in. She demanded answers. She decided that they were worth trying to figure this whole mess out. She knew what she wanted, and for some strange reason, what she wanted was him. He thought he would be nervous if the day ever came that he would be able to show her how much he loved her, but he wasn’t. The look in her eyes told him everything he needed to know. He was sober. She was sober. And they needed to form a connection that went beyond words.
And they needed that connection now.
He quickly closed the space between them as his lips crashed onto hers once again. Riley’s hands lowered to the towel once more. This time, Lucas didn’t hesitate as he allowed her to unwrap the towel from his torso.
With both hands free, he was finally able to familiarize himself with every curve of her body. He slid his lips down the column of her neck as his fingers danced along the straps of her bra. As his lips continued their journey toward her shoulder, he hooked his fingers under her bra strap and slid it out of the way.
Riley shivered as he slid her right bra strap off her shoulder. She tilted her head to the side as his lips slowly moved back to her neck. Her hands gripped his back as he maneuvered them back toward the wall. She gasped as her back hit the wall next to one of the beds. “Lucas,” she whimpered as his fingers slowly, painfully so, slid the other bra strap down her shoulders.
Lucas ran his fingers down her arm as his other hand rested on her waist. “Do you want me to stop,” he asked tenderly before his lips pressed a soft kiss to her shoulder.
“No,” she shook her head. “I want your hands, your mouth, your…everything…all over me.” She ran her hand through his hair. “I love you.”
His hands slowly made their way to the clasp on her bra. His lips found the little spot behind her ear that instantly made her shudder. “I love you too,” he murmured before he unhooked her bra. He could feel Riley’s pulse rate quicken underneath his lips as he tossed her bra to the other side of the room before his hands glided down the length of her back. For the first time ever, there wasn’t anything in between the top half of their bodies as they embraced.
“This feels so right,” she whispered as she closed her eyes. She kissed his shoulder as she reveled in the feeling of his skin pressed against hers. “Well…almost.” She moved her hands to the waistband of her shorts.
“No,” Lucas said as his hands covered hers. When Riley looked at him in confusion, he smiled. “Let me.”
Riley thought her heart was going to jump out of her chest when he took two steps back from her. She took a shaky breath as her eyes slowly lowered to admire his body. She knew what the male form looked like thanks to their ninth grade health class, several art exhibits Maya had taken her to over the years, and a few of the foreign films she watched on campus. She knew what to expect, but as her eyes raked over him the second time, she knew that nothing could have prepared her for seeing him. To say that Lucas Friar was built like a Greek god would be a severe understatement. She bit her bottom lip as he knelt down in front of her. As his eyes lifted to look into hers, she wondered what he was thinking about—if she was what he had imagined or not.
Lucas had to remind himself how to breathe as he took in the beauty of the angel who stood before him. All he wanted to do was worship her entire existence every single second for the rest of his life. She was even more perfect than he had ever imagined. Every freckle, every dimple was perfectly placed as it all added up to the goddess before him. He placed his hands on the band of her yoga shorts as he looked up at her. When she gave him a small nod, he slowly began to slide them down her legs.
Riley placed her hand on his shoulder as she stepped out of her shorts. She looked down at Lucas as he slowly ran his hands up the back of her legs. As his fingers reached the band of her black lace underwear, he leaned forward to place a gentle kiss on her hipbone. Riley closed her eyes as she leaned her head back. How was it possible that a simple kiss could make her feel completely weak in the knees?
Lucas smiled against her skin as he felt several goose bumps pop up along her hip. As his fingers hooked underneath her underwear, he kissed her hipbone once more, only this time, he casually scraped his teeth against the bone before he planted a deep open mouth kiss on her skin. He smirked when he heard Riley softly moan in response. He slowly tugged her underwear down as he continued to kiss along her side.
Riley knew her legs were visibly shaking as she stepped out of her underwear. Her eyes were completely closed, and her head was tilted back as she savored every connection his lips made to her skin.
“You’re beautiful,” he said softly as his lips slowly made their way further south. “Every square inch of you is perfect,” he continued as he finally reached the gates to the world he longed to reside in. He ran his hand down her right leg before he lifted it over his shoulder. He turned his head to the side as he placed a kiss against her thigh.
Her legs quaked and he hadn’t even touched her yet. The anticipation, the knowledge that he was about to pay homage to the most sacred place on her body was enough to send her mind reeling. She moved her left hand behind her as she tried to find something to hold onto. The only thing she could grip was the edge of the nightstand. She ran her right hand through his hair as she tried to steady her already ragged breathing.
The moment she felt his tongue against her, Riley leaned her head back against the wall. As incredible as his fingers felt last night, it didn’t compare to this. Her mouth fell open as a soft moan escaped her. She knew that her left leg would buckle from underneath her, and was honestly surprised that it hadn’t happened the moment his tongue slid in between her. If she died right now, she knew that heaven couldn’t possibly be as incredible as this feeling was.
He had never done this before, so he was completely unsure if he was even doing it right, but when he heard the soft moans and sighs coming from her perfect lips, he knew that he had to be doing something right. Encouraged by her reaction, his tongue slid up as it circled the most sensitive area of her body.
Riley sucked in her breath at the sensation. “Lucas,” she gasped.
“Hmm?”
The vibration in his voice reverberated against her, which sent another ripple of ecstasy through her entire body. “Lucas, I don’t want to,” she finally breathed once she was able to find her voice again.
He frowned as he slowly pulled back from her. “You don’t want to?”
It took her another moment to catch her breath. “I don’t want to have my first…my first orgasm…like that.”
He tilted his head to the side. “What do you want?”
She slowly lowered her head as her eyes met his. “I want you to be inside me.” When he didn’t immediately say or do anything, a sense of dread filled her. Had she completely ruined the moment? “Please,” she nearly begged. This couldn’t stop now. They were close—so close.
Lucas slowly lowered her right leg before he stood up. He would have gladly spent the next several minutes worshipping every square inch of her, but she didn’t want that. She wanted him. She wanted him to be inside of her. He never thought he would ever hear those words from her, but now that he had, he knew he would gladly and eagerly acquiesce to her request.
Without saying a word, he scooped her in his arms as he walked over to his bed. As he laid her down on top of the bed, he hovered over her. “Are you sure,” he finally asked her as he positioned himself in between her legs. “I know it’s going to hurt at first and I can’t stand the thought of causing you pain.”
“I’m sure,” she whispered as she pulled his face to hers. He was really concerned about her level of pleasure right now? Of course he was. He was Lucas. He always considered everyone else above himself and his feelings. They were more alike than Riley even knew. She didn’t think it was possible, but she was certain that she fell more in love with him in that moment. As their lips met, Riley knew that this was perfect. He was perfect. They were perfect.
As they kissed, he interlaced his fingers with hers. As she sighed into his mouth, he slowly entered her. When she whimpered, he paused as he took a moment for her to get used to the sensation.
Riley furrowed her eyebrows as she felt the pressure from his sudden entrance. It hurt more than she thought it would as he slowly slid into her. She didn’t mean to vocalize her discomfort, but the moment she did, he stopped, and kissed her softly on the lips before he slowly began to kiss a trail down to her neck.
She knew she didn’t deserve this. She didn’t deserve to be loved by him like this. He was treating her as if she were made of glass—like she was the most precious thing in the world. The most incredible part of all of it was that he made her believe that she was. She knew at that moment that he really did love her.
And he had waited all this time. He waited for her.
Her free hand slowly roamed over his back as he continued to kiss along her neck. She pushed down on his lower back to silently let him know that he could continue. Without a word, he continued to slowly fill her. Riley’s heart thundered in her chest as she desperately tried to forget the discomfort she felt.
As soon as he was fully inside of her, he lifted his head as his concerned eyes met hers. He didn’t even think about how it felt for him because he was so focused on making this as painless as possible for her. “Are you ok?”
Riley nearly burst into tears on the spot. The softness in his tone, the concern etched across his face was unreal. She nodded, too emotional to say anything.
He kissed her forehead as he gave her another moment to get used to the feeling. When he lifted his head once more, Riley untangled her fingers from his as she placed her hands on his hips. “I’m ready,” she finally told him as her eyes rose to meet his.
He slowly slid out of her, which incited a painful hiss from Riley. He frowned but she gave him a small nod of encouragement as her hands gripped his hips a little tighter. When he slid back in, she still felt some discomfort, but her heart also fluttered a little at the sensation. When she noticed that Lucas was waiting for her to say something, to give him any sort of encouragement to continue, she gave him a small smile. “I’m not going to break,” she insisted as she cupped the side of his face with one of her hands. “I’m ok,” she added as she lowered his face to hers.
The only thing that encouraged him to slowly increase his speed was the feeling of her lips pressed against his, while her tongue slowly massaged his, as their bodies fused together. Encouraged by the soft moans that escaped her lips, he began to slowly slide in and out of her. After a few moments, his concerns about the girl under him began to fade as a wave of pleasure overcame him. Her breathy sighs let him know that what he was doing to her was no longer painful—that she was receiving pleasure from it.
The first few times he slid into her, Riley was uncomfortable, but gradually, the pleasure from the friction overtook her. This felt good—more than good. How could it feel this good when it hurt so badly just a moment ago? She nibbled on his bottom lip as his rhythm began to increase.
Making out with Riley in the hot tub their first night in Vegas had sent him into another world. Being able to explore her body with his fingertips last night made him feel like the luckiest man to have ever roamed the earth. Tasting her essence gave him the chance to openly worship the woman he had dreamt about for so long. While all of the above had led up to this earth shattering moment, he knew that this—being able to surround himself with her, to feel not just a physical connection, but an emotional and spiritual one as well—was as if heaven had cracked open up above him and entrusted him with the task of ensuring the happiness of the most precious creature to have ever walked the earth. How fortunate was he to be able to experience one of the most sacred and cherished of acts of love with a true goddess. Surely the divine creature underneath him wasn’t mortal. She couldn’t possibly be. She was his missing piece; a fact that he had suspected all along. Nothing ever felt quite right when she wasn’t around, but now, now that they were together, everything around him felt so much more real. He knew that he could easily become addicted to this—to her—to being anything, to being everything she needed.
Because she was already everything to him.
Riley gasped as he hit a particularly sensitive spot inside of her. She arched her back into him as her eyes snapped shut. “Yes,” she moaned as she tilted her head back. “That feels so good.”
“I can tell you right now that couldn’t be nearly as good for you as it feels for me,” he murmured as he lowered his head to her neck.
She gasped again as he hit that spot once more. “That’s not possible,” she breathed as she further arched her back to meet each thrust he delivered.
The moment she began to move underneath him, Lucas knew that it wouldn’t be long before he completely lost control. His lips slid across her shoulder as he tried to focus on something, anything, other than the angel underneath him.
“Yes,” she whimpered as she dug her fingernails into his back. “Lucas, please don’t stop!”
He tried to think of something other than her. He tried to think about the starting line up of the Yankees, the time he participated in the polar plunge at Great Kills Beach last winter, and even the horrendous thought that this perfect moment with her was only a dream, but none of it worked. It felt too good. She felt too good. As she begged him to keep going, he knew he had to. He needed to hear her cry out for him. He needed to know that he had given her some small ounce of pleasure in exchange for allowing him to enter the gates of heaven.
He increased his speed with every sound of pure ecstasy that passed through Riley’s lips. He knew that he would do anything for her—even obliterate himself if he had to. She was the reason for everything he had accomplished since he moved to New York. She had taken his heart the moment they met, and now, as their bodies were one with one another, he knew that there would never be anyone else for him.
Riley moaned loudly as she felt the intense waves of euphoria flow throughout her entire body. Her body felt completely electrified as she entered an entirely new dimension. It was everything she had expected it to be and so much more.
The feeling of her walls caving in on him finally sent Lucas spiraling over the edge. He buried his head in the crook of her neck as he tried to catch his breath from his own meteoric release.
AU College Fic. Farkle never figured out how Riley really felt about Lucas, so it never got out. Now she’s turning 21 and the gang decides to go to Las Vegas to celebrate. Sometimes what happens in Vegas doesn’t always stay in Vegas.
Rating: M
Pairing: Rucas
Word Count: 7,236
Cross-posted at ff.net
Soundtrack (although not at all organized and subject to edits)
A/N: Warning: this chapter sucks. Something got lost in translation from my brain to my fingers. I’ve tried to smooth it out the best I could, but I’m still not happy with it. Also, if you’re curious about the chapter title thing, there is a HUGE clue about the origination in this chapter.
A standard room at the Bellagio runs around $200 a night, but he didn’t want there to be anything standard about what the next few hours held for them. He knew exactly what kind of room she would want without her ever having to say a word. He knew that she would want one with a magnificent view of what had captivated her attention every time her beautiful brown eyes landed on it. Without a second thought, he knew that she would want a picture perfect view of the fountains, although if he had his way, she would miss the rest of the shows that night.
She wasn’t sure how he managed to slide the key card in and pull on the handle while he had her pinned against the door. Their lips seemed to have been permanently bonded together the moment they reunited in the elevator on the way up to the 21st floor.
Thankfully, no one else had joined them on the ride up. Even if they had, Riley wasn’t sure that they would be able to wait. It was completely unexplainable. They had been able to keep their distance from one another for so long. It stood to reason that they could wait another five minutes.
But they couldn’t.
Seven years of repression erupted from them the moment he told her that he loved her. She wasn’t sure how they made it as far as the elevator without ripping one another’s clothes off.
As soon as the elevator doors closed behind them, and they were finally alone, she knew that all bets were off.
“Tell me again,” he growled as he pulled her to him. “I have to hear it again.”
“I love you.” She barely got the words out before his lips crashed to hers in a frenzy. As the elevator began its trek up to their floor, their hands roamed all over one another as their mouths refused to be separated. Nothing else existed in that moment but them, this moment, and the realization that they were literally holding onto everything they had ever wanted.
She gasped as he lifted her off her feet. She wrapped her legs around his waist as he pressed her back against the wall of the elevator. She snaked her arms around his neck in a desperate effort to get even closer to him. She wiggled in his arms in sheer anticipation as she felt his hands slide up her dress. A shiver rippled through her entire body when he finally gripped her ass.
“I need you,” she begged the second he released his lips from hers. As soon as his lips connected with her collarbone, she arched her back as a soft moan escaped her. “Lucas, I can’t wait another second.”
Riley reluctantly opened her eyes as the elevator chimed. They had made it to the 21st floor. As the doors opened, she noticed that no one was on the other side. Lucas said nothing to her as he carried her down the hallway to the room.
As soon as he opened the door to the hotel room, he scooped her in his arms once more as he hurried inside. He had her dress already halfway unzipped by the time he booted the door closed behind them.
Riley kicked her heels off as he carried her the entire way to the bed. As soon as her feet touched the ground, she slid her dress down. She always thought she would be scared to death about her first time, but there wasn’t a nervous bone in her entire body. Why should she feel nervous when everything felt so right?
As her dress pooled around her ankles, her eyes locked onto his. The look of pure adoration in his eyes was enough to fill her with a confidence she had never felt before as she stepped out of the garment. She closed the space between them as her hands reached for the tie around his neck.
As she began to loosen his tie, he leaned forward to place a soft kiss against her lips. “I love you,” he murmured as he threaded his fingers through her hair. As she slid the tie off and reached for the top buttons of his shirt, he placed his hand over hers to stop her. “I never stopped loving you…even though you told me that you only saw me as a brother.”
If her head had been a little clearer, if her heart had been a little less scared, if she hadn’t heard his comments to Zay earlier that night, or if she had been able to keep her brain turned off, then maybe it would have happened just like that. Maybe she would have lost her virginity to Lucas Friar at the Bellagio hotel in Las Vegas on her 21st birthday.
But she didn’t.
She was practically catatonic as seven years of memories—of everything she thought was real but suddenly wasn’t—faded away into something much more complex and raw. She had been wrong about everything the entire time? It didn’t make sense.
She shook her head as his words bounced around her mind. Her knees desperately tried not to buckle from underneath her as she tried to pull herself out of her daydream. Her eyes fell to the ground as her brain finally caught up with everything that had happened between them in the last fifteen minutes. He loved her when they were in Texas and she stepped back? He loved her now? What about the parade of girls that had gone in and out of his life in between then and now? What about what he told Zay earlier that night? What about that stupid party? What about the girls who had surrounded him all night? Everything he said to her contradicted the last seven years of her life. How could she even begin to process all of this, especially while she was inebriated? How could she push through the fog in order to reach the logical part of her brain when her body screamed at her to stop thinking and do whatever it took to get him into that hotel room?
As her eyes slowly wandered back up to him, she realized that he was no longer standing in front of her. He left.
Again.
He left her on the patio at Hyde for the second time that night. Tears welled in her eyes as she looked back at the fountains for a moment. “No,” she murmured before she turned back toward the door to the club. It wasn’t right. He couldn’t just tell her that he loved her and then walk away from her. That wasn’t fair. It wasn’t fair that he could say all of that and not give her a moment to process the fact that that everything she had known about the last seven years was a complete and utter lie.
With a renewed sense of determination, she marched back into the club. The adrenaline that filled her carried her trembling legs as she looked for him at the table, every bar in the club, and even the dance floor. She must have searched for him for twenty minutes before she began to worry. Where had he gone? He didn’t actually leave the club, did he?
By the time she reached the table, her adrenaline had completely evaporated as a blind panic charged through her senses. “Where is he,” she asked the small group.
Maya frowned as she took in Riley’s frazzled appearance. Her hair was disheveled, her eyes were bloodshot, and she seemed to be coming apart at the seams. Maya knew it only had to mean one thing. “Lucas?”
Riley nodded.
“He left,” Farkle answered.
Riley crossed her arms over her chest as she released a shaky breath. “He left? W-Where did he go?” She glanced around the table. She noticed that the two women he had been around for most of the night were also gone. “W-What happened to those girls?”
“They left too,” Dylan told her before he finished off the rest of his beer. “Around the same time he did.” He glanced at Asher as he sat the empty glass back down on the table. “Dude, do you think he left with both of them?”
Asher shrugged. Truthfully, he had no idea what was going on with Lucas. First, he didn’t say a word about being in Las Vegas when he knew damn well that Dylan and he were going to be there. Secondly, Lucas had barely said two words to him all night. Thirdly, he seemed to have this major chip on his shoulder. He wasn’t acting like the Lucas he had grown up with and had known for most of his life.
Maya’s frown deepened as she listened to Dylan. She looked back up at Riley, whose eyes were filled with tears. Something bad had happened. Something major and bad. She was afraid to ask, but knew that she had to. “What happened?”
Riley slowly shook her head as desperately tried not to fall apart in the middle of the crowded club. She couldn’t lose it now. She had to remain calm. She had to remain focused. She had to find him.
“Are you ok,” Zay asked her as he climbed out of the booth.
She shook her head again. “Um…I’m getting a little tired. I think I’m going to…head back.”
“We’re coming too,” Maya insisted as she stood up. She had no idea what was going on with Riley, but there was no way she was going to let her go back to the hotel by herself.
Riley tried to text him the entire ride back to the hotel. As soon as the group entered the suite, she made a beeline to the bedroom she shared with Maya. She quickly dialed his number as she closed the door behind her. After four rings, his voicemail kicked in. “Lucas, i-it’s Riley. I-I’m sorry that I didn’t immediately respond to what…to what you said. I…I was in shock…and I’m…I’m really drunk…you’re really drunk…and i-it’s just a lot to take in. I mean…did you even mean it? God, I probably shouldn’t even be asking you this over a voicemail because what if you didn’t mean it? What if…what if it all came out in the heat of the moment? What if it was just…what if it was just some drunken word vomit because we were about to—“ she cringed as she pulled the device away from her ear. She quickly erased the message and started a new one. “Lucas, it’s Riley. Please call me back or text me or something. No one knows where you went and I’m worried. Just…just send me something to let me know that you’re…that you’re ok. Don’t worry about waking me up. I’m not going to be able to sleep until I know that you’re ok. Ok. Bye.” She hung up her phone as she slowly sat down on the bed.
She ran a hand through her hair before she fell backward on the bed. She gripped her phone and closed her eyes as she tried to quell the intense urge to bawl her eyes out. Was it real? Did he love her or was it because of the fact that they were about to do something incredibly stupid right outside of a Las Vegas nightclub?
She groaned as she rolled over onto her stomach and buried her face in the mattress. She would have gladly and eagerly given her virginity to him outside of that club if it had gotten that far. God, if his fingers felt that amazing, how incredible would it feel to actually have him inside of her?
An image of the two women he had been with for a good chunk of the night flashed through her mind. Riley’s stomach churned as a wave of nausea overcame her. Was he with them right now? Were they at wherever those girls were staying? Were they having the time of their lives because Riley hesitated—because she couldn’t immediately give him what he wanted at that moment?
‘No,’ she reasoned as she tapped her phone against the bed. He wouldn’t do that. He wouldn’t tell her something like that and then run off with two complete strangers.
At the same time though, he was drunk and she knew that he was mad at her. What would stop him from doing something like that—especially if he didn’t know how she felt? She knew he wouldn’t hurt her, but if he didn’t know how she really felt, what would stop him from making his threesome dreams a reality?
She squinted as she glanced at her phone. Nothing. “Dammit Lucas,” she muttered as she slowly sat back up. He could yell, scream, call her every name in the book if he wanted to; she just needed to know that he was ok.
Maya knocked on the door once before she entered the room. “Hey.”
Riley turned to her. “Hey.” She knew Maya had to be curious about what had transpired at the club, but Riley had no idea what to say to her. She had no idea what was going to happen next. She wasn’t sober enough to field questions about what she and Lucas were, are, or going to be. All she knew was that she wasn’t going to be able to sleep until he came back to the suite.
“Do you want Asher and Dylan to leave?”
Riley shook her head before she looked back down at her phone. “No…I have a feeling I’ll be up for awhile.”
“You haven’t heard anything from him yet?”
“Nope,” she sighed.
Maya walked around the bed in order to sit down next to Riley. “What happened?”
Riley ran a hand through her hair once more. “I can’t even begin to tell you…not now anyway.” She slowly stood up before she walked toward the dresser to grab a change of clothes. The small act distracted her—gave her something else to think about for one second that didn’t completely revolve around him.
“Ok, you don’t have to tell me…not now, not even later if you don’t want to. I just want you to be ok.”
“I’m fine,” she lied as she pulled out a pair of shorts and a tank top. “I just…I need a distraction. I need to get my mind off of him before I completely lose it.” She tossed the garments on the bed before she looked up at Maya. “Why’d he leave, Maya? Where did he go? Who is he with?”
“I wish I knew.” As she watched Riley throw her hair back into a bun, Maya couldn’t help but to feel helpless about the whole situation. She knew that Riley was about to come apart at the seams, and there was nothing she could do about it. She was beginning to regret not locking them in a room when she had the chance. “I’m sure he’s ok. The guys said that he disappears sometimes…he’ll be back soon. I’m sure of it.”
“But he just left.” Riley clenched her fists as her lips formed a thin line. Was he ignoring her on purpose? Had he listened to her voicemail yet? What if he really left with those girls? What if he was covered in lipstick and cheap perfume when he finally decided to come back? The pit in Riley’s stomach swelled at the mere thought of it. “I called. I texted. He’s not answering anything.”
“Maybe he went to the casino or something,” Maya tried to reason. “I’m sure he’s not ignoring you on purpose. He’ll call. I know he’ll call.” As Maya stood up, she thought of a hundred different ways she could kill Lucas and make it seem like an accident. She knew that whatever happened had to be some ridiculous misunderstanding, but she would always have a fierce loyalty to the brunette who seemed to be on the verge of a nervous breakdown. She knew she needed to stay out of it, but if he hurt her, Maya knew she couldn’t be held accountable for the certain pain she would inflict on him. “Zay’s ordering food from downstairs. Any special requests?”
Riley shrugged. Food was the last thing on her mind. “I’m ok with whatever you guys want.”
“I’ll let you get changed.” When Maya reached the door, she turned back to Riley once more. “It’ll work out, Riley. I know he’s not going to do anything stupid.”
Riley laughed as she took another sip of her drink. An hour had passed since she seemed to be on the verge of a complete meltdown. Within that hour, her mood must have changed five different times. She was worried, then she was upset with herself, then she was angry with herself, then she was angry with him, and finally, she reached the most dangerous stage of all: denial. She had managed to convince herself that she didn’t care where he was or what he was doing. He hadn’t called her. He hadn’t texted her back. He had been gone for about an hour and a half, and Riley figured that he must be trying to punish her for hesitating, for trying to work through their complicated history before responding to his confession. He had no right to be mad at her. She needed to think. She never even wanted to have that conversation while they were intoxicated. He pushed it. He pushed her and then he left without waiting to hear an answer from her. This wasn’t her fault. And now, he was gone. He was somewhere in Las Vegas ignoring all communication attempts she made to him. “Someone has to teach me about blackjack before I lose all of my money tomorrow at the casino.”
Maya glared at the drunken brunette as she watched Riley slowly lean closer to Asher. She knew that she had encouraged Riley to have fun and maybe forget about the whole Lucas thing for now, but she wasn’t sure that she wanted to see her friend quite like this. She was more than pissed off at Lucas and the way he abandoned whatever conversation they were having. As she listened to Riley giggle at something Asher said, Maya knew she would be damned if she let Riley do something she would regret in the morning. She had to keep an eye on the brunette. She was drunk, embarrassed, and angry. She wasn’t sure what Riley was capable of right now. She had never seen her so worked up in her entire life.
Zay shuffled the deck of cards before he dealt out two to everyone. “Ok, Riley…for this round, I’ll show you my cards so I can tell you what is what and everything.” He flipped his cards over as dealt out everyone’s hands face up. “Ok, so I have a dime and a deuce.”
She frowned. “Wait. What?”
“They’re just nicknames for a ten and a two. The number cards value is whatever it says. The face cards—jack, queen, and king—have the value of ten…like dimes do. Aces can count as either eleven or one.”
She nodded as she narrowed her eyes at the cards in front of her. “Ok, so I have a queen and an eight…so, I have eighteen.”
“Exactly.” How was it possible that Riley had gone through the first twenty-one years of her life having never played blackjack—even just for fun? “Now, the object is to get the closest to 21 without going over. Your goal is to beat whatever the dealer has.”
She nodded. She had never played this card game before, but the concept seemed simple enough. “Ok…so...hit me.”
“I thought you said you never played before,” he smiled before he looked back down at her cards. “I gotta tell you though that eighteen is pretty good. I might stay if I were you.”
She grinned as she reached for her drink. “I’ve seen the movie ‘21’ and I like to live dangerously.”
He laughed. “Very well.” He turned up her card. “Wow. A trey. You’ve got 21.”
Riley squealed as she victoriously raised her hands in the air. “Yes!”
“I really don’t understand where Lucas went.” Dylan rubbed the back of his neck as he wandered back over to the rest of the group. Yeah, Lucas had been known to disappear at times, but he would usually tell someone where he was headed and an idea as to when he would be back. Even if he ran off with those girls, he thought for sure that he would at least text someone to let them know not to wait up for him.
Zay shook his head as he shuffled the cards. “I wish I knew. He only said that he needed some space and a change of scenery.”
Riley stared at Zay until he finally looked up at her. Thank God for vodka. An hour ago, she would have been scared to ask anyone where he could have gone, but now, after not hearing anything from him, and after consuming two more drinks, the brunette felt more prepared to face the truth—no matter how much it hurt. “Is that code for wanting to have sex with a random stranger…or strangers as the case may be?”
Zay furrowed his eyebrows. Where did that come from? “You know he’s not like that, Riley.”
“Zay, you have to admit that he does go through girls pretty quickly.” Farkle reached for a slice of pizza. “I think I’ve never loved pizza more than at 3:30 in the morning.”
As Zay dealt the cards, he shook his head. “Yeah, it might seem like he goes through a lot of girls. I mean…he’s had a lot of girlfriends, but that’s not exactly what…he’s not that guy. Trust me.”
“Then what’s going on with him?” Maya wasn’t sure what to think anymore. She thought she had a picture perfect view of him, but this whole disappearing act—not to mention Riley’s emotional roller coaster ride since he left—suggested that he wasn’t at all who she thought he was. Something wasn’t adding up.
Zay sighed. He wanted to tell everyone why Lucas had been in a sour mood throughout the whole trip. He wanted to tell everyone everything he had learned earlier that evening, but as much as everyone liked to think that Zay couldn’t keep his mouth shut, he knew that this time, he had to. If Lucas wanted to tell Riley how he really felt, then he would. It wasn’t Zay’s call to make that decision for him. “I can’t get into that right now.” He glanced at Riley. She seemed worried when they first got back to the suite, but for the last half hour or so, she acted as carefree as she was at the beginning of the night. Maybe Lucas was off trying to figure out how to tell her how he felt? There was no way he was somewhere having sex with a random stranger—not after the way he acted earlier. He wouldn’t sabotage himself like that, would he? “Besides, it’s her birthday and I know we all just want to have a good time, right?”
Maya slowly nodded. “Yeah. Right.” She wasn’t sure where Lucas was, who he was with, or what he was doing, but at that moment, Maya knew that when morning came, she was going to have a little chat with him.
“Enough with the heavy stuff then.” Asher was beyond exasperated by the conversation as he stood up. It was Riley’s birthday and he was tired of theorizing what was going on with Lucas. The guy was one of his best friends, but none of them were in the right state of mind to accurately assess his state of mind. He wanted to have fun with the people he only saw once a year. He wanted Riley to have a good birthday. “We have this incredible suite. Let’s make the most of the rest of this night.”
“What do you suggest,” Farkle asked.
Asher looked around the living room. There was the pool table, the bowling alley, and the hot tub. The possibilities were endless, but he wasn’t sure which option would be the most entertaining for everyone. “I don’t know. What did you guys do last night?”
Lucas thought for sure everyone would be asleep by the time he made it back to the suite. It had to be close to 4:00am. Time had completely slipped away from him. He didn’t want to have a third round with Riley tonight. He was irritated with himself for walking away from her after his admission, but he didn’t see any possible positive outcome for him—especially when she didn’t immediately say anything back to him. He figured that she would laugh in his face, not believe him at all, or feel obligated to say something like that in return. As he waited for her to say something—anything—he realized that his admission wasn’t fair to either of them because in her drunken state, he wasn’t going to entertain any response from her. He didn’t even mean to let it slip out like that. So, instead of putting her through the pressure of having to answer him, he left. He didn’t know what else to do at the time.
He was frustrated, angry, and more than a little drunk as he climbed into the elevator to go back to the penthouse suite. He had never been this angry with himself. He had been able to keep everything together for seven years and within a few heated minutes, he had drunkenly bared his soul to her.
As he walked out of the elevator, he prayed that everyone would be asleep. He couldn’t stomach the idea of confronting her, or any of them, right now.
All he wanted to do was forget the whole thing for a little while. So, he sat alone at one of the bars downstairs for nearly two hours as he desperately tried to forget everything that had transpired with Riley.
Only, he couldn’t forget. He realized that he didn’t want to forget. As much as it would hurt to get rejected by her again, he knew that he had finally taken a chance. It took him years—and a lot of alcohol—to get to that point, but he finally told her how he felt.
She was in his arms. For a few glorious moments, he knew that she had melted into him. God, he wanted nothing more than to get a room for the night for them—something private, something special. He knew that he’d never want anyone the way he wanted her as his fingers dipped into paradise. The gateway to Utopia was pressed against his fingertips and it was at that moment that he knew he wanted to live there forever.
But then he had to open his mouth and beg her to be his. He had gotten greedy by wanting more and more of her. She didn’t want to talk about it while they were drunk, so instead of respecting her wishes, he pushed her. Why?
Because he needed to hear the words more than he needed to feel her around him.
He was a fool—a hopeless fool in love.
He sighed as he slid the key card into the door. As he opened the door, he was mildly surprised to hear conversation come from the living room.
As he wandered into room, his curious frown deepened as he came face to face with the one thing he was trying to avoid the entire trip. His heart dropped into his stomach as his eyes refused to look away from them.
Riley and Asher. Asher and Riley. He knew that he was drunk. He hoped that he would be unable to recollect the sight before him when morning came, but as he watched one of his oldest friends kiss the woman he was in love with, Lucas knew that the image had been permanently seared into his brain.
As the door closed behind him, Riley detached her lips from Asher. The others were also in the living room, but Lucas wasn’t interested in what they were doing or what their reactions were to his presence. He only wanted to see her reaction. He only wanted to know if she cared that he had forced himself to watch her lips move against someone else’s.
“There you are,” Dylan happily exclaimed.
The others remained completely silent. No one wanted to move, to breathe, out of fear for what might happen next. The look on his face said it all, at least it did to Maya, Zay, and Farkle.
Riley’s eyes widened as she spun around to face him. Her hands fell to her sides as she waited for him to say something—to react—to do anything other than look at her as if she had just stabbed him in the back. She didn’t even want to play the stupid game in the first place. She only did it because she didn’t want to go to bed. She didn’t want to be left alone with her thoughts. She didn’t want to call him for the twentieth time and plead for him to come back to the suite.
“Y-Yeah,” Maya stammered as she looked back and forth between Lucas and Riley. How was she the first person to recover from the shock of Lucas coming back? She thought for sure Zay or Farkle would have already explained the situation to him. Did they know what was happening between Lucas and Riley? “We were just playing truth or dare.”
Lucas slowly walked further into the living room as he slid his jacket off. “I bet.” A lot of emotions charged at him in that moment, but the only one that seemed to have a stranglehold on his heart was the feeling of complete and utter defeat.
“Do you want to play with us,” Asher asked as Lucas casually laid his jacket on the back of one of the chairs by the bar. The entire mood of the room shifted the moment his friend walked into the suite. He wasn’t sure why everyone seemed so tense all of a sudden.
Lucas bit down on his bottom lip as he turned back to the group. He glanced at Asher before his eyes finally rested on Riley. “No,” he answered calmly as he loosened his tie. “I’m done playing games.”
The hardness in his tone nearly knocked Riley back. She crossed her arms over her chest as she tried to steady her nerves. “Where were you?” Her voice quaked with every syllable. She didn’t want to know, but at the same time, she had to know.
He slid his tie off his neck. He didn’t notice the tremor in her tone. His despondency had completely taken over him. It was easier to deal with what he had just witnessed this way. This way, he could retreat to his room without making another unnecessary scene with her. “Doesn’t really matter, does it?”
“I bet you met a girl,” Dylan grinned as he slapped his friend on the back. He wasn’t sure why Maya, Riley, Farkle, and Zay seemed so tense. “She wore you out too, right?”
Lucas’s eyes never left Riley’s. “Yeah,” he answered slowly before he sighed. “She really wore me out.” His heart ached more and more with every breath he took. Maybe he should have stayed downstairs until the sun came up. At least then, he wouldn’t have the mental image of her lips locked with Asher’s in his mind.
“Nice,” Dylan smirked before he wandered over to the bar to grab another beer.
“You guys have fun,” Lucas told the group before he finally tore his eyes away from the brunette who remained frozen in her spot in the middle of the living room. Lucas looked down at the tie in his hands as he turned to go to his and Zay’s room. “It’s been a long day and I didn’t get much sleep last night.”
As she watched Lucas retreat to his room, Riley could feel a wave of tears sting her eyes. It was their second night in Las Vegas and both nights left her in tears because of something stupid she did. She wanted to go to him. She wanted to talk to him, but at that moment, she had no idea what to say to him. She also knew that perhaps for the first time ever, he didn’t appear to want to talk to her at all.
“And then there were two,” Zay sighed. Once Lucas went to bed, the others slowly drifted to their rooms. Farkle was able to get Asher and Dylan a ride back to their hotel before he went to bed. Maya waited until Asher and Dylan actually left before she finally called it a night, which left Riley and Zay alone in the living room.
“It’s 5:30,” Riley stated as she looked down at her hands. She didn’t feel nearly as intoxicated as she did earlier in the night, but she still felt out of it. She wasn’t tired, although the severe lack of sleep over the last two days made her body cry out in a desperate need to rest. Her brain wouldn’t let her—not yet anyway.
“I know you’ve got to be tired,” he yawned. He knew he was exhausted. It was a fun night, for the most part. He hated to see it end, but they also had one full day left. Although they weren’t going to party quite so hard their final night in town, they were still planning on having fun at the casinos. He and the guys had a 1:00pm tee time on one of the golf courses while Maya and Riley had a spa day planned. He was going to be dead on his feet if he didn’t at least try to get a few hours of sleep in. “Why don’t we go to bed?”
She crossed her arms over her chest as she leaned back into the seat. “I’m not sleepy.”
Zay frowned. “How is that possible? We’ve been up for almost 24 hours.”
Riley bit her bottom lip. She knew that dragging Zay into this whole situation probably wasn’t a good idea, but if anyone knew what was going on in Lucas’s mind, it was Zay. He had known Lucas the longest, and had also been a witness to most of their friendship. If anyone could shed any light on it, it would be him. “I have a lot on my mind.”
Zay didn’t miss a beat. “Lucas?”
Her head snapped up to look at him. “He told you.”
“Nah. Not really. I think you forget that he and I are a lot like you and Maya. I know when something is bothering him.” He waited a beat as a frown crossed his features. “Although apparently, I’m not as in sync with him as I thought I was.”
“Why is that?”
“Because I only realized what was going on between you guys before we went out tonight.” He slowly lifted his eyes to look at her. He knew that there was only so much he could say to her, but maybe if she talked to him about it, he could fix whatever miscommunication was going on between them. The tension between them had expanded so rapidly over the last few days. He was certain that it was all leading up to some sort of explosion. “What’s going on, Riley?”
“I wish I knew.” She sighed as she sat up. She took deep breath as she pulled the hair tie out of her hair. “When did everything get so complicated Zay?”
He thought about it for a long moment. “I think it got complicated when we realized that some feelings run deeper than those of a normal friendship.”
“I don’t know if I want anything to change,” she confessed as she ran a hand through her tangled locks. Along with everything else, it was something that had been at the forefront of her thought process. She knew that they had been drifting apart, but was she willing to risk losing him completely if it didn’t work out?
“I think things are going to change either way,” he offered. “We’re growing up, Riley. At some point, we need to all move forward…that includes allowing our friendships to evolve. Who knows what’s going to happen a few years from now? You could get a job on the other side of the country while the rest of us are in New York. We could all end up in different cities with different lives. Life is going to happen whether or not you want it to and even if you’re not ready for it.”
He made sense. He made perfect sense, but was she ready to take that chance? “But does it have to change now? What if…what if everything changes and we end up drifting away from one another?”
“Wouldn’t that be better than drifting away without taking a chance?” He paused. “I don’t know what happened. I don’t know what’s going through his mind right now. I do know that he cares about you. I know that the last thing he would ever do is hurt you.” He wasn’t sure how far things had gotten between them, or even if she had any inkling about how he felt, but she had to know that what he felt was real. She wasn’t some fling. She never was.
“What if it doesn’t work out?” She looked down at her hands. She couldn’t believe she was bearing her soul to Zay at 5:30 in the morning, but she had to verbalize the stream of thoughts that had been flowing through her mind for most of their trip. “I’ve never been in a relationship and he…he’s been in more than I can count.” She leaned forward as she looked him in the eyes. “What if it ends? What then?”
He smiled at her. “But what if it doesn’t end?”
“It’s always ended before,” she reasoned. He always got bored and moved on to someone else after a few months.
“You forget that none of those girls are you.” He tapped his fingers against his leg as he contemplated his next words. Would Lucas murder him for telling her one of his secrets? He might, but what if a slight insight helped her to understand the depth of Lucas’s feelings for her? She deserved to know. “Do you want to know a good Lucas story?”
She chuckled softly. She always loved a good Lucas story. Ever since Zay came into their lives, he always had the best stories about him. She had learned a lot about Lucas’s childhood through Zay over the years. “What is it? Something about your rough and tumble days in Texas?”
Zay shook his head. “Did you know that at the beginning of senior year, Lucas applied to go to Texas A&M?” There. He said it. It was out there in the universe. He had held onto that little secret for a few years now, and while he promised Lucas he wouldn’t tell anyone, he knew that Riley deserved to know.
Riley frowned. “I didn’t know that.” She knew that A&M had always been the place where Lucas wanted to study veterinarian medicine, but when it came time to apply to colleges, he never mentioned to her that he actually applied.
“I figured that you didn’t know,” Zay paused as he watched a barrage of emotions cross Riley’s face. She seemed confused more than anything else, but perhaps, she was also slightly disappointed. Disappointed that he didn’t tell her about it? “He didn’t tell anyone,” he offered.
Her eyes fell to the ground. “He told you.”
“Only because I was there when he got the acceptance letter.” As soon as Zay saw the letter, Lucas swore him to secrecy about the whole thing. Lucas had initially applied just to see if he could get in. Zay knew he was tempted to accept, but he didn’t go. Instead, he chose to stay in New York and attend Columbia.
“He got in?” Of course he would have gotten in. He graduated near the top of their class with several academic and athletic honors. Riley always thought that Lucas could conquer the world if he really wanted to. Farkle may have been the genius in the group, but he wasn’t the only scholar. Lucas had to work hard, but Riley always knew he could do anything he set his mind to.
Zay nodded. “He got a full scholarship too.”
Riley took a deep breath. He had a full ride to a school that had one of the best veterinary programs in the country. “That was his dream school.” She had to ask the most obvious question, but she wasn’t sure if Zay would even know the answer. Still, she had to try. “Why…why did he stay in the city?”
Zay smirked. “I’ve spent the last few years trying to figure it out. It’s the million-dollar question. A full, free ride to his dream school and he turns it down for a partial scholarship to Columbia…which is a great school…but it was never really on his radar.” After the conversation with Lucas earlier, Zay realized that he had finally discovered the answer to the question. Although he didn’t know for sure, it was the only thing that made sense. “Riley…besides Maya…what type of girls has he dated?”
Riley flinched at the question because it seemed like such an odd transition in conversation. What did his preference in women have to do with where he ended up going to college? She shrugged. “Brunettes with brown eyes.”
He nodded. “Exactly.” Everything made sense to him now. It was the only logical explanation that made everything fit. It explained why he couldn’t stay in a relationship for very long and it explained why he decided to stay in the city.
Riley still wasn’t sure what sort of connection Zay was trying to make. Either he was too drunk to make sense or she was too drunk to understand it. “What are you saying?”
“They’re you.” He smirked. “He has a type…and that type is Riley Matthews.” He paused. “It’s taken me almost three years, but I feel like I finally know why he decided to stay in the city.” He tapped his fingers against his leg as he let his words sink in.
After a moment, he slowly stood up. “Anyway, I should probably go to bed and at least get a few hours of sleep in before I have to be on a golf course for most of the afternoon.” He watched as a wave of confusion crashed over her. He knew that he had already said too much, but he also knew that she deserved to know the truth. “Riley, if you care about him even half as much as he cares about you, I know for a fact that you two would be together forever.”
She looked up at him. How could Zay feel so confident in something that she wasn’t even sure she fully understood? “You sure about that?”
AU College Fic. Farkle never figured out how Riley really felt about Lucas, so it never got out. Now she’s turning 21 and the gang decides to go to Las Vegas to celebrate. Sometimes what happens in Vegas doesn’t always stay in Vegas.
Rating: M
Pairing: Rucas
Word Count: 8,708
Cross-posted at ff.net
Soundtrack (although not at all organized and subject to edits)
A/N: This song got dropped today, but it’s P E R F E C T to listen to as you read this chapter: “It Won’t Kill Ya” by The Chainsmokers.
Also, 21 is now rated M. And yes, I do take a little advantage of that switch in this chapter. This chapter is dedicated to @gmwpluto because she held my hand and kicked my butt throughout multiple rewrites and edits. She is the best sounding board ever cause she makes you kinda fight for what you’re doing and explain the reasoning behind it and yeah, I’m gonna get killed for this chapter, but I stand by everything that happens and considering the meltdown I had about it, I’m pleased with the result. Thank you Amy.
Her brain couldn’t process anything that was running through her chaotic mind. She had hurt him. She knew that much, but he had hurt her too. He accused her of trying to pit Asher against him, of trying to create this buffer between whatever was growing between them, but that wasn’t true. It wasn’t true because she knew that whatever this was couldn’t possibly last longer than the next few days. He had always been non-committal when it came to his girlfriends. A few weeks or even a few months would be the most she could possibly hope for. She wasn’t willing to sacrifice her friendship with him when they were in middle school, and as strained and practically non-existent as it was now, she still didn’t think she could bear it if he completely vanished from her life. That’s what would happen next, wouldn’t it? They would go out for a while and he would realize that she wasn’t what he was looking for, so he would break up with her. Afterward, she wouldn’t be able to be around him because it would hurt too much. Their friends would be forced to take sides, and the entire group would fall apart. She couldn’t let that happen.
As tears streamed down her cheeks, she knew that one day, she’d look back on this whole experience and know that she made the right decision by walking away from this before it was too late. As she watched the fountains dance to the beat of the music, her heart finally declared war on her brain.
She wasn’t sure how long she stayed on the patio by herself. Part of her had hoped that he would come back outside so they could go ahead and completely annihilate one another with more accusations and resentment. Maybe it would be better to get it over with in one fell swoop as opposed to prolonging the inevitable. It was her fault, anyway. She was the one who suggested they play ‘seven minutes in heaven’ for real. She was the one who could have walked away after her alarm went off the first time. Maybe then, they wouldn’t be like this. Maybe then they wouldn’t act like two complete idiots who, if she didn’t know any better, seemed to be completely in love with one another.
She scoffed as she wiped her eyes. That was impossible. While she knew that it was true on her end, she knew that if he wanted to figure everything out, if he really wanted to work through it, that he wouldn’t have left her the way he did.
She didn’t even want to have the stupid conversation in the first place—not now anyway. She was drunk. He was drunk. She knew it would end badly, but he kept pushing her until he finally figured it out.
As Riley turned away from the show to go back inside, her head was spinning. He knew now. After seven years of hiding it from him, he now knew that she didn’t step back from him because her feelings for him had changed.
She took a deep breath as she made her way back to the table. She had never felt more sober in her entire life. She hated it. She was never a huge drinker, and didn’t anticipate that trend changing just because it was suddenly legal for her to do so, but the battle her heart and brain waged was beginning to take its toll on her. All she wanted to do was crawl into bed and sleep through the next 48 hours. She wanted to wake up in her dorm room in New York and chalk this whole trip up to being a bad dream—a cautionary tale about the perils of giving into temptation.
Her eyes locked on to Maya’s as she slowly approached the table. She wrapped her arms around her body as a shiver rippled through her.
As soon as Maya saw Riley, she stood up and quickly made her way toward the quaking brunette. “Riley?” When Maya reached her, she rubbed Riley’s arms in an attempt to warm her up. “You’re freezing. Are you ok?”
Riley shook her head. She was the complete opposite of ok. How did everything get this complicated? She just wanted to go out and have some fun and now she wasn’t even sure which way was up anymore.
“What happened?”
Riley shook her head once more. She didn’t want to talk about it, not now anyway. “Maya, I-I need…I…” She looked all around them. What she was in search of, she didn’t even know. She suddenly wanted to claw through her own skin, shed herself of her own body and simply float away. This was all too much right now.
As her frantic eyes continued to search the room, she spotted him. He was seated at the main bar, and he wasn’t alone. He wasn’t with the same woman as before, but it was another blonde woman and she wasn’t alone either. A brunette woman had her arm looped through the blonde’s as they giggled at something Lucas said. Riley felt a fresh batch of tears sting her eyes as her mouth fell open.
Maya furrowed her eyebrows together when she noticed anguish slowly seep into Riley’s eyes. “Riley? Riley, what is it? Do we need to leave?”
Riley blinked several times as she stared at the three people who didn’t seem to have a clue that they were being watched. Lucas seemed completely unfazed by their earlier conversation. He laughed at something the blonde woman said, and made no move to remove the hand that the brunette woman had placed on his arm. Riley’s throat ran dry as the blonde slid onto the barstool on the other side of him. He was perfectly nestled between both girls now.
What a happy little threesome they seemed to be.
The agony Riley felt when she stood outside rapidly faded. Her desire to finish their conversation evaporated as she watched him take a sip of his scotch. From where she stood, their conversation was over and he seemed more than content enough with the outcome.
She’d be damned if she’d ever allow him to see how deeply he had gotten underneath her skin and into her heart. If he was about to fulfill his quest to bring multiple women back to the suite, then she was hell bent on doing what she had set out to do the entire night—not think and not second-guess a single move she made.
But first, she needed to reclaim the buzz she had before she stepped outside with him.
“No,” she finally answered as she turned back to Maya. She wiped her eyes. “I want to stay. I-Is my makeup ok?”
Maya wiped underneath Riley’s eyes to get rid of the slightly smudged eyeliner. “Yeah. You’re fine. Why? Riley, if you’re upset, then maybe we should—“
“Drink,” she offered even though she knew that wasn’t what Maya had in mind.
“No. Maybe we should call it a night?”
Riley shook her head. “No,” she answered as a slow smile tugged at the corners of her lips. “The night’s only just begun.” She glanced at the bar. “I just need to find my buzz again.”
Maya was grateful that Riley’s master plan only seemed to consist of more vodka and dancing. She had no idea what had transpired during Riley’s dance with Lucas, and while she wanted nothing more than to lock both of them in a closet and let them duke it out, she also knew that tonight wasn’t the best time to do it. Everyone was intoxicated and she knew that Riley’s emotions were at an all time high.
Although Riley had taken to dancing with any guy who showed a remote interest in her, Maya knew that it could only go so far as long as she were nearby. She was grateful that Zay and Farkle had joined them a few songs in. Initially, Farkle had only shown up to give them each another drink, but Riley insisted that he stay with them and dance for at least a few songs. She batted those beautiful brown eyes and told him that all she wanted for her birthday was to dance with her friends. Farkle never stood a chance. Her entire group of friends always ended up giving in when she pouted.
Maya noticed that not once since they hit the dance floor did Riley look back at Lucas. She considered it a small victory. She wanted nothing more than to see Riley and Lucas give it a shot, but she also knew nothing good would come out of a drunken conversation right now. They had a lot to work through and discuss. If they could make it through tonight, then maybe, just maybe, they would be able to work it out when their heads were a little clearer.
Riley laughed as she wrapped her arms around Zay’s neck and pressed her body against his. “Dance class has really paid off, huh,” she grinned as they moved to the beat of the club music.
“You all laughed at me in middle school, but it’s always been a lady magnet,” he answered a he focused on the best place to hold Riley. The last thing he wanted was to get in between whatever was going on with her and his best friend. Incurring the wrath of Lucas Friar was one thing he did not want to do tonight. He glanced over his shoulder as Maya cozied up behind him. He turned back to Riley as he gestured at the blonde behind him. “See? Total lady magnet.”
“You’re in the middle of a Riley and Maya sandwich,” Riley laughed as she wrapped her arms around Maya as the trio rocked to the beat of the moderately slow R & B song. “Do you know how many men would kill to be in your shoes right now?”
Zay chuckled nervously. She was right. He was nestled in between two beautiful women, and he knew damn well that if Lucas caught a glimpse of him right now that he might not live to see the sunrise. “I know of one guy who probably would like to kill me right now if he saw this.”
“Make way for me,” Farkle announced as he ducked in between Riley and Zay. The entire group laughed as Farkle slithered in between his friends.
“Farkle, I’m not that drunk yet,” Zay smiled before he spun around to dance with Maya. The genius was one of his best friends, but his dance moves could prove to be lethal. Farkle needed space to dance, and in his currently inebriated state, Zay wasn’t sure that he would understand that he only had a small space to work with.
Riley laughed as she placed her hands on Farkle’s shoulders. “Oh Farkle…how are you doing?”
“Pretty good right now,” he smiled as he placed his hands on her waist. He wasn’t really sure what he had been drinking or even how much he had. He had placed Zay in charge of everything he consumed since he had never been much of a drinker. “I can’t really feel my face right now.”
Riley’s eyes widened for a moment before she nearly doubled over in laughter. “Oh my God,” she snorted as she gasped for air. He couldn’t feel his face? She had never been that drunk in her life. That couldn’t possibly be normal, could it? “I am so not on your level yet, Farkle.”
“Try me,” he grinned. “I’m not kidding.”
“So, you can’t feel this?” She lightly touched his cheek.
He shook his head. “Not at all!”
She tapped his cheek as her smile widened. “And that?”
He shrugged. “Nope.”
She lightly smacked his cheek. “Still nothing?”
He laughed. “Not a thing.”
“Wow.” She was more than a little impressed. Maybe she should get Zay to dictate the rest of her drinks for the night? She moved her hand back down to his shoulder. “If you were ever going to get into a fight, tonight would be the night to do it, Farkle. Only…please don’t do that because then the night would be over and I’m having way too much fun to get kicked out of this club.” She spun around before she placed her hand over top of his as she moved her hips from side to side. “I love that you’re dancing right now,” she called out over her shoulder to him. She couldn’t remember the last time she had been able to dance with him. It had to have been high school.
“I told you guys that I would loosen up once we got here tonight,” he called out from behind her.
“I know, but I haven’t seen you have fun in a long time.” She spun back around to face him as the song ended.
He shrugged as a more upbeat song began to play. “Comes with the territory, I guess.” He leaned in to speak directly into her ear as the DJ increased the volume of the music. “I know you wanted this trip and it was your idea, but I needed it. I needed to spend time with you guys…get out of New York for a few days.”
Riley frowned at his words. He never talked about the breakup—not since the night it happened. She turned her head to speak in his ear. “Does it hurt? Seeing places that you shared with her day after day?”
He nodded. “Not as much as it used to, but sometimes I’ll walk past a coffee shop or restaurant or even somewhere that we only went to once, but I’ll think about her and it’s like…it’s like I can’t breathe.” He sighed. It was the worst form of torture he could possibly think of. “For six months I felt so claustrophobic everywhere I went. I thought I was going crazy.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “Maybe I am.”
“That’s how you know it was real. I know it doesn’t help anything, but we’re here for you. We’re all here for you, Farkle.”
“You know, the worst part is that…she’s gone. She’s still in the city, but Riley, she might as well be in another country. I haven’t talked to her since it happened…I don’t know if we’ll ever be able to be friends again.”
Riley nodded slowly. It made sense. Even in her muddled thoughts, it all made perfect sense. Her heart broke when he called her that night and told her that Smackle broke up with him. There wasn’t any build up or longstanding issue between them. She simply told him that her feelings for him had changed and while she wasn’t sure how or in what way, she needed to take some time for herself to figure it all out. Six months later and Farkle hadn’t heard a word from her. “So you not only lost someone you loved, but you also—“
“I lost my best friend.”
Riley’s eyes scanned the club. She couldn’t see much of anything past the dance area. Was he still here? Had he already left with those girls? She had easily been on the dance floor for half an hour, maybe longer than that. As Farkle’s words echoed through her hazy mind, her heart ached. Her brain was winning the battle, despite the fact that she had subconsciously turned off both organs the moment she saw Lucas with those women.
It wouldn’t take her long to find out where he was. As the small group made their way back to the table, she spotted Lucas, the blonde woman, and the brunette woman at their table with Asher and Dylan. Instead of sitting down or even acknowledging the strangers who seemed to be latched onto him, Riley headed directly toward the bar. The conversation with Farkle still rang in her ears as she ordered a shot. As soon as she downed it, the bartender smiled at her. “You’re the birthday girl, right?”
She cringed as her throat burned. She nodded as she sat the glass back down. “Yeah, I’m Riley. And you are?”
“Mark,” he smiled. “Listen, I know this might sound a little weird, but are you willing to help us out with something? I can guarantee you that you’ll have fun and you won’t have to pay for another drink tonight.”
She raised her eyebrows. She came here to have a memorable birthday. Judging by the smile the bartender gave her, she knew that she had to do whatever it was he wanted her to do. She needed some fun. “Mark, you had me at fun. What do you need me to do?”
Lucas looked up at the bar as he watched one of the bartenders whisper in Riley’s ear. When he saw her laugh in response, his jaw twitched. He couldn’t stand this. The air around them felt so thick. How was she able to laugh and carry on like this when the entire future of their already fragile friendship seemed so uncertain? He reluctantly looked away from her when he heard the cackling of the brunette seated next to him. Why did Dylan insist on inviting them back to their booth? He had hoped to pawn the women off on Asher and Dylan and kill two birds with one stone, but Dylan didn’t quite get the hint that Lucas had no interest in either woman. How could he when the one woman he wanted was so close, yet so far away from him?
He hated the way they left things outside. He hated that he stalked off, but he was so frustrated and so mad that she would think, for even a second, that if they became something more, that he would eventually end it. Somewhere in the back of his mind, he knew that he had earned the reputation he had for a reason, but she didn’t know the whole story.
“Why is she standing on top of the bar,” Zay suddenly asked as he watched one of the bartenders help Riley climb on the bar.
“Seriously?” Maya stood up as she turned toward the main bar. “I thought she was only going to get a drink…not let the whole world see up her dress,” she groaned as she watched Riley run a hand through her hair.
Lucas snapped his head up to look at Maya. “Excuse me?” He turned his head toward the brunette. Sure enough, Riley Matthews had climbed on top of the bar. Apparently the members of their table weren’t the only ones to notice as a group of guys crowded around her.
Maya glared at the back of Lucas’s head before she walked toward Riley. The others followed closely behind.
“Tonight at Hyde, we are very fortunate to help celebrate this beautiful woman’s 21st birthday!” Mark gestured to Riley who grinned when the crowd cheered. “And she has so graciously decided to help us deliver a round of shots for anyone who might be interested. It’s an apple pie shooter and the way it’s gonna work is that Amber will pour some apple juice into your mouth. After that, I’ll come by and add in some vodka, then Miss Riley over here will top it off with a dab of whipped cream!”
“Well,” Farkle smirked as he watched the bartender hand Riley a can of whipped cream, “She said she wanted to have fun tonight.”
“She’s making memories that she might not actually be able to remember tomorrow.” Zay glanced at Lucas. He could practically feel the anger and jealousy billowing from his best friend. At least that anger couldn’t possibly be directed at him.
As Mark grabbed a bottle of house vodka, he gestured to the area around them. “So, line up around the bar if you want one. First come, first served!”
“I don’t know about you guys,” Maya smirked as she slid up to the middle of the bar, “But I’m getting a free shot.” She couldn’t believe what was happening, but she had to admit that it would definitely make one hell of a story. Riley Matthews was serving whipped cream to a bunch of strangers on her 21st birthday. As she heard Riley laugh, Maya figured that maybe doing something a little crazy like this could be good for her. She had played it safe for her entire life. She was due for a semi-wild night—as long as it didn’t involve some sort of exchange of bodily fluids with a random stranger.
Most of the group followed Maya’s lead as they stood in front of the bar.
Lucas didn’t want to do it, but he knew there was no way she would willingly climb down and forget the whole thing. If he could prevent her from spraying whipped cream into just one stranger’s mouth, then he’d stomach what was sure to be a disgusting shot. Instead of lining up with the rest of his friends, he moved to the end of the bar. If he had any luck, he would be the last one. If he had a little more than luck—and if his brain hadn’t been completely thrashed by the jealousy he knew he’d have by watching her doing this—then maybe he could get her attention long enough to apologize for running away from her earlier.
He watched her slowly bend down to spray the whipped cream in the first few guys’ mouths. Lucas noticed that there were a few women by the bar, but most of the patrons consisted of guys—guys he knew couldn’t wait to get their chance to hit on Riley. Lucas’s focus never wavered as she moved from person to person. She laughed when she saw Maya and the guys about midway through her trek around the bar. After she squeezed some of the contents of the can into the blonde’s mouth, she kissed her cheek. Both girls giggled as Maya swallowed the shot.
Lucas noticed that Riley seemed to be getting more and more into what she was doing as she skipped down the line. He clenched his fist as she slowly slid her index finger down Asher’s cheek before she squeezed the whipped cream into his mouth. Did she know he was watching her? Was she purposefully trying to drive him insane with jealousy?
It was a great exercise in patience and test of his growth as a person to watch her casually flirt with about twenty-five random strangers. It felt like an eternity had passed by the time she reached him. Luckily, their friends had retreated back to the table, as had most of the other people who had gotten a shot.
As he opened his mouth for the apple juice and vodka, he wondered if she even noticed that he was there. As the two bartenders turned back to make drinks for the crowd that awaited them, Riley’s eyes finally locked onto his.
She was surprised to see him. She thought that if he had wanted a shot, he would have been lined up with the rest of their friends and the two girls he had been with for nearly an hour. She had never been so tempted in her life to drown the two women in whipped cream, but she managed to avoid a murder charge as she breezed by them. Now, as she looked down at Lucas, she wasn’t so sure she’d be as successful with him. She crouched down as she tucked a piece of hair behind her ear. She wasn’t sure that she had ever been this angry with him. It was new territory for her, but she gladly welcomed it compared to the agony she felt when she first saw him with the two girls. “Thanks for proving my point by walking away earlier,” she snarled before she sprayed the substance into his mouth.
Lucas swallowed the shot the moment she began to spray the cream into his mouth. He thought for sure she would try to use up whatever was left in that can on him in an attempt to cover him in the frothy concoction. While she did end up giving him more whipped cream after he swallowed, it wasn’t nearly enough to make him choke on it.
As she turned to leave, all thoughts of an apology escaped him. He wanted to apologize, but he couldn’t remember the speech he had formulated as he watched her dance around the bar. So, he acted completely on instinct when he grabbed her arm and gently tugged her back down to him. He lifted his head slightly as his lips met hers in a searing kiss.
The first thing Riley could taste was the whipped cream in his mouth. She was shocked that he had pulled her to him, but as she felt his tongue slip into her mouth, her anger melted into an unbridled passion that she had no idea how to subdue.
When she heard herself moan into his mouth, she snapped herself out of her daze. She pulled back from him without saying a word and turned to the bartenders. “Is that it,” she asked as she wiped a little bit of the whipped cream from her mouth.
“Not quite,” Mark smiled. “It is your birthday, and what good is a birthday without a birthday cake?”
Riley smiled as she spun around to see one of the other bartenders bring a cake over to her table. She quickly climbed down from the counter as she walked over to the chocolate cake lit up with sparkler candles. Lucas trailed several feet behind her as her friends sang “Happy Birthday” to her.
She pushed the brief interlude with Lucas to the back of her mind as she looked at the friends who surrounded her. This was the moment she knew she’d remember for the rest of her life. She had made it to twenty-one. She had no clue what the future held, but if this group of people remained in her life, she knew she’d be ready for anything.
After the song was over, Riley closed her eyes as she made a wish. Her wishes over the last eight years hadn’t changed, but this one was slightly different. It still centered on the Texan she had just kissed, but instead of wishing to be with him, she wished for some sort of sign to know what to do, whether to let go or to hang on. She pulled her hair back as she leaned over and blew out the candles.
Everyone around her cheered as she raised her head back up. “This is so incredible,” she happily smiled as she sat down in the booth. She turned to Farkle. “It’s perfect, Farkle. The place, the cake…everything.” She glanced around the club. “You know…if I had to pick anywhere in Vegas to celebrate my 21st, it would have been here…the fountains, the dancing, the ambience…it’s perfect.”
He smiled. “I wish I could take the credit for it, but I can’t.”
She frowned. “What are you talking about?” She thought Farkle had planned the entire trip out. If he didn’t set all of this up, then who did?
Farkle searched the club for his friend. He couldn’t believe that after everything, Lucas missed the cake being brought out, especially after how specific he had been about where and what cake to get. “I thought for sure he would have told you, but it makes sense why he didn’t. He’s not one to really brag, but…Lucas set up the whole thing.”
Riley glanced at Maya before she looked back at Farkle. “What are you talking about?”
“I had no idea where to even begin to look for a place. Lucas told me that he wanted to plan your birthday celebration. He’s the one who booked the table here, got us all into VIP, and he even picked out the cake.”
“He planned it?”
Farkle nodded. “I thought I knew you better than anyone…well, except for Maya, but…I think Lucas beat me on this one. This place screams Riley to me.”
Just then, Lucas walked around the table as he sat down at the other end of the booth. Riley couldn’t help but to stare at him. He planned the whole night? How did he pay for this? Riley didn’t even want to think about how much it all must have cost him.
She watched as the two girls she still didn’t know the names of turn their attention away from Dylan and back to Lucas. As she reached for the drink Maya ordered for her while she was on the bar, her inebriated brain began to weigh her options. On the one hand, she could continue to ignore him to the best of her ability and watch him accomplish the mission he had set out for himself at the beginning of the night—or—maybe she could be the mission.
As the vodka slipped past her lips, she figured that it would actually be pretty poetic to lose her virginity to him in Las Vegas on her 21st birthday. He had been her first everything—first date, first kiss, first boyfriend, first love. Why not complete the circle? Why couldn’t she be the hookup he craved tonight? It was only sex, right? If she could keep her heart silent, then maybe it would actually help her begin to move on. Maybe they wouldn’t be physically compatible? Maybe this was the first step to letting go?
She smirked as she continued to consume the contents of her glass. There wasn’t enough liquor in the world to convince her that sex with Lucas wouldn’t be good. A few heated kisses told her everything she needed to know about their physical compatibility. Still, she was feeling completely light and free. Maybe she needed one night of passion with him in order to finally close the door on her first love.
Once she finished the drink, she slowly stood up and walked to the other end of the booth.
Lucas’s attention immediately shifted to Riley the moment she stood up. He was more than a little surprised when she stopped right in front of him. He had no idea what to expect. Was she going to yell at him in front of everyone? Was she going to get back on the bar and do something else that would surely test his self-control?
“Hey Huckleberry,” she smirked as she casually drummed her fingers on top of the table. “Are we dancing or what?”
He knit his eyebrows together in confusion. He knew that he must have misheard her. She wanted to dance with him? After their argument outside and after everything that had transpired between them in the last 24 hours, she actually wanted to dance with him?
“It is my birthday.” Her smile never wavered as she watched him reach for his drink. She raised one inquisitive eyebrow at him as she waited for him to finish drinking the amber substance in his glass.
Lucas finished off his scotch and sat the glass down next to her hand before he looked back up at her. “Lead the way.”
He thought for sure that she would take him to where she had spent the better part of the night with most of their group. Instead of going to the dance floor, she led him back outside, back to their hidden corner, back into the darkness. Only a few people mingled outside, as the temperature must have dropped another five degrees in the hour since they were last out there. Riley felt a chill ripple through her as soon as she stepped outside, but she didn’t care. This was the only place she knew of that they could have a little bit of privacy. They were nowhere near the music, although they could still hear the bass beat as clear as day.
Riley didn’t say a word as she spun around and placed his hands on her waist.
“Riley, what are you doing?”
She wrapped her arms around his neck. “I don’t want to talk.” She knew that this would go a lot better if neither of them said a word. Every time one of them opened their mouths, they ended up in some ridiculous fight. If they could just somehow float together, let things happen naturally without having to discuss the past or what it all meant, then maybe they could work this out without a fight.
“What do you want to do?” Lucas swallowed as he stared at her. He had no idea what was going through her mind. She didn’t want to talk. That was fair enough. Every conversation they attempted in the last 24 hours was disastrous to say the least. He never wanted to ruin her birthday. If she wanted to dance with him in silence, then he would take that time trying to commit every millisecond of it to his memory.
“Have fun. Not think.” She shrugged her shoulders as she glanced at the fountains for a moment before she looked back at him. “I’ve spent the first twenty one years of my life thinking about every move I made…doing the right thing…saying the right things.” She shook her head. “I don’t want to do any of that tonight.” She was tired of having to be perfect all the time. She was tired of her brain stopping her from doing the things she wanted to do.
He sighed. Despite the canyon between them, he knew who she was. He had always known. “And what happens tomorrow when you wake up?” She was saying all of this now, but he knew that once she sobered up, she would regret it if she did something completely reckless.
She shrugged. “I don’t want to think about that.” Didn’t he understand? She wanted to give into her emotions for once. Maya always led with her heart while Riley had always led with her brain. Leading with her brain had only made a huge mess of everything, so why couldn’t she simply give into her feelings for one night? What was so terrible about that?
“But I do.” He wanted to step back from her. He wanted to remove his hands from her waist and go back inside, but he couldn’t. He wasn’t strong enough to separate himself from her right now. He was a man who had been starving for a third of his life over the woman who stood before him. At this second, he was holding the only thing he had ever really wanted. He couldn’t let go. Maybe if he was a little more sober, he could. Maybe if she wasn’t looking at him in the way he had always wanted her to, he could let her go and walk away.
“You’re not pulling away from me,” she murmured as she stepped forward and pressed her body against his. She lowered her right hand to the nape of his neck as her fingertips brushed through his hair. She bit her bottom lip as her eyes lowered to his lips.
“I need to,” he groaned as she leaned forward to kiss his cheek. The alcohol in his system worked against him as he felt himself slowly give into whatever she wanted to do. He knew that he was wrapped around her finger, but he never knew how much until tonight. He’d die to try to give her the world if she wanted it. He’d move heaven and earth for her if she asked him to.
“You don’t need to do anything,” she responded softly before she began to plant open-mouthed kisses along his jawline.
Lucas felt his earlier anger dissipate with every connection her lips made to his skin. It wasn’t fair. None of this was fair. Every single emotion he had felt tonight was placed into extremes. He was certain he had never been angrier with someone in his entire life, but at the same time, he knew that he had never loved her more. It wasn’t just the fact that she was stirring up every single hormone he possessed, but it was the fact that for the first time ever, he finally realized that she wanted him just as badly as he wanted her.
He swallowed as she moved her attention to the other side of his neck. He craned his neck back and stifled a moan as she scraped her teeth against the base of his neck. He was rapidly becoming putty in her hands. Whatever she wanted, he was prepared to give her. Anything—everything. He just had to know that she wanted him and only him.
Finding some inner strength that he didn’t know he possessed, he slowly moved his hands up to her shoulders as he nudged her back slightly.
Confused, Riley lifted her head. “Isn’t this what you want?”
The way her eyes had darkened nearly set off an explosion in the Texan’s mind. Dear God, he knew that no matter how much alcohol he consumed, he would never forget the way she looked at that exact moment. Her cheeks were slightly flushed, her breathing had become slightly labored, and the way she pursed her lips immediately made a certain body part of his throb in sheer anticipation. He knew he had to maintain his composure for at least another minute. He had to know she really wanted this and she wouldn’t claim it was some drunken mistake tomorrow. “Is it what you want?”
She smiled as she slowly, purposefully so, closed the space between them once more. “Yes,” she purred as her lips quickly covered his. She wanted to silence him before he had a chance to think, a chance to ruin whatever moment they could have together.
Lucas felt most of his remaining defenses slip away as her fingers slowly danced down his chest. As her tongue slipped into his mouth, his hands slid up her back as he quickly guided them further into their little oasis.
As soon as her back hit the wall, she shoved one of his hands down to her thigh. “I want to feel your hands all over me,” she murmured as she hooked one of her legs around his waist. She smashed her lips to his once again as she wanted nothing more than to feel him explore her entire body.
He squeezed her thigh as her tongue met his once more. When she moaned into his mouth, he felt the last shred of ‘Lucas the Good’ slip away. Somewhere in the back of his mind, he knew that while whatever they were doing was completely and utterly right, the timing of it and the location of it was not at all how he had imagined it. Still, the alcohol in his system and eight years of dreaming about the woman in his arms night after night tipped the scales into Lucas the not-so-Good’s favor. When she placed his hand on her thigh and told him that she wanted his hands all over her, he nearly took her right then and there. As soon as she moaned into his mouth, ‘Lucas the Good’ ceased to exist all together. His hand slowly crept up her thigh. He knew that if she didn’t want this, she would push his hand down, pull away from him and tell him that they were going too far.
But she didn’t. As her nails scraped across his back, she wiggled against him in a desperate attempt to get his fingers toward their destination quicker. She needed to feel him. She needed him to touch her in a way that no one else had before.
Up until that moment, Lucas didn’t know that his brain possessed an off switch. As his fingers slowly disappeared under her dress, Riley whimpered in sheer anticipation. How many times had he dreamt about them like this? How many times had he woken up and taken a cold shower because the woman he fantasized about wasn’t next to him?
“Please,” she murmured desperately in between kisses. “I want you to. I need you to.” Goose bumps peppered her entire body as she felt his fingers graze the outside of her underwear. “Please, Lucas.”
All he wanted to do was to make her happy and to make her feel good. She wanted this. He wanted this. As he opened his eyes, he noticed that hers were already opened as they continued to kiss one another. He looked for a sign of hesitation, any indication that it was merely the alcohol talking and not something she really wanted. It was the only thing that could possibly hold him back from doing this. A small smile tugged at the corner of her lips as she lightly bit his bottom lip. “Please,” she begged once more.
At that moment, no one on Earth could have resisted her.
She gasped as soon as she felt his fingers slide into her underwear. She dug her nails further into his back when his lips reclaimed hers while his fingers slowly explored a new uncharted territory. Was this real? As his fingers paid homage to her most private of regions, Riley sighed into his mouth. God, it felt so much better than she imagined, and it wasn’t even the real thing. Her entire body felt completely electrified by his motions. As insanely wonderful as it felt, she wanted more. This was becoming an addiction. He was becoming an addiction. She had to have more of this. She had to have more of him.
Lucas wished that she had left with him earlier when he mentioned it. It was a mile and a half back to their hotel, but with traffic, it could easily take 20 minutes to get back to their suite. He wasn’t sure about her, but he knew he couldn’t wait that long. He wasn’t even sure they could make it to a room at the Bellagio at the rate they were going.
Riley couldn’t stand it anymore. She thought she could be placated with a tease, with a glimpse into a world that had been forbidden for so long, but it only made her demand more. She dragged her fingernails down the length of his back before she brought them in between their bodies. As she lowered her lips to his neck, her fingers grazed the outside of his pants.
He groaned the moment he felt her fingertips against him. Did she have any clue how close he was to taking her right then and there? All it would take is one word, one indication of consent and he would happily spend the rest of the night—the rest of forever—worshipping her like the goddess she was.
He used his free hand to run through her slightly tangled hair. As she lifted her head up, he pulled her face to his in a scorching kiss.
Lucas quickened his pace as his mouth desperately sought contact with hers. Riley could hear her heart race in her ears as the pressure within her began to build more and more rapidly. She wasn’t exactly sure how she was able to pull in any oxygen between the breath Lucas commanded and the fact that his ministrations had already labored her breathing. She felt like she could pass out at any moment from sheer pleasure. If she died right here, she would die the happiest woman in the world. She never wanted this feeling to end.
He kissed her with every single feeling she was giving him in return. A lethal combination of love, lust, anger, jealousy, and passion swirled within him as he desperately tried to tell her everything she was doing to him without ever saying a word. He was a man possessed. He couldn’t control anything anymore. “Tell me,” he commanded as he slid his lips across her bare shoulder. His free hand fell to her lower back in order to support her when she threw her head back and desperately gasped for air. “Tell me that I’m the only one you want. Tell me you don’t want him. Tell me, Riley,” he pleaded as his lips brushed against her collarbone. “Tell me that when we wake up tomorrow, we’ll be together.” He kissed his way toward the base of her neck as he waited for her answer.
Riley’s heart pounded even harder as she listened to his pleas. As her mind desperately tried to fight through the thick fog of alcohol and lust, she replayed his words again. Be together as in dating? Her mind raced as the logical side of her brain tried to dissect his words and the meaning behind them. She couldn’t do this right now. She was hammered. She told him that she didn’t want to talk. She didn’t want to make a life altering decision while they were intoxicated.
She thought this would be easy. She thought that maybe they could get whatever this was out of their system tonight—chalk it up to the city, to the alcohol, to being young. She knew that on some level, she had waited for him, had wanted him to be her first because he had been her first everything else and that maybe she could begin to move on if she got some sort of closure from the last seven years. She knew that at least for her, it wouldn’t be so simple to walk away, but maybe it would be for him. Maybe getting the tension out of the way could somehow pave the way for them to repair their friendship. At least, that was what the inebriated side of her had foolishly thought.
She closed her eyes a newfound embarrassment filled her. For one moment, she had successfully turned off her brain. For one moment, she led with something other than the sense that had kept Lucas Friar at arm’s length for a third of her life. In one foolish moment of weakness, she might have just wrecked an eight-year friendship.
She slowly opened her eyes when she felt his lips slowly pull away from her neck. They weren’t on the same page at all. She knew that couldn’t risk this anymore than she already had. Her body still cried out for him, but her mind had finally taken control once again. She thought she could give into this for one night, but she wasn’t that kind of girl. She never was. “I can’t,” she answered weakly as she braced herself for the fallout she knew she deserved.
It felt like a bucket of cold water had been dumped on the Texan. He felt completely paralyzed as the weight of those two words fell on his shoulders. She had driven him completely insane. He never would have allowed things to get this far between them if he thought that she didn’t want to be with him when morning came. As he slowly pulled away from her, it felt as if a thousand knives had penetrated his heart. He couldn’t do this anymore. He couldn’t be around her while he was still in love with her. If the last seven years were any indication, he knew that trying to get over Riley would be nearly impossible. As he shoved his hands into his pockets, he knew that he had to get away from her, but first, before he threw himself off a cliff, he had to know why. “Why,” his voice cracked with the weight of emotion that flowed through his heart, “Why is it so hard for you to understand that I want to be with you?”
Riley slid her dress back down before she wrapped her arms around herself. She wanted to tell him it was because of what she had overheard earlier that night, but the real problem extended beyond that. “Because,” her voice shook, “it was so easy for you to accept what I told you we were and move on.” She looked down. “If you did it back then, I know that you’ll do it now.”
“But I didn’t accept it!” His eyes widened as he waited for her to say something else. Was there no other reason than the stupid label that she put on them when they were in middle school? “Don’t you get it, Riley? Everything that’s happened since then has been because of this ridiculous idea you got into your head that Maya and I liked one another.”
She cut her eyes up at him. “Didn’t you? Even for just a second?”
“No!” He shook his head as he tried to pull himself together long enough to explain to her what actually went on in his confused fifteen year old mind. “I thought that…that maybe there was…or that there could be…but I realized later that I only thought about that after you told us there was something there.” He scoffed when she said nothing in response. “Do you not understand that Maya and I only dated because the person we loved the most in this world told us that we had to see how we felt about one another? I’ve been chasing you ever since then.” He shook his head as he looked away from her. This was completely ridiculous. Was he supposed to pay for her decision for the rest of his life?
Riley furrowed her eyebrows. “What did you say?”
His eyes fell to the ground. “I’ve been chasing you, Riley.” Was she going to laugh in his face? Was she going to completely pulverize the last shred of hope he had for them?
She shook her head. “Before that.”
He took a moment to think about what he had actually revealed to her. When his words came back to him, he realized that after seven years, he finally told her how he felt. As he lifted his gaze, he knew that he had never intended for it to come out like that. He had always imagined some huge romantic reveal—something that would rival the white horse he rode in the gymnasium at John Quincy Adams Middle School—but perhaps some of the purest moments didn’t need to come with pomp and circumstance. Maybe they were best received when spoken from the heart, even if it’s outside of a club at 2:00 in the morning. “Maya and I only went out because the person we loved the most in this world told us that we had to see how we felt about one another.”
Riley was convinced that the entire earth was currently spinning at a rate that would perplex scientists for the rest of eternity. She swallowed in a desperate attempt to ensure that her voice didn’t shake when she finally asked him the most important question she had ever asked anyone. “You loved me?”
“Yes!” He looked all around them as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. Had she not been listening to anything he had said or done in the last 24 hours? Could she not see it before then? Did she never suspect how destroyed he was over what happened to them in middle school? Did she never catch on to the fact that his gaze always seemed to stay on her no matter where they were, who they were with, or what they were doing? Did the woman before him have zero clue that he not only wanted to give her the world but that she had been his entire world for the last eight years? “I loved you then,” he finally declared. As she lifted her eyebrows in surprise, he realized that she really had no idea what he had sacrificed just to be able to continue to orbit around her. “I love you now,” he confessed. She had to know. She had to see that this wasn’t some random hookup to him. She had to know that this was the culmination of seven years of emotional repression. “I never stopped loving you, even for a second…even though you told me that you only saw me as a brother.”
AU College Fic. Farkle never figured out how Riley really felt about Lucas, so it never got out. Now she’s turning 21 and the gang decides to go to Las Vegas to celebrate. Sometimes what happens in Vegas doesn’t always stay in Vegas.
Rating: M (because of language, situations, and it’s Vegas, soooo yeah)
Pairing: Rucas
Word Count: 9,778
Cross-posted at ff.net
Soundtrack (although not at all organized and subject to edits)
Riley blinked several times to pull herself out of the memories of that horrendous night. She could practically taste the bile that had risen up in the back of her throat. “On second thought,” Riley called out to Asher, “A double shot of vodka sounds perfect.” When he raised an eyebrow at her, she smiled. “I know I’m going to want liquor later when we go out, and you know the saying ‘beer before liquor, never sicker’?”
Asher smiled. “Of course. Do you want a chaser for it?”
Riley shook her head. She had never consumed a shot without any sort of chaser, but she was on a mission. She had to get the memories of that stupid party out of her head and the quickest way to do that was to drink. She didn’t want to take the time to chase anything. She wanted to feel the vodka slowly burn down her throat. She wanted to feel something other than the emotional torture she had continued to put herself through over the last several years. It wasn’t healthy. None of it was. She wanted to forget that stupid dance. She wanted to forget the way his eyes pierced through her body and into her soul. She wanted to forget how he made her feel like she was the only girl in the world in those four minutes. One thing she didn’t want to forget was the sight of him wrapped up in the girl who would later become one of his many girlfriends. No, that memory had to stay. It was one of the few things that had kept her tethered to Earth after those 21 minutes spent with him the previous night.
“Good idea,” Lucas smirked, completely unaware of the brunette’s train of thought. He assumed that she changed her drink order to prove some stubborn point that she wouldn’t allow herself to be put in a situation like that again. It stung, but he knew it was the nature of the beast when trying to get under her skin. At the same time, he needed her to know that he had thought of those four minutes quite often. “I’d hate to have a repeat of the last time.” That had to be the biggest lie he had ever uttered. He was more than hoping for a repeat of last time. They never got to finish that dance. He never got the chance to prove her wrong, that they weren’t just good friends. He needed that. He had to show her that what happened last night wasn’t a fluke. They were made for one another.
He had tried to play by her rules. He tried to move on and forget her, but it didn’t work. It never worked. He tried everything he could think of, but it always came back to her. He knew that he could lose her forever, and that their fragile friendship wouldn’t survive the aftermath, but as the minutes slowly ticked on by, he knew that he had to take that chance. He couldn’t hide this any longer. He was angry at her for what she told him at the Dam. Oh, he was more than livid with her about it and about the fact that she was trying to make him jealous. She knew that if she flirted with Asher, he would lose his cool. After all, he had a history of being jealous of any guy Riley gave any attention to—the most notable being Charlie Gardner. Well, if she was determined to put someone in between them, then he was determined to draw her out from behind that barrier. He tried to ignore them at the restaurant, but it only stoked the fire that was threatening to erupt within him. If he could get under her skin a little bit, maybe he would distract her enough to where she would forget about Asher. He wasn’t part of this. This was about him and her. Maybe if he could keep her engaged in a conversation, even if it was a heated one, then maybe then they could stop whatever game they playing and actually talk about how they really felt.
Riley bit the inside of her cheek to keep from screaming or to keep herself from crying, she wasn’t sure which. Why was he being so mean? Were those four minutes so completely unbearable for him that he had to throw it in her face? Not to mention having to watch him suck face with a near perfect stranger an hour after it. That was the night she decided she had to figure out a way to push him away. Yes, they went to the film series at NYU that fall, but those screenings were the only real time she saw him. She knew they wouldn’t have much time to talk, and it was her way of slowly letting go. As she turned to look at him, she wasn’t sure how she would ever be able to fully let go of him. She hadn’t been able to yet, and that was before the events of the last 24 hours. Was she forever doomed to spend her life basking in the beauty and subsequent heart wrenching anguish of those 21 glorious minutes with him in that hot tub? Was he going to torment her in front of everyone for her four-minute dive into a world that could never be her own? Was he getting her back for turning him down earlier? Couldn’t he see that those pick-up lines weren’t going erase seven years of having to witness him parade around girl after girl in front of her? Riley had to act like his words had no effect on her. So, she tilted her head to the side as she pursed her lips. “That was the night you met Lauren, right?”
Lucas’s smile slowly faded as he looked into her smoldering orbs. He could no longer see where her pupils ended and irises began. He didn’t mention the party to bring up anyone or anything other than their little interlude in the living room. He certainly didn’t want to bring up one of the worst lapses in judgment he had ever committed. He knew she saw it. Zay told him as much the next day. He wanted to talk to her, explain that he was only trying to do what she had always told him to, but he didn’t. She told Maya that she still saw him as a friend, even after what he thought had been a real moment between them. There was no use in trying to explain that night to her. She never asked and he was too embarrassed to ever try to explain it. “Yeah,” he muttered as he turned away from her.
Dylan frowned as he slid into the seat on the other side of Lucas. “Who’s Lauren?”
“A girl I went out with for a few months freshman year,” Lucas answered as he looked up at Zay. His frown deepened when Zay’s lips curled up into a grin. Was everyone delighting in his past mistakes? How had it all spun against him so quickly?
“They met at a party,” Riley added. “I think his lips fell onto hers or hers fell onto his. I forget the story.”
Zay had no idea what Lucas was up to, especially when he mentioned their first college party. The scowl on his face told him that whatever plan he had was rapidly backfiring. “What do you want to drink?”
‘Finally,’ Lucas thought as he took a breath, ‘A little bit of help.’ “I’m going to keep it classy tonight,” Lucas began as he tried to rebound from Riley’s comeback. He smiled as he tapped his fingers against the counter. “In honor of the fact that we’re all dressed up, and I’m sure, will all act like grown ups tonight…how about a nice scotch?”
Riley rolled her eyes as she leaned back in her seat. She crossed her legs before she placed her forearm on the counter. It was her turn to lightly tap her fingernails on the counter as she eyed him from head to toe. “You drink whiskey all the time. Scotch isn’t that far off.”
Lucas inhaled a shaky breath as he watched the brunette cross her legs. He wasn’t sure if she was doing it to torture him for bringing up that party, or if she was simply unaware of the fact that every single move she made pushed him further toward the edge of his sanity. He desperately wanted to pull her to him at that moment, but instead, he stood up and leaned in to whisper in her ear. “Are you really that concerned with what I put in my body?” His voice was deep and husky, full of pent up emotions that he had been able to keep at bay for years. He hadn’t had a drop of alcohol and yet, he was already coming apart at the seams. He knew at that moment that everything was going to come to a head tonight.
Goose bumps peppered the entire right side of her body as he whispered to her. As Riley reminded herself to breathe—in a desperate attempt to settle her rapidly unraveling nerves—she felt slightly lightheaded by the scent of his cologne. That smell was uniquely Lucas, so as she breathed it in, a million memories careened back to her, including those stolen moments at the Hoover Dam. She had to get a grip on reality. What was taking Asher so long with her drink? It was just a stupid glass of vodka. She cleared her throat before she forced herself to rotate her head in order to lock eyes with him. Their faces were mere inches apart. All it would take was for one of them to lean in a few insignificant inches to knock down the rapidly building tension between them. Riley would be damned if she gave into his biting comments. She had to be strong. She couldn’t let him see that everything he did affected her in some way, whether it was throwing their past in her face or ignoring her completely as he did at dinner. “Do whatever the hell you want to, Lucas,” she practically snarled before she turned back around to watch Asher pour her vodka into a glass.
Lucas’s smile didn’t waver as he slid back onto his chair. Inwardly, he knew that acting like a pompous ass wouldn’t get him anywhere with Riley, but he had to hold her attention. Maybe if the others wandered into the other room to play pool or something, he could talk to her about what happened earlier, explain that he wasn’t the guy she thought he was. Still, he knew that the odds of her putting herself into a situation where they would be alone would be very slim. So, Lucas decided to throw in a little honesty, even amongst their friends. He didn’t care what they thought, not about this. He didn’t care if they found out about their hookup. Maybe it would get Asher to back off. “Already tried to,” he sighed as he stared at the brunette next to him. “I got shot down.”
“Who shot you down,” Dylan asked him as he looked at the incredible liquor collection on the back wall of the bar. “For as long as I’ve known you, I don’t think any woman has been able to resist that southern charm.”
Lucas was suddenly very grateful for Dylan’s presence tonight. He only needed one person to ask the obvious. “Ah, I was bound to get turned down some day,” he drawled out as he turned to address Dylan. “The joke’s on her though because I could have given her something that would have lasted a lifetime.”
“And what was that,” Riley asked him as Asher placed the glass of vodka from her. She picked it up as she slid out of her seat. She was tired of whatever game he was playing with her. She knew that her heart would ache no matter what he did, but whatever this was, was more than she could bear at the moment. She was more prepared for him to stay away from her tonight. She thought for sure that he would be too preoccupied coming up with a game plan to get a group of co-eds back to the suite than to try to get under her skin. “An STD?”
“Woah,” Dylan’s eyes widened as he released a low whistle. “That was a major burn, Riley.”
Riley raised her glass to the Texan before she threw the contents back. She could feel every drop of it burn her throat as it slid down to her stomach. Part of her wanted a chaser, something to soothe the burning sensation she felt, but she’d much rather focus on that than whatever conversation she was in the middle of. She was furious with him. He had completely shifted her entire world and the moment she thought that maybe they could talk about it, he tells Zay that he wants to have a ‘real’ Vegas experience. “You know what Dylan,” she began as she sat the empty glass on the counter, “That’s probably the exact same thing that poor girl would have eventually said to him if she hadn’t turned him down.” She immediately regretted her words. She thought being cold would make her feel better, but she couldn’t do it. She wasn’t this person. She wanted to be happy. She wanted to have a good time. She didn’t want to think about the past. If only she hadn’t gotten into that stupid hot tub with him.
Lucas said nothing as he waited for Zay to pour him a drink. He knew he should drop it, and consider this round a loss, but her comments felt like nothing short of a slap in the face. She was the one who turned him down. Why was she taking cheap shots at him? As Zay sat his drink in front of Lucas, he looked at the amber liquid for a long moment. She had no clue who he was. That realization alone was enough to send him for a loop. “You’re one to talk,” he mumbled before he took a sip of his scotch. As soon as the words left him, he regretted it. The last thing he wanted was to start an ethical argument with her.
Riley shook her head as she processed his mumbled reply. “Excuse me,” she snarled as she narrowed her eyes at him.
“Nothing,” he answered before he downed the rest of his drink. “Zay, I need another.”
“Ok,” Zay slowly answered as he took the glass. He wasn’t sure what was about to happen between his enraged friends. It was definitely a cheap shot by Riley to insinuate that Lucas had an STD, but Lucas had been trying to get under her skin for the last ten minutes. Everyone in the room knew it—they just didn’t know why.
“He’s going to need more than that in a minute,” Riley responded darkly. She wasn’t about to let that comment slide—not from him. “What is your problem?”
“I don’t have a problem.” Lucas stared straight ahead at the bar as he answered her as evenly as he could. He knew that if he took one look at her, it would all fall apart. He thought that he would be used to her rejection, but for some reason, it felt so much worse this time. Maybe it was because he really put himself out there at the Dam. Maybe it was because this time he really tried to fight for her and she didn’t seem to care. Maybe it was time to say goodbye. First thing’s first. He had to get through the rest of this trip. “So, are we good?”
Riley stared at the glass on the counter for a long moment before she looked back at him. She had always known that she was going to get drunk for her 21st birthday. Now, she had a new goal in mind. She wanted to feel completely numb. For one night, she wanted to feel nothing. “As long as you keep the snide comments to yourself.”
He tapped his fingers on the counter three times before he finally turned to face her. “Likewise.”
Riley looked over her shoulder. “Asher, could you make me another one, please?” She gave him a smile as he reached for her glass. As she waited for him to pour her another drink, she looked back Lucas. “Fine.”
She was nearly numb by the time they finally reached Hyde. That was what she needed, what she had to be in order to forget everything else that had happened on this trip. She wanted to have fun tonight. She wanted to ring in 21 the way she wanted to ring in birthdays 15-20—without Lucas Friar on her mind the entire time.
By the time the group reached their table, midnight struck. Everyone at the table cheered and hugged the birthday girl as Maya bought the first round of drinks for everyone. When Farkle tried to protest, Maya held up a hand to him. “You’ve done so much for us on this trip, Farkle. I want to do this one.”
“We have such a good view of the Bellagio Fountains,” Riley smiled as she reached for her drink. This place was so perfect. She could get up and dance whenever she felt like it. She could go into one of the side rooms to watch the fountains. She could hang out in their booth. The ambience was perfect. The lights were dimmed and everyone was dressed to the nine’s. She didn’t feel too crowded. She had always dreamt of ringing in twenty-one like this. Maybe this year would be her year.
“Yeah, you can go on the patio out there and watch the show if you want to,” Farkle mentioned as he gestured in the direction toward the fountains.
“I will definitely be going out there at some point tonight.” She smiled softly as she looked around the club once more. “I know this trip has gone by so quickly already, but I just want to take a moment to thank all of you for being here.” She glanced at the drink in her hands before she looked up at the friends who surrounded her. “I couldn’t imagine a better way to ring in my 21st year.” She raised her glass. “Cheers to you guys…for being the best friends anyone could ask for.”
“Cheers to you,” Zay told her. “I think it’s safe to say that without you, the rest of us wouldn’t be friends. You’re the heartbeat of this little family, Riley.”
Riley smiled at him. “Thank you, Zay.”
“Ok, ok,” Maya shook her head. “I’m not going to get emotional. Tonight is for fun, only.” She looked all around them as she sipped on her drink. She grinned when she noticed the crowd of people dancing across the room. This was exactly what she had in mind to celebrate her best friend’s birthday. “Come on!” Maya sat her drink down on the table before she stood up and reached for Riley’s hand. “Let’s go dance!”
As Maya pulled her away, Riley forced herself not to look back at the group. Their little argument at the suite aside, she had done a pretty good job so far of creating some much-needed space between her and Lucas. It was pretty easy to do considering the fact that he hadn’t said much of anything to her since his biting comment about her one and only foray into the world of beer.
Everything had changed between them that night. Before then, she had been able to accept the fact that she was the one who created this whole situation by lying to him, but after that dance, after knowing that her feelings for him were stronger than she even realized, she knew that for the sake of her sanity, she had to step back, at least until she was able to move on.
Two years later, and she was still stuck, but now, it was so much worse than that night. She had actually tasted the forbidden fruit this time. Yes, her first kiss was with him on the subway when they were in seventh grade, but did that really count for anything? It was barely a peck and while she felt a little something at the time, it didn’t even compare to the fire his lips ignited when they brushed against her skin. As the alcohol danced through her system, the memory of his lips on her sent an electrical charge throughout her entire body. She thought consuming alcohol would allow her to forget him for a little while, but instead, it forced her to confront the fact that all he had to do was say the word and she would willingly give him every square inch of her body.
As she and Maya danced to the beat of the song, Riley closed her eyes when she could practically feel his hands slide across her body as he did that night two years ago. She had to finally admit to herself that their four-minute dance last year left her wanting more—so much more. Of course, a bucket of cold water had been dumped on her when she saw him devouring Lauren Montgomery’s face an hour later. Maybe that was why she had been able to resist him until now.
When she opened her eyes, she finally glanced back at their table. She spotted the guys in the booth, but quickly noticed that Lucas wasn’t with them. She frowned as she instinctively searched for him. Her heart dropped when she finally spotted him at the back bar. His elbow was propped up against the counter, his chin rested in the palm of his hand as he spoke with a drop-dead gorgeous blonde. Her stomach churned when she saw the smile plastered on his face. His earlier comments to Zay came careening back to her as she helplessly stared at the pair. It was happening all over again, only this time, it was going to hurt so much more.
Maya turned her head the moment she saw Riley’s smile falter. It took her a moment, but when she spotted him, Maya rolled her eyes. “I’m sure it’s nothing,” she told Riley as she turned back around to face her friend.
Riley took a deep breath as she forced herself to look away from the pair. They were barely inside of the club and he had already met someone. “She’s blonde. That’s…a change of pace.”
“Riley, come on! He was telling you a few hours ago how he wanted to be with you. Do you really think he’ll come to a bar and hit on the first girl he sees?” Maya felt that she knew Lucas pretty well. He wasn’t the same guy he was in middle school, but she was fairly certain she knew how he felt about Riley. There was no way that he would go out on Riley’s birthday and pick up a random girl hours after telling her that he wanted to be with her. Had he done some bone headed things over the last few years? Absolutely, but to Maya’s knowledge, he had never set out to purposefully hurt Riley. Even if she was resistant to their conversation at the Dam, Maya refused to believe that he would suddenly seek revenge on her. If he really loved her, if he really wanted a chance with her, he wouldn’t pick up a stranger tonight. Maya knew that, and she knew that Lucas knew that too.
But Riley didn’t know that. Riley only knew what she overheard earlier in the evening and what she had witnessed two years ago. If his comment earlier hadn’t stirred up all the memories of their first college party, then seeing him talking with that blonde woman would have. Riley looked down at the ground as she slowed her movements.
Maya frowned as she stopped dancing. “Riley? What aren’t you telling me?”
“Nothing.” She looked back up at Maya. “It’s nothing,” she answered a little stronger. “It doesn’t matter. He wants to have a good time tonight…and so do I.” She tossed her hair to the side and closed her eyes as she tried to lose herself in the music instead of drowning in the memories of him. “You know what they say,” she began as her eyes remained closed, “what happens in Vegas…”
“Yeah…for most people, but not for Riley Matthews.” She glanced at Lucas before she turned back to the brunette once more. She had no idea what Lucas was doing at the bar with the blonde girl, but there had to be some logical explanation for it. There was no way he would give up on Riley in the middle of one conversation about their feelings for one another. Granted, Riley was a lot better at hiding her feelings than Lucas was, but Maya could tell that cracks were forming in the wall Riley had built around her heart. It was only a matter of time before everything came out. “You have the biggest heart of anyone I know. It’s a blessing and a curse sometimes.”
Riley shrugged. She had spent the first twenty-one years of her life playing everything safe, putting everyone else in front of her. Maybe tonight she could be a little selfish. Maybe she could make a mistake and have it not be the end of the world. Maybe she could act as careless as him. Maybe, for one night, she could send her brain and her heart on a little vacation and just enjoy being young. Wasn’t that what this entire trip was about? “Maybe just this once I could be that person.”
Maya stopped dancing as she reached for Riley’s hands. She was going to do her best to keep her eyes on the brunette tonight, but she also knew that if Riley wanted to do something stupid and reckless, nothing would stop her. “Please don’t get hurt. That’s all I’m asking.”
Riley nodded as she squeezed Maya’s hands. “I won’t. That’s why I’m doing what I’m doing…so I won’t get hurt and so I can enjoy my birthday.”
An hour into being at Hyde and he felt like a complete stalker. That was the only way to describe it. He had become Lucas Friar: stalker of Riley Matthews. He had kept an eye on her the entire time she was on the dance floor, even when that blonde woman tried to talk to him. He briefly entertained the idea of doing something ridiculously stupid just to try to forget about his rejection for a few miserable moments, but when Riley’s face flashed in his mind, he knew he’d never be able to do it. He was furious with her, that hadn’t changed, but he wasn’t about to slam the door closed on them forever. He had waited seven years. He couldn’t give up after one unfinished conversation.
So, he politely walked away from the woman once he got his second drink. As he settled back in his seat, he spotted Riley on the dance floor. She danced with Maya for a few songs, then Asher and Dylan stepped in and danced with them as one cohesive unit. Gradually, they broke off into pairs. He wasn’t sure how long Asher danced with her, but Lucas was well into his third scotch when the idea of cutting in hit him. He was trying so hard to let her do what she wanted. He didn’t want to be the guy who had to stake his claim on anyone. She was single, as was Asher. If they wanted to dry-hump on the dance floor, then Lucas should have the grace to let them do just that. He knew that if he exploded, if he stalked to the dance floor and barged in, it would only make her angrier. So, he desperately tried to keep his distance from the brunette while she was on the dance floor with Asher, but with every passing second, the inner voice he had been able to quell for so long threatened to burst. With every dance they shared, Riley and Asher’s initial awkwardness faded as they physically drew closer to one another.
He couldn’t stand it. Asher was one of his oldest friends, but Riley was his heart—fight or no fight, misunderstanding or not. He hoped that they would stop soon. His will was rapidly fading. He was either about to make a complete jackass of himself on the dance floor or bolt to the nearest exit. As he sat the empty glass down on the table, he knew that he wasn’t nearly drunk enough to do both. His emotions were threatening to boil over, but he still managed to maintain some of his sensibilities.
After awhile, he wasn’t sure how much alcohol he had consumed in that first hour. All he knew was that the bartender swiped his credit card, which set him up with an open tab. He had hoped that eventually, the alcohol would dull his senses and allow him to endure the show he felt forced to watch, but instead, with every drink, with every fleeting moment, his jealousy grew stronger and stronger. All he wanted to do was tell her just how much seeing Asher and her on the dance floor affected him. He was losing his grip on reality. Seven years of pent up emotions were swirling within him, and he wasn’t sure how much longer he could keep it all in.
Riley fanned herself as she made her way back to the table. She had no idea how long she and Maya had been on the dance floor with the guys. All she knew was that she felt much better about everything that had happened earlier in the evening. She was there to have fun with her friends, and her time on the dance floor definitely provided her with a much-needed distraction.
When she reached the table, she was mildly surprised to see Lucas sitting with the guys sans the blonde woman. The endorphins swirling through her mind protected her from everything her heart was feeling. “It’s warm out there.”
“Drink this,” Zay instructed as he handed her a drink.
“Oh, this looks fruity,” she grinned as she examined the frothy, pink drink in her hands. She took a sip. “Oh, this is amazing!” It was cold and sweet—exactly the combination she craved at the moment. She took another huge sip as she bobbed her head to the beat of the song.
“Yeah, the bartender wouldn’t tell me what’s in it,” Zay answered, “I just said make the birthday girl something with strawberries.”
“It’s delicious!” She took another long sip as she swayed her body to the music.
He wanted to wait until they were both sober. He wanted to wait until it wasn’t her birthday. He wanted to hold off just a little while longer so they could really talk without an audience, but needing and wanting were two very different things. He knew he wouldn’t be able to stand it if she got back on that dance floor with Asher. He knew that he would explode and do something even stupider than what he did at that ridiculous party. He only needed a few minutes. He only needed forever. So, he finished off the scotch in his hands before he sat the glass down on the table and stood up. “Dylan, can you order me another one?”
“Yeah, sure. Where are you going?”
“Well,” he began as walked toward Riley, “It’s Riley’s birthday and I would like to dance with her. That is, if it’s ok with her?”
Riley nearly spit out her drink at his question. He wanted to dance with her? Had she heard him correctly? She thought for sure that he would want to stay as far away from her as humanly possible after their biting exchange in the suite.
She had no idea what she was going to do as she took a few more sips of the drink. Was she strong enough to handle one dance with him? Her track record wasn’t so good, and she was way more intoxicated now than she had been at that party. At the same time, she couldn’t help but to feel like he was challenging her somehow and she wasn’t about to back down from it. “Sure,” she answered as she sat her drink down.
He couldn’t help the smile that crossed his lips. He honestly didn’t expect her to agree to it. Was he actually going to get a few minutes alone with her? “Follow me,” he instructed as he offered his hand to her.
Riley looked down at it for a long moment before she placed her hands in his.
As they wandered through the club, she thought for sure that he would take her to the area where she danced with Maya and Asher, but instead, he turned left and led her outside. It was a much less crowded space. There were only a few people standing around due to the fact that it was freezing outside. Riley eagerly welcomed the cold chill. It felt good considering how overheated she felt inside. She smiled when she spotted a few couples dancing closely with one another. Other people seemed entranced by the Bellagio fountain show. As Lucas led her to a small corner, she couldn’t help but to notice that they were secluded from everyone else—even those who were outside with them. “Lucas, I think most people are dancing inside.”
“I know,” he responded as he turned to face her. “It’s why I brought you out here…away from everyone…away from the possibility of being interrupted again…somewhere that the music wasn’t quite so loud so that maybe for five minutes, we can be us…and not the us that we’ve been the last two days and definitely not the us we’ve been for the last seven years.” He gave her a small smile. “I want us to be the people we were before it all got complicated.” He slowly brought her hand around his neck before he lowered his hands to her waist.
As they began to sway to a beat that in no way aligned with the pulsating club music inside, Riley took a deep breath. “That…that was a really long time ago.”
“You don’t think we could ever be like that again?”
She shrugged. It wasn’t a simple yes or no question, but it was something that Riley had thought about for years. She still wasn’t sure of the answer. “We grew up. A lot has changed.” As she looked into his eyes, the intensity of his stare nearly made her knees buckle from underneath her. They had only been alone for a few seconds, but her body was already betraying her attempt at remaining guarded. It took her an hour to put the past out of her mind, and now, he wanted to bring it back up. She laughed nervously as she forced herself to look over his shoulder at the fountains. “I’m really not sober enough to have this conversation right now. Maybe we can wait until—“
“I can’t wait anymore.” He waited until she slowly lifted her gaze back to his before he continued. “Riley, please tell me what’s going on.” When she didn’t reply, he felt his carefully constructed walls come crashing down. He closed his eyes as he lowered his head to rest against hers. There was nothing more he wanted in that moment than a few minutes of honest clarity between them. Quite often over the last seven years, he had planned out several different scenarios for how he would do this, what he would say, how he would act, but all of that planning, of standing in front of his mirror and rehearsing, was for nothing. He could only say what he felt, and what he felt was unlike anything he had ever known before. His voice trembled when his pleas didn’t elicit a reaction from her. “I know you feel this too. I don’t want to fight. I just want to figure this out.” He swallowed harshly as he closed his eyes. He knew he had to brace himself for her rejection. “Please say something,” he begged as his voice cracked slightly.
“I don’t know,” she finally whimpered as she closed her eyes. Her heart raced from the sheer proximity of him. Her brain attempted to clear out the alcohol-induced haze she had eagerly welcomed not five minutes earlier, to no avail. This was too much for her to handle right now. She couldn’t think about something like right now—not after their conversation earlier and not after the all of the drinks they had consumed. Was he saying this just because he was drunk? Would he wake up tomorrow and regret this entire conversation? She couldn’t let her guard down while they were inebriated. It would hurt way too much if she found out that it wasn’t real.
Lucas took a deep breath as he pulled back from her. He knew he was putting a lot of pressure on her, but he had finally cracked. He wasn’t sure if it was because of what happened last night, that afternoon, or if after seven years, he had finally reached his limit, but either way, he didn’t care to hide from her anymore. He wanted her to remember the only decent part of the night of that party. He wanted her to remember just how amazing last night was. So, for a third time, he lifted his left hand in order to tuck her hair behind her ear as a soft smile slowly formed on his lips. “You’re driving me crazy, you know that?” His words seemed accusatory, but his delivery was so soft and reverent that it felt like a compliment.
Riley shivered as he tucked her hair behind her ear. Suddenly, the simple gesture seemed to mean so much more than what it was. She took a shaky breath as he leaned in closer to her. Her heart pounded even harder when she felt his lips lightly brush against her cheek. She closed her eyes at the sensation. How could a simple kiss on the cheek send a wave of excitement throughout her entire body and into her very core?
Because it was from him.
When she didn’t push him away, he pressed his lips to her cheek once more before he began to kiss along her jawline as he slowly made his way toward her neck. The only thought running through Lucas’s mind was that he had to be close to her. Whatever she wanted, he would give her. Thank God it appeared that she did not want him to stop his slow decent to the base of her neck.
Riley’s body betrayed her as she shivered against the feeling of his lips across her skin. She felt goose bumps instantly pop up along her arms and neck as he moved her hair to the side before he finally lowered his lips to the base of her neck. She slowly slid her hands down from the nape of his neck to his shoulders and finally his biceps as she leaned her head back to allow him better access to the flesh that he was currently adulating. “That feels so good,” she breathed as she quickly ascended back into the heavens he had sent her to last night.
He smiled against her neck while he placed his hands on her lower back. He nudged her forward in order to close what little space remained between them. He didn’t want to let her go. He wasn’t even sure if he could at this point. Whatever was flowing through him at the moment had to be flowing through her too. Something this powerful, this intense couldn’t possibly be one sided. He detached his lips from her neck as he lifted his head to look into her eyes. He had to know what was on her mind. He noticed that her lips were slightly parted and her eyes were closed. Was she was thinking the same thing he was? Did she crave this as much as he always had? Did she need him just as badly as he needed her? As he cupped her cheek, she slowly opened her eyes. As they stared at one another, he lightly ran his thumb across her bottom lip. God, he wanted to kiss her again.
“We shouldn’t do this,” she breathed. As the words tumbled from her, she knew that there was nothing she wanted more than to feel his lips and hands explore every square inch of her body. This felt too good. He felt too good.
“You keep saying that, but we keep doing it anyway,” he answered just as softly as he lowered his head. If she wanted to stop this, she would. If she wanted to go back inside and forget the whole thing, then she would. Only, she wasn’t moving away from him. As he inched closer to the sweet utopia that her lips possessed, he held his breath. When she closed her eyes and licked her lips in anticipation, he nearly groaned. That was the reassurance he needed. He now knew that she had been anticipating this reunion as much as he had.
The logical part of her brain that had stopped them earlier that day was long gone. It was replaced by the wonderful buzz that afforded her the chance to simply enjoy this moment. This was what she needed. She needed a night of recklessness. She needed to not think and simply give into what she had deprived herself of. When his lips finally brushed against hers, she realized that this was the perfect birthday present: another stolen moment with him. Despite the fighting and the unresolved anger that still simmered between them, nothing felt more truthful than this.
The softest of kisses slowly morphed into a quiet desperation for one another. Years of longing and suffering created this insatiable need for one another. Riley dug her fingernails into his back as she opened her mouth against his. She wanted to be closer to him. She had to be closer to him. She wanted the taste of him to be burned into her soul.
Lucas moaned into her mouth as she pulled him closer. He knew they were both drunk, and that this wasn’t the best way to start whatever it was that they were becoming, but at that moment, he didn’t care. He would never be so bold with her after a fight while they were sober. He would never have the guts to put himself out there mere hours after being rejected by her. He thought he’d spend the night trying to forget about the brunette in his arms, but ever since she stepped into the living room, he knew it would be impossible. When he saw her flirt with Asher, his heart ached. When he saw her press her body up against him on the dance floor, he knew that his will had finally collapsed. He desperately wanted to ignore them, but every instinct he possessed demanded that he show her how perfect they were for one another. She had to see that. There was no way that she didn’t know that now—drunk or not. They were made for one another.
His hands slid across her lower back as he nudged her forward so that she was completely flush against him. Riley sighed into his mouth when she felt his entire body pressed against hers. She needed more. She needed him to touch her, to explore her entire body if he wanted to. She knew they were in a public place, but they had found a small sanctuary in a darkened corner. They were practically invisible to everyone else around them. She wasn’t sure how far they would take it, but at that moment, she wanted it all.
His hands ran across the length of her back three times—each time he ventured a little further south. He wasn’t even thinking about what he was doing. All he was aware of was that his dream girl, the only one he wanted, but could never have, was slowly causing the destruction of ‘Lucas the Good’. Everyone around him would claim that he hadn’t been ‘Lucas the Good’ since middle school, but he knew better. He knew the truth, and right now the truth was that no one had ever extracted every single emotion from him at once—both good and bad. They had a lot to discuss, and lot to work through, but first, they needed this moment. He needed to feel her—to know she was real, to know that this wasn’t some dream. When he lowered his hands down her back a fourth time, Lucas finally forced himself to detach his lips from hers.
Pure instinct had taken over both of them. He closed his eyes as he rested his forehead against hers once more. His brain was spinning; his heart was swelling. Both of them were breathless, both charged on something they had never ever experienced before. “You want this,” he panted as his right hand slowly ran down the length of her arm. He interlaced his fingers with hers before he continued. “I know you want this, Riley, but I need to hear it. Tell me.”
“I do,” she breathed as she closed her eyes. She was going to hell and she was going to be completely destroyed the entire way down, but this felt too good. Her entire body hummed as her heart raced. Truthfully, she had never wanted anything more. “I want you, Lucas.”
“Let’s get out of here,” he said softly as he pulled back from her. He lifted her hand to his lips before he placed a kiss to her knuckles. “Go back to the hotel room…talk…”
“I can’t,” she groaned as she felt some of her common sense coming back to her. “It’s my birthday party and everyone is here.” She looked away from him long enough to glance inside. She couldn’t see their table, so she wasn’t sure where their friends were, if they were waiting for her, or even how long she had been gone. As she turned her head back to him, she knew that the hypnotic spell she was just under had faded. “And I don’t think we should talk about this right now.”
He slowly detached his hand from hers as he took two steps back from her. His smile slowly faded into a frown as he processed the meaning behind her words. She still didn’t want to talk to him about this? “Why not?”
“We’re drunk,” she answered as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. “We can’t talk about this while we’re both hammered.” She waited a beat as she crossed her arms over her chest. His earlier comments at the hotel, not to mention the image of the blonde woman at the bar, rang through her mind. “I’m not some random girl at the bar. I’m not going to listen to a bunch of stupid promises to only have you leave my bed in the morning and never call me back.”
Lucas’s eyes narrowed. “You still think that this is a random hookup, don’t you?” How? After every that happened, how could she possibly think that? Did she not feel the same thing he did?
“I don’t know,” she answered as she shrugged her shoulders. “I know…I know what I see…what I’ve heard.” She wasn’t prepared for this conversation. She could barely think right now, let alone go another round of arguing with him. Couldn’t they just go back inside, enjoy the night, and talk about it tomorrow when they were both sober?
Her words stung. He knew he should walk away before they got into another argument, but he wasn’t exactly thinking logically as the scotch swirled within him. He was only thinking emotionally and irrationally, with was a lethal combination when mixed with alcohol. “What about you, Riley? You like to put all of this on me, but as I seem to recall, you’ve never made it past a handful of dates with a guy.”
Riley bit her bottom lip. “You don’t know what you’re talking about.” He didn’t know anything. He didn’t know that she didn’t make it past the first few dates with anyone because she realized that she couldn’t replace the man who stood in front of her. He didn’t know that she had been searching for someone to make her forget how she felt when she was around him, but that so far, she had yet to find anyone who even came close.
“Just like you have no idea what you’re talking about in regards to my relationships.” She didn’t know that he was only trying to survive the tag she had placed on their relationship. She didn’t know why he couldn’t make it work with anyone past the two-month mark. She had no clue that when it came down to really committing to someone, that he couldn’t because of her—because of how he felt about her.
His jealousy began to bubble back up along with his anger. Was she trying to push him away because she had already found someone? “What’s going on with you and that Steve guy?”
Her eyes widened. “That’s none of your business.” How was all of this getting turned around on her? She wasn’t the one cozying up to some blonde at the bar. She was the one who was trying to talk this through logically. Clearly, they didn’t need to be having this discussion right now. They were both too drunk and too emotional. The last thing she wanted was to completely wreck whatever shred of friendship that remained between them.
Lucas didn’t pick up on the hint that she didn’t want to talk about this right now. All he heard was that she wanted to keep whoever this Steve guy was a secret. Well, fine. She wasn’t obligated to tell him anything about that, but he felt that he did deserve to know about what was going on with her other suitor. “And what about Asher? He’s one of my best friends, but I had to watch you dance all over him for an hour, Riley. It killed me!”
She could practically see red as her hands began to shake in an anger she had been able to repress for seven years. Had he no idea what he actually just said? Did he really have no clue what hell she had been dragged through over the last several years? “Oh,” her voice rose. “That killed you, Lucas? THAT killed you? How do you think it felt for me when I had to watch you and Maya date in middle school? She’s my best friend, but you had no problem dating her anyway, did you?”
“Because you told me to,” he bellowed. How could she possibly throw this back at him? She told him that he was like a brother to her and that he should date Maya. She was the one who pushed him toward her in the first place. He lowered his voice as an unresolved pain splintered through his words. “You told me to date Maya. You told me that there was something going on between her and me. You told me that I was your brother, Riley. You told me that there was nothing going on between you and me and that I should be with her.”
“And you listened!” Tears swam in Riley’s eyes as she felt that brick wall around her heart finally tumble down. For years she had wanted to have this conversation with him, but always chickened out. Now, it was the absolute worst time for any of this to happen, yet here they were—rehashing their past in the middle of a Las Vegas club. “Some part of you knew that there was something more between you two or else you wouldn’t have done it!”
Lucas started to shake his head when he suddenly stopped. He was intoxicated, so his brain felt fuzzy, but suddenly, it felt like everything around him became crystal clear. When he looked back up at her, he noticed the unshed tears that swam in her eyes. Everything suddenly made perfect sense. “You lied to me.” It wasn’t a question; it wasn’t even an accusation. It was simply a statement that she didn’t have to confirm or deny because he already knew the truth. She lied to him.
Riley didn’t answer as she pursed her lips together and her eyes fell to the ground. Was this actually happening right now? She had waited so long for him to figure it out. Part of her had hoped he never would, but an even bigger part of her always knew that one day, he would discover the truth: that she never, not even for a second, saw him as a brother.
“You told me that you saw me as a brother, but that wasn’t true, was it?” He didn’t wait for her to respond. “You saw…something…between Maya and me and…and you stepped back.” A bitter chuckle exploded from him as he connected the final piece of the puzzle. “It all makes sense now!” He shook his head in disbelief as he stared at her. All this time. All these years. “You have no idea how often I replayed every conversation we’ve ever had. How I tried to figure out what I did, where I went wrong to make you see me in a different light. You have no idea how long I’ve waited for an answer.”
“Yeah, you waited such a long time,” she finally snapped back at him as her own resentment poured from her. “The moment I told you that, you turned around and went out with my best friend!” She shook her head as she forced herself to not give into the urge to cry. She wasn’t going to cry tonight—not about this and not about him. “And ever since then, you’ve been running around with any girl who gives you the least bit of attention, so excuse me for being hesitant about anything you’re telling me right now.”
“Meanwhile, you’re out there shaking your ass against one of my best friends,” he seethed. He wasn’t sure what he felt at the moment: he was plagued by a deep seeded anger that he had never felt before, the jealously that filled his veins had his mind in a vice grip, but at the center of it all was the woman he loved more now than ever before. “You know exactly what you’re doing…and you know what? It’s working. I’m losing my damn mind right now because of it. Watching you act like that with someone else is killing me, Riley.”
Maybe if she were sober, she would feel more sympathetic about the fact that a bomb had just been placed in his lap, but she wasn’t sober. She didn’t want to talk about this right now, but he had pushed her. And now, he had pushed her too far. He had to know that what he was experiencing right now was something she had to experience over and over again for years. “For one hour, you got to see me dance with someone else. For seven years, I had to watch you parade girl after girl in front of me, so excuse me for not apologizing to you for living my life.” When he opened his mouth to respond, she cut him off. “And for your information, I like Asher. He’s a really nice guy and we’ve been friends for a while now. Whatever is going on between him and me is between him and me. It has nothing to do with you.”
“But it does,” Lucas insisted as he took a step closer to her. “It has everything to do with me because I know that you want to be with me.” His eyes slowly raked over her body. He was still completely furious over the fact that she did what she did when they were in 8th grade, but all he wanted at that moment was to take her in his arms, go back to their hotel, and spend the rest of his life making up for the fact that he didn’t see this sooner. “Two minutes ago, you were ready to give into this.” When she took a step back from him, he lifted his eyes back to hers. “Now, you’re just going to run away…go back inside and what? Hook up with Asher tonight?”
Her knees went weak when he inched closer to her, but as a blend of anger, love, lust, and jealousy swirled within her, she knew that she needed a break from this entire situation. “I’m not you,” she grounded out as an image of Lauren and that blonde woman came to her mind. “I don’t run around sleeping with anyone who’s ready, willing, and able.”
“How can you possibly believe that all I want from you is a one night stand?” His anger quickly dissolved into a despondency that immediately shut down any sense of fight he had left in him. If she wanted to think that, after everything that happened the last two days, then what else could he do?
“Well, you brought me out here, and after what, two sentences of conversation, you start kissing me. What am I supposed to think right now?”
He couldn’t take it anymore. He needed another drink and he needed to get some space from her while he tried to figure everything out. “You’re wrong, Riley,” he muttered as he breezed past her.
Riley bit the inside of her cheek in order to keep herself from crying. She looked up as the Bellagio fountains sprang to life in front of her. She wrapped her arms around herself as she watched the show for a moment. It would have been an incredible memory to make with the right person, but as she looked around her, she realized that this was one memory she alone would have.
