below is my general reaction/review of part one of because even then, I knew by @catboyieejeno . contains SPOILERS
not to mention I did betaread/edit this fic, so it may not have all of my first reactions(and I reread this on call with carina LOL)
"When he was 7 he fell in love."
sorry this is just the most endearing and relatable thing I've ever read. I had my first crush at five years old, pretty much the second I entered elementary school, and the concept of loving someone in a way that differed from how I felt about my parents was so all encompassing and overwhelming, that when my best friend spilled the beans to him, I had never felt more rage towards a person than I had towards her in my entire(albeit, short-lived) life. crazy how things become magnified before you reach adulthood lmaoooooo
"Why can't he stop looking at you?"
I can't get over how insanely human this feels. It's such a humbling feeling, having your apprehensions about something and nevertheless veing drawn to it all the same. Especially when that "thing" is a person. The juxtaposition between "I swore I'd never" and "why do I keep running into this" stirs some kind of critical thinking in all of us that I CANNOT get enough of ughhhhhh
"Seokmin found himself looking forward to seeing you every single night from then on"
not much to say here my heart just hurt a little bit remembering what that felt like. it feels so innocent, and you try to find other reasons for your selfish actions, but sooner or later you admit to yourself the real reason why you do what you do and it's so. SOOOOOOOOOOOOO
that part where seokmin dreams about how you'll thank him for returning your phone and also readying himself to stand "he didn't forget, he just wanted to sound nonchalant"
painfully human. I have to applaud you for how relatable all of these emotions are. and it makes me kind of happy how obvious it is that in this story, I'm seokmin instead of y/n YIKES
"And stop moping. You're making the flowers sad. They feel these kinds of things"
LITERALLY JUST READ A MINGHAO FLOWERSHOP AU WHERE A SIMILAR THEME WAS PRESENTED UGH I LOVEEEEEE
"Are you still sulking over the pretty girl from the bus?"
ngl I would die of embarrassment here lmao there is no way he just got outed like that lmao
"Simply put: you were not her."
ahhhh subtle but appreciated emotional maturity. that's hot
"he starts counting down the hours until he can see you again."
TOOOOOO REAL I WANNA BE IN LOVE AGAIN AHHHHH
"I wanted to."
THIS. why is it casual honesty that feels the most attractive to me? my ex's close friend had told me that honesty is intimacy and I think she might be right. the vulnerability has to be somewhat attractive to me but MANNNNNN it's always gonna get to me isn't it?
"This is me"
never ever EVER getting over this double entendre. "this is me" meaning that that is your bus stop, but also that that song was just the embodiment of you. and seokmin not only accepting but LIKING that part of you is more than wholesome IT MAKES ME WANT TO RIP MY HAIR OUT
"You don't have to, even if you brought it all the way out here. It's up to you."
as someone who plays guitar, this is so reassuring. a lot of time the pressure/nerves of playing in front of someone gets to you and it feels too daunting of a task, so the reminder that it's up to us is genuinely so kind
"Have you always been this lovely, or am I just starting to see it now?"
stood up from my bed and clapped(in my head)
"A little embarrassed but somehow happy to be caught."
"happy to be caught" THE WAY I COULD WRITE A WHOLE E S S A Y ON THIS
"What's this doing all the way out here?"
no bc an american penny all the way in seoul is kind of magical. like it was meant for them. ughghgshghsjdhsdgjs
"your hands anchoring each other"
the way this is phrased is so beautiful but I honestly just needed a minute to rant about the entire karaoke/kiss scene. as someone who has lived through that kind of love-drunkenness, it is insanely well written and accurate. the unexplainable gravity between the two of you, the not wanting to be far from each other, the inability to find reasons to leave each other, the reluctance to look away, everything. that kind of stumbling down the street with stars in your eyes love is something that I hope everyone who reads this fic experiences one day. it almost hurt a little bit to relive that, knowing that my heart is similar to dk's in the sense that it's apprehensive towards feeling it again, KNOWING where it leads if everything goes wrong. ITS SO COMPLEX but the scene is so sweet I just wanna lie down and cry
I'll post a separate one for part two <3
