* ◟ : 〔 özge yağiz , cis-female + she/her 〕 damn ! is that ELIF CARTWRIGHT-UNDERGROVE ? last i heard they were making a name for themselves as a FENCER / ASSOCIATE for the ITALIAN MAFIA . i heard that the TWENTY - SEVEN year old is a bit VACUOUS but can also be CLEAR-HEADED . sometimes you can hear them humming FEEL BETTER by PENELOPE SCOTT , though people mostly associate them with MESSAGES LEFT ON READ , TRYING TO EXPRESS YOURSELF BUT NEVER FINDING THE RIGHT WORDS , A LIGHT THAT DOESN’T REACH AS FAR AS IT SHOULD .
𝒃𝒊𝒐𝒈𝒓𝒂𝒑𝒉𝒚 /// 𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒕𝒔 .
tl;dr. : adopted daughter of kaz cartwright and dorian undergrove --> felt kaz ‘drifting away’ because of the thing that happened in europe --> picked up fencing to distract herself but also found joy in it --> was qualified for the olympics but an accident caused by someone else ( but maybe it wasn’t an “accident” ) led to her suffering chronic pain --> however, she couldn’t abandon her dream and started to rely on substances --> of course, she was caught and was disqualified --> felt abandoned by everyone including herself, so she tried to fill that empty space by finding her biological family --> met someone who is related to her and kinda got dragged into the italian mafia due to them.
headcanons
- elif is more of the streetsmart than booksmart person. truth to be told, she is quite the opposite of boosmart and often will not get certain slangs/sayings/figure of speech/expressions ( probably when she was told about the wake, she seriously thought it was an event about someone waking up ... a conversation probably went like this elif “ so when are they finally waking up ? i want to go home” )
- she has no fashion sense at all or rather doesn’t care about clothes as long as they’re comfortable. she has different variations of the same shirt and pants.
- tba
wanted connections
general connections such as friends, enemies, people who don’t trust her, maybe someone who used to know her from her fencing days, someone she teaches some fencing, the person who caused the accident, anything
* ◟ : [ lucy liu, cis woman + she / her ] is that blanche song? last i heard the deputy chief counsel to the mayor for the government. i heard the fifty three year old is a bit tenacious but can also be volatile. sometimes you can hear them humming moon river by johnny crawford, though people mostly associate them with camera ready smiles, righteous fury and a desperate hold.
* ◟ : [ kento yamazaki, cis man + he / him ] is that atsuo yamazaki? last i heard they were making a name for themselves as a soldier + money collector for the japanese mafia. i heard the twenty eight year old is a bit apathetic but can also be engaging. sometimes you hear them humming sabotage by the beastie boys, though people usually associate them with heavy sunglasses, gucci loafers and sleeping on a pew.
⸻ 𝐁𝐋𝐀𝐍𝐂𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐎𝐍𝐆.
date of birth ( sun sign ). september 21st ( virgo )
sexuality. bisexual
goals. win the next mayoral election, finalize her divorce, clean the city’s streets
flaws. erratic, quick to anger, fiercely judgmental, on the squeamish side
summary. fresh off a bitter defeat in the general elections, blanche now finds herself working for the very mayor she was posed to defeat. believing the scandalous revelation of her marital problems was the root, blanche up-ended her life by filing for divorce and accepting a position within city hall. it’s a shame, really, as her campaign platform centered around cleaning the city’s streets — at least, pushing the terror the mafia families wage back to the shadows where it belongs — and now that war is on the cusp of exploding once again, blanche believes now is her time to shine.
wanted connections. personal assistant ( new hire, she fired the last. ). ex partner. former personal assistant ( !! connections to a mafia pls ). the ‘one who got away’ years ago ( any woman, 45+ ). flirtatious interest ( 45+ ). best friend / confidante. favorite neighbor. former classmates. suspicions. people she knows are associated with crime. blackmailers. childhood / college / old friends reuniting.
⸻ 𝐀𝐓𝐒𝐔𝐎 𝐘𝐀𝐌𝐀𝐙𝐀𝐊𝐈.
date of birth ( sun sign ). may 26th ( gemini )
sexuality. bisexual
goals. quit smoking, restore his honor, advance in the yamazaki family
flaws. attachment - prone, incredibly sensitive, performative + dramatic, indulgent
summary. back from a disastrous bend in japan, atsuo is trying not to carry the weight of failure that’s plagued him for the last few years. after fucking up an arms deal in osaka, atsuo’s returned to a demotion and the cruel judgment of his father’s family. he’s a failure, they tell him; a disaster within the ranks, and it’s only the grace of his namesake that he wasn’t dumped in the hudson. atsuo’s standing on shaky ground, however, and he’s in desperate need of allies. striving to clear his name and restore his reputation, atsuo’s willing to do whatever it takes to rise again.
wanted connections. former childhood friend but they fell out years ago ( enemies now ). a roommate. socialites in NYC / party friends. a combat trainer, preferred muscle to bring around. someone related to the fellow mafia member he semi - killed. an ex, tensions are still tight. best friend who’s loyalties lie with another family / outside crime. an enemy within the family ranks, a FBI agent he’s willing to trade information wish.
damn ! is that ANAÏS ARQUETTE ? last i heard they were making a name for themselves as a MEDICINAL CHEMIST for ROYALTY PHARMA, PLC. i heard that the THIRTY-NINE year old is a bit MOODY but can also be CHARMING . sometimes you can hear them humming LUCKY by BRITNEY SPEARS , though people mostly associate them with DELICATE YET BARELY LEGIBLE HANDWRITING, YVES SAINT LAURENT ‘LIBRE’ EAU DE PARFUM, A SPOT OF WARM SUNLIGHT .
BASICS.
FULL NAME: Anaïs Loren Arquette
AGE: 39 years old (August 12th)
PARENTS: Antoine Arquette + Josephine West
ORIENTATION: Bisexual
RELATIONSHIP STATUS: It’s complicated
CHILDREN: 1 boy, Dante
OCCUPATION: Medicinal Chemist @ Royalty Pharma
HOMETOWN: Paris, France
LIVES IN: New York City, New York
BIOGRAPHY. – infertility struggles tw, death tw
UN. Before Anaïs, the story began on a misty May morning in Versailles, France. Josephine West, an American ballerina, was overseas studying at The Paris Opera Ballet School. Her goal was to climb up the ranks and make her own name as a Danseur Étoile– until she met French diplomat, Antoine Arquette. He was known for his persuasive yet challenging personality amongst colleagues, and, Josie as well after their first date. She had been fiercely independent coming from humble beginnings in the Jersey Shore of New Jersey but her future husband was from a completely different world where butlers and drivers existed on call which Josie found hard getting used to. Josie stunned herself once she achieved the highest ranking after only 4 years at The Paris Opera Ballet School. She was even more surprised when Antoine proposed the day after she received her lifetime recognition.
DEUX. Antoine Arquette waited a decade for his wife, Josie, to be ready to build their family. They both were career-driven until Antoine began showing his impatience for Josie. Her independence was a bigger problem than expected, eventually persuading her to give up her career and stay at home. Weeks became months and after 3 years fertility struggles, the pair welcomed their 3 children at once via surrogacies. The Arquette family became a family of 5 over night, something Antoine was pleased with, where as Josie struggled with adapting.
TROIS. Anaïs was the youngest child out of the 3 siblings, getting the short end of the stick. Josie retreated emotionally from her children, wrestling with the concept of her new life. She was on her best behavior at the costs of her husband’s anger and judgment. Their agreement was crystal clear and the reaping of his luxury was something she committed to when she signed the prenuptial agreement to their marriage. Anaïs found it hard to connect to her mother during her childhood, even distancing herself from her siblings. The Arquette children were raised on performance, compliance and tension. All of the material items equated to nothing when it came to emotional fulfillment. The youngest Arquette had her life planned out before she was born which meant she was to live up to her mother and father’s reputations, at her parents demands.
QUATRE. When Anaïs was eighteen years old she withdrew from The Paris Opera Ballet School due to an ankle injury, halting her ballet career. During her recovery, Antoine Arquette was murdered during a business deal gone wrong with the Italian mafia. Suddenly, the Arquette’s golden reputation was smeared with the truth of what Antoine was conspiring in. Josie was left a widow, ultimately making the choice to move her family to her home country, The United States of America. Anaïs had mixed emotions but she knew this was a fresh start to her life.
CINQ. Soon after the Arquette’s arrived, Anaïs used her new found freedom to her advantage. While her every move was watched in France, America was a whole new ball park. She chose to attend college– despite her mother’s pleas to try to get back into the competitive world of ballet, begging her to strive for The Juilliard School. Anaïs received a bachelor’s degree in chemistry, continuing onto receiving a Ph. D. from Columbia University. She began as a research assistant at Columbia, growing her way up through corporate science roles. She is currently Senior Medicinal Chemist at Royalty Pharma, PLC.
EXTRA, EXTRA:
Anaïs was married to Domenico Carrizo, they have one child: Dante.
Anaïs has never gone back to France since her father’s death, still unwilling to decades later.
Anaïs bears no ill-will towards any mafia organizations believing everyone makes their own choices in their own right, despite what happened to her father.
Anaïs remains in contact with her family, especially now as Josie’s health deters.
Anaïs smokes, drinks, and participates in illegal business dealings, as long as you get her good side.
WANTED CONNECTIONS:
Best–friend: They could’ve met as children, her family traveled a lot between her fathers career and her balle or they could’ve met once she arrived in the States. This person would know Anaïs’ true emotions and judgments, would have to have thick skin and be able to deal with this menace. Anaïs is a good friend, she just has a mouth on her. She’ll spoil them rotten!
Rivals: She’s the most competitive person on this planet. She could find a competition in any arena of the world from ballet (previously), fitness class, work, academics, you name it.
Baby-sitter for her son: She shares custody with Dom but she’s a MILF and likes to have fun and relax. It’s a small gig but they’d come around often enough to know Anaïs’ preferences and schedule regarding her child.
Drug-dealer: She’s Walter White but better… you already know. Not many get full access but those who have been in the NYC area or if you play your cards right, she can help you get your hands on *substances.
official name : rosalía magdalene dolores kalili ( née hernández )
meaning of name : of latin origin meaning rose ; of latin origin meaning sorrows .
nicknames : rosa for close friends and family.
date of birth : june sixteenth .
age : fifty two .
birthplace : municipality of alcobendas, spain .
hometown : soho, new york city .
nationality : american - japanese citizenship .
gender : cis female .
pronouns : she/her .
orientation : openly fluid, unlabelled .
religion : raised roman catholic, not practising but still holds some beliefs .
languages : spanish ( first language ) , japanese , french , mandarin and teaching herself russian ( has picked up some sayings from a mostly russian mother’s group she used to attend, but doesn’t quite understand the meaning of them )
inspired by : wanda maximoff ( marvel ), mrs smith ( mr & mrs smith ), shiv roy ( succession ), the countess ( ahs ), back to black ( amy winehouse album ) .
mbti : entp .
main vice : envy .
main virtue : charity .
family :
sofia hernández ( mother, housewife, deceased )
javier hernández ( father, ‘‘businessman’’, deceased )
older brothers ( three, siblings, unknown )
crimes : none that she’s been convicted for, she’s a saint !
mental health : ptsd and grief, however she’s currently in therapy to process.
physical health : healthy and often goes to the gym.
height : five foot , six inches .
scarring : a small scar on her right collarbone she got as a child .
noticeable features : perfectly manicured nails, rouge lined lips + a small heart outline tattoo on left outer wrist and her irezumi ( to be decided ) on outer right thigh.
01. there are no good people in this world. mama reminds you every morning as you help with the chores, carry the washing load back inside while your brothers follow papa down the driveway into town. a fabricated nuclear family; observant eyes watch men enter and leave your home during late afternoons. family friends, papa explains, but you know better. pack your things and leave at eighteen, you aren’t named after a saint for no reason.
02. new york is a jungle of opportunities, adrenaline rushes through your veins as you step down on the tarmac. the nineties are just arriving and so do you, a chance to transform into the woman you want to be. immediately head off to columbia and begin a degree in law ⸻ there may be no good people, but you plan to prove otherwise. it’s at one of columbia’s student parties where you meet your future first husband.
03. you value honesty above anything else, blurt it out with wine stained blush. your heart swells when he agrees. an aspiring boxer and upcoming lawyer, married at the courthouse at twenty. wedding dress exactly like the telenovelas that imprint on childhood. you both move into a cheap apartment in flushing, it’s not much but already imagination spirals into what could be.
04. he never specifies what kind of boxer he is. coming home late at night, rarely allowing you to see his fights ( don’t you want your biggest fan there ? you ask, i’d rather keep life and work separate, keep you safe. ) but you know better, instinct tells you. the ring he boxes at owned by the likes of the yakuza ⸻ their prized fighter who helped manipulate the game in their favour.
05. one final game, he promises, and he wants you to wait by the back alley for him. you agree, standing by the back door freezing even with his leather jacket on. the door slams open, a bloody hand takes you by the wrist as he tells you to run. questions left unanswered, a duffel bag full of money in his other hand with the name stitched on the side. suddenly you stop, the sound of a loud bang ringing in your ears as his weight pulls you down to the ground. three years, gone in a shot.
06. life now begins as a widow, condolences from the yakuza as she promises to see them again. return each night furious as loneliness greets you at the door. learn and study the name kristiansen, grief is nothing but fuel for the wrath that bites at you. learn to discover that your first husband had an offer from the kristiansen, fall during the match and be paid enough to take the both of you to the height of luxury. he took it, stealing the money and keeping his loyalty to the yakuza. always ambitious, yet never the one to think far ahead. st beg every night for a chance to come by, any opportunity to avenge your husband. the universe listens, in the figure of kellan kalili.
07. how quickly you two understand each other; feel the same purpose as one another. it’s your idea to move to tokyo, uphold the promise to the yakuza you made at twenty three. the fire never leaves your eyes, but suddenly hope glistens instead. start building the family you always wanted for yourself ⸻ live a life as a criminal defence lawyer, while keeping loyalty to both your family and the mafia. time flies quicker than you’d imagine as you find yourself back in new york.
08. there are no good people in the world, that’s for sure. but you discover there isn’t entirely bad people either. new york comes in vibrant shades of grey, with the pops of kristiansen red sink to the gutters. you’re a mother, one hell of a lawyer and associate to the mafia. unexpected, but you couldn’t be more content.
* ◟ : 〔 rosamund pike , cis female + she / her 〕 damn ! is that FRANCESCA “FRANKIE" AGARD ? last i heard they were making a name for themselves as a MANAGING PARTNER / LAWYER FOR AGARD , DELOACHE , MCGILLIS . i heard that the FORTY - ONE year old is a bit MERCILESS but can also be FAIR . sometimes you can hear them humming DÉMONS by ANGÈLE & DAMSO , though people mostly associate them with A COMMANDING PRESENCE , IMPECCABLE STYLE , UNBREAKABLE WINNING STREAK .
BASICS
Name: Francesca Agard
Nicknames/Alias: Frankie
Face Claim: Rosamund Pike
Age: 41
Gender: Cis-female
Sexuality: Heterosexual
P.O.B: London, United Kingdom
D.O.B: March 22nd, 1981
Current Residence: Upper East Side, Manhattan, NYC
Occupation: Managing Partner at Agard, Deloache, Mcgillis
Language: English, French, Italian, German, Dutch, Mandarin
Fields of Law: Corporate & Securities Law, Sports and Entertainment Law, Tax Law, International Law
FAMILY
Father: Lord Damian Agard, 8th Earl of Leicester
Father's Occupation: Diplomat
Mother: Lady Fiona Agard, Countess of Leicester
Mother's Occupation: Socialite
Sibling(s): Older Brother (45), Older Brother (43)
OCCUPATION
Name: Agard, Deloache, McGillis
Address: 375 Park Ave, New York, NY 10022, USA
Position: Managing Partner
Specialization(s): Corporate & Securities Law, Tax Law, Intellectual Property Law, International Law
Notable Client(s): Max Verstappen (Formula One), Amar'e Stoudemire (NBA), Singapore Airlines (outside counsel, Airlines), Izabel Goulart (model), Luann de Lesseps (TV personality)
PLOTLINES (click on a plotline for a more in-depth take - wip)
Frankie is a diplomat's daughter. She moved around quite a lot as a kid and that made her a polyglot. She's lived in Singapore, Hong Kong, The Netherlands, and Paris.
Frankie moved to Washington D.C after graduating from Sorbonne when her father was appointed British Ambassador to the United States. Frankie saw an opportunity to attend the world's most prestigious law school and decided to tag along
Frankie attended Harvard Law School and graduated magna cum laude, obtaining her J.D degree. Years later, she went to Yale and obtained an L.L.M degree.
Frankie is a lawyer. Practicing law had always been her goal in life. The reason behind this is that Frankie believes that being a lawyer means having power and Frankie is driven by power. She believes that lawyers always have the upper hand despite the challenges that come with the job. Frankie loves the fight and she loves winning those fights even more.
Frankie clerked for 2 judges. First, at The United States Court of Appeals for the Second Circuit and then for the Honorable Ruth Bader Ginsburg at The United States Supreme Court.
Frankie worked at prestigious law firms in New York like Skadden and made partner at Wachtell, Lipton, Rosen & Katz before leaving and starting her own firm with two other partners
Frankie practices law in many fields, but her specialties are in Corporate & Securities Law, Sports and Entertainment Law, Tax Law, and International Law.
Despite having lived in the US for so long, Frankie maintained her Received Pronunciation British accent and British values.
Frankie is an ambivert but leans more towards introversion. She's been told to have no empathy and is cold as ice. Even her smile feels cold and insincere. She has been described as unfriendly and unapproachable, but she is cordial.
Frankie values loyalty more than anything. Earning her loyalty is difficult, but when she gives it to you, it knows no bound. However, if you break said loyalty, you may not be able to earn it back ever. No second chances.
Frankie has a dark side. She's killed someone in the past and removed any evidence. She didn't regret it and if she had to do it again, she would.
MOST-WANTED CONNECTIONS
Deloache: Frankie's friend and fellow name partner at Agard, Deloache, McGillis. The two met and became friends during their tenure at Wachtell, Lipton, Rosen & Katz.
McGillis: Frankie's friend and fellow name partner at Agard, Deloache, McGillis. Frankie met McGillis at Yale when she was pursuing her L.L.M.
Associate: Someone she trusts and works closely together
Lawyers at Agard, Deloache, McGillis: any lawyers! Agard, Deloache, McGillis is New York's number 1 law firm in New York. People are dying to work there, but only the best of the best from Ivy League Schools can get in.
Clients
People at the District Attorney's Office: Frankie's very famous in New York, most well-known for her winning streak. She needs an opponent who can match her skills and abilities. She made quite a name for herself during her time at the DA's office.
Disclaimer!!
This Character is written by Gerri for crimeshq and is based on these fictional characters: Harvey Specter, Samantha Wheeler, Jessica Pearson, Diane Lockhart, Olivia Pope, Blair Waldorf, Amy Elliot Dunne, Marla Grayson, Victoria Vinciguerra.
* ◟ : 〔 çağla demir , cis-female + she/her 〕 damn ! is that ILAYDA SEREN ? last i heard they were making a name for themselves as a SOLDIER / FORGER for the IRISH MAFIA . i heard that the TWENTY-NINE year old is a bit ELUSIVE but can also be ALERT . sometimes you can hear them humming BONES by IMAGINE DRAGONS , though people mostly associate them with STICKS SNAPPING UNDER YOUR BOOTS AS YOU WALK THROUGH THE FOREST , WHISKEY AND BOURBON AND WHISPERING A CONFESSION TO AN EMPTY ROOM , THE TENDER VOICE OF MANIPULATION .
. 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐩𝐢𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧
azula ( atla ), kaz brekker ( six of crows ), nathan prescott ( life is strange ), mary crawley ( downton abbey ), hyun sooah ( my id is gangnam beauty ), petra solano ( jane the virgin ), osamu dazai ( bsd )
. 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐬
name. ilayda seren
age. twenty-nine
gender/pronouns. cis-female, she/her
ethnicity + nationality. turkish
languages. english, turkish, german
family. mother ( özge sarıgül ) father ( koray seren, absent ) , merve seren ( sister )
position. forger and soldier for the irish mafia
. 𝐛𝐢𝐨𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐩𝐡𝐲
i. 19930606 izmir, turkey. with her father’s name always accompanied by strange silence , it’s her mother borrowing both roles, struggling to make ends meet, as her presence is only remembered by her sunken eyes, exhaustion carving deep lines into her face.
ii. ilayda doesn’t blame her, she never had, even back then. her mother is doing her best. she tries to help her out as much as she can. during the day, already pretending to be an adult, helping out her mother as much as she can. she can read her mother’s expression, almost seeing through her, guilt tugging at her heart and yet she tells her she’s fine. being a child is boring anyway.
iii. yet, she’d watch the other children her age, a half-covered face peeking through the dirty window, remorse squeezing her heart as she’d catch herself wishing to change lives just for one day. but instead, it’s only at night, when her mother’s eyes would shut from exhaustion, her little sister asleep in their shared room, ilayda would allow herself to be the child she was. she’s sneaking out at night, meeting the only friend that hadn’t deemed her a ‘weirdo’ like everyone else. pretending that the night was endless, wishting that tomorrow wouldn’t come.
iv. however, her escape from reality, has never been a safe space; and she’d learn about it that one day. they want to hurt her and no matter how much she’s struggling, no matter how much she pretends she’s an adult, a lie couldn’t protect her. she was just a weak child.
v. fortunately, someone finds her and helps her out. the stranger doesn’t say much but for ilayda he’s a hero. and he’d become the father, whose name wouldn’t be accompanied by a strange silence.
vi. at first he’s annoyed with her. a strange kid following him wherever he goes. he gives it some time, but ilayda would become even more determined with every passing day. in the end, he agrees to help her out, teaching her how to protect herself. and making her promise that she’d leave him alone when he’s taught her everything he knew.
vii. her promise was a lie indeed. and he somehow ( involuntarily) has accepted the role of being the father of a child as stubborn as her. even when ilayda finds out about his Involvement with the irish mafia, she doesn’t seem to be fazed by it. in fact, in the end she ends up following him to new york, working alongside with him.
viii. however, this story doesn’t have a happy ending ( or at least the most proximate definition to a happy ending one in this world can have. ). and she ends up, witnessing the fall of the person who was like a father to her. she’s furious, not only at the person who killed him but at the organization she believed would protect him. she believes she needs to take revenge. not only on the person who murdered him but on the whole system. pretending to be on their side, planning to take them down from within.
. 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐲
her smile is sickly sweet, any feigned sincerity tainted by cruelty. yet, she pretends to care, knowing how to curve her lips, and pitch her voice that one would think that it is real. she’ll sugarcoat if she needs to, wrapping cruel words in the disguise of naivete. her actions are only controlled by purpose, her intentions rarely good
. 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬
- the person responsible for her father figure’s death, her sibling (wc i also need to send to the main lol), people who think of her as a friend but she only uses them, on the flipside people she only approached because she wanted to use them but she finds herself caring for them, people (in the irish mafia) who might suspect her, people whom she secretly works with because she believes they’d serve some purpose, someone who might start out really liking her ( can also be romantic for drama ) but slowly starts to see the cracks in her fake persona, someone she tried to ... kill ( lol ) exes, enemies to lovers, enemies etc. ( ANYTHING REALLY !!! )
official name : cassius edward cartwright.
meaning of name : of latin origin meaning hollow ; of english origin meaning protector .
nicknames : only goes by kaz or cartwright ( see previously: blondie, pretty boy, baby face, john wayne, etc ) .
date of birth : december twenty three .
age : fifty .
birthplace : st louis, missouri .
hometown : queens, new york city .
nationality : american - european citizenship .
gender : cis man .
pronouns : he/him .
orientation : bisexual & biromantic .
religion : fully believes in superstitions .
languages : english , knows spanish, french and high school mandarin .
inspired by : aaron hotchner ( criminal minds ), othello ( shakespeare ), bucky barnes ( marvel ), fox mulder ( the x - files ), hopper ( stranger things ) .
mbti : infj .
main vice : wrath .
main virtue : diligence .
crimes : file sealed at eighteen, classified ( believed to be likes of auto theft, misdemeanour, assault - but can neither confirm nor deny )
mental health : depressive episodes, ptsd, addiction ( alcoholic, functioning )
physical health : athletic and fbi expected, suffers from muscle pain in abdomen area
height : five foot , eleven inches .
scarring : healed gunshot wound ( right abdomen ) .
noticeable features : patchwork of traditional black and white tattoos on his chest ( often hidden ), healed broken nose.
01. leave missouri the day of your graduation in the passenger seat of some random’s pick up truck. shed the skin of the kid who grew up in the shitty trailer park lot; unable to bear the disappointment his mother shows when he sees him, a striking resemblance to his father. seal the records of who you once were, not that there was much to begin with ( st. louis was never known for their upstanding, protocol following, officers ) and head to new york with the aspirations to become something.
02. the need to prove yourself settles in your bones. fight the overwhelming urge with tattoos and cheap bear, it seemed logical at the time. crash a job expo and wander the isles, finding the nypd stand in the corner with other youthful souls eager to apply. he’s noticed through the crowd, stunned by the recognition. is this what god intended all along ? you never been religious, but you follow signs and apply for the entrance exams.
03. your twenties are something that’s treasured, cherished by a wardog like you. you meet your partner after shortly becoming a special agent for the fbi. hold a shotgun wedding between a small group of friends ( you can only imagine the horror on your mother’s face, proclaiming she never raised you to be so haste. you’d disagree. ) and a few years after that, bring a child into the world. how you grow up so quickly, yet still feel like a child.
04. meet your new partner. the last in the division who is indifferent to having someone so baby faced. they’ve heard the rumours; blondie thinks he’s some of john wayne, cocky lil shit. how with charms and determination, he’d pass the exams and test, despite the sealed record and riding on the coattails of his father ( the only thing he contributed, really ). so he shows you the ropes of the job, drags you along to every crime scene and how ignore to the snickers of others. he’s the first to show you any hope, a smidge of understanding. in return, he’s the first authority figure you respect.
05. you wake up in the chilly mornings of christmas day back in new york. pain erupting from your abdomen as soon as those baby blues readjust to the light, partner and toddler waiting by the side of the hospital bed. you struggle to remember what happened, where’s your partner ? no one can give you a straight answer. then comes the feeling of blood seeping on the skins of your hands, the echo of gunshots, handcuffs locking into place over the target’s wrists. five years of undercover in europe, gone. “ he died instantly, we couldn’t do much. i’m so sorry. ”
06. there’s nothing but anger for the world, for those who run underneath the shadows. while promoted to unit chief, taking the role in replacement of him ( the way you stare at your reflection, hating yourself. it should’ve been him ) short of your fortieth birthday and his funeral. death doesn’t cause reason for stop, but it creates reason for self destruction. the marriage quickly falls, suddenly your kid is graduating, and office is now a place you call home.
07. no longer recognise the buckshot, wild, cocky lil’ shit that started the job all those years ago. the tattoos that remain on your body no longer feel like they belong, a remnant of what you had so long ago. you learn emotions get people hurt, keep a safe distance between you and the agents in hopes they get to go home, safe, each night. stay in your office, a cigarette in one hand and a glass of whiskey in the other, broken promises to quit both. worry still etched between knitted eyebrows. at least some habits die harder than others.
OCCUPATION: mortician + organ harvester for the latinx mafia
GENDER: cis woman . she/her
ROMANTIC ORIENTATION: ?
SEXUAL ORIENTATION: bisexual inclinations
tw: serial killing , gaslighting , gore , child death , parental death , guns , violence .
I. STRAWBERRIES & CREAM, ropes & scraped knees. high pigtails & princess dresses, all stars used to shine for you but now the stars have fallen and your big brown eyes see the world as a warped mirage of what it really is: something hollow, and emptied of fairytales . maybe you’re broken. you long for the days where you used to run into the house with dirty shoes to leave your tiny imprints in mud, when your small hands would reach for the skies covered in dirt & grime, but those sunny summer days are long gone, but oh, how fondly do you remember them, how sweetly do you remember of days that never were.
II. DROPLETS OF COLD WATER pepper your skin while your run around the garden, daddy takes time off work to play, he’s chasing you & mommy’s smiling from the window, thanking god for such a happy family. you used to have a house, it was big and tall and white with a big red door that welcomed you home every day. now it’s black and moldy and decrepit, full ash and fragmented memories of faces burnt in a fire. was it ever happy? think hard on it . think really really hard . scrape away the made-up stories , the good memories you’ve made for yourself and look back --- was your mother really smiling or was she crying? that was never your home . your home was a place filled with anguish and terror , it was a chamber of horrors made to muffle screams of children who didn’t know any better .
III. YOU REMEMBER SCREAMS, it was all fine and then it wasn’t. you remember how mommy fell down … or maybe — you weren't supposed to pry, you were SUPPOSED to be a good girl and stay out of daddy’s basement. but you were never a good little girl, you always found a way to misbehave and that’s why you could never be one of them : one of his perfect little dolls . they stayed down there , in the dark , along , unmoving : their eyes hollowed out , their limbs limp . they scared you . he scared you --- but you promised to never tell anyone . no, you don’t remember the creaking steps of old wooden stairs, mommy never got hurt. it never happened. you’re just imagining these things, you’ve always been such an imaginative young girl.
IV. SCISSORS DRIPPING CRIMSON on the old concrete floor, he’d made a mess again , and those cold black eyes shoot daggers at you. he makes you promise not to tell. he was never SCARY before, was he? why was he so mad? was that a body at his feet? was that your mother at his feet? she digged a little too deep . she found things she shouldn’t and now she had to go --- he couldn’t trust anybody but you . tears rolled down flustered cheeks as bloodied hands pulled your small shoulders in, cradling your tiny body in its stifling embrace. you don’t remember stabbing him, you only remember the knife went in and out of his body and he collapsed . he smiled at you , and told you ‘that’s my girl’ . he didn’t get back up again . you stayed there for two days, with your parents, hoping they’d somehow get up and fix everything. they never did.
V. THEY THOUGHT YOU WERE DEAD AT FIRST when the cops broke in , shouting and flashing lights . you were cold and curled up into a little ball in the corner, but you were breathing . you said the children who went down there never came up , and now mommy wasn’t coming up either . what they found down there in that room of horrors would forever brand him THE DOLLMAKER , and you the dollmaker’s daughter . his girl . you watched the world crumble as a cop kneeled down at your feet and told you everything was going to be okay . the fbi was kind to you --- but there was no kindness that could erase everything you went through. still, you’ve always held a soft spot for them.
VI. YOU ENDED UP AT AN ORPHANAGE , the bad kind.; where the food tasted like muck , and there were lipstick stains on plastic cups & crushed cigarettes butts all over the overgrown grass. the other kids didn’t take a liking to you . you’re pushed around - but you never pushed back. once a week she’d come visit : long blonde hair & crooked glasses . she always sounded so sweet , like a hummingbird . you loved how colorful the crayons were, but even they couldn’t get you to speak . you went through several families, but eventually they all gave up on you ---- in some ways, you gave up on them too. you ran away at sixteen, and did whatever you had to do to survive in the streets of new york city. sometimes, people sent you things : unkind letters, money. you never changed your name, because part of you knew that’d never be enough to forget .
VII. YOU START DANCING when you turn eighteen, you’re beautiful and despite your ugly past ---- nobody cares about that in this place . they all just want to forget: their lives, their sorrows, their own mistakes. that’s how you first come to known the latix mafia, a man takes interest in you, says he’d in love --- head over hills, he’s never met anyone like you before . he pays for your education , and death pulls you in like gravity --- you feel compelled to be a mortician . nobody understands why such a pretty girl would choose to spend all her time with corpses , but you know ---- they’re more like you than any of the living .
VIII. WHEN THEY ASK YOU TO DO A FEW FAVORS , to turn into the monster you’d been running from , you can’t say no . you know it’s not right , and the more you embrace this role of harvester , the less like yourself you feel , but you’re indebited to them --- to the mafia . you owe them . you’ll owe them forever . and who else would have you ? who else would have anyone with this sort of stain working for them?
