May 12, 2018
“ do me a favor, kiss my ass. ”
“I’d rather eat it. Can I do that instead?”
seen from China
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“ do me a favor, kiss my ass. ”
“I’d rather eat it. Can I do that instead?”
adifferentkindofson replied to your post : the only thing that could have made louis’ tweets... no but imagine if he actually challenged him to a pick up game on a pitch somewhere in london someone write a fic pls
Louis throws his phone down onto a couch, seething. Not even the green of the phone case, a reflection of Harry’s eyes, can calm him down.
“What happened, Lou?” Harry asks, moving to pat him on the back.
“Naughty Boy happened. His time is done.” Louis is seeing red.
No, he is literally seeing red. It’s the colour of Harry’s shirt and Harry is hugging him, now. His face is buried against Harry’s shoulder. Harry smells like vanilla and amber and a bit of sex.
“You can’t like— you can’t kill him!”
Louis scoffs and pulls away.
“I’ll kill him… on the pitch.” His voice is sinister. If this were Hogwarts he’s pretty sure he’d have turned Naughty Boy into a beetle by the end of his first transfiguration lesson.
He moves to take his dig his phone out from where it has slipped between two cushions, typing out a message in a frenzied fury.
You listen here u stupid fuck… if you think u can come at us and at our fans like this you have another thing coming pal… If you think you’re so great why don’t you meet me on the pitch. Emirates. Let’s do this like gentlemen. Show up or I’ll crush you with stacks of my money before you can run your big mouth.
He sends the message and waits. Harry is gonna give him so many blowjobs for this.
Two weeks later Louis crushes Naughty Boy on the pitch and then Daisy shows up and kicks Naughty Boy in the shins and Naughty Boy is so humiliated he vanishes and never works again THE END
Oh and PS. Jerry the Lamp Man is in the stands holding a light up lamp sign for Louis, obvs.
auburnlilacs replied to your post “How eggs-cruciating. ”
/SHOVES ASPIRIN DOWN UR THROAT bc u didnt want rosie's eggcentric dinnah >:c
HUSH, POND.