Summary: You are at the altar, holding hands. Everybody is waiting for you to speak, but is the man you are marrying your true love? Is Mr. Perfect the same guy as Mr. Right?
Words: 1.2k
Warnings: angst, angst, and more angst.
Here it is, enjoy:
“Are you ready, dear?” Mum knocked on the door.
“Almost. almost.” I took a sip of champagne.
“I’m coming in.” My lovely mother barged in, as if I was drowning or something.
I rolled my eyes and took another big gulp. She came closer to me and took the glass off my hand.
“The bride shouldn’t be drunk before the ceremony.” She stroked my cheek.
“What is it dear? Don’t say nothing. I’m your mother. I know something is bothering you.” She pulled me and sat next to me on the sofa.
“Just nervous I guess.” I took the handheld mirror to examine my face.
“You look beautiful.” She smiled.
“Thanks, mum.” I gave back a half smile.
“Talk to me.” Mum never misses when I’m worried.
“Only the stress from this whole thing.” I waved my hands in the air.
“There’s more, pretty lady.” She took my hand in hers.
“You aren’t happy. I’m you mum, I see everything, even when you don’t. Most of the time.” She nervously laughed.
“Mum…” I took a deep breath “Everything is happening so fast.” I exhaled.
She nodded.
“It’s him, isn’t it?” she lifted my chin with her finger and looked straight into my eyes.
I swallowed and half nodded, unable to confess. How stupid I was.
“Tell you this. You can’t think too much about how many hearts you may break today. Think about yourself. What does your heart tell you?” her soft voice gave me a light at the end of the tunnel.
“I… I…” I shook my head “Dad won’t ever forgive me. All of our family will be ruined if I ran way now. I care about you and dad and grandma and grandpa. And all of my cousins and aunts and…”
“Sh.sh. We’ll be okay.” She smiled warmly.
“No you won’t!” I rapidly stood up.
“If they all love you, they’d understand.” She stood next to me.
“But…” tears started to bubble up my eyes.
“There’s still time.” Mum squeezed my hand.
“You decide your faith, my dear. It’s now, or you’ll regret it much more later.” She kissed my head.
I couldn’t be selfish right now, no matter what mum was telling me. This was the only way to save my brother from his doom. Marrying Brad was my contract. My brother’s freedom, in exchange for mine. He wasn’t bad. He was adequate, caring for my family, keeping my brother safe from prison. Damn his status. Brad’s power in higher court was one of the few things that kept me around him for so long. Fuck. I did fall for him somehow, right? We had these moments… he is funny and witty and … way too perfect for me.
And here I was, getting ready to marry mr. perfect, and all I could think about is Ben and his inconsistent ways of showing and disappearing from my life with the worst timing ever. Just when things are going good with Brad, Ben popped up and ruined it again, and again. I’m such a fool for letting myself get weak for him. Especially after he cheated on me, multiple times, damnit!
“Lovely to-be-my-bride you in here?” Brad knocked on the door.
“Bad luck to see the bride before the wedding.” I wiped my tears off quickly.
“You okay in there? Is there anything you need?”
“No. I’m good. Last fitting. Be right up.” I shouted back.
“See you at the altar.”
“Yeah…” I quietly murmured.
From then on, before I could realise, I was standing at the alter with Brad holding my hands, everybody waiting for me to say it.
I can fucking do it. I told myself. It’s just two words, right? I swallowed hard and swiped a strand of hair off my face. I took a look around. There were sitting my dad and mum, my brother, all aunts and their husbands and kids. Everybody looked so peaceful and genuinely happy.
“I can’t.” I look straight into Brad’s eyes.
Everybody laughs, including him.
“I just can’t.” I shake my head and pull my hands off his.
“Somebody got a bit too much champagne, huh?” He jokes and everybody laughs.
“I can’t marry you.” I shake my head and then I see him. Standing by the exit door, hidden in the corner, was Ben. In his leather jacket and dark sunglasses.
“Ben!” I silently cry out.
“Oh God.” He whimpers.
We both began running towards each other. He takes my hand. The only thing I ever needed to know what’s right for me. I nod at him and we make our way outside. And we run. We run like crazy little kids.
“Follow me.” He breathlessly pulls me his direction. In this uncertain time, this is the only thing I feel right.
We made it into the woods, until we reached a cliff. A breath-taking view of the lake.
“I only love you!” Ben cries.
“Ben.” I try to stop him but he cuts me off.
“Wait. Let me talk first.” His thick accent accelerates my heartbeat.
“I screwed up. Multiple times. And I thought it was best for you to stay away. To keep you safe from my world. Watching you make the biggest mistake in your life, feels like a stake through my chest. I’m sorry I made you hate me. Because I’d rather you hate me than love me. I was stupid. I didn’t know how to love or what was. Today I saw it, I felt it, now I know what love is. And I fucking love you!” Ben’s words sound like a balm healing my broken pieces together.
“I love you too!” I shout. Before I looked around it had started to pour cold rain and we were both very wet and cold.
“Please. Be mine. Stay with me. I’ve learned the hard, the worst way how important you are to me. I cannot loose you again, not forever.” Ben takes my hands in his own.
“I’m not going anywhere. I’ll be right here with you. You are my Mr. Perfect. All your flaws and mistakes and way of life. I can take it all, as long as I do it with you.” Without any hesitation I jump on my toes and press my lips hard against his.
The pouring rain and cold wind are nothing compared to the fire burning in me right now.
“I want to burn!” I clench my jaw. “I don’t care how long I’ll live. I’d burn and die right here right now, with YOU!”
“Then we shall set fire!”
________
A/n: Please if you enjoyed, give me a like, leave me a comment, share, whatever you feel like. Every sign somebody likes my writing makes my day :)
Warnings: Swearing, alcohol, ANGST - turns to fluff.
Note: This is my contribution to @rogerina-deacon writing challenge!
Lyrics to the song are written in cursive. Lines marked with * __ * is a text-message.
A big thank you to @imsusx and @brianandthemays for BETA reading this. I really truly had a hard time making this one work out and you really helped me out. Thank you so much! I couldn't have done this without you guys. ❤️
__________________
Today is gonna be the day
That they're gonna throw it back to you
By now you should've somehow
Realized what you gotta do
I don't believe that anybody
Feels the way I do, about you now
"It's been going on for way too long already. It's too late to do or say anything now, and you know it! Besides... I think he might be in love with someone else." The words barely left your lips before you started to feel the heat rise to your face as you argued with your best friend. She was the only person in the whole world who knew about your crush on Gwilym and, as things were going, she would be the only person in the world to ever know. You had met Gwilym through your old classmate about a year and a half or so ago. He had invited you and Gwilym to the same party a while back. You hit it off instantly and became really good friends. But never more than that. Just friends.
Gwilym had brought you along for a lot of things that had to do with his work, though. Premiers, shoots, red carpets even a few interviews where you weren't on camera at all you were just there as moral support and because you really wanted to be there with him. Today was no different. He had invited you to a big release party for his newest movie, at least a thousand guests would be there, he had said. You had agreed in a heartbeat, taking up any opportunity to be with him.
"But you know today is going to be the best chance you have to tell him!" your friend whined, clearly as frustrated as you were.
"I don't have to tell him anything. It's just a stupid crush and-"
"A STUPID CRUSH?!" she yelled, cutting you off.
"You've been completely smitten with him for at least a year! That's not a stupid crush!"
You sighed, feeling the tears well up in your eyes. The feeling of hopelessness flooded through your veins. You knew she was right. At the bottom of your heart, you just knew. Every night for the past year you had fallen asleep pretending to be laying next to Gwilym, his arms wrapped around you and having his soft snores lull you to sleep. You had even started kissing your pillow, pretending to be kissing him instead.
"Hello? Earth is calling! You can't just back out of this by not answering me!" Your friend continued after a few moments.
"I'm... I know. I'm sorry. I just don't know what to do." you whined, walking backward until your back hit the wall behind you, allowing you to slide down until you were situated on the floor. You pulled up your knees and wrapped your arms around your legs, trying to become as small as possible.
"Then listen to me" she sighed, clearly getting fed up with the constant struggle with you being too shy to admit your feelings and her having to deal with all your emotional breakdowns. "You go to that fucking party, you turn it the fuck out and you get your sorry little ass together and tell Gwilym that you're in love with him and then you deal with whatever outcome there is!" she listed, pointing at you after every step in her plan.
"Yeah yeah yeah" you replied, resting your forehead on your arms.
"No! Don't 'yeah-yeah-yeah' me! Listen to my advice and do as I tell you. I love you - but man am I getting sick and tired of listening to your complaints about being single and how much to fancy this guy! Go out and do something about it!" your friend was still fuming.
"I know, sorry," you said and lifted your head, obtaining eye contact with your friend.
"Thank you for being there for me, though. Even though you are being a bit harsh right now” you continued while not-so-elegantly getting up from the floor again. “Are you hungry?"
"Yeah... I'm a little hungry. Hangry even, maybe" she laughed and shook her head.
"Thought so - let's go out. I'll treat us to some nachos, yeah?"
She agreed and the two of you quickly popped out for lunch before returning to your flat. Your friend had offered to help you get ready before Gwilym would come and pick you up so you could go to the party together. Now that you knew that this was going to be the night that you finally told him about your feelings, you wanted to look your best. Mainly because looking your best coincidentally also made you feel your best.
The sound of your doorbell went off and you knew exactly what that meant. Gwilym was finally here and you couldn't wait to see him. Quickly you downed the last of your drink and made your way to the front door. You pushed up your boobs one final time and straightened the front of your dress before slowly opening the door.
"Well well well, hello there little missy - aren't you a treat for the eye!" Gwilym said as he saw you. His words made the blood rush to your cheeks and a goofy smile made its way over your lips.
"Oh Gwil, you're too sweet" you laughed as you wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him in for a hug.
He hummed in a non-verbal answer and placed a soft kiss to your cheek as he pulled away from the hug.
"Are you ready for a wild night?" he asked, offering his arm for you to hold on to, as he lead you away from your flat.
"Sure am, Sir. Sure am," you laughed and locked your door before following him to the car.
The car ride to the event went smoothly. Whenever you were alone with Gwilym it felt like it was the most natural thing in the world - like everything had fallen in to place. Yet, you still didn't dare to tell him how you actually felt. You just barely hinted at it during your conversation but he didn't seem to catch on - or if he did, he brushed it off.
You arrived at the party and Gwilym graciously lead you inside where you greeted all of his friends; friends that you had become very well acquainted with at this point, due to all the events you had been at, at this point. Within an hour or so Gwilym had left your side to go chat with someone else, while you stayed with Ben and Lucy.
"So how're things between you and Gwil?" Lucy asked, taking a slow sip of her drink.
"Things?" you asked, slightly confused, quickly scanning the room to see if Gwilym was anywhere close.
"Yeah? Aren't you guys like... A thing? I mean you've been to every single get together for the past 6 months?" she asked obviously more confused than you were.
"No, God no - we're absolutely just friends," you stammered, feeling a slight panic race through your body.
"Just friends, yeah?" Ben chimed in.
"Yeah, yeah. There's never been- uh... Never been anything," you said and your eyes darted to the floor, desperate to avoid any eye contact.
"Never? Really?" Lucy asked sounding almost flabbergasted.
"Yeah," you admitted with a defeated tone of voice.
"Do you want anything to be there?" Ben asked cautiously.
You kept your eyes glued to the floor, clearly spending way to much time thinking about your answer.
"I..." you said and sighed deeply. "I don't know. He's lovely, really - and I've thought-" you started. "No - no. Forget it. It doesn't matter" you sighed again deciding that it was better to keep your feelings a complete secret.
"It absolutely does matter! You have a crush on him, don't you?" Lucy said, sounding way more excited than you wanted her to.
"I.. Lucy I don't know how to-" You finally looked up from the ground and as your eyes searched to obtain eye contact with Lucy you accidentally looked over her shoulder.
Behind her across the room was Gwilym with some woman you had never seen before. Her hands on his bicep and cheek, his hands around her waist and their lips absolutely glued together. Your breath got caught in your throat and a million thoughts and feelings rushed through your mind before everything went black. Nothing mattered anymore.
"I'm sorry... I have to- uh- go," you whispered, feeling the tears starting to well up in your eyes.
"(Y/N) wait! What's-" Ben started before he saw Gwilym. "Oh," he gasped.
"Oh no," Lucy whispered and looked after you, only to see the very back of your head as you disappeared out of the front door.
The tears had started freely flowing down your cheeks ruining your make-up in no time. Frustration rushed through your veins and the uncontrollable urge to break things started filling your consciousness. At this point, you couldn't even be bothered to call a taxi. You need the fresh air, the break, the silence. In your fury, your hurt - and your stilettos - you just started walking, running almost, in the direction of your home. You managed to walk for an hour before the physical pain of wearing stilettos got too much and you had to call a taxi for the last few kilometers.
When you finally got home you slammed the door with a force you didn't even know you possessed. Kicked off your shoes and threw your purse on the floor. You stomped your way to your bedroom and violently got out of your clothes and right before you slammed on to the bed, a heartbreakingly primal scream left your lips, finally allowing you to collapse on to your bed. Your brain went crazy, running over every memory you have of you and Gwilym, causing you to violently sob and cry. The only thing that stopped your crying was when you finally fell asleep.
Backbeat, the word was on the street
That the fire in your heart is out
I'm sure you've heard it all before
But you never really had a doubt
I don't believe that anybody
Feels the way I do about you now
It had been 3 months since the last time you had spoken to Gwilym. In the days after the party, he had desperately trying to get a hold of you, calling you, texting you - he even showed up to your flat. Yet you gave him no answer. Ben had been your main source of finding out what was going on with Gwilym and he had truly been there for you, allowing you to empty your heart and mind right onto his shoulders. Through him, you had found out that the woman Gwilym had been kissing on the night of the party continued to pop up alongside Gwilym, and at one point, Ben finally confirmed that the two of them were a couple. The message had broken the final piece of your heart, leaving you a sobbing mess once again.
Today you were woken up by a new text from Ben simply saying 'It's over. They're over'. You read the text and felt your heart started to race. Within a few minutes, you had gained control over your breathing and partly some control over your thoughts and you decided to call Ben. Luckily he picked up his phone quickly.
"It's me," his dark voice beamed through your phone.
"It's the mess calling," you softly said with a voice dripping with self-pity.
"Hello, Miss Mess. How are you doing?" he asked sounding genuinely worried about you.
"I'm... Okay. I think. Uhm, I actually called because of your text. Are they really? I mean have they broken up?" you nervously asked, fearing what Ben might tell you.
"Absolutely. Gwilym just popped over earlier. Apparently, she cheated on him but he didn't sound as upset as you would think someone who had just been cheated on would sound. He said something about their ‘thing’ never really 'feeling right' - whatever that was supposed to mean. He didn’t even refer to her as a girlfriend or well, ex-girlfriend.."
"Uh-huh. Well, that’s great - or, you know. Not great but.. yeah," you softly laughed. Ben always had a way to make you feel better, even on your darkest days. Well, almost. "Thank you so much for telling me, Ben. I'll call you back some other time okay? Miss you - bye!" You said and hung up once he had said his goodbyes too.
A strange feeling started to soar through your body. On one hand, it felt really good to know that Gwilym was no longer with anyone and on the other hand you felt bad for enjoying someone's misery. Even though you had felt like your heart had been shattered all those months ago your crush on Gwilym never disappeared. He was still the only man on your mind. Just as your thoughts started to wander another text ticked in on your phone.
*Are you ready to talk yet? I miss you so much. Please*
The text was from Gwilym and just seeing his name on your phone again made your heart skip a beat.
*I’m so sorry. I miss you too, can I call you?*
It didn’t take long before your phone rang and after a few deep breaths you picked it up.
“Gwilym?” you asked.
“Yes, God I’ve missed you so much,” he whined.
The conversation between the two of you wasn’t very long. It just didn’t seem right to have such a serious conversation through the phone. Just hearing his voice again made your heartache. Instead, you decided it was better to meet up, face to face, which ended up with you inviting him to your flat as soon as he had time to sit down and really talk. Three days. In three days from now, he would be over.
And all the roads we have to walk are winding
And all the lights that lead us there are blinding
There are many things that I
Would like to say to you but I don't know how
The three days seemed to be longer than any other days you had ever lived through. You spent a lot of time tidying and cleaning your flat to hide the fact that you had barely been able to leave your bed out of pure self-pity for the past few months.
The nervousness of finally meeting up with Gwilym again started to spread throughout your body. For 3 whole months, you hadn't seen or talked to the man you once considered to be your best friend. But before the nerve-numbing feeling of panic managed to spread too far, you heard a very familiar voice call your name and a few subtle knocks on your door.
"Gwilym… Hi," you whispered softly as you opened the door, finally seeing him again. The look on this face made your body instantly fill with guilt and shame. The guilt of just leaving him behind and flat out ignore him for all those months, without even telling him why.
"I've missed you," he whined. He had already had quite the day and seeing you were the cherry on top of a very miserable cake.
"I'm so sorry. I'm just the wor-"
Gwilym took a single long stride forwards and scooped you into his arms, pulling you in for a rib-crushingly tight hug.
You could feel yourself melt into his touch, desperately trying to forget that the past 3 months had happened. You just wanted everything to go back to normal. After a few moments of silence, and just the two of you glued together in your doorway, you pulled out of the hug, finally inviting him inside and closing the door slowly behind him.
"Gwilym, I'm so so sorry for being such a bad friend. There are so many things I'd like to say to you, I just don't know how," you started to apologize as you turned around to face him again.
"God, I've missed the sound of your voice," he said in a laughing sigh.
"Listen, we've got a lot to talk about. Do you mind if I make myself a cuppa?" he asked quickly afterward.
"No - no, let me do it. Earl grey, no sugar, a splash of milk, yeah?" you said, making your way to your kitchen, quickly getting a pot of water ready for boiling.
"Please. That would be perfect," he said and dumped down on one of your kitchen chairs.
A few moments of silence passed through your tiny kitchen while the pot started to boil and you made two cups of tea. You slowly walked over and handed the milky one to Gwilym and sat down opposite from him.
"I.." you started but ended up sighing, not knowing how to word all the feelings you wanted to tell Gwilym about.
"No, let me," he insisted.
"I went by Ben's place earlier today and he told me about... Some things." he started and placed the cup of tea on the table.
"That party. I.. I just feel so bad. I didn't even realize you had left until three hours after. God, I felt horrible when I found out. I tried to call you but... You didn’t pick up - for three months," he said. It stung - bad. He hadn't even noticed that you had left.
"Listen, Gwil. You don't have-"
"No, please don't interrupt. I have so many things I need to say." he laughed softly, holding up his forefinger as if to shush you.
"But why now?" you said. You knew why he came by now and not earlier, but you wanted to hear it from him.
"She... I mean you know, the woman from the party, we... uh," he seemed to fumble with his words. "Erica was her name. Well, it still is, she isn't dead. Uh. We sorta.. Oh, you know already don't you?" It was obvious that he felt uncomfortable with the conversation.
"I know.. Some things. Ben really loves his gossip doesn't he?" you laughed. "You guys were a couple and now you're... not?" you softly said, taking a sip of your tea.
"We were never an official couple... We dated, sure... But it never really... Felt right, you know? We just didn't click."
"And that took you three months to figure out?"
"Yeah- well... She cheated on me. So I guess it didn't feel right for her either" Gwilym sighed and rolled his eyes.
"I'm sorry to hear," you softly said, offering a bit of sympathy, even though you didn't really have any.
"It's okay, really. I wasn't ever meant to be, was it?" he laughed.
Before you got the chance to answer him, he cleared his throat and started talking again. You took in a deep breath of air and slumped back in your chair allowing Gwilym to say what he needed to say.
"Anyway - I didn't.." he paused for a while, clearly unsure of how to word his next sentence. "Listen. I didn't know that you felt like that... you know, the- uh... the crush and all. But if I had known, of course, I would've never gone after someone else. I thought that... what we had was simply platonic. That's how I thought you wanted it. I spent so much time trying to hint at us becoming something… more. But since you never picked up on any of the hints I just thought you weren't interested." He sighed defeated stopping for a moment to take a sip of his tea.
You didn't say anything. You focused on breathing steadily and not pouring your tea into your lap.
"I'm so sorry for... everything you've been through. I just wish I had known - I wish you would've told me instead of just... Freezing me out. I get it - I really do. Couldn't have been easy seeing what you saw." You could clearly see the pain in his eyes as he thought back on that night.
"Gwilym…" you chimed in, only to be cut off by him again.
"No - listen. I just want to let you know that… I'm not mad at you. I unknowingly broke your heart - yes, Ben talks too much and let me in on everything. He was my only source to check in on you," he admitted, lowering his head in some sort of shame.
"You checked in on me?" your voice was fragile and barely louder than a whisper.
"Of course I did. You're still my main squeeze." He softly said placing his hands down on the table, open and inviting you to place yours directly in his. And so you did.
"Gwilym I'm-"
"I'm not done"
"I don't care - it's my turn now," you laughed and squeezed his hands. "Listen," you started and sighed "What I did was wrong. It was bad. And I feel so ashamed of the way I've been acting. You didn't do anything wrong, really. I just overreacted and I realized that fairly quickly but... I was way too ashamed to tell you that."
A soft laugh emitted from Gwilym's mouth as you finished your sentence.
"God this is a strange conversation to have," you sighed through a soft laugh.
"Yeah, it really is. But I think I understand what the main point of all of it is," he said and stood from his chair.
You followed his lead and rose to your feet, not exactly knowing why you did it. It only took him two long strides to move around your table and stand right in front of you. He quickly grabbed a hold of your hands and held them tight to his chest.
"I might have misinterpreted something now, so tell me if I'm all off," he started and squeezed your hands a little tighter.
"But it's always been us, hasn't it. We've just never… dared to act upon it," he continued, scanning your face for some sort of confirmation.
The tension between the two of you grew rapidly. The air almost felt thick and the sudden silence seemed deafening. You wanted him more than ever. To just jump into his arms and forget anything bad had ever happened. But you hadn’t spoken in three months. A slight twinge of fear soared through your body. A fear that he was merely using you to get back up after been cheated on. Not that he ever struck you like the type of person who would just go about and mindlessly play with other people's feelings.
"Gwilym, I don't want to be your stupid rebound." At this point, you were almost crying.
"You're not! Absolutely not!" he protested and pulled you a little closer to his body. "I know my timing is awful, but you're the reason things between Erica and I never got really serious. You're the reason it never felt right. I thought about you every single day and these few months have been hell for me. Please just believe me. You're not a rebound. You're so much more than that. I'll show you every single day for the rest of my life - if you'll allow me into your heart again"
He looked at you with the most vulnerable and pleading eyes you had ever seen from him. His warm hands still covering yours had started to shake just a little and his energy had changed. You had never had him so raw and vulnerable before and it broke your heart, but in a good way. Slowly you took a step closer to him, to the point where your feet were between his and your hips almost touched - almost a hug without arms.
"I'm still in love with you," you whispered softer than ever, scared of what would happen next.
Gwilym sighed and you felt him melt into you. His sigh made him sound relieved and he seemed to be more relaxed than before. The two of your shared a moment of the most intense silence and the deepest eye contact you had ever had with anyone before. The moment didn’t last too long before Gwilym finally let go of your hands and instead cupped your face and rested his forehead against yours.
You stood completely still barely even breathing.
“Kiss me,” you whispered, lips hovering just above his.
“Oh, I’m planning on it,” he laughed softly before he finally closed his eyes and leaned forward to close the tiny space that had been between your mouths.
His soft lips slowly moved against yours, kissing you softer than you had been kissed before. It felt like it was your very first kiss. The butterflies in your stomach started to spread and you couldn’t think about anything other than Gwilym’s mouth against yours and the feeling of his stubble against your chin.
“You’re right,” you said, just as you broke the kiss.
“Right about what?”
“It has always been us. It really has.”
“Thought so,” he laughed and slid his hands down your body, bringing them to rest on your lower back, just above your butt.
“Now this might seem rushed, but I have one final question I need to ask you today,” he said and pulled your body closer to his.
“Yeah?”
“Would you do me the utmost honour of becoming my girlfriend?” His voice was calmer than you had thought it would be by now. But his calmness gave you a boost of confidence. He felt safe around you and really wanted you in his life - wanted you, as his girlfriend, and he wasn’t scared to ask you or to admit his feelings to you.
“Yes - Oh my, yes! Gwilym, yes!” you whined, almost crying again.
You placed your hands around his neck pulling his face close to yours again before desperately crashing your lips against his. It felt like he was the only thing on the planet that you needed to survive. Finally, everything felt as if it had fallen into place.
Because maybe, you're gonna be the one that saves me
And after all, you're my Wonderwall.
Here's a random request that you didn't ask for, BUT: could you maybe write something fluffy about Gwilym? Like... you're having a bad day and being really self-conscious and just feeling really bad about your body where you're at the point of almost breaking up with Gwil because you feel like he's to good for you but he calms you down and convinces you that you're perfect for him? and like.. lots of love and kisses and all that. 🥺🥺
I love random requests that I didn´t ask for haha! Especially if it means distracting me from studying. Hope this is okay, and that you are okay. I´m always here if you want to talk:)
Alright, here are 1282 words of sappy Gwilym fluff/angst. Enjoy!
“Love? Are you okay in there?”, Gwilym´s soft voice called through the bathroom door. You had been in there for almost an hour, your shower ending a long time ago. You had forgotten to bring clothes with you and you just couldn´t bring yourself to face him almost naked. You felt bloated and really unattractive today, had been for a while. The last few weeks you had tried to hide it from your boyfriend, shying away from his touches. Having sex with the light off the few times you would let him close. However, you always stopped his wandering hands, keeping them off your stomach, thighs. Every part of your body you disliked.
“Y-yeah, I uh, I forgot my clothes”, you mumbled, trying to conceal your shaky breath.
“And? What´s the problem?”, Gwilym asked. You could hear him shifting outside the door, a sense of panic flooding your body as you realized you probably hadn´t locked the door. You could see the handle slowly moving.
“Wait, can you just get them for me? They´re on the bed”, you said, reaching for the towel and hastily wrapping it around your naked body.
“Of course, my love”
You could hear his steps disappear as you franticly tried to rub the tears from your eyes. They were red and puffy, but at least drier. You would just have to dab some concealer on before facing him. You couldn´t deal with the confrontation. Not now.
However, the sound of the door opening spoiled your plans. You stopped dead in your tracks, eyes widening as you turned to look at Gwilym. His face fell the second he saw yours, the clothes in his arms falling to the floor. He quickly crossed the room, wrapping his arms around you and pulling you into his chest. You couldn´t hold back anymore, tears streaming down your face as you uncontrollably sobbed in his embrace.
Gwilym held you close, his hands soothing your back as he swayed you back and forth slightly.
“Shh, love. It´s okay, I got you”, he whispered, his voice pained. “What´s wrong, YN?”
You didn´t reply, just buried your face further into his chest, drenching his shirt in your tears.
“Please, Y/N. I, fuck, I can´t stand to see you like this. Just tell me what it is so I can try to fix it”, Gwilym said, his voice breaking as he pulled away slightly. He took in your form, his heart hurting as he reached up to wipe some of your tears away.
“You can´t fix it”, you mumbled, turning your face away from his touch. “You should just leave me, Gwilym. Get it over with”
“What? I´m not leaving you, Y/N. What has gotten into you?”, he said, furrowing his eyebrows. He grasped your chin, forcing you to meet his deep blue eyes.
“Just look at you! You´re literally perfect and I´m just this average girl. This isn´t going to last, you´re going to find someone better. Someone prettier, someone with a better body, better everything”
Gwilym´s face fell into one of sadness as a tear escaped his eye. He looked absolutely heart broken, reflecting how you felt.
“Is that why you almost haven´t let me touch you lately?”, he asked, voice low. You let your gaze fall to the floor as you nodded, feeling the lump in your throat grow even bigger.
“Oh Y/N, I love you so much. Can´t you see that? I´m head over heels for you, you are my everything”, Gwilym said, placing both of his hands on your cheeks. “I´m so sorry if I have ever made you feel unloved, unattractive. Because I think you´re the most beautiful girl in the whole world. I mean it. I don´t care that you´re not like everyone else, that´s why you´re special. Special to me. In fact, I love your body. Your stomach, your thighs, everything about you makes me love you more every day”
Gwilym´s thumbs rubbed circles onto your cheeks, his gaze burning into your skin. You reached up to pull his hands away, but he wouldn´t let you. Sighing, you reached out to play with the material of his now soaked t-shirt.
“That´s just something you´re saying to make me feel better”, you muttered.
“It´s absolutely not, Y/N. You´re perfect just the way you are. I can´t believe I´m lucky enough to call you mine”, he said, his face desperate. “Please, don´t leave me”
His voice was barely above a whisper, tears flowing down his face. This time it was your turn to wrap your arms around him and pull him close. You both just stood there, in the middle of the bathroom floor, sobbing.
“I don´t want to”, you said as you pulled away, letting your hands fall flat against his chest.
“Then don´t. Please, I´m begging you. I love you so much”
“I´m sorry, Gwilym. I-I don´t know what came over me”, you said, sniffling as you tried to stop the tears.
He offered you a soft smile, his hands rubbing circles onto your back.
“The first day I met you I knew you were the one, I knew I had to have you”, Gwilym said, reaching up to tuck a lock of your hair behind your ear. You leaned into his hand, turning to place a kiss onto the palm of it.
“Really?”, you asked, feeling your heart flutter.
“Yes, you were wearing that dress that hugs your figure so perfectly. Your beautiful laugh filling the room, my favorite sound in the entire world. And when I saw you naked for the first time I had to concentrate on not passing out, and certainly on not cumming in my pants”, he said, his face breaking into a smile at the end.
A giggle escaped your mouth, feeling your nerves slowly start to fade away.
“You really are perfect, Y/N. I fall more in love with you each day, and I can´t wait to marry you one day. Grow old with you”, Gwilym said, leaning down to press his lips to yours. The kiss was wet with both your tears, but you felt like a weight was lifted off your shoulders. Gwilym was yours, and he loved you.
“I love you, Gwilym. I´m sorry I´m such a mess”, you said as he pulled away.
“Nonsense”, Gwilym smiled before kissing you again. “You have nothing to be sorry about, we all have our off days. I just need you to tell me next time, okay? I don´t want you to deal with this on your own. I´ve been going mad these last few days thinking about what I might have done wrong”
“Okay, I will try. Thank you, Gwilym”
“That´s what boyfriends are for, right?”, he teased, raising an eyebrow and grinning at you.
“I love you so much, you dork”, you giggled, pulling him down to your lips again. You could feel the familiar sensation of his beard rubbing against your skin as he pulled you closer, slowly pushing his tongue past you lips and deepening the kiss. It was laced with so much love it almost took your breath away, completely melting into his touch.
“Come on, let’s get you dressed, you´re freezing”, Gwilym said as he ran his warm hands up and down your bare arms. “I´ll be in bed with your favorite snacks and Netflix at the ready when you come out, okay?”
You nodded, feeling his lips against your forehead for a second before he walked out. You turned around to look at yourself in the mirror again, but this time a smile spread over you face. Yeah, you might not be perfect, but you were perfect for Gwilym. And that´s all that matters.
Hi there folks! We’re here to celebrate 300 followers!! Yay! 🎉💫
This is a prompt list we put together to have a little fun of our on with your suggestions!
(Shout out to @frcddiesmercury and @theborhapboysawakenedmywhatever, from whom we’ve ‘stolen’ some of the Quotes you see below. We hope you guys don’t mind love ya ❤ )
What you have to do is choose a number from each section below (or just one if you want, we’ll figure out the rest) and send us via ask!
Examples of format you can send us:
Joe Mazzello, Quote [48], Fluff [2]
Lucy Boynton & Rami Malek, Fluff [10]
Roger Taylor, Quote [22], Smut [other: …]
Requests are gonna be open for about a week (roughly until August the 1st, aka next Thursday, at 12am UTC+2, CEST) so hurry up! We’ll post the blurb/one-shot as soon as it’s ready. 🤸🏽♀️☀
We’re looking forward to knowing what you guys have in mind!
Have fun folks! 🖤
Note from the writers: we’re gonna try and please you guys as much as we can, that means sometimes stepping outside our comfort zone. Please know that we reserve the right not to write anything that makes us uncomfortable or that might make our followers uncomfortable. We hope you understand our point ♥
Cheers, folks
xx
CHARACTER/s
from Queen (70s / 80s / 90s)
John Deacon
Brian May
Freddie Mercury
Roger Taylor
from Borhap
Lucy Boynton
Ben Hardy
Gwilym Lee
Rami Malek
Joe Mazzello
Note: If you want, you can request a story between two of the characters above.
QUOTES
“You look so sexy when you’re ignoring me.”
“You’re so hot when you’re angry.”
“You couldn’t handle me even if I came with a user manual.”
“I may be a mess, but I’m the hottest mess you’ve ever seen.”
“Look him in the eyes and just try to tell me he isn’t the devil.”
“Forgive me if I’m misreading things, but do you want to make out?”
“You’re telling me you’ve never had an orgasm?”
“You look so good down there.”
“Show me how you touch yourself.”
“Close your legs.”
“Make me.”
“Look at me.”
“Is that my shirt?”
“The only way you’re getting off is on my thigh.”
“I’ll take my shirt off when your pants are gone.”
“I uh, had a dream about you last night.”
“Have you really never had a threesome before?”
“I had no idea you were into that.”
“Don’t just stand there looking at me.”
“There’s something I need to get off my chest.”
“I can’t believe I’m telling you this.”
“I don’t often get the chance to talk to someone like you.”
“The way you flirt is shameful.”
“I won’t hesitate to throw you under the bus if we get caught.”
“Of course we’re best friends. No one else would put up with our shenanigans.”
“Would you mind coming with me for a minute?”
“Give me one good reason why I should wear that dress.”
“Oh my god. You’re in love with her/him.”
“Well? What happened? I want all the details!”
“Did you enjoy yourself last night?”
“Aw, no, I’ve hated you since the day we met.”
“I’m sorry. I thought you were someone else.”
“Why do you have that look on your face?”
“Do you still love me?”
“I love you, okay?”
“It’s so hard for me to hate you right now.”
“I think that’s enough wine.”
“How could you ask me that?”
“Hey, you left your bra at my place.”
“Is this really the end?”
“Any particular reason you’re holding my lingerie?”
“Why don’t you leave those pretty little heels on?”
“You can rest, I’ll stay right here.”
“Cigarettes and cheap perfume, huh?”
“Don’t interrupt me!”
“It reminds me of her/him.”
“How did you find me?”
“Let me walk you home.”
“I always thought we were more than friends.”
“We’re not ‘fine’!”
Other: Something of your choice
FLUFF
He/She asks you out
First date
First “I love you”
Moving in together
He/She proposes
Wedding day
Anniversary
Birthday
Going on holiday together
Going out with friends
You tell them you’re pregnant
You overhear them talking to their friends about you
One of you is sick and the other takes care of them
You feel ashamed of your body and they reassure you
“Hello~~ Can I just say that your fics are the bomb 😍😍 I literally can’t wait for more!!! I was hoping if I can request an angst imagine. It can be anyone from queen or the cast!! Also any scenario! Thank ya 😘” -Anon
Warning: ANGST
A/N: so i don’t consider myself to be good at writing angst bc i’m all about the fluff but hopefully y’all like this one !! also thank you anon for the request! (i can finally brush up on writing angst) happy (or sad) reading! <3 this could also be read as gwilym!brian if you’d like.
He looked at you through the glass window with an affectionate gaze, smiling softly at the sight of you sitting on the couch in the recording room, in your comfy jumper, reading glasses resting on the bridge of your nose, with your favorite book in hand. Brian thought you were absolutely gorgeous, even in the simple state you were in.
He was currently sitting on a chair inside the recording booth, fixing his guitar and what not. Making sure you stayed focused on reading your book, he continued to stare at you, and he couldn’t help but get lost in a daydream.
“Of course I’ll marry you, you idiot!” You shouted at your boyfriend, who was currently down on his one knee, holding the most beautiful ring you ever saw. He chuckled as he stood up, finally putting the ring on your ring finger before pulling you into a warm embrace, your face buried in his chest.
He pulled away to see your tear-stained face, some of your mascara going along with it. “You made me ruin my makeup, Bri,” You pouted, making him chuckle. He wiped your cheeks with his hand, and pressed his lips against against your damp cheek. “I love you so much, (Y/N),” He said softly as he gazed into your (E/C) eyes.
You smiled fondly at your curly-haired fiancé, “I love you too, Brian,” You stood on the tips of your toes, leaning in to finally kiss his soft lips deeply, snow continuing to fall from the sky.
Next thing you know, you were waiting outside the wooden door that leads to the chapel, clad in a long white gown, face hidden behind a sheer veil, and holding a bouquet of flowers that your mother helped you choose.
Your thoughts were interrupted as you heard the wooden doors start to creak open, slowly revealing the beautifully decorated chapel, filled with your family and friends. You breathe in, slowly walking down the aisle, heading towards the love of your life waiting at the altar.
Brian looked at your figure walking towards him, his breath hitched, tears threatening to escape his eyes. He couldn’t even comprehend how doubtlessly beautiful you were. It was like he fell in love with you again. It was like it was just you and him in the chapel, no one else around, just the two of you.
Just the two of you.
That’s all he ever wanted.
To get married, to have kids, to grow old together.
And you’re the one he wants to experience all of these with.
However,
Brian noticed a certain blond drummer entering the recording room, interrupting the quiet atmosphere you were in while you were deep inside the world of your book. You looked up from your book, smiling at Roger before standing up to be wrapped up in his arms.
Brian could only watch through the window, both of you pulling away before Roger lifted your chin up, so his lips could meet yours.
(part 3 of LOVE OF MY LIFE series; check out my masterlist for previous parts)
this one’s longer because I made all of you wait way too long
I'm just the pieces of the man I used to be
Too many bitter tears are raining down on me
I'm far away from home
And I've been facing this alone
For much too long
Last week was by far the most irritated with everything he remembered being. Every rehearsal has ended up with him either smashing his drums or starting a fight over whatever bullshit that could likely piss him off.
It could be anything. From Deaky’s sassy comments, through not enough cigarettes in the pack, Freddie being late, or a broken drumstick in the middle of recording.
Everything seemed to get on his nerves, and though others wouldn’t admit it, they were slowly losing their patience too.
“Roger darling, maybe you should just go, have a shag and relax. Cooling down won’t kill you.” Freddie exclaimed from the piano as Roger kept kicking his bass drum, in an attempt to focus.
“Oh fuck cooling down! I can’t play when I’m calm!”
“I’d like to point out that we haven’t recorded anything decent in a month, so clearly your rule doesn’t apply.” Deaky spoke coming up with 2 cups of coffee, one for himself, one for Freddie, at which Roger flipped him off with a huff. He knew they were right, but was far too proud to give in.
Nothing helped him to brush away the painful feeling in his chest. Seeing you has awakened some sort of bittersweet feeling that he’s been keeping hidden for the sake of carefree life. And there you were, glowing, shining even. So unaware of the pain you’ve caused him, so sweetly naive. Though he couldn’t blame you, after all he never said he got over it, maybe he just assumed you’d notice that he’s trying to be better. Better for you.
After hours of pointless sitting without achieving neither consensus, nor a single well recorded minute, Miami; with Brian’s help, dismissed Roger home. He wasn’t so happy about it, feeling as if he’d been betrayed, but decided it’s a chance for him to possibly get some sleep without those nagging thoughts he was getting at night.
Throwing his jacket and keys onto the sofa he gazed around the living room. If you could have seen that mess, you’d probably break up with him again, he thought.
Empty glasses and bottles were covering almost every piece of furniture, some of them were even scattered on the floor. Not to mention cigarettes. Horrendous amounts of them. He didn’t even think about opening the windows to let some fresh air in until that moment.
You would do that. You would force him to leave that smoky room every once in a while. You would care about getting things cleaned up. So maybe, just maybe he could do that for himself too.
Thinking about you again made that bitterness in his stomach sink even deeper, to the point of making him feel sick. Opening the balcony, he slowly stepped outside, dusty city breeze hitting him immediately and providing some sort of severe relief.
The sky was pretty grey, clouds covered the entirety of the skyline. Some kids were shouting from afar, sounds of water splashing from the neighbours’s pool.
Not looking away from the sky, his right hand wandered to the back pocket of his corduroy burgundy trousers. You hated them. You hated when he was smoking too, but since you two weren’t together anymore, he stopped trying to quit. And stopped caring so much about his appearance too.
He lit the cigarette and placed lighter he had bought on tour in America on the parapet.
Yeah, maybe he could get better. But it seemed so impossible when you weren’t the reason to.
Torn between the lover
And the love you leave behind
You're headed for disaster
'Cause you never read the signs
Too much love will kill you - every time.
He’s given you every proof that he still loved you, that he still couldn’t stop thinking about you when all you did was try to forget.
And it felt like shit. You were feeling like a traitor for making such a selfish decision, for leaving him, for giving him back your engagement ring. For putting him in your past, when in reality all he ever wanted was to be present in yours.
It was during the nights, when your mind wandered to the day of your breakup two years ago, when you had decided to end it all. The wind was blowing outside your window, not letting your thoughts drift away with sleep.
It was almost funny, how despite having a new partner, the one you planned to marry, all you could see was the look of sorrow on Roger’s face. The glistening of his disappointed eyes, the restlessness written in his brows and clenched jaw, his hollow cheeks and plucked lips, slightly open and almost trembling from the amount of emotions he’s been dealing with.
All because of you.
The more you were recalling, the more details you noticed. The more self doubts you were having.
“Brian? Umm, it’s _____.”
“_____! Long time no hear, huh?” It was past 4pm when you decided to call the person you knew and trusted enough with your concerns. You fiddled with flowers in the flacon as you thought of words to say. Brian was Roger’s long time friend, one of the best friends even, so without a doubt your whole plan was risky. Especially with the aftermaths of yours and Roger’s last meeting.
At the same time, who else could help you if not his best mate.
“Yeah, sorry if I’m interrupting! And... for not giving a sign of life for so long.” Your nervousness was clear, Brian didn’t need to see you to realize how difficult it was for you to call him. And it kind of broke him.
“No no! I actually just got back home, so you chose the right time.” Brian’s voice was so soothingly reassuring. Unbelievable how you two haven’t seen each other in a year or so, but he still managed to keep that friendly manner of his. Almost if nothing has changed. “It’s great to hear you.” A genuine smile appeared on your face and you could only wish he was able to see that.
“You too Bri. Still building guitars and destroying schemes?”
“Trying to.” He laughed. “Umm...What about you? I heard you’re, uh, stabilising soon?”
“He told you, right?”
“Well. It was hard not to hear when he forced everyone to listen to his drunk rambling one day.”
“Oh god.” You sat heavily on the sofa and exhaled over the phone. On the other side Brian leaned himself against the counter. Some time ago he’s promised himself not to get too engaged in Roger’s life choices and decisions. But even if he acted the opposite, he was more than devastated once he had found out about your broken engagement with Roger. “What did he say?”
Brian rubbed the tip of his nose with index finger as he struggled to choose the right words.
“That, uh... apparently you’re getting married and he didn’t realize it was for real until now.” Even if Roger never said that out loud, he kept his faith that one day you’ll change your mind. That it’s just a phase of yours, and that you need time. In a way, he was right. You did need time. But you no longer needed him. Or so you thought. “And that he, uh, he still loves you, which frankly speaking actually explains a lot of his recent behaviour.”
You took a deep breath. Back then, when you had decided to pack your bags and move on, you had thought that the hardest part is already behind you. What you did not expect, was Roger’s inability to let go. And that was leading you back to something you hoped to remove from your perfect breakup scenario. Doubts.
“Brian... I’m so sorry, I-I don’t even know what to say.”
“Oh! No need to apologize me _____. I shouldn’t even get involved in all this. This is your life after all.”
The phone line went silent for a while, none of you really keen on adding anything, mainly cause there was nothing more to add.
It was inevitable - no matter how much you wanted to avoid it, you had to talk to Roger.
“Um, I mean, you’ll do whatever you decide, and I’m sure you won’t regret it, but could I give you advice?” Brian’s voice was filled with both concern and care, something so brother-like.
“Of course Bri! God knows I need it...”
Brian chuckled at your words, but continued with serious voice. It sounded almost sad.
“Let your heart decide. I know how hard it is, I know you’ve been hurting, but remember those lessons and learn from them. I’m not going to convince you to anything, just know that sometimes rationality is not the best advisor. You’re strong _____. But don’t give up your vulnerability in order to keep it.”
You quickly wiped a tear that ran down your face with the back of your hand.
“Thank you Bri. I think I needed that.”
“Take care _____. And call more often! We all miss you.”
„You too Brian. Miss you all.”
That night you didn’t sleep. Your mind wandered elsewhere, through time you’ve lost, the one you saved, the time that was gone forever and the one that was ahead of you.
Like a twist of fate, your fiance was away so you’ve spent the night alone. Figuring out what to do with your indecisive heart.
~~~~~
next chapter in the works, so hopefully I won’t make you all wait as much next time!
(Comments, ideas and words of notice are always appreciated 💜)
SERIES taglist: taglist: @laubluered @ceruleanrainblues @rogersfalsettos @shae-is-not-ok @i-am-sarah @magicwithaknife @isabella-bby
Roger Taylor taglist: @rogersdrumkit @rogersfalsettos @erinhardytaylor @cyborgfromthesupermarket @sabbrriiinnaa @wolverinesbeer @simplyvictoria-93 @imamazzellhoe @shishterfackisback @rogerstambourinee @rockyroadthepastryarchy
Summary:You’re just a simple girl, who happens to be in the wrong place in the wrong time. Your life gets a complete turnaround when you are sucked into the mob world of guns, violence, death and no mercy. You have to learn their ways if you want to stay alive, but will that help when you meet the Don? The boss of all mob bosses?
Words: 7k+
Warnings: lots of strong language, mature themes, graphic violence, graphic death, weapons, contraband ; Smut and kinks; some slowburn moments.
Who’s who:
Ben - The Gun
Joe - Mad Joe
Gwilym - The Brains
Rami - Nitro
Manchini - rival gang leader
and you (the reader) of course!
A/n: Please, leave me any kind of feedback if you liked the story. I am grateful for criticism, recommendations, ideas, everything. So you if got something you want to say, or just stop by and say hi. I’m always here for you. <3
Now, to the fanfic, here is one bloody long fanfiction. Enjoy:
“I’m going to need somebody to cover the delivery tonight. Make sure everything runs smooth. Can’t trust ‘em Manchini’s.” Ben took a puff and tapped his cigarette in the overflowing ashtray.
“I’ll take it, boss. In a need of some distraction anyway. One Manchini down could do me some good.” Joe stood up energetically from the table.
“Mad Joe.” Ben’s was voice warningly stern.
“Accidental explosions happen...” Joe lifted his arms in the air playfully.
“Just make sure, the shipment is in line.” Ben quirked his left eyebrow.
“Toodles” Joe waved his hand over the shoulder leaving the room.
The rest of the men stood there in silence until they finished their smokes.
“It’s just a lot on his head right now.” Gwilym spoke first.
“He’s doing pretty damn well, considering… well everything.” Rami shook his head.
“Yeah.” Ben nodded with his lips pressed together. “He better get through this sooner than later.”
“It’s been less than a month. Give him some more time. Go easy on him.” Gwilym tried to convince Ben.
“Can’t you see than I am?” Ben muttered through gritted teeth. “Just. Go after him. Make sure he won’t shoot somebody for whatever reason.” Ben exhaled deeply rubbing his eyebrows.
“Alright.” Gwilym agreed and left the room as quickly as possible.
“You look like you need a drink boss.” Rami taped Ben on the shoulder. He nodded in response.
“I’ll meet you down at the club. Need to take care of something first.” Ben lit another cigarette.
Rami left the room, leaving Ben alone on the round table. He sat there staring into the nothing until his smoke was halfway finished. Exhaling a heavy breath he took a few slow steps to the old cabinet.
“That should do it.” He stated, as if he was debating with himself.
Ben took a bottle of a 12 year old MacAllan. He looked at it. But then put it back.
Disposing of another smoke, he took his leather jacket and swiftly put it on. Making his way through the car park, he sat in his car and started the engine.
“We’re all getting revenge for her. Don’t you worry, Joe.” he muttered with his knuckles white on the steering wheel. As he was passing by THE place where less than a month ago they all lost a beloved one to the hand of a rival.
“Took ya long enough.” Rami gave Ben a cheeky smile, as he found himself on the bar with two girls hanging around his neck “The party’s started.”
“I see you’ve been” Ben quirked a brow and checked out the two hot chicks in Rami’s arms “Quite occupied.” he gave him a half smirk.
“This is Cindy and this is Mindy.” Rami pointed one and then the other girl. “So?”
“‘I’m going to get a drink.” Ben tapped his hands on the bar.
“Boss.” Rami slid off the girls and came closer to Ben, who gave him half look without turning his head his direction.
“You alright, boss?” rami put his hand on Ben’s shoulder. “Come on.” he prompted him.
Ben ticked his tongue and shook his head.
“Come on man. Loosen up a bit. When was the last time you got laid?” Rami’s tipsy figure was far less entertaining than he thought.
“Since when do keep Me in check?” Ben gritted his teeth annoyingly.
“Was just tryna lighten you up. You know. You keep saying Joe is doing bad, but it’s you man. It’s you.” rami waved his finger in the air and left to join the girls.
“Pff.” Ben huffed and took a sip of the whiskey in front of him.
“Guess the old fella gots a point here. Might need to tap something tonight. To get it out of my system.” Ben said to himself. He turned and looked around. The bar was full. Full of pretty women.
Maybe Ben was trying too hard to stay afloat, to keep his tough leader presence, but deep down he knew the accident affected him. It affected him in ways he didn’t want him to.
The urge to avenge his sister’s death was great. It was like a never ending fire burning him from the inside, and every past day was only fueling that fire.
There was nothing else on the back of his mind, in fact he realised it really has been all that time. So unlikely. Ben usually tapped the hottest chicks, and he barely ever repeats them, but one. A dancer in the club, named Gracie. All the other girls were always jealous, because she casually is called up to the boss’s penthouse above the club, which Ben owns as well. In fact, the club is just a masquerade, to cover for his mob work. Everybody knew that. And everybody always kept a close eye on how long she has been to the penthouse. “Don’t be jealous, ladies.” Ben would wink to the rest of the women, when he would return shortly after to the bar.
He finished his drink and snapped his fingers to the bartender, pointing where Gracie was dancing tonight. He nodded as Ben turned around at pressed his lips together, overlooking at her, as she hungrily made her way to him.
“Boss.” she giggled, tracing the collar of his shirt.
“What have I told you about such behaviour in public?!” he grabbed her wrist.
“But, don’t you want me anymore?” She pouted her lips like a slut.
“I do. You’re coming upstairs.” Ben dragged her with him to the elevator.
Less than an hour later Gracie went back to her usual spot, but Ben didn’t follow. Instead, he opted for the balcony. He observed the night sky and the glimmering skyline from the top. The large apartment suddenly seemed so empty and vast. Ben felt so lonely and in this particular moment, not even his usual fuck couldn’t help it. Instead of closing in even more, Ben decided to check on Gwil and Joe and their task.
“Hey boss.”
“Don’t you hey me, how the divelry going on? Any men down?”
“Pff, no. Everything’s under control now.”
“That doesn’t sound much in control. Is that a woman's screams I’m hearing?”
“What? Noo. Yes.”
“Cant fucking trust neither of you. Comin over.”
Ben shut the phone down. It was exactly what he needed. An actual distraction. Work.
He threw on a shirt and headed straight to the underground parking, skipping the bar on the way.
When he got to the docks, Ben was less than surprised to find Joe and Gwilym behind a huge crate.
“What kind of weird, twisted game are you two playin? Why the hell you have a woman, tied up and gagged?” Ben rubbed his temple.
“We can explain it all. Let’s just take her and leave this place, asap. I hear cops.” Joe was frantically in a rush.
“Why the cops are coming? What about the shipment? Did it go through?” Ben muttered.
“It did, everything happened almost according to plan. We gotta get the fuck out.” Gwilym explained. Joe tossed youl over his shoulder and the three men vanished in thin air, as the police sirens were approaching.
“Keep her in the warehouse, you two have some explaining to do.” Ben ordered.
Once they arrived at the warehouse, Joe was quick to shove the girl inside and put her in one of the rooms.
“Looking so hot like this.” He bit his lip, as he examined Gwilym’s handiwork on tying you up with whatever kind of rope was available.
“Let me go!” you spat at his face “At once!” “Sorry dear, but whoever you are, you are now part of something serious. Only boss can decide your faith.” Joe put a strand of hair behind your ear, but you took the change to try biting him.
Joe turned around and locked the room behind him. “Feisty”he thought.
“Listening.” Ben crossed his arms in front of his chest.
“She saw it all.” Gwilym rubbed his forehead.
“Saw what exactly?” Ben rolled his eyes.
“Everything. We saw her when we were covering our tracks.” Joe looked like he admitted defeat.
“We obviously cannot let her go, just like that. She’s going straight to the cops.” Ben put his arms on the table.
“I’ll decide what to do with her tomorrow. Keep her on lockdown for now.” Ben lit a smoke and left.
“Great.” Gwilym waved his hands ironically in the air.
“Oh no man. I ain’t stayin all night watching over some girl. You do.” Joe warningly moved past Gwilym.
“Oh no no. That is on you. You’re staying!.” Gwilym nodded his head.
“You’re the smart one, you think of something. I’m done here for today.” Joe stated.
‘Okay, go. I’ll keep an eye.” Gwilym shooed him out of the room.
For the rest of the night you stayed in that room, tied up and scared. You couldn’t show that of course, because, well you knew exactly what these men were. Gangsters, you realised. You’ve only heard of those in movies. But, you knowledge wasn’t enough for you to know how to get away alive.
First thing the next morning, Gwilym, Rami and Joe were at the round table. They were all looking at each other. The tension could be felt even outside the room.
“Why Is there a woman in my lockdown? Let’s start with that!” Ben barged in and hit the table with his wrist.
“How about you calm down first, okay?” Rami felt irritated by Ben’s tone.
“Don’t you tell me. You were getting laid while all this happened.” Ben pointed at Rami, who uncomfortably shrug in his seat.
“Aight aight.” He crosses his arms and pressed his lips together.
“What is done is done, she’s always seen enough to sell us to the cops.” Joe stood up.
“You know the options, boss.” Gwilym looked up to Ben and slowly shook his head from side to side.
“There’s two way she is leaving this warehouse.” Joe’s voice went low.
“With a fun, or in a coffin.” Ben sighed. “I’ll go talk to her and then I’m putting her down.” He made a quick exist.
“He’s not himself.” Rami put his hands down on the table.
“We all need time, Nitro.” Joe huffed and left too.
“I’m going for a drink.” Gwil quickly left too.
Ben walked into the room where you were locked. You had finally falling asleep from all the exhaustion, so you didn’t hear anybody coming in. Ben walked over the bed and sat on the chair. He crossed his arms in front of his chest and took a minute to gather his thoughts. He looked you up and down from head to toe. “Looks so innocent.” he muttered quietly He cocked his head to the side and quirked an eyebrow. He flicked his tongue over his lips and exhaled. The corner of his lip almost curled into a half smile at the look of your casual short floral dress. It was yellow. It reminded Ben of his sister. She used to wear those all the time.
“Hey. Hey. Wake up.” he reached for your shoulder, making you jump all of a sudden. “Calm down. Gonna need you yo talk.” Ben stood off the chair.
You gulped and rose as much as you could. Your hands were still tied. Ben look from your face to your wrists and back and untied them.
“Aaagh.” you rubbed your wrists together.
“Who are you and what you were doing at the docks last night?” Ben brought his chair closer to you.
“I.I dont know anything. I swear!” You looked at the man’s feet. He was dressed more elegant than the others you already met.
“What did you see?” his voice remained calm.
“N-nothing. I swear to god.” You felt your eyes water at the thought of what they are going to do to you.
“Why don’t you start by, why you were there?” Ben was starting to get irritated.
“Was just, having a walk.”
“Now, tell me, really, why you were there.” Ben crossed his arms in front of his chest, again.
“My boyfriend left me.” you rolled your eyes and looked down.
“Hey.” Ben lifted your chin, forcing you to look him in the eye. This was the first time, you looked at his face. It looked almost angelic, but tough at the same time. His green eyes, were like the devil. Beautiful, but dangerous. His lips were small but plump and they were bright raspberry color, so inviting, yet so rough.
“Were you abused?” Ben broke the silence.
You shook your head “It wasn’t like that. I ran away…” your eyes fell to the floor once again.
“I see.” Ben stood up and made a few steps around the small room. He rubbed his eyes and ran his fingers through his hair.
“The thing is. I cannot let you go. Under no circumstance, you are leaving here, free.”
“I won’t tell anybody, I won’t tell no cops, nobody. Please, just let me leave.” you pleaded.
“You either join my gang, or stay locked in forever.” Ben pointed his index finger in the air.
“You have until tomorrow to decide.” He stated and locked the door behind him.
“We got nothing to loose.” Rami looked optimistic.
“Nitro’s right. With the Manchini situation, this could be a sign. A good sign.” Gwilym was enthusiastic.
“Aye from me.” Joe raised his hand.
“So it’s decided. She might prove useful after all.” Ben agreed.
“And I know just exactly how.” Gwilym waved his finger in the air.
“Listenin’ Brains.” Joe shifted in his seat, adjusting the table.
“I got intel, that Paolo Manchini is going to be at the Rossario this Thursday night, aaand he likes the company of attractive women.” Gwilym’s face formed a wide grin.
“And, I prefer not to risk any of my women with the task, they’re far too valuable to loose in such a pathetic way.” Ben nodded.
“We get her all dressed up, wire her up, and she can do the rest. Easy peasy!” Rami exclaimed.
“Whoa, not so fast, Nitro. Mad Joe, whatcha thinkin?” Ben looked at Joe.
“All in for the idea. We got nothing to loose. She gets shot, not problemo; she does what she’s told and doesn’t get shot, all perfetto.” Joe stated.
“Good. Brains, get the tech ready. Mad Joe, I want to see numbers, and Nitro, make sure she’s not in there, when we blow the place up. I will take care of the rest.” Ben stood from the table.
“Been waiting for this, for god knows how many months now.” Joe cracked his knuckles, while papers were coming out of the printer. “Hello offshore bank accounts.”
“Somebody might even think you have gone mad.” Rain laughed as he passed by Joe.
“Damn right. Look at this baby.” joe handed him one of the papers.
“Sexy.” Rami ticked his tongue.
“Pretty marvellous, isn’t she?” Joe smirked.
“And what are we going to do with this and the rest of your smuggled accounts?” Rami ran his finger over the pile of folders.
“Precaution, of course. It’s all legal.” Joe lifted his arm.
“Why so much this time?” Rami suspiciously lifted one eyebrow.
“Boss wants to make sure.” Joe nodded, obviously he wasn’t allowed to say.
“Alright. Toodles for now.” Rami turned on his heel.
“Bye.” Joe buried himself in his desk again.
“And Joe, don’t got batshit crazy.” Rami knocked on the doorframe before leaving.
“Can’t promise that, mate.” Joe shouted from behind the fortress of paperwork.
“Hey.” Ben entered your room “You ready to talk? Made your choice.”
“Yes.” You seemed to have gained some confidence in the last couple of days being held hostage there, only, nobody was looking for you. Which, kind of made you a permanent hostage.
“Listen, girl. I don’t have all day. Talk.” Ben commanded, almost hurrying to leave.
“You need me, so I heard.” You perked your nose up.
“Huh.” Ben huffed and licked his lips.
“I will help you, but with a few conditions.” You stated.
“Not like you got a choice.” Ben grabbed your wrist, vanishing all confidence from your body.
“You belong to this gang now. You are our hostage. You belong to my men. You...” Ben came extremely close to your face “Belong to me now.”
His bright green eyes were full of darkness and power, lust you might even say. You didn’t know if you were scared or almost aroused by his stern actions.
“Ouch. Let go of me.” You wriggled, trying to free your wrist from his grip. You had to break the, is he going hurt you or kiss you, kind of moment, because the tension was electrical. The seconds between him letting go of you felt like a million years.
“You know why they call me The Gun?” Ben gritted his teeth.
You gulped, but couldn’t dare to speak.
“Because I resolve issues with it. And you seem like quite the trouble right now.” Ben licked his bottom lip and cocked his head to the side.
You batted your eyelashes and pressed your lips together, because you weren’t in the position to object. If you wanted to stay alive of course.
“You’ll be given instructions tonight on what to do during your mission.” Ben turned around and shut
the door behind his back.
“Damn it.” You muttered under your nose.
“She’s trouble, boss.” Gwilym scathed his beard.
“No shit Sherlock!” Ben faked a surprised face.
”No need for that Ben.” Joe walked in.
“What do we need then?” Ben huffed.
“Give her good training, that will break her and I think she may be useful more than once.” Rami suggested.
“Agree with Nitro.” Gwilym chimed in.
“I’ll see what she’s capable of, as soon as tonight.” Ben concluded.
“Uh-uh” Rami squinted his eyes and have Ben a smirk. “Somebody wants a bite of the new snack.” His smirk grew even bigger.
“Fuck up, Nitro.” Ben lifted a brow.
Rami lifted a brow to him as well, as they spoke without words. Real bros in life and crime. They understand each other telepathically. Pfhahaha*Author’s comment*
Later that night, Ben felt restless. He had finished all work for the day, everything was going according to plan. Everybody knew exactly what they were doing, except for. Well, you, who were still in the unknown of your future. Ben walked over to his bedroom balcony, with a glass of scotch in his hand and a smoke in the other.
He looked at the magnificent view from his tower. Then looked closely, he could see everybody in the club downstairs. All those people, who only care about 3 things in life: sex, alcohol and drugs. Oh and money to spend on those three of course, so that makes 4. “How pathetic” he huffed, taking a sip. He then thought of what he has said to the rest of the lads. About testing your capabilities. Since he felt restless, he changed into sweats and shirt and took off to the warehouse, where you were held.
“Hey, hey. You awake?” You heard a soft voice in the dark, coming from the door.
“Who’s there?” You tried to see, but the light from the corridor was blinding the man.
“Guess, I never introduced myself properly. I’m Ben.” He walked over your bed, as you rubbed your adjusting to the light eyes.
“Hi Ben.” you yawned.
“How should I call you?” his voice sounded oddly friendly.
“Don’t matter, you were gonna kill me anyway.” you looked straight into his eyes.
“If you want to stay live, you’d need a nickname anyway. Will figure it out on the move..” Ben blinked at you, which left you quite puzzled.
“Let’s get up. We got so much work to do.” he patted your knee.
“So this is how you hold the gun.” Ben was carefully focused on keeping your hands steady.
“When do I shoot?” You pouted your lips.
“Whoa, take it easy. You got quite the fantasy.” Ben chuckled and it made you blush. Given the distance and position he was in, you could inhale nothing but his scent. So manly and bad, but with hidden caring underneath, which you couldn’t quite figure, yet.
“Focus.” He whispered in your ear.
“I. I am. “ you fixed your position, straightening up your body.
“Your finger goes into the hole. And keep it steady, okay?” He softly spoke. You could swear he was nuzzling his nose in your hair.
“And I pull.” you confidently finished his sentence.
“That’s right.” he held his breath. “Do it. Pull the trigger.”
You moved your focus on the target, aiming for the center and pulled the trigger with force. The power kicked you a step back, but Ben never left your side, so he already was there, expecting you. Waiting to catch you before you fall.
“You can open your eyes now.” He chuckled.
“Phew.” You breathed out “how bad was it?”
“Don’t worry about it.” He took the gun from your shaky hands.
“So I did extremely bad.” Your head fell down.
“Said not to worry. Let’s try again. Here.” He handed you the gun.
You carefully took it. Ben extended his arm over yours and held your hands with his. It felt so unreal , you forgot you were in the devil’s lair.
“Now shoot.” You felt Ben’s lips over your ear, his hot breath gliding over your neck, you felt that electricity once again and gained the confidence to pull the trigger. This time it sounded louder and you jumped back, curling straight into Ben’s arms.
“Whose arms are you going to run into when you have to shoot tomorrow?” Ben chuckled, brushing your arm.
“Huh?” You looked up.
“I won’t be behind you the next time.” He put a strand of hair behind your ear.
“I. I have to manage. Somehow.” You licked your lips, staring at his.
Before you knew it, his lips were pressed against yours.
“Sorry.” He stepped back.
“No, I’m sorry, it just- ”
“No, completely, I shouldn’t have.” He shook his head.
“This is so wrong.” your palm aligned with his.
“Very, very wrong.” He muttered before pulling you in for a kiss again.
His hands grabbed your wait and pulled you in his brace, as you stepped up on your toes to reach for him. Your hands wrapped around his neck, as if they were always meant to be, and you kissed him back. His lips felt plump and tasty like cherries, you just wanna bite. He hungrily swiped his tongue between your lips and it was all you needed to let him in. Your tongue glided with his, savouring each other, passionately dancing. You knew this nervous feeling in your stomach was true all this time. It was lust and immediate passion. That’s why you always felt so intimidated by him, at unease. Every contact with him made you nervous, and now it felt like, it all made sense.
“You should be more than ready for the mission tomorrow.” he pulled away from you and grabbed your hand. Bringing you to the room you were locked in, he pushed you in. This time he didn’t lock the door or chain you up or anything. You were practically given a green light to plan an escape.
“Gather your strength for the rest of the night, you gon need it tomorrow.” Ben disappeared, just as fast as he appeared.
“I’ll be damned.” Ben muttered to himself as he poured himself a glass of bourbon from the top shelf in the meeting room.
“Can’t sleep boss?” Gwilym appeared on the doorstep “It’s the girl, isn’t it?” he cocked his head to the side.
“Do you absolutely always have to know everything?” Ben lit a smoke.
“So it is her. Look, I aint no life advisor or expert, but a good bang might you some good. Tap that, you have it.” Gwilym lit a cigarette as well, taking a seat next to Ben.
“No wonder, they call you The Brains.” Ben lift an eyebrow at Gwilym.
“You know the rules, she’s at your disposal to do as you please, but don’t get distracted. Women turn men’s heads into marshmallow. Look at Joe.” Gwil ticked his tongue.
“Sometimes I feel more sorry for him, than I do for me, you know?” Ben took another big gulp “Besides the fact he was screwing my sister, love did fuck him up. And look now, he’s gone completely mad.” he shook his head.
“But you need to get your shit together and avenge her. Love brought men no good.” Gwilym took a long puff and put the smoke away. “Mark my words, boss. Fuck all the women you want, but don’t fall in love. Been down this hoe before, not getting in there again.” Gwilym patted Ben on the shoulder and left.
“You know what are you doing?” Joe fixed a gun on your ribcage, underneath your shirt.
“Hey, easy!.” you pushed his arm away.
“Don’t get handsy” Ben passed by, tapping Joe on the shoulder.
“All set up, you can go to Gwil now.” Joe finished installing all the armor on your body.
You tried to walk normally, adjusting to all the pieces hanging underneath your clothes over the Brains.
“Just to make sure you remember the plan, and nothing goes wrong, we’ll go over it now.” Gwilym put on his eyeglasses and had you sat on a table at the corner of the room.
It was their warehouse, the place where they keep all the machinery, the place where the real business happens. On one corner you could see Joe and his desk full of papers, ashtrays and guns. To the other side was Rami’s corner. His side was the cleanest. He had carefully ordered cabinets with explosives, which looked like trophies. You turned your head to your left and saw Ben. The kiss that happened was bugging you to hell and back, but you had to concentrate on the plan now, if you wanted to stay alive after tonight.
“Fantasia. Fantasia! FANTASIA!” you heard Ben marching towards you.
“That will be your code name now.” Ben looked around to make sure the guys heard him right.
“Fantasia it is.” Gwil shook his head.
“Oh, okay I guess…” you didn’t quite know how to react to that.
The rest of the time you spend observing these men and their work. After all this time you spent there, they didn’t seem to look like they did when you first met them. They were not as scary as before, and you were becoming something more than a hostage. You were becoming part of their gang. “Am i mobster now?” ask yourself, and giggled at the thought of it.
“It’s time.” Ben took your hand in his.
“So soon?” You almost whined.
“You can do this.” Ben looked straight into your eyes and suddenly all hesitation and fear was gone.
“We’ll be right here. We can hear everything, and if things start endangering, you know the signal.” Ben helf your palm in his “Just make sure, you get the information, you are there to collect, and that Manchini has a taste for women.” he gulped at the last word.
“Okay, yes. I’m a woman, I can be a woman, seductive, even… I mean, look at me.” you gestued your body. “All glammed and armed up. Nothing will go wrong.” You nodded your head. “Right?”
“Of course. No go and don’t get killed.” The men assured you.
You walked inside the fancy restaurant and looked around, but could not recognise the man from the pictues.
“He’s not here.” you whispered.
“He’ll come soon. Wait at the bar. Order a dry martini.”
You did exactly as you were told, making your way towards the bar. For split moment, you felt awesome in your high heels, smokey makeup, long silky dress and the gun underneath it. But soon the moment was gone, when you noticed the man entering. As if he knew you, he took a seat next to you.
“Your class is empty senorita. The next drink is on me.” He waved to the bartender.
“To whom do I owe the pleasure?” You slowly turned to him, uncrossing and then crossing your legs again.
“You can call me however you want, senorita.” he was grinning.
“Ew, that was low, even for him.” you heard Ben in your earpiece.
“What do you do?” You pretended you didn’t hear that.
“I’m a businessman.” He swirled his mustache with his fingers.
“What kind of business is that you do?” you tried your best look less disgusted.
“None of it concerns your pretty head.” he smirked.
You cleared your throat and smiled to the man, continuing the small talk. It didn’t take more than 20 minutes, before he was persuading you go with him. You started to panic, because it never was in the plan to go anywhere with him, and you certainly could not fire a gun at him in the middle of the restaurant with all his men surrounding.
“This is going nowhere. He is taking her to the back room, Gwil.” Ben stared into the security cameras in the van.
“Okay, okay, relax. She’s got guns n everything.” Rami tried to convince him.
“Damn right she does. I’m going in.” Ben was ready to crash the whole thing.
“Hey, hey, hold on. You will not go in!” Joe pushed him back in his seat “You go in now, we blow the whole thing. She gets shot and you too.”
“Fuckign hell.” Ben kracked the knuckles of his hands.
“She has to get any information, but he. Fuck! He knows.” Gwil shout.
“See? Are we going in now?” Ben lifted his arms in the air.
“He hasn’t slipped a word, and they’re walking towards the back entrance! Go.Go.Go.!” Joe pushed everybody out the doors.
Meanwhile, you were about to faint, because the moment was coming. Either you shoot Manchini, or you get shot. He opened the backdoor for you and gestured you to step outside.
“There goes my life.” you murmured under your nose and took a hesitant step outside. You quickly realised there was nobody visible, you it looked like the perfect timing to draw your gun out and point it at Manchini. You didn’t get any information, but according to Gwil’s plan, if things turned south, you had to shoot him. You tried to be as quick as possible, but the gun got stuck and he was already staring at you when you lifted your eyes.
He laughed and then laughed again. You primary instincts told you step back and to run, but you drew the gun out anyways. Pointing it at Manchini, your hands were shaking.
“LAY DOWN!” you heard a scream followed by gunshots. You dropped to the ground and crawled behind a tank nearby.
It all happened so fast. All these shouting men and gunfire around you. You just closed your eyes and hoped it would all end. But it didn’t. It all became muted and shaky, your vision blurred out.
“This. Is for my sister!” Ben hit Manchini on the face with his fist.
“And this is for Joe!” he hit him in the other side.
Manchini spit his blood in Ben’s face “Her pussy smelled nice.”
“I”LL FUCKIN KILL YOUU!!” Joe came over Manchini and pushed Ben to the side. He started hitting him and punching him with all his force. The lust for vengeance had taken over both men, so they kept beating the shit outta him, before Ben took his gun and shot straight at his head.
“She shall rest in peace now.” Joe whispered, as a few burning tears streamed down his cheeks.
“I love you, little sister.” Ben muttered and tapped Joe on his arm.
“Let’s go.” Joe and Ben turned around and made their way to the van.
“Finally!” Gwil sarcastically remarked.
“Now that we’re all avenged and done with Manchini, we have this little problem.” Rami pointed at your unconscious body.
“Is she alive?” Ben lifted a brow, while brushing blood off his face.
“She’s just passed out. Will wake up soon.” Gwil concluded.
“Forgot, you were the doctor.” Rami made a sarcastic remark.
“Poor thing.” Bet sat on the seat next to you and started examining your state.
Your dress was all dirty and ripped, your face had a few scratches and your hair was messed.
“Still pretty.” Ben muttered.
“You said something, boss?” Rami lifted a brow at Ben.
“Keep driving.” Ben answered.
“We all gotta get cleaned up, and prepare. Manchini’s men won’t hesitate to attack back at us for killing their leader.” Joe stated.
“At least she did help.” Ben looked quite bemused.
“Okay, boss?” Joe patted him on the shoulder.
“I’m fine. I’m more than fine, Joe. we did it. We avenged her.” Ben almost sobbed.
“Boss, you and Joe, deserve to take rest of the night off. We can take care of it.” Rami chimed in.
“Intend to.” Ben rubbed his eyes.
“Been forever, since a shower felt as nice.” Ben rested his head against the tiles on the wall. Closing his eyes he let it all pass though his body. Memories started bursting in, from the moment his sister fell dead in his arms, to her funeral. To Joe, his second hand and best friend. Ben felt sad about Joe, he wasn’t always like this. He was always the calm one, the mathematical one. Now he was something more of a monster than human. Ben then remembered when they brought you in. The corner of his mouth curved into half smile. He remembered how idiotically Joe and Gwilym brought you in. He then thought of you. You actually turned braver and tougher to get killed than he thought. “Impressed.” he muttered.
“Impressed by what?” Ben hear a voice, which startled him in place.
“Goddamnit, haven’t you heard of knockin?” Ben angrily turned around “How did you even get in here?”
“The boys let me in.” Gracie started taking her mini dress off.
“Go home.” he shooed her out.
“I can help.” She stepped closer to the shower.
“No need. Not tonight.” Ben passed her and wrapped a towel around his waist. He barged out of the bathroom, passed along his penthouse and went straight into the warehouse. Gracie ran after him. Just on the corridor, she saw you looking at Ben passing by and then at her.
You had just woken up a few moments ago and were looking for Ben and his men. Somehow the whole scene hit you. It hit you hard. You didn’t even know why you felt so intimidated. Was it his wet naked muscular body, or was it the fact that a woman ran after him? You had so many questions. Nothing had happened between you two, you just shared a moment, a kiss. “This meant nothing” you muttered to yourself, while returning back to the room you woke up.
It all felt so strange, you couldn't quote figure were you angry, jealous, or it was just the adrenaline from earlier that night.
“Explanation. NOW!” Ben hit his fist on the table.
“Easy tiger.” Rami spoke first.
“I don’t need no babysitting. Understood? And I certainly don’t need any of you to tell me when I need sex!” He stormed off the room and returned to his flat upstairs.
On the terrace he saw you.
“Needed to get away from everything for a moment. I’ll leave right away. Wouldn’t bother you and your girlfriend.” your turned around and passed by Ben.
“Wait.” he stopped you, grabbing your arm “She’s not my girlfriend.” his words were stone cold.
“Whatever she is, is something to you. And I’m not, so I’ll leave you now.” You tried to pull your arm away from him, but instead he pulled you in.
With one swift move you you were wrapped around his arms, your noses barely touching. You both closed your eyes and felt each other’s heartbeat for a moment, before you lifted yourself on your toes and pressed your lips against his. They felt warm, hot even, like a thousand butterflies were fluttering in your stomach.
“I only want you.” Ben muttered against your lips and pulled away to look in your eyes. You looked back at him. All fear and darkness was gone. His green eyes were vibrant, almost watery. You nodded and kissed him again. This time he kissed you more passionately than before and wrapped his arm around your chest, lifting you easily. Your hands flew to his neck buried in his hair, you tucked on it, when you hear him silently moan against your lips.
Your breathing got heavier when he ran his tongue over your bottom lip, asking for permission. You gladly opened your mouth and let his tongue devour you. Your tongue played in synchronised rhythm with his, like you always knew exactly how to kiss each other. His palm was cupping your chin and cheek, while the other held you tight by your lower back.
Both of you walked backwards until hitting the dining table. Ben flipped you over and pressed you against it. His forehead resting against yours, you both needed to catch a breath.
“I need to have you.” he spoke through his teeth, as if he was restraining himself.
“You’ve got me.” You placed your hand over his cheek and kissed him passionately once again. He didn’t waste much time to hop you on the table and spread your legs apart. Situating himself between your thighs, he kept kissing you. His hands were roaming your back, before sliding one between your bodies. He rubbed your stomach before sliding it up under your shirt to your breasts. His hand rubbed your nipple and grabbed your breast. Meanwhile, his lips moved to the soft skin underneath your chin. His tongue traced your collarbone and licked small kisses on your sternum.
“Ben…” you moaned quietly, letting your head fall back, as both of his hands were now playing with your breasts.
“Where you’ve been all this time…” he murmured pepping kisses all over your chest and in the valley between your breasts.
You let another moan, pushing yourself up in his brace, while one arm kept you stable, and the other tugging on his hair.
“Call me SirBen groaned pushing your skirt up and pressing two fingers against your clit.
“Sir…” You whined, pushing yourself firmer against his fingers just to get more friction where you needed it the most.
He hissed and licked his lips, lowering his head to your neck, he sucked on your sensitive skin, while his fingers were agonsiligly rubbing your core through your knickers.
“P-please, sir.” You whined.
“What do you want?” He dunked his teeth into your neck, but then quickly swiped his tongue over the area.
“Need you.” You breathed out.
“Need me what? You gotta talk to me, Fantasia.” Ben kept the same agonisingly slow movements over your soaking underwear.
“I want you to fuck me. Fuck me hard.” You sank your nails into his scalp.
He growled and pulled away from you. With one swift move, the towel around his waist fell to the floor. You couldn’t help but stare at his hard cock and wonder how big it is, that you involuntary were biting your lip.
He stepped between your legs and spread then further again. Cupping your cheeks with his large hands, he kissed you, like the first time.
Your hands automatically slid down between your bodies and reached his rock hard cock. Wrapping gently your finger around the tip, your thumb smeared all the leaking pre cum around. He grunted at your touch and his head onto your shoulder. You slowly dragged your hand along his length, while your other hand kept his head on your shoulder, where his lips were sucking a hickey.
“This is so good.” he grunted against your neck “But you gotta stop of I’ll cum before I can feel you.” he grabbed your hand from his cock and brought it to the side.
“Let’s keep those nice and open.” he made sure your legs were wide apart.
Ben slipped his hand south of your belly and ran his finger between your wet lips.
“You’re glistenin” he softly chuckled, before closing the distance between your bodies with a kiss. His finger rubbed gentle circles on your sensitive clit, until you were trembling for more.
He then put two fingers inside you, instantly curing them upwards, hitting the perfect spot right away.
“Fuck.” you moaned “right there…”
“Hmm.” he grinned widely, before abruptly removing his fingers and situating his cock on your entrance “Ready for me?”
“Yes. Yes!” you eagerly nodded.
Ben pushed all the way in, with one swift move, as you both grunted at the friction, you both were anticipating.
“Fuck. You’re tight.” Ben groaned.
“I think, you’re just too big.” You almost laughed “Fuck me, Sir!” you whined.
“As you wish baby.” he licked his lips and held your legs. Getting a more comfortable, position, he was able to thrust in and out of you with ease.
You were both a grunting, growling mess after a few mintues, you couldn’t take it any more.
“Shit, I’m gonna cum. Please Sir, let me come.” you begged.
“Because you asked so nicely and because you were such a good girl, you can come.” he spoke between each breath.
Ben leaned in closer and whispered in your ear “I want you come on my cock, and i want you to squeeze that tight pussy for me.”
It was all you needed to hear to let go. And you did come hard, with a screaming orgasm. Your body quivering, shaking from the overwhelming pleasure. Your cunt kept pulsating, even after the waves of hot and cold washed down.
“My turn.” Ben leaned in, extending his arm over your shoulder to keep himself above you, and cupped your chin with the other. He kissed you passionately while chasing his own orgasm until he released.
“Fuck.” he growled, as he kept thursting, passionately ramming in you, like the world was about to end.
“Fuck, fuck!” you cried out, as a second orgasm rushed in without warning. You squivered and shaked, while he was still kissing you.
After a few more moments he pulled away, as you both were trying to catch your breath.
“Oh my god.” you panted.
“You are amazing. Do you even know the pleasure you gave me?” Ben helped you get off the table.
“Not bad yourself.” you chuckled.
“Come here.” he pulled you in his lap. He brushed your hair behind your ear, as you sat across his thighs. Your arms wrapped around his neck, as you let your chin rest on his shoulder.
“Can we go to bed now?” you chuckled “I’m pretty drained.”
“Oh you definitely are staying with me tonight, and the coming nights as well.”
Ben held you in his arms and carried you to the bedroom. Placing like fine glass on the black satin sheets, he observed you.
“Whaat?” you felt shy.
“You are fantastic. My Fantasia.” Ben crawled over and cuddled you in his brace. “You did amazing today. And I don’t just mean the sex. I mean all of it.” he kissed your neck.
“I did?” you softly spoke.
“You were so brave during the mission. And it was your first job as a rightful member of my gang. ”
“Wait. I am in? As in…?” you turned around to look at his face, because you were pretty sure was joking.
“You earned your vote on the table.” he poked gently your nose. “And it wasn’t your sex skills that brought you the promotion.” he sarcastically stated.
“Hey.” you pouted your lips.
“Though it certainly helped.” he kissed your lips.
“Let’s sleep now. We got important things to take care of in the morning.” he snuggled you closer, which was all you needed to drift off to a well deserved sleep.
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A/n: Thank you so much for reading. I appreciate any kind of feedback, so please feel free to like, comment, reblog, as much as your heart desires.
Also, make sure you check out the posters for the fic in my blog.
