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[ioptamarkg]

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[justsayun]

Back off the Extreme.

I don’t need bells and whistles with everything I’m involved with.  Hey, I’m no Bill Gates.   You'll find no Wall Safe in my home, but I told the kids we have four walls.  I don't’ have GPS in my car.  I use the stairs in my home and have no plans to install an elevator. (I’d love to have one with a special Pandora system in it.)  I only have a two story home so it would be tough to enjoy an entire Wilson Phillips hit on a trip upstairs.  All I see on TV  these days is everything EXTREME.  Let me toss some out; Fructis Extreme Control Hairspray, (I guess you use it if you’re working outside during a hurricane or preparing to ride a rollercoaster.) Nip & Fab Viper Venom Extreme...It’s a facial night cream.  Be careful kissing your partner nighty-night after she lathers that on. (Does it come with an Anti-Venom?)  For bodybuilders, a supplement called Storm Extreme seems it’s extremely effective at turning flab into muscle.  I always thought if I were to become one of those American Gladiators from TV I’d want to go by the name Extreme Storm.  I’m fine with calling a product "New and Improved" or even "Better Than Ever".  But I just cringe when I hear the word extreme used to try and dress up some item a company wants to hock.  While at the grocery store yesterday I noticed Right Guard has jumped on the bandwagon with Right Guard Extreme “odor combat”.  If you smell that bad, you must have other issues affecting your aroma. I would be leary being seen with some extreme products.  If a product exists called "Depends Extreme", I'd get it late at night in the self service checkout.  The same goes for "Gas-X Extreme".   I’m not one to be a joiner of every fad that comes along, but with Valentines Day in sight, I tried to give it a shot.  I told my wife I was planning on some extreme romance for Valentines Day.  She gave me a puzzled look and asked could I give her an idea of what extreme romance is?(I heard her mumble how it better not involved singing 100 bottles of beer on the wall.)  I explained Cupid, like Santa, has reindeer that pull around a sleigh of love products.(Not those type of products.  Shame on you.)  Yet he only has three reindeer pulling his sleigh since he's lighter then Santa.  I'll be kicking off our extreme V-Day based on the names of Cupids reindeer.  Red, Lacey, and Frilly.  Yes, and it's just gonna get better.  I'm already working on an Extreme Valentines Day Poem.  Here's the rough draft; "Roses are Red -- Violets are Blue -- I Pity the Fool -- That doesn't like You!" Remember that's just an EXTREME rough draft.