DUDE Y E S. the first time i read IT i was genuinely confused how kaspbrough wasn't popular because eddie's crush on bill was fucking insane. king tried to write it off as admiration but it is fucking THERE. as a person who admired many people both before and admire now, the thing eddie had for bill the entire book was so much more that i was in shock that the fandom at the time didn't talk about it that much. all losers admired bill as a kid but never as much as eddie did.
also their bond? their fucking bOND???? how eddie always reached for bill first, how bill always pulled eddie behind him???????? how they always looked at each other first???? it wasn't evident in the films but THE BOOK DUDE. the moment i finished it i was writing kasbrough minifics im not even kidding.
they are so fuckjng fluff shaped i wanna jingle them like keys
Pj I see all those other prompt requests and I will use them, eventually.
Also this #11 "You can't save me" for Kaspbrough
Rating: G
The story of Bill and Eddie was simple. They have been in love with each other since they were old enough to understand the concept of it, Bill got drunk one night in college and confessed his feelings, and they dated, happily, for the next seven years.
After everything they’ve been through, the sewers, IT, of course, they fell in love. Eddie still had nightmares, but Bill didn’t know that. Eddie never screamed during them, instead just laid there, frozen with fear, convinced he could still smell IT’s rancid breath breathing down his neck. He’s had nightmares for years, they never stopped for him, but he’s managing.
Bill thrashes in his sleep when his mind is racing with a new nightmare. Just like he is tonight. He’s cold is the reason he wakes up, the blanket is off of him. When he looks over at Bill, he realizes Bill must have kicked their blanket.
Sweat has broken out across Bill’s skin, his nightshirt is damp and stuck to him under his armpits and at his neckline. His hair is plastered to his forehead and he looks like he’s in pain as his head twists and turns against his pillow. Bill’s hands are clenched in fists at his sides, twisting back and forth near his waist as if he was ready to lash out and punch something.
Gently Eddie shakes Bill awake, ready to jump back if Bill jolts out of the bed, as he’s done before. “Billy you gotta wake up.”
Bill doesn’t budge so Eddie shakes him a little harder, finally causing Bill’s eyes to shoot open. He sits up and bewilderedly scans the room, looking for the clown. His shoulders and back are tense, but they always are. Bill is always prepared for an attack.
Eddie has asked Bill repeatedly to talk about his nightmares over the years, to no avail. Bill feels the need to protect Eddie, even from his own mind. Much to Eddie’s annoyance.
After realizing that no leaper is lurking in the shadows, Bill relaxes just a little. Eddie sighs and gets off the bed, padding into the kitchen to get Bill a glass of water. He accepts the glass with a small ‘thanks’ and takes measured sips of it, trying to get his heart rate back to normal. Eddie sits back on their bed and waits until he’s done.
“Do you want to talk about it?” he asks him.
“No.”
Yeah, he could have guessed that answer. It’s hard to not get annoyed at this point. Bill is twenty-seven years old and after seven years together, he still won’t talk to him! Eddie rolls his eyes and pulls the blanket back on him, rolling over so his back is facing Bill.
Bill doesn’t say anything when he curls up behind Eddie, spooning him. He’s oblivious to Eddie’s annoyance, as always. Eddie lets Bill pull him so his back is flush against Bill’s chest. Usually, this would easily lure Eddie back to sleep but tonight he’s just glaring at an offending lamp across the room.
Wiggling out of Bill’s arms he sits back up, looking down at a confused Bill. “Why can’t you talk about it?”
Bill sighs and places a hand on his arm, “Puh-please Eddie,” he pleads, “I duh-don’t want to tuh-talk about it.”
That gets Eddie out of the bed. He doesn’t know why he’s so angry but he is. “But I do. You never talk to me! Not really, not about anything serious!” he grasps the sides of his head, “It’s like you treat me with little kid gloves, Bill!”
He regrets saying that the moment it’s out.
Bill looks even guiltier than he usually does and Eddie feels like there's a hole in his stomach. He tries to speak, opening his mouth but then shutting it a few times, his stutter starting to get the best of him. He takes a deep breath and tries again, “I duh-duh-don’t mean to, I’m suh-suh-s-sorry.”
Eddie deflates, “No, I’m the one who’s sorry. I didn’t mean that. It’s just that sometimes, sometimes it feels like that. Especially when you won’t tell me what’s going on in your head, what you’re remembering,” tears start welling up in his eyes, “I just want to help you.”
After what they went through, what that fucking clown put them through, there’s no way to really help one another but they still try. All the losers try to be there for one another, but Bill isn’t even letting him do that.
He sits up and brushes a stray tear off Eddie’s cheek, kissing him softly on the forehead. When he pulls back he looks into his eyes, and those baby blues remind Eddie of all the days he’s spent getting lost in them. “Eddie, I need you to luh-listen to m-me,” he says so steadily, “You can’t save me.”
His immediate reaction to shove against Bill, “Bullshit!” he protests, “How dare you tell me that! After all the time I’ve watched you help the other losers, help me, trying to save us from ourselves! Don't you dare tell me I can’t try to do the same for you!”
“Eddie please,” he pleads.
“No Bill! Will you just please talk to me!”
Bill doesn’t say anything for the longest time, his face sad and tired. The bags under his eyes have only gotten worse. He expects Bill to say something, but all he does is lays back down, on his side of the bed, and tries to go back to sleep.
Eddie stares in disbelief for a moment, but when Bill doesn’t move, he leaves their bedroom. The couch is uncomfortable and bad for his back, so the next night he makes sure Bill sleeps on it.
A/N: I needed a break from writing other things. Here you go Pj, I'll let you decide if Bill and Eddie are fine after this.
Chapter Seven: Stan (The Present: Part Four)
Chapter Specific TWs: OCD, disordered eating, touch aversion, spider imagery, crying, drinking, swearing, sexual content
AO3 Link
See below the cut for more information on this story.
Title: Touch Me (I want to be Dirty)
Pairing: Poly Losers, Steddie-Centric (everyone will get lots of attention)
Summary: Eddie Kaspbrak thought he moved on from his mother’s abuse, but when she died his trauma unexpectedly resurfaced. His fear of germs, sickness, and contamination came back with a vengeance. Unable to process his emotions and unwilling to go to therapy, Eddie struggles to let his lovers touch him, especially Richie. Stan vows to help Eddie overcome his trauma and reclaim his intimacy with the Losers.
Rating: Explicit
Tags (so far): Hurt/Comfort, Eddie Kaspbrak Has OCD, Eddie Kaspbrak Has Issues, Stanley Uris Has OCD, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Canonical Child Abuse, Sonia Kaspbrak’s A+ Parenting, Abusive Sonia Kaspbrak, Munchausen Syndrome by Proxy, Working Through Problems, BDSM, Adult Losers Club (IT)Aged-Up Losers Club (IT)References to Illness, Non Graphic Vomiting, Vomiting, Brainwashing, Stomach Ache, Sickness, Donald Uris is a dick, Andrea Uris is great, Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Nudity, Explicit Language, Blasphemy, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Self-Medication, Bathing/Washing, InsecurityTouch Aversion, Intrusive Thoughts, Sexual Content, Sexual Tension, Mental Health Issues, Panic Attack, Extreme Dissociation, Germaphobia, Sickness, Colds & Flu, Touch Aversion, OCD, Swearing, Dubiously Consented Squish
Link on AO3
okay but after IT chapter 2 bill goes on to write about pennywise and the losers, but he doesn’t know how to describe himself as a kid. so he calls the other losers to hear how they viewed him when they were younger and that’s when he begins to realize that literally all of his friends wanted to bone him
Just wanted to post about how beautiful and adorable Bill is and how I would pay to watch an entire film where he’s being cuddled and told how precious he is.
