hotstuffcortez replied to your post “if a fan wants a totally ~drama-free utopia~ of a fandom, alright...”
I think something people need to keep in mind is that, while critical analysis of the content is important, especially in terms of social issues, the constant barrage of negativity and discourse is suffocating. Like you said, it's okay to say that the fandom should focus on positives more because negativity can be really draining. It burnt me out and contributed to a really shitty mental health episode. We need to recognize the difference between "your discussion of racism and homophobia is toxic and ruining my experience" and "I don't have the willpower or mental wellness to get involved in that discussion and I would like to have more positive content available so I can still participate in the ways I am able with my current mental and physical wellbeing" (Which is all stuff you've kinda touched on already, but I just wanted to share my take)
Replying in general, not just to you (though I do mention what you say in 1)
Lately there are three main problems for me:
1. Fans can't recognize that what is true for them isn't true for others. If they believe that discussions are bad, it means that All Discussions Are Bad And To Be Avoided By The Entire Fandom. But that's just not the case. Not all discussions are bad, negative, toxic, etc. Some can be, but then if you feel it's too much for you you take a step back. Which you did, you recognized that it was bad for your mental health and you went on a hiatus... But what you didn't do is ask people to stop discussions altogether. You knew the difference between your own experience and the fandom in general.
2. Fans believe there is only One Good Way To Do Fandom. Again, it's not true. I've been here having discussions for almost four years and you know, I think the situation is a lot worse than it used to be. Now people believe discussions are bad, that even *reacting to stuff* is bad, that if you do that you're looking for drama. I've been accused of that by new fans to the point that I had to justify what I do, and boy did that bug me. Just because I was critical, because I was enjoying discussions, because I see things and I react, it meant "bad person in the fandom who is looking for trouble." There are people legit scared of me for that. I don't know how to reassure them at all, but they truly believe I'm some kind of fandom villain for doing what I do. And then you know, what do people do when they believe discussion is bad, when suddenly it's impossible to talk to each other? They create confessions. They go on anon, they say the most awful shit ever, and they believe it's all okay because it's all contained. I see this as something FAR MORE toxic than trying to create a safe environment where we can all talk and learn from each other without saying awful shit anon.
3. The fact that people believe that to be a True Fan you cannot be negative or critical is the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard. And that there is a hollier-than-thou attitude, like "I'm better than you because I'm not critical" is just insulting. If you're a fan who is positive all the time, of course it's something I can admire. But people aren't better people or better fans because they're not critical. And to imply that I have to be more of a fan, like that post said "put the fan back in fandom" is just the fucking worst. Here is what I do as a critical fan: -Enjoy the hell out of the games -Have discussions that I think are constructive and make me see the good and bad of the content I enjoy -Listen to other fans and communities when they speak out about things that bother them -Try to see how as a fan how I can contribute to make the content I enjoy better and more representative of everyone -Create fandom projects that I think can be really helpful to fandom as a whole -Organize fandom events to celebrate characters, pairings, etc -Give resources to the fandom like transcripts and lore analysis So they're telling people like *me* to put the fan back in fandom? Are they for real???? Well thanks lol Love the condescending and shitty attitude.
See, I had a discussion with someone who called this whole thing about being a better fan a form of gatekeeping and I agree. I also think it's dangerous to influence young fans and new people with ideas like "you can't be critical if you want to be a part of the fandom." It's false and juvenile and the reason why I spend so much time having to defend myself for simply doing what I do as a fan and say "hey no, actually I'm not toxic!!! I'm not always looking for drama!!! I just want to have nice discussions holy shit." So basically those people can really ruin fandom experience for a lot of us while claiming that *we* are ruining shit. But I don’t go around telling them what to do and I don’t tell them they’re lesser fans. I respect them as fans. Maybe they should rethink their definition of the word, you know?
We also need to realize because of everything I said in point 2 that we're having a lot of negative feelings about conversations because we changed the nature of them and the context around them. Shitty people created a tense environment where any kind of discussion led to being ostracized, bullied or my favorite, spread lies about. That sort of bad attitude influences everyone because now everyone is scared. But two or three years ago we had a lot of discussions about so many things and it was not negative, it was just nice. It's all gone now.
