Something just like this Pt. 3 (End) - Jungkook x F. Reader
Summary: In the middle of adjusting your life to being a divorcee with a daughter, you are invited to your middle school reunion. There, you meet your ex-boyfriend, Jungkook, who also has his own struggle. Feeling nostalgic, both of you are involved in a journey of walking down memory lane. Between puppy love and friendship, will romance bloom for a second time?
Word count: 9k
Warnings: just a touch of angsty feeling but nothing dramatic :)
Smut Warnings: kissing, makeout, fingering, unprotected sex (lets be wiser and use protection guys), missionary, cowgirl, he comes in her throat, cum swallowing, tell me if im missing something :(
Genre: Angst, Fluff, Smut in this chapter
Read part 1 here, part 2 here
Author's Note: I don't know where to begin but to say sorry because it took me a whole 9 months to write this last chapter. Honestly the first half was done right away 9 months ago, but somehow lost my inspiration as I was trying to write the second half. But it's weird how one day I felt so inspired and missing writing this back, and then the rest just written in a few days. But I feel relieved that I could finally finish this. Hopefully you would enjoy it. Thank you!
Again, thank you so so much to @euphorajeon who beta-ed this chapter too, would have been a big mess without you missy :*
Taglist: @aznstoner, @lovingkoalaface, @tatzzz-25, @sanarin, @agirlmadeofsteel, @mar-lo-pap, @aiiselle90210, @annyeongbitch7, @roseda, @annpeachy, @jjkluver7, @lj-lovebangtan, @j0cgr0c, @jenc09, @joonam @jeeykey @rinintan9395 @jungkookie-7
On Friday morning you received a message from Seonho saying he needs to come to the office half day on Saturday, so he can only pick up Miyeon after 3PM. Even though Jungkook promised to pick you up at 6.30 in the evening, you just thought it’s easier if you bought the groceries needed to make jjajangmyeon–the dish you finally decided to make–later today after work in order not to rush yourself tomorrow.
By 5.30 PM you’ve reached the grocery store not far from your office. You do need to take the subway back home later, but the quality of meat and vegetables in that store is way better than the ones near your home.
You are in the middle of picking up a bag of cucumber when someone taps on your shoulder lightly.
“Y/N?”
“Oh? Taehyung??”
“In the flesh,” he gives you a salute gesture that makes you chuckle.
“Nice to see you here, grocery shopping?”
“Great to see you too. Yep, just picking up some ingredients for jjajangmyeon,” you peer over his shopping cart and see many bottles of isotonic and mineral water, “great effort to maintain hydration there.”
He laughs and shows his cart proudly, “it’s for the guys, we’re playing soccer against the Engineering Department tonight, please send your prayer for us, we need all the support there is.”
“Ooff, Engineering Department guys sound legit.”
“They are, hopefully our Jungkookie can save the day, he’s the best striker we have had since forever.”
“Oh, Jungkook’s playing?”
“Yeah, speaking of Jungkook though, did he… uh,” Taehyung scratches the back of his head,, “did he say anything to you?”
You’re a little bit confused, because Jungkook did say a lot of things within the span of time after you met Taehyung.
“I’m sorry… about what?”
Taehyung can guess that Jungkook must have not said anything to you from your puzzled expression. He also hasn’t had the time to ask Jungkook directly, and was planning to follow up to his junior after the soccer game later tonight.
“Uh, well,” Taehyung decides to just take his shot, “I asked Jungkook for your number, but he said he wanted to ask you first, which I understood, because I wouldn’t want my friends to give around my number just to anyone.”
“Oh…”
“Yeah, so…”
“Must have slipped his mind or something, uhm, let me put it in your phone?” you offer, because there’s no reason you can find to turn down Taehyung’s advances. It’s not like you have to consider someone else’s feelings… or should you? Because you don’t think Jungkook is the type of person who easily forgets this kind of thing.
Is it your wishful thinking though?
“Thanks!” Taehyung says when you return his phone back, “maybe I can take you out to one of the places I told you some time?”
You just nod tentatively, “aren’t those kid friendly places?”
“Yeah, I mean I don’t mind taking you and your daughter out if it’s too troublesome for you to find someone to look after her. We can make it a family-friendly date,” he answers with a boyish grin, which somehow does not make his face less handsome.
This is something you should be excited about. An attractive man offering to take you out on a date and clearly very considerate because he even let your kid tag along if you couldn’t find a sitter.
But all you can think about as you nod politely again is whether there is a possibility that Jungkook is gatekeeping you on purpose.
“So… I’ll see you around, Y/N?”
“Yeah, see you,” and as Taehyung turns his way, you call out to him again, “hey Tae, good luck on the game and… tell Jungkook I said hi?”
Somehow there’s a difference in the way Taehyung smiles at you. As if he’s acknowledging something while giving you a salute before walking in the opposite direction.
But the worry doesn’t stay too long on your mind. You need to finish up shopping because on weekdays you always try to get home as soon as you can, considering Miyeon is waiting for you at home.
Just as you found a seat inside the subway, a new message pops up on your phone screen.
[Jungkook]: checking whether you still have my number saved, because Tae just told me you said hi
[Jungkook]: hi to you too
[Jungkook]: (pic)
A smile blooms on your face, because not only is he cute, but why does he need to send a picture of himself visibly sweating, probably after a round of soccer.
[You]: well I accidentally bumped into him at the supermarket and he said you guys are playing soccer tonight, I just did what’s customary ;p
[You]: So did you guys defend yourself against the engineering guys?
[Jungkook]: barely. Will you still be cooking with me if we lose?
[You]: of course, consider it as a consolidation meal
[Jungkook]: lets see if I can turn it into victory meal on second round
[You]: I’ll add a dessert if you win
[Jungkook]: that’s enough motivation for me
You smile again, silently wishing for his good luck. For a second you think of asking him about what Taehyung had said earlier. But maybe it would be better to ask directly tomorrow. Probably then you can see his real reaction, whether he’s truly forgotten or… is there another reason? A reason that makes your heart race just by the thought of it.
But by Saturday afternoon, you are humbled by the fact that some plans are not meant to be realized. That life always throws a curveball whenever you think things are going smoothly–or maybe in your case when you’ve been very excited and look forward to it.
You’ve already had a hunch when Seonho didn’t contact you at all until almost 3 PM. He always texts you whenever he’s on his way to pick up Miyeon. And somehow today, you kind of expected him to be late.
What you didn’t expect though is for him to totally bail. At 4 PM he finally calls you, saying he still can’t leave work and probably can’t take Miyeon this weekend. Of course it’s not the first time. In the span of one year since the divorce, obviously there were times when you and Seonho could not keep up with your arranged schedule. So this should not be something that you can’t handle.
But apparently there is something different this time that makes you bothered beyond belief, yet at the same time, being bothered makes you feel very guilty. Because to think about being annoyed that your ex husband can’t take your daughter with him so that you can go to your ex boyfriend’s apartment sounds very wrong within your moral compass. You shouldn’t feel that way, it’s like betraying the very essence of motherhood. Nothing should be more important than the well-being of your child.
However, you’re merely a human being with emotions. Sometimes we can’t regulate what we actually feel with what we should be feeling. This makes–not only your heart–your head ache.
[You]: I’m so sorry, I think we need a raincheck for tonight. Seonho couldn’t come, so I can’t leave Miyeon alone
[Jungkook]: It’s ok. Your daughter is more important.
On the other side of the city, Jungkook types his reply earnestly. Because he can understand. But understanding doesn’t mean he’s not disappointed. Not with you, and especially not with your daughter, only with the fact that the plan he was looking forward to tonight could not be realized. He looks around his apartment and sighs, feeling more saddened because he just spent half a day cleaning and re-arranging the place. Not that it was a total wreckage in the first place, he always keeps his place tidy, but he did spend a dedicated time this afternoon to make sure everything is ‘in place’. No dirty clothes lying around, no game controller left abandoned on the sofa, mopping the floor twice to ensure no dirt and dust are left behind, and honestly, last night he even stopped by the store to buy a new slipper for you.
Not that he counts the effort. Again, not at all. But the amount of disappointment he’s feeling right now makes him realize how much he really wants it.
He opens his text message to you once again, thumb hovering on screen, debating whether he wants to send another text to you. Even though he’s unsure what to say. All that he knows is just that he was prepared to be with you tonight. To enjoy your presence and company.
[Jungkook]: hey… was just wondering if it’s ok if maybe I go there instead? You’ve bought the groceries anyway, let’s make good use out of it.
[Jungkook]: only if you’re comfortable
You didn’t think he’d ask that.
You didn’t think he would actually try to spend time with you even though the circumstances had changed. But it was surely a pleasant surprise when you received his texts.
So when by 9PM you received another one informing he’s outside, you instantly get up from the couch and make your way to the front door.
“Hey.”
“Hey,” he scratches the back of his head and shyly smiles, “didn’t want to ring the doorbell, afraid it will wake somebody up.”
At first you were afraid he would perceive you differently when you said that you would love him to come but only after everyone’s asleep, but he assured you he understands. It’s not because you didn’t want him to meet Miyeon, but selfishly, you wanted this for yourself. This part of your life, this moment, with the man who looks too handsome for his own good at 9PM standing in your doorway with mussed hair and gentle smile. You want to preserve this moment for the single woman part of you, not the responsible daughter or mother.
“Thank you for considering. Everyone’s asleep, I told my mom though that you’re coming, come on.”
Stepping aside, you give him a moment to take his shoes off and shrug his denim jacket aside. With a boyish grin, he presents you a plastic bag containing a box of fried chicken and two bottles of soju, as promised.
The next twenty minutes you spend in your kitchen, cooking the jajangmyeon while trying to maintain the laughs and giggles in minimum volume so as to not awaken your mother and Miyeon. You knew Jungkook likes to cook by himself, he told you several times, but what you didn’t know was how serious he is with it.
The sound of knives against the cutting board and the scent of frying Chunjang (black bean paste) fill your kitchen. While you are focused on dicing some vegetables, Jungkook is busy stirring the sauce in front of the stove.
You glance at him and can’t help but smile seeing his eyebrows knit together in the middle while he’s all focused.
“How’s the sauce coming along, Kook?”
Jungkook looks up from the pan, eyes softening as they meet yours. His smile is comfortable, reassuring, “it’s perfect, come look.”
You lean in towards the stove, shoulder brushing with his firm one. The warmth from the stove and the warmth from him are suddenly one and the same.
“Wow, you’re really good at this, unless it’s packaged sauce, mine always looks like mud or asphalt.”
Jungkook lets out a low chuckle, his voice then sounds more encouraging when he explains, “it’s all in this first step. You have to roast the Chunjang in oil first to remove the raw and salty edge. It adds to the depth of the taste.”
Your breath hitches when he looks at you directly, “most instant recipes skip this, but if you wanted to make it properly, you can’t. That’s the difference between eating for survival and eating for pleasure. And honestly, I prefer pleasure.”
Why on earth he needs to add a wink after that last sentence is beyond you.
As if that act alone didn’t make your heart flutter, he then takes the wooden spoon from the simmering pot, dipping the tip of his index finger into the rich, dark Jajang sauce. The next moment feels like a slow-mo movie scene as he brings his finger to his mouth, tasting it with a focused intensity that makes your stomach clench involuntarily. You can tell he’s mouthing the word ‘perfect’ even though no sound is coming out from his lips.
Then, with a slow, deliberate motion, he dips his finger again, coating the pad with the thick, savoury sauce. His focus turns to you, gaze lifting to meet yours in a quiet challenge. He doesn’t need to say a word to explain his next action as he moves his hand, the sauce-tipped finger closer to your lips. The air is charged, tension thickens with every thrum of your heartbeat when you tilt your head just a little bit, lips parting slightly to meet his finger halfway, eyes never leaving each other as you gently draw the sauce into your mouth with a soft, sensual press. His thumb grazes your chin lightly, as you taste the flavourful sauce, fingers ghosting over your jaw.
“How is it?”
God, he really doesn’t need to whisper like that.
Your effort not to stutter fails miserably when you answer him, “g-good, delicious.”
“Yeah? Good enough for you?”
More than enough, you think. But the words don’t come out of your mouth. Instead, your eyes stray from his eyes to his lips, subtly glistening under the warm light of your kitchen. And the same thing happens to him, as you see his eyes drop to your lips. For a moment you feel like you just put on your noise cancelling headphones as everything goes silent. Your heartbeat thrums loudly, your palms sweaty as the distance grows closer and closer.
Unfortunately, things really don’t want to go your way that day. Because just when you’re about to close your eyes, Jungkook’s lips inches away from yours, your timer goes off, signalling the chicken reheating inside your oven should be done.
Both of you jolt back in reflex, eyes darting everywhere as you regulate the increased beating of your heart.
“Th-the chicken,” you murmur and Jungkook clears his throat, nodding a few times before searching for some gloves to take it out from the oven.
You move swiftly to turn off the stove, stirring the Jajang sauce one last time before preparing the noodles on a plate, “I think everything’s set?” trying your best to keep your voice steady even though you can still feel the heat of the previous moment in your cheeks and stomach.
“Yeah,” Jungkook replies, moving the chicken from the pan to a serving dish you’ve prepared earlier, “where do you want to eat?”
Contemplating your choices, you scan the dining table quickly before eyeing the coffee table in the living room. The dining table should be more practical, but the coziness of sitting on the rug, backs against the couch while the television is playing something as a background noise seems much more inviting, especially to soothe whatever tension between you and Jungkook before.
“How about the living room? Is it okay for you?”
“Wherever you’re comfortable with, Y/N.”
So you nod once again and start making your way to the living room, two bowls of Jajangmyeon in your hands while Jungkook carries the chicken and beers. You go back to the kitchen to take out some fresh kimchi and utensils, all the while Jungkook is arranging the food and drinks on the table.
You spend the next 30 minutes lost in conversations and food. Bodies relaxing against the couch, bowls in one hand while the other holding onto chopsticks, picking out some banchans or chickens in between taking the noodles and slurping it into your mouth. Jungkook wasn’t kidding when he said that roasting the beans adds more depth into the sauce because holy hell, the taste is incredible.
“This is hands down one of the best Jajangmyeon I had in a while.”
“Yeah? You like it?” Jungkook asks while sipping his beer, clearly amused by your satisfied face.
“So much, I can eat this a whole week.”
“That’s gotta be excessive.”
“Says mister I can eat daechang everyday.”
Jungkook laughs, and his laugh is always infectious to you. Your body shakes with muffled laughter, still remembering how your mother and Miyeon are fast asleep upstairs. In the middle of it all, you catch Jungkook’s gaze upon you. You try to hold your eyes on him too, but alas, you’re not as strong as you think you are, because it doesn’t take a minute for you to look away with cheeks as warm as the bowl of freshly cooked jajangmyeon.
“What?” you finally ask when you find out he is still eyeing you in between sipping his beer.
“Just appreciating this.”
“What’s there to appreciate that original plan is completely u-turned?”
“I think it’s a blessing in disguise.”
You decide to take a gulp from your own beer can, oblivious to what should be a correct response to his remark.
The TV is turned on and currently playing a random episode of How I Met Your Mother. A series you both decided to ‘watch’ when you started eating the food. But honestly, you haven’t paid attention to it the whole time. Not when the conversation flew easily, from the soccer match to random recipe hacks.
And now, even the brush of his knees against yours on the rug feels amplified.
“Thanks for letting me come by, and messing your kitchen up,” Jungkook adds, setting down his beer can on the table, his right arm resting upon the couch, fingers barely touching your elbow.
You shake your head, “thanks to you I get to eat a delicious meal, and free beers and chickens.”
“Anytime, Y/N.”
You put your beer can on the table too, next to his, before resting your head on the couch. He finally finds a place for his fingers to brush over your hair.
“I like this,” his voice softened, eyes boring into yours.
“The food or…”
He chuckles, moving closer, “the food only complimenting it.”
“Me too then…” everything feels too good for you, full belly, warmth tingling sensation in your heart, every stroke of his hands, you absentmindedly move your head even closer to his palm.
And Jungkook feels it. He can see the longing in your eyes. It matches his.
“You know… Taehyung asked about you.”
Oh, he finally told you about it. But why at this moment?
“Hmm?”
You can see his hesitation for a second, but Jungkook is determined to clear it out with you first before anything.
“He asked for your number. He’s interested in you.”
You then hold your head up from the couch, “uhm… yeah, he mentioned it when I ran into him at the supermarket.”
“Yeah… so… that’s that…”
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I’m telling you now, aren’t I?” he tries to counter.
“I mean, why not before?”
“Did you give him your number?”
“What would you prefer me to do, Kook?”
You can tell he is battling himself by the way he holds his word, teeth biting into his lower lip, eyebrows knitted in the middle of his forehead.
“I did give him my number,” you sigh, “I mean, I did it because he asked me whether you had mentioned it to me, which you didn’t, so I… just thought…”
Jungkook cups your chin in his hand, thumb gently brushing your cheek, “did he call you yet?”
“No.”
“Would you want him to?”
You close your eyes momentarily as your lips release another sigh from his gentle stroke, “I asked you that question first.”
“I…” another soft stroke and his thumb slowly descend to your lower lips, “can I kiss you?”
Opening your eyes, you nod your head before his lips finally claim yours. It’s tentative, exploring, but definitely different from your first kiss with him 15 years ago.
He was your first kiss, but to think of it again, maybe it was just a peck. A brush of lips meeting lips in a few seconds until you both pulled away out of timidness and shyness. But now, it feels totally different. His lips slotting against yours deeper, his moves are more precise and experienced, making your whole body weak.
It feels like a dam finally breaks with the way his hand moves to your nape, pulling you even closer if it’s possible as one of your legs already moved by itself over his thigh. Your heartbeat thrums loudly making your palms sweaty but dear God you wish the time stands still. If there are moments you want to freeze in time and memory, this certainly is one of them.
For a few seconds all you can hear is just wet sounds of your lips locking, a few whimpers from you and breathy exhales from him. You can feel his hesitance as his hands travel around your body, never really putting it on places you wish he would.
So, you do the most logical thing, take his free hand–not the one which is currently holding the back of your head, moving you gently the way he wants to devour your lips–and put it somewhere that matters.
“Fuck,” he mutters as your hand guide his to your ass.
Soon you realize that your decision wasn’t a good one. Because the moment his hand squeezes your ass, pulling your body even closer to his, you let out a loud moan which makes you realize that you are still in your living room downstairs while your daughter and mother are currently asleep upstairs.
Suddenly you’re hyper aware of every little sound in your house, worrying that someone might have woken up. You try to resist his kisses, try to put your hands on his hard chest while he’s still lost in you, licking your lips asking for entrance.
And you’re just a weak woman for Jungkook. Because you obey, separating your lips to let his tongue wander further. Whimpers of hesitation turn into desperation when you feel his bulge brushes deliciously against your aching core. He grunts, pulling you even closer as his lips travel to your jaw, making you circle your arms around his neck, fingers threading on his soft hair.
Just as you let out another soft moan–courtesy of Jungkook kissing the right spot under your ear–you hear the sound of a door opening, and a sleepy voice.
“Eomma? Where are you?”
You stand up hastily, peeling yourself away from Jungkook’s warmth. Jungkook instinctively steadying your hips as you’re about to fall from your panicked moves.
“J-just leave everything, I will clean it up later,” you say without even looking back at him, heart stammering inside your chest.
Jungkook can see the guilt behind your eyes as you hurriedly make your way upstairs. He rubs his face as he sighs softly. Not because he’s disappointed, but he’s genuinely concerned whether you regret what just happened. He clearly doesn’t. But he can see you look upset.
Glancing at the clock on the wall, Jungkook decides it’s too late to extend his welcome, so he cleans everything up and leaves your house quietly.
[Jungkook]: Hey, just wanted to let you know that I’m glad we kissed. I hope you feel the same way. Let’s talk when you’re available. Good night.
You know it’s stupid to avoid him. But you can’t shake that guilty feeling which has been eating you alive for a couple weeks now. You know you shouldn’t feel that way. Especially after reading his last message. You’re single, he’s single, there’s nothing wrong with two single people wanting each other. But this is uncharted territory for you. Navigating your desire while maintaining a status as a single mom. You feel irresponsible to give into your desire while there are too many responsibilities. It struck you the most when you realized how frustrated you were when Miyeon called you.
That guilt of wanting something for yourself is something you still need to manage. Because you are someone who is not used to prioritizing herself. Spending your life growing as an eldest daughter, then getting married quite young, being a mother, it’s as if you were never given time to think about your own desire as you are too used to thinking about how your actions will implicate others.
You don’t realize you’ve been looking straight to the TV, remote on hand, and yet, haven’t even turned the thing on. Memory keep playing back to that night, on this exact location, the same couch, his hands on yours, his quiet whimpers, the feeling of being wanted, by the man you really want for yourself too–
“Y/N?”
You almost drop the remote when your mother makes her appearances in the living room. Already dressed in her sleeping gown, a cup of ginseng tea on hand. She frowns slightly as the room is left dark, and yet, you don’t even turn the television on.
“What are you doing?”
“J-just watching the TV.”
She pauses a moment, before turning on the light. She studies your face for a second before asking silently whether she can sit next to you. You nod your head gently, giving her some space.
“Is there something wrong? You’ve been quite distracted lately.”
Well, she’s not wrong. You’ve almost packed Miyeon’s daycare backpack with your own lunchbox and green juice.
Also, that one day, instead of packing her a set of clothes (for backup if her clothes are wet that day), you put two pairs of trousers. Thank goodness her clothes remained dry and clean the whole day.
And maybe, this is not the first time your mother caught you unfocused in the past few weeks.
“Something happened with Seonho?” she asked carefully. Knowing you had been through hell and it might still be quite a sensitive subject.
You shake your head slowly, fingers moving nervously around your loose t-shirt hem. As you ponder whether to talk to her about it, she asks again, even slower than before.
“Is it Jungkook?”
And when you froze for a second, she knew she hit the right spot.
“I haven’t heard from him lately, is he okay?”
“Y-yeah… I supposed so… I haven’t talked to him for a while too…”
“Why? I thought… you two are… closer again?” she asks again, still tentatively.
Seeing the concern in her eyes, you think maybe you could finally talk to someone about this. You are hesitant at first, because how could you discuss something like this with your own mother? But then you remember, she had been helpful too during your difficult period with Seonho.
“We… kind of did… it’s just… I feel… guilty… and just confused because… the more I want to be with him… makes me forget about my responsibility as Miyeon’s mom… even confessing this makes me feel guilty because… how could you possibly put a man over your own daughter…”
Your mother hums softly, “I can understand where you’re coming from,” she puts her glass on the coffee table and makes herself sit more comfortably, “but don’t you think Jungkookie is a good man?”
Nodding your head, your mind travels to the memories of the past few months. He really is a good man, isn’t he? You recall his big brown eyes widened earnestly every time you start a conversation. And the way he is always turning towards your every bid–something you learnt in your therapy, about couple’s compatibility and how a healthy relationship requires each person to respond positively towards the other’s bid, or an invitation to connect–something you were missing with Seonho before. He rarely responds to your bid, especially towards the period where you know he’d been seeing someone else.
“What Miyeon deserves is a happy mother, and a happy mother requires you to be in a healthy mental space. I think your relationship with Jungkookie has helped you a lot in that case. I could see how much happier you were. You know, you got less frustrated with Miyeon lately. You talked even softer to her, as if… you gained more patience?” your mom says.
“Did I?”
“Yes, you did,” your mom pats your shoulder gently, “and as your mother, it makes me happy seeing you like that. I know you keep a lot to yourself, but I know what you went through was not easy. My dear, you deserve to be happy, and you deserve to think about yourself too. You have me, you have Kiho, we will all help you with Miyeon, you don’t have to worry about that. But you’re the only one who can help yourself with your heart.”
It’s very impulsive and your heart is still beating so fast from all the rush. Moments after your conversation with your mother, you texted Jungkook. Yeah, shameless really. After a couple weeks of radio silence. And worse, after an intimate moment you shared with him. You should not expect him to reply that fast, or at all. But he did.
[You]: Hey… can we talk? Sorry it took me this long.
[Jungkook]: Sure. Tell me when and where.
[You]: Can you share me your address? And can I come over? Like… right now?
Your mother had told you that she would sleep with Miyeon tonight. So, you don’t have to worry about her. That is why you find yourself just outside Jungkook’s apartment lobby at 10 PM on a weekday.
“Hey.”
He sounds the same. He looks the same too, a familiar view of Jungkook in a black zip up hoodie and a pair of sweatpants greets you as the automatic door opens up.
“H-hi… I’m sorry it’s so late and I–”
“Y/N,” his voice stern but gentle, “let’s go upstairs.”
You follow him to the elevator. The silence in between does make you move awkwardly. Something you haven’t been doing whenever you’re around him–even from the first time you saw him again. But you know it’s on you. You’re the one who ghosted him, left his message unreplied with the last impression that maybe you might regret what happened between you two.
Jungkook opens his unit door and lets you go inside first. You instinctively take off your shoes and your heart skips a beat upon seeing a woman’s size slipper just beside one you assumed is his–black and obviously man’s size. For a moment you think that maybe there was another woman he welcomed. But then again, who are you to control what he could and couldn’t do.
“I bought it a few weeks ago when we were supposed to hang out here. You know, to cook,” he says as if sensing your wandering mind.
“I’m sorry…”
He looks at you for a second, does not respond to your word directly but gesturing you to follow him towards what you assume is his living room. He then takes a seat on the couch and again, signalling you to also do the same.
“Again… I’m sorry… Kook, I really am I don’t–”
“What are you sorry about exactly?” he stops you mid sentence, knowing the way you avoid his gaze means you’re about to ramble around. It’s not like he doesn’t want to hear you rambling. Hell, he always finds it cute. But he needs you to cut to the chase right now. He’s been on the verge for the past few weeks. He knows your situation, and he has been trying to comprehend, trying to put himself in your shoes. And yes, moving on from a long committed relationship is not easy. There’s always a lingering feeling of whether you’re doing the right thing. Is it too fast, will this last, what would your ex think, and to add a child in that equation must have been overwhelming too. So, yeah, Jungkook could understand a fraction of what you might be feeling. But God does he need to hear how you feel about that night too.
“For leaving you on read…” you answer truthfully, because that’s the point that makes you feel so bad.
“Yeah, that was a little bit cruel,” he responds, a faint chuckle leaving his lips, “but really, what I’m dying to know is whether you regret it or not, Y/N.”
You can feel your heartbeat rising as your eyes locked with his. You think this might be your first time seeing that look on him. Piercing gaze looking straight to yours. Gone the friendly-neighbour Jungkook look you’re familiar with. You should feel intimidated really, but on the contrary, you are drawn to him. Like you want to prove to him that no, you don’t regret it at all.
So, you gather your courage and move closer on the couch, knees brushing his as you keep your eyes locked.
“No,” you shake your head slightly, “it’s the opposite really. I… I wanted you so bad it scared me.”
He moves closer too. Now that he hears your confession, he finds more confidence to cup your cheek, thumb brushes the apple gently, “yeah? Why? Did I scare you?”
“Not you,” you sigh, feeling his caresses, “just… I feel like a bad mom because for the first time in a long time, I wish I didn’t need to think about being a mom for a while and just…”
“Just…” he trails off, thumb moving closer to your lower lips, trying to control his urges seeing you close your eyes momentarily.
“Just be with you. Truly be with you.”
“You don’t need to forget about being a mom to be with me, I don’t mind that part of you at all, you just need to tell me what you feel and I’ll try to adjust as much as I can.”
“I know, that’s why I’m saying it’s not you, it’s me,” you lean your cheek deeper into his palm, “it’s scary because that night I was really disappointed and frustrated that… she woke up while I’m… while I wanted…”
He can sense your wants just by seeing the look on your face, so Jungkook moves even closer, his other hand moves to your nape, making your breath hitch, “you wanted what?” he leans down to you, nose brushing your jaw gently.
Your sanity officially leaves the chat when he finally kisses the back of your ear, an open mouthed one that leaves your skin wet but God you don’t mind at all. You can feel slick gushing from your core just from that one move. Your hands move instinctively around his neck, pulling him closer, “I want you, God, I want you so much.”
“Yeah? I want you too,” he trails kisses down your jaw, “can’t stop thinking about you it’s driving me insane,” as his lips brushes yours, he stops, closing his eyes, he mumbles against your lips, “let me have you?”
Your answer comes by taking his lips into a deep kiss, tightening your hold around his neck as he maneuvers you to sit on his lap, your thighs part to trap him in between yours.
It’s been too long for you to feel this desired, even just from a kiss. The way he moves your head, his tongue begging for entrance before battling yours, everything he does ignites the fire inside you.
“Can I have you?” he asks again, hands starting to move downwards towards your back, silently waiting for your answer before touching you in places he really desires.
“I’m yours, Kook,” you kiss him again before leaning back a little, fingers fiddling with the buttons of your blouse while keeping your eyes locked on him. It spurs you seeing how darker his eyes are getting. Lips red and swollen from the makeout session earlier, he rests his head against the couch, licking his lower lip.
“Show me what’s mine then.”
Holy hell, never knew being commanded like this makes you so aroused. So you unbutton your blouse slowly, giving a peek of that white lace bra you specifically picked earlier because sue you for being prepared.
You’re just a second done from peeling your blouse off when his hand palms your breast. Thumb grazing your nipple through the lacey fabric already making you whimper.
Jungkook leans forward, lips peppering kisses around your collarbone as he whispers against your skin, “pretty, is this mine?”
“Y-yes.”
“Show me what else is mine,” he commands after giving your chest a sloppy kiss and leans back again, waiting for you to make your next move.
You take the cue and get on your feet to take off your pants, trying your best to be seductive and sexy, but Jungkook can see your hands trembling so he leans forward to hold your hand.
“Hey, hey, you okay? We don’t have to do this.”
“No,” you firmly reply, because you DO really want it. It’s just… it’s been a while for you and the fact that you’ve only been intimate with your ex-husband has just dawned on you as you are lowering down your pants.
“I mean, I want this, it’s just… been a while.”
“I get it,” he responds, pulling you gently to his lap again–sans pants now, “come here, let me make you feel good,” lips peppering kisses down your neck, “don’t be shy, baby, feel what you’ve done to me,” he pulls your hips down against his hardened bulge under his sweatpants.
“Nghh,” you can help but moan when finally feeling that long awaited friction against your damp panties.
Seeing how you like it, Jungkook holds your butt with both hands before getting up, making you hold onto him tightly as he carries you across the room to where you assume is his bedroom.
Turns out you’re right, because then he lays you down on the bed, comforting cool cotton against your skin as you regulate your breathing from seeing him take off his hoodie first, and then a plain white t-shirt, before his bare torso greets your eyes.
And what a magnificent view it is. You finally get what you’re wishing for, to witness his tattoo along his right arm until the upper part of his chest. His shoulder to waist ratio is borderline sinful.
As your eyes trail down, the obvious tent on his grey sweatpants makes you both gulp and gush. You don’t think you ever salivate over a man like this before.
But before you can think further, Jungkook gets on the bed, caging you in, cups your face with one hand before kissing you again. You don’t waste anymore time exploring his body. Your smaller hands roam his sculpted body deliberately. And when he moans against your lips in specific places, you can’t help but raise your hips to meet his, chasing that delicious friction to your core.
He shucks his pants off along with his boxer hastily before grinding his hips against yours, “see how much I want you, can you feel it?”
“Y-yes, please, Jungkook…”
“Let me open you up,” he swallows your moan as his finger makes its way inside you, “God you’re so tight like this.”
“Please,” you squeeze his big arms, “please…”
“What do you need? Tell me, Baby,” lips all over your neck and jaw, he slowly adds a second finger, thumb circling on your pulsing clit.
The pleasure intensifies as you feel tears prickling your eyes, hips chasing his hands rapidly, “I need you inside, please…”
“My fingers are inside.”
Even in your state you can make out his smug smirk, teasing you.
“I need your dick, please, put it inside me.”
“Y/N, look at me.”
You pry your eyes open in between desperate whimpers. Gone the teasing smirk, his gaze is deep, focusing on you.
“Promise I’ll make you feel good, okay? Enjoy this with me?”
You nod a few times, breath hitching each second as his fingers move faster.
And then he slows down, taking it out of you as you gasp, already longing for his touch.
Before the cold air can even settle against your skin, he shifts, parting your thighs wider and settling his weight right between them. His length lines up against you, hot and thick, pressing into your slick warmth but not putting it in just yet.
“Fuck,” he closes his eyes momentarily before opening it again, leans down as he brushes his lips against yours, “feel how much I want you, how hard you make me?”
“Please… Kook, I want you too.”
He slowly pushes into you, inch by inch. You let out a shaken whimper as your body stretches to accommodate him. He’s big, that’s the first thing you realize as you feel the stretch is in between pleasure and pain.
“F-fuck,” Jungkook groans into your mouth, eyes half-lidded with pleasure. He stops moving for a second when he feels like he reaches deep enough, lips devouring yours in slow kisses to ease that tension he can feel on your body.
When he feels your hips start moving, searching for more, he begins to move, a slow, deep, devastatingly thorough rhythm. It’s not rough—not yet—but the sheer weight and depth of each stroke are dizzying. Every time he pulls back, it feels like a loss, and every time he drives back in, he leans his full weight into you, making sure you feel the hard press of his hips against yours, anchoring you to the bed.
“Kook, please,” you start to sob with every deep thrust, your fingers digging into the tight muscles of his back, your hips instinctively lifting to meet him.
“I’ve got you,” he whispers, his lips catching yours in a deep, bruising kiss, “fuck you feel so good,” he pairs the kiss with a sudden, sharper angle, hitting a spot deep inside that makes your toes curl and your vision go blurry.
It’s been so long since you’ve been held like this, making the sudden rush of intimacy feels like a physical shock to your system. Every touch of his skin against yours, the heavy slide of him stretching you open, triggers a wave of electricity that ripples straight to your core. And you’re defenseless against it. Your body reacts on its own, you let out a loud moan as your head rolls back into the pillow, your senses entirely overwhelmed.
“Too much?” Jungkook asks, his voice thick with a mix of concern and need. He pauses his moves, chest heaving against yours, but he doesn't pull out. He stays buried deep, letting you feel the pulsing thickness of him.
"No, no, don't stop," you cry out, the words frantic as you hook your legs higher around his waist, "It’s just... I’ve never... God, Jungkook, please."
The thing is, it’s not just the physical aspect of it. It’s in the way he looks at you, touches you like you’re the only thing that matters in this world, the way his large hand anchors your hips as if he’s afraid of losing you makes your heart and body flutter.
"I'm not stopping, Baby, I can’t," he growls, the sweet reassurance melting into a possessive rumble as he begins to move again.
This time, he picks the pace up. Your hips chase him blindly, movements uncoordinated and desperate as you both chase the high. You’re coming apart at the seams, tears spill over your lashes, blurring your vision of his face while you arch more into his heavy, deep thrusts.
One of his hand snakes over your chest, kneading your breast roughly as his thumb brushes hard over the peak. Your hips instantly buck upward against him, a high, broken gasp catching in your throat as your inside walls tighten and begin to throb in anticipation.
“I’m close, I’m so close, Kook, please…”
“Yeah? Come all over me, come on, be a good girl and come for me.”
His deep, gravelly voice is the final push your body needs as white-hot waves of pleasure crash straight through you. Your internal muscles clamp down around him in desperate, tight spasms as the orgasm rips out of you. Pulling him even closer, you cry his name out against his neck, fingers clawing at his broad shoulders as your hips tremble violently against his. This might be the most intense orgasm you’ve ever experienced in your entire life, leaving you a breathless, shivering wreck.
Jungkook groans heavily, his jaw clenching as he absorbs the intense, squeezing pressure of your climax. He holds himself deep inside you for a few seconds, letting you ride out the peak, his hands gently rubbing up and down your thighs to soothe your trembling body.
“That’s it, Baby,” he murmurs, tone softening while peppering soft, comforting presses along your jawline, “did so good, made a mess of my dick.”
When your breath begins to level out, you feel him slightly shift. But he doesn't pull back. Instead, the heavy thickness of him presses deeper, still rock-hard and pulsing against your sensitive walls. A low, warning chuckle vibrates in his chest when you let out a tiny whine.
“Yeah, so… I’m not done with you yet,” he nudges your nose gently, a stark contrast with the way his hard dick is pulsing inside you, “you think you can still handle it?”
“Y-yeah,” because of course you’re still very much physically attracted to him. Especially now with his damp black hair, buffed chest glistening with sweat and oh so intoxicating sex-induced smell of his body. So whatever sensitivity you feel down there, yeah, it really can be negotiated.
You show him by pulling his head closer, capturing his reddened lips with yours in a deep sensual kiss, tongue searching for him while your small hand roams over his tight abs.
“I want you to cum, Kook, fuck me until you cum,” you mumble in between kisses, earning a hiss from him before he picks your body, move up on the bed as he sits against the headboard with you on his lap.
Your hands instinctively hold onto his shoulder, lifting your body, you watch him stroking his dick with one hand while the other guiding your hips slowly down.
You know it’s going to burn a little from this position, but damn it’s worth the pain when he is finally buried to the hilt.
“Fuck, look at you,” he groans, head snapping back against the headboard. With his large hands anchoring you, you begin to ride him. The position allows you to feel him even deeper, hitting new spots that send hot pleasure all over your senses. Jungkook guides your rhythm, thumbs rubbing your hips, pulling you down harder when he needs more pressure.
When you thought he couldn’t look hotter, you’re proven wrong. Not when his glassy eyes darken with desire bore into yours, half-lidded, breath ragged with sweats rolling down from his neck to chest.
He catches your look, a lazy smirk tugs at the corner of his lips. His hand cups your face, thumb pulling your bottom lip down, “you look so sexy like this, riding my dick so good, gonna let me have this forever, yeah?”
You nod, tongue brushing his thumb before catching the whole thing and sucking it eagerly.
Jungkook snaps his head back harder this time, strings of curses escape his lips as he bucks his hips faster. Pulling his thumb off of you, he uses it to circle your clit. It really doesn’t take long before you feel that familiar bubbling sensation, waiting to burst. And when he leans forward to take one of your bouncing breasts into his mouth and suck greedily, you feel the coil snaps inside, sending jolts of pleasure all over your body.
Before you can process anything, in one fluid, effortless motion, he pulls you out and shifts you onto your knees between his legs. He reaches down, his fingers gently tangling in your hair to guide your head down toward his lap, where his length is pulsing and heavy.
"Open up for me, baby," he begs, his voice dropping into a rough, desperate whisper as his thumb brushes over your lower lip, “take it for me, let me cum in your pretty mouth please.”
How could you say no when he asks you so nicely, but also, you want it, badly. You want to see him fall apart the way he made you two times earlier. Looking up at him through your lashes, you part your lips and take his hot, heavy length. The sensation makes Jungkook let out a loud, guttural groan, his eyes fluttering shut as his hands tighten in your hair, holding you gently but firmly in place. He begins to move his hips in slow, shallow thrusts, whole body shaking with the strain of holding back.
"So good... fuck, gonna cum," he pants, his breath hitching as the climax finally hits him, fingers anchoring you as he releases inside your mouth. He holds himself there for a few seconds, riding out the powerful, pulsing waves of his climax while whispering breathless, sweet praises to you. You instinctively swallow everything, before wiping your lips with your hand.
Jungkook immediately reaches for you, his strong arms hooking under your arms to pull you upward until you're collapsed against his chest, head tucked under his chin. He holds you tight, large hand rubbing slow, soothing circles over your bare back.
“You okay?” he asks, while you feel a gentle kiss on top of your head.
“More than okay,” you emphasize by nuzzling further into the crook of his neck. Sweat be damned.
The quiet of the aftermath brings a sudden, heavy wave of reality crashing back into your mind. You trace a mindless pattern over his collarbone, the warmth of his skin grounding you, but you can’t shake the thoughts away. What happens after this? And did it happen just because of familiarity?
"Jungkook?" you whisper, voice small inside the quiet bedroom.
“Yeah?”
“What happens after this?”
He stops his movement, peering his eyes down at you, making you a little distracted with those glossy boba eyes, very much different from the intense pair when he railed you into the mattress.
“What I want is to be with you, if you have me. I’ll learn whatever you want me to learn, about your routine, what you need from me in terms of your relationship with your daughter,” he strokes your cheek softly, “whatever it takes to make you feel comfortable, because that's what you’ve given me.”
“Comfort?”
“Yeah.”
“What if that’s just what it is.”
“What do you mean?”
You can see even in faint light how his brows knit together.
“I mean, what if we just fall into a comfortable, familiar area because we already know each other? It's easy to slide back into old patterns when you meet someone from your past. I just... I’m worried that we're confusing nostalgia with something real."
Jungkook shifts slightly, a small, tender smile tugging at the corner of his lips as he frames your face with his two large hands, leaving you no choice but to look at him in the eyes.
"First of all, comfort is not a bad thing," he says, voice steady and convincing, “I know this might look like it, believe me, I struggle with this thought at first too,” his large thumb brushing the apple of your cheek lightly, “tried to convince myself that we’re just old friends, but I realized that friends could also become lovers. And maybe even better, because not only I want to tell you everything about my day, or whatever interesting comes my way, but also…” his thumb grazes your lips, “I want to kiss you too, I want to hug you, I don’t like the idea of anyone giving you romantic attention–”
“Taehyung?” you say while smiling mischiveously.
He chuckles with you, head leans a little to give you a quick smooch, “yeah, honestly it was also the moment when I realized, no, I don’t want her to go on a date with him, or anyone else. Because I want to be the only one who takes you out.”
He pulls you back into his embrace, your hand around his waist as you snuggle closer, “I feel that way too… like… I wanna tell you about my day, about what I feel or what makes me laugh.”
“Yeah?”
You nod, “I haven’t felt being heard for a while now… so…”
He holds you tighter, lips pressing another kiss on the top of your head, “I’ll hear you out, and on the days that I’m not 100% in it, I’ll tell you. And we’ll learn, okay?”
“Okay.”
You both fall into comforting silence, savouring each other’s presence until your bodies adjust itself into an even more comfortable position. Your back against his chest while his arms wrapped around your waist, lips peppering kisses on your shoulder.
“Promise you talk to me if anything’s bothering you, yeah?” he whispers, lips brushing behind your ear.
“Okay… promise you tell me if I did something wrong?”
Jungkook knows it’s a question based on your previous trauma. So he kisses your shoulder, another one lands behind your ear.
“I will. I won’t shut you out, Y/N, we’ll talk, okay? Even when it’s messy, we’ll talk.”
You turn your body to face him, to look him right in the eye to search for any doubt, any crack, but you found none. He just looks at you with genuine determination.
“What’s running inside this pretty head, huh?” he asks, fingers playfully flicking your forehead.
“You know, at that daechang place, when you asked me how I feel about dating.”
“Oh yeah,” Jungkook remembers that conversation, the night he thought you were so cute.
“And I told you, I was confused, because I wanted something but I don’t know what, because I keep calculating about being a mom and also being a single woman.”
“You know you could be both with me,” he adds, lips pressing a firm kiss on your forehead.
“Yeah, so now I know what I want, it’s something just like this.”
Later, before you go into deep slumber with his arms around your waist, you feel like the lingering doubts in your mind finally begin to settle into a quiet sense of hope. Maybe, just maybe, this history between you wasn’t a crutch, but a foundation. When you broke up all those years ago, it hadn’t been because the feelings died, life had simply pulled you apart before you were ready.
And now, fate had thrown you back together after surviving the wreckage of failed marriages—you, walking away from a husband who couldn’t stay faithful, and Jungkook, untangling himself from a relationship that had choked to death on silence and poor communication. Both of you had been broken down, but had also grown up. As you feel the weight of his arms around you protectively, you realize that the scars you both carried were no longer just baggage. They were lessons. You knew the cost of betrayal, and he knew the danger of staying silent.
Slotting your fingers in between his, you try to believe that this time, the risk might be worth it. Because in this short life, you deserve to love and be loved by the right person. And sometimes, it’s not always a new one.
END
A/N: Thank you so so much for reading, and even more special thanks to those who read the first 2 parts 9 months ago and still want to continue reading this. Again, I'm so sorry for the long update but hopefully the last part make up for it (even just a little hehe).
