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*Cale, explaining some modern earth terms to Alberu*

Cale: And when you want two people to be together, you ship them.

Alberu: Ship them where?

#tcf incorrect quotes #tcf #lcf #trash of the counts family #lout of the counts family #tcf cale #tcf alberu #alberu crossman #cale henituse #albcale #alcale #lol alberu #he's a bit confused but he's got the spirit #cale is shaking his head #he's already tired #incorrect quotes

*Cale and Alberu fighting*

Alberu: Even the heavens have given up on saving your idiotic ass!

Cale: I'm not the one whose bloodline is cursed left and right!

Alberu: And yet you'll be the one to fall head first into hell!

Cale: I won't be lonely then because you'd follow me soon enough!

Alberu: Well, hell would be pretty empty because you'd scare away all demons!

Cale: Or they'd die because the literal fucking sun descended down into the underworld and vaporized everything!

Alberu: You alone equal to all demons!

Cale: And you're the most qualified to rule them!

#tcf #lcf #cale henituse #alberu crossman #tcf cale #tcf alberu #alver crossman #albcale #they're arguing #i think i went a bit overboard...?

Cale: How petty can you get?

Alberu: I once applied poison ivy paste on all the gold ornaments in the palace to show one of my brothers than he was indeed allergic to gold.

#incorrect quotes #lcf #tcf incorrect quotes #tcf alberu #tcf cale #tcf #alberu crossman #cale henituse #albcale #alcale #alberu was a menace #as a child #rn he is the shining sun of roan #and capable of great things

Cale, talking about how Deruth coddled him back at the Henituse territory: -and then father said he loves me-

Alberu, incredibly sleep deprived from all the paperwork: Pfft-

Cale: .....

Alberu: Oh shit, that wasn't a joke?

Cale: .....

Alberu: Sorry, I forgot we were talking about your father.

Cale: .....

Cale: *gets upto leave*

Alberu: Hey, I told you I'm sorry-

Cale: Hyung, let me borrow your gun for a second.

#lcf #tcf #trash of the counts family #lout of the counts family #cale henituse #alberu crossman #albcale #cale wasn't absolutely going to murder somebody #murdering the royal family us treason #cale's above the rules #but he doesn't want to deal with the aftermath of breaking them #so he slightly threatens zed #tying up zed into a chair #pointing the gun to his head #you better tell him you love him you dipshit #and that he's doing well #and your proud of him #beacrox is standing behind cale and sharpening his knives #raon is angrily munching on to his cookies

Alberu: What did you do with the body?

Cale: What didn't I do with the body?

Alberu: ...

Cale: Wait, that sounded way off and disgusting. What I meant was, I disposed the corpse respectfully.

Cale: I burnt that fucker.

#incorrect quotes #lcf #tcf cale #tcf alberu #albcale #tcf #tcf incorrect quotes #alberu crossman #cale henituse #alcale

Alberu, randomly: Cale, what are we?

Cale: a human and a quarter dark elf?

Alberu: No, what are we to each other?

Cale: You're the Crown Prince and I'm your loyal subject?

Alberu, frustrated: No, I mean what is our relationship?

Cale: Sworn brothers?

Alberu: ....

Alberu: Never mind

#lcf #tcf #incorrect quotes #cale henituse #trash of the counts family #lout of the counts family #tcf incorrect quotes #tcf cale #tcf alberu #alberu crossman #albcale #alcale #cale is denser than periodite #alberu just gave up at tgis point #poor alberu #idiots

Alberu, on hearing Cale say that his dream is to be a slacker while he was lying on the bed in the Mogru Palace after fainting for days: There is no curse in Elvish, Entish, or the tongues of men for this foolishness.

#lcf #tcf #trash of the counts family #lout of the counts family #tcf cale #tcf cale henituse #tcf alberu #tcf alver #tcf alberu crossman #alberu crossman #cale henituse #albcale #cale is an idiot #alberu is so done #cale is never getting his slacker life #not with that attitude #literally everyone knows #incorrect quotes #tcf incorrect quotes

Alberu: If I say I love you, would you say it back?

Cale: Yes

Alberu: I love you.

Cale: It back

Alberu: .....

#lcf #incorrect quotes #tcf #trash of the counts family #lout of the counts family #tcf alberu crossman #tcf cale henituse #alberu crossman #cale henituse #albcale #poor alberu #cale be doing everything from saving the world to being a literal god #but cannot say an i love you back

#albcale

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