Imagine Thorin loosing an eye in battle
Thorin: *wanders back into the throne room where you are reading on his throne after battle with a gaping bloody hole where his eye used to be* honey I'm home.
You: welcome back *puts your book marker in and looks up at him* oh my fucking god, what did you do to yourself.
Thorin: how do you know it wasn't an orc?
You: you bashed yourself in the face with your shield didn't you?
Thorin: ... yes
You: come on let's go get it treated *grabs him by the hand and leads him to the infirmary*
*a month later*
Thorin: *his wound is stable, but he wears an eye patch now*
You: *glues a googly eye on his eye patch at every opportunity*
Thorin: *often doesn't notice the googly eye, and makes every one around him laugh when he turns around dramatically*
*three years later*
Thorin: *does something Bard told him not to do and breaks some shit*
Bard: *is pissed off and chasing Thorin around his home* I'll give you something to pray about you god damn dwarven Cyclops son of a bitch!
Thorin: *sprinting as fast as he can, his googly eye eye patch bouncing with his every step*
You and Bard's kids: *laughing your asses off*
