angtspril day 24
prompt: Goodbyes
follow up to day 6′s Wandavision au
ao3
Once the battle is over and the carnage, for the most part, cleaned aside, Padme finds him by the steps of their home.
Luke and Leia are inside. They're still practically bouncing off the walls; playing the hero had been dangerous and scary for them, yes, but now they're just working through the adrenaline rush the fight had left them with.
"You're going to have to get rid of all of this," Padme says, her eyes roving over the picturesque city of Theed, now deserted of its inhabitants, "aren't you."
He nods mutely. He doesn't trust his voice.
"What'll happen to it all?" she asks. He looks up; she's leaning on the side of the door frame, arms crossed, gaze far away. The sunset's rays give her a practically ethereal glow.
"It'll go back to the way it was before," he finally says. "Everything else—everyone else that wasn't here before will vanish."
"Including me," Padme murmurs. "And Luke. And Leia."
"Yes."
He has to do it, he knows. It's already started; at the borders of the city, the force-induced haze is already lifting. Now he's just here, numb with the anticipation.
He looks up at Padme. He's weak, he knows. If Padme opens her mouth and begs him right there to stop it, to keep the false reality running, to keep her and the children alive and happy—he'd do it. He'd do anything she asked.
But she doesn't. And he doesn't.
"I don't want to die," she says softly. "But my life, for all of theirs—that's not a fair trade."
Yes. They both know that, by now. Besides, this reality was built on panic and loneliness and desperation. It was never built to last.
"And she—" Padme's breath hitches. "The old Padme. Me before all of this. She wouldn't have wanted this either, would she?"
Anakin takes a shuddering breath. "No," he agrees. "she wouldn't."
Suddenly panic grips his heart like a vise. "Luke—and Leia—" They'll be gone. Their children—they'll be dead.
"They were happy," Padme says, voice breaking. "with us. That's all we can ask."
She sits down next to him and laces their fingers together. Part of him relaxes into the contact; another, smaller part of him holds back a flinch at the fact that it'll soon be gone. As if it never existed. Padme clears her throat. "Will you," she starts carefully, "will you tell my family for me? That I love them very much. And I'm sorry."
"I don't know if they'd want to hear anything from me," he says. Jobal, Ruwee, and Sola had been. . . positively lovely, the first time they'd met, back when he was assigned to guard Padme for the first time. But now. . . "If we'd never been together, Palpatine would have never targeted you. You'd never have been killed."
"Not true," she says firmly. "They know me well. I probably would have gotten involved in the Delegation of 2000 anyways, and Palpatine would have been loath to let me live, lest I set a bad example for the rest of Naboo."
"I'll tell them," he promises, not quite sure he believes her. He'll make sure they hear her words, even if he has to get past slammed doors and roiling anger.
The haze is lifting now. Padme looks. . . slightly more faded.
"Goodbye, Anakin," Padme says. Her face is wet but she's trying to smile all the same. She's afraid, he knows, of what comes next. He'd be afraid too, if he was in her place. About to face his death, to be wiped from the galaxy as if he's never even existed.
"It won't hurt," he promises. "Don't be afraid. It'll be as if we're falling asleep."
She meets his eyes. "I'm not afraid."
I'm not afraid to die.
Padme Amidala vanishes with the rest of Theed.
