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We as a fandom have decided that yes, Jake really really sucks at basketball. The questions are 1) Is Jake still the best at basketball out of his fellow Animorphs and 2) If not, is Jake the worst at basketball out of a team that includes a bird and an alien who might attempt to eat the basketball depending on if he's in human morph at the time?

Oooh, I'd rank the Animorphs' basketball skills as:

Rachel (tall, athletic)

Cassie (good aim, as #29 demonstrates)

Jake (tall, actually knows the rules of the game)

Marco (slightly not tall, overthinks things)

Ax (probably lacks the arm strength to throw an object that far)

Tobias (bird)

#animorphs #animorphs crack #basketball #jake berenson

Visser Three: "HA HA! I have discovered the books written by the so-called Animorphs! I now know all their secrets! They think they can protect their identities by not telling their last names or where they live, BUT LOOK! Marco says he is the son of Visser One's host! THE FOOL! This means his last name is…" Visser Three: "Is…" Visser Three: "…" Visser Three: *hates Visser One so much he never bothered to learn her host's name* Visser Three: *can't reveal he doesn't know to his subordinates* Visser Three: "These books are obviously lies written by the real Andalite bandits. But I'm too smart to fall for them."

#animorphs #animorphs meta #animorphs crack #crack

alternate version

#I named it #animorphs meme #animorphs memes #animorphs crack #animorph #animorphs #yeerk #yeerks #human controllers #the sharing

#Shitpost #Humor #Animorphs #tobias fangor #Animorphs crack #K A Applegate #Greentext #not my image #Not my meme #Stolen from animorphs yerkposting on fb

Who would be the funniest character in animorphs to be lactose intolerant? I

Tobias. Because he would never figure it out. He'd just eat dairy, and then suffer, and then figure that suffering is his due because that's how the universe tends to treat him. And then, to make him feel better, Ax would suggest they go get ice cream.

#animorphs #animorphs crack #lactose intolerance #emohawk #tobias fangor

i have no idea if you were the account that i said this to so if you’ve read it before i apologize.

but picture this: one day ax sends the gang telepathic images of cinnabons all day while they’re at school and they’re all sick of it, until marco concentrates really hard and sends ax an image of a middle finger and accidentally unlocks thought speak as a human

Headcanon accepted!

#animorphs #never make discoveries out of fear. only out of spite.#thought-speak #animorphs crack #spring cleaning

here's a funny AU. Animorphs TV show. all the characters are actors in the new Animorphs TV show revival, playing it as it should be. you think this one has legs to stand on, or will it only last 1 season?

So it's the Animorphs all playing themselves in a TV show? Oh lord.

Jake: would not know how to deliver lines with the correct level of sincerity, which would for some reason come out as constant California upspeak.

Cassie: would find the whole thing unbearably silly, especially the animal "facts" that she's asked to convey.

Rachel: incredibly variable, depending on the number of the take. In the first version of any given shot she's pretty good. In the 8th, she tends to sound like she's grinding the words between her teeth.

Ax: extremely committed to acting like human acting like an andalite acting like a human acting like an andalite. Committed ≠ talented.

Tobias: meant to have a flat affect. Nailing it.

Marco: carrying this team so hard, to the point where by Episode 10 it's 80% footage of him and 20% the other five combined.

Jake as Jake: [bursting into barn] Hey guys? I have terrible news? The yeerks killed the first lady? And now they're infesting the president?

Tobias as Tobias: Oh. No. Sounds terrible. Whatever shall. We do.

Cassie as Cassie: We should [suppressing giggles] we should morph [more giggles] morph cockroach because cockroaches are [rest is lost to giggling].

Rachel as Rachel: Gee willikers, what a splendiferous idea, gosh and whizz, how swell, my pal!*

Ax as Ax: [looking straight at camera, eyes extremely wide] That is an extremely normal suggestion, Cassie. And as a fellow normal person, I feel that it is correct. Correct being an extremely boring thing to say, with no associated mouth-sounds containing any delightful consonants.

Marco: [slinging an arm around Ax's shoulders] Well, I can tell we're all a little stressed by this news, but thankfully we've got you here to come through with ideas [flourishes at Cassie]. Glad you spotted this, Big Jake — lead us to the aliens!

*First-take Rachel, decent actor that she is, tends to drop a swear word or five into her delivery. Sixth-take Rachel, sick of being corrected and passive-aggressive about it, tends to sound like a manic cartoon character.

#animorphs #anitv #jake berenson #tobias fangor #cassie animorphs #rachel berenson #aximili esgarrouth isthill #marco animorphs #animorphs crack #acting

Crack ship: post-war Marco and Jeremy Jason McCole cast on a show together. FurSparks fly.

Hell yes. They start out in an argument about who has the better hair, it escalates into a dance-off, and then next thing they know they're making out.

Heated Rivalry-style fake animosity ensues, with Jeremy Jason McCole loudly insisting he hates all things Animorph any time he's asked and Marco refusing to call JJM anything but "that voluntary-controller twerp" in public. All the while JJM's leaving the air vent of his trailer open just wide enough for a wolf spider to get in, any time they're in the same part of town at the same time.

Hollywood's two tiniest heartthrobs each believe the contest was settled in his favor, and he does have better hair than his boyfriend.

#animorphs #marco animorphs #jeremy jason mccole #animorphs crack #marco *does* canonically spend a lot of time talking about jjm's lips. so i can see it.