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Curious of You | Lee Know

Summary: Years after your exchange in Australia, you met your little host brother Felix again, but this time he was older and more famous. Entering his life again might bring you more than you expected.

Pairing: Minho x plus size!fem!reader

Word count: 9.4k

Content Warnings: fluff, a bit of angst (?), mentions of extreme beauty standards, mentions of fatphobia, mentions of bullying, mentions of anxiety, mentions of food and eating, reader is older than Minho, Minho is a bit awkward lol, Felix is an absolute angel and a kid at heart with reader bc he sees her as his big sister

Note: Italicized sentences are in korean

a/n: it took me a while (and three drafts) to finish this but I finally made it. It's not my best work tbh, I think it could've been better but my mind was blank and I was suffering with writer's block. so yeah… hope you guys enjoy it either way. don't forget to like, reblog and comment if you feel like, it always makes me happy ^^

⚠️ english is not my first language so I apologize if there's any mistake

⚠️ this is a piece of fiction, in any way or form I intend to say that the people portrayed in the story act this way.

⚠️ as a writer (and artist and designer as well) I do condone the use of AI for creative work, therefore, I DO NOT use AI, nor consent to the use of my work for feeding machines.

⚠️ Do NOT repost my work

The little sun rays passed through the small cracks of the old wooden window of your bedroom. The yellowish-white shining across the room, specks of dust that flied being visible against the light. The birds outside your building already sung at full chest, the low hum of the traffic being heard a bit far from your neighborhood.

Slowly, your body started to stir awake, limbs stretching to regain their conscious movements, your breath becoming more deep and controlled. Your mouth opened wide in a silent yawn that stretched a little longer, a small whine leaving your lips at the end. It was saturday, yet your biological clock woke you up almost at the same time you woke up everyday for work. Even with jet lag.

It's been a couple of weeks since you moved from your small town to Seoul to work. You got a job opportunity a few months back and went through all the interview process leading you where you are. To be in a position as you are, especially being a foreigner is not easy, but you managed to get the job. And be good at it so far.

It's not easy to move to a whole different country with a completely different culture, but you were thankful for still keeping in touch with the Lees, your host family from when you were an exchange student in Australia. The Lees not only received you in their house, but also took you as one of theirs since you were close to their eldest in age.

So when the news broke that you were moving to South Korea, they were very happy and thrilled for you, specially Felix, who also lived in the capital. The young boy was so excited to finally being able to see you again after so many years. "I've changed so much noona, you won't be able to recognize me" he had told you when you told him about you moving, making you laugh and agree.

Ever since you left Australia, a lot has changed both in yours and their lives. You finished your college degree, got a mild boring desk job and your life fell into a routine.

Felix, however, moved to Seoul, became a trainee and, a while after, he debuted in a kpop group. You remembered how much the boy loved to dance, always moving around the house and even trying to teach you - to no success - a few moves.

You've kept tag on the boy's work, accompanying every comeback, watching every MV and sending him praises and encouraging messages every single time. It would take a while for him to answer you, after all, he was a busy man now, but he always made sure to respond. You and him would send each other videos and memes that you thought the other would like once in a while, sometimes even sending him something funny you saw that stays did.

Before you moved to Seoul, he sent you his study notes and textbooks, both in the language and the culture. Which you were so glad because otherwise you would have made a fool of yourself on the first days. Not that that stopped the judgmental looks from your Korean coworkers, thankfully there were more foreigners that welcomed you.

After feeling fully awake, you grabbed your phone at the nightstand by your side. 8:18AM. You sighed. It was still early and you wanted to sleep more. You saw notifications from Felix and smiled.

lilix: hey noona i hope you haven't forgot about our lunch today

lilix: i miss u so much and i can't wait to see u

lilix: and the boys can't wait to meet u 2

Your heart thumped in your chest. The boys as in the boys? You took a deep breath in and exhaled through your mouth. You could do this. You definitely could. They were just Felix's friends. Not a bunch of handsome idols who happen to also be your friend's friends.

You typed a response back to the boy saying that you couldn't wait for it and threw your phone by your side.

The truth was that ever since you moved to South Korea, your self esteem hasn't been the best. Everywhere you looked it had ads for skin whitening products, for skin care products, brands and clinics, ads for plastic surgery clinics, weight loss pills and medicines. You saw the way your coworkers looked at you with disdain, disgust. As if your size affected your work or your abilities. You even overheard a group of your coworkers say when they thought you weren't hearing that if you couldn't take care of yourself and your health, how would you be responsible at work? As if your size meant you were unhealthy or irresponsible.

All of that talk, their crooked looks, the bombarding of ads and what not with impossibly skinny people was starting to get through you. You always been a big girl, it was part of who you were. But it was also part of the society to judge people based on their looks, rather than who and how they were.

You phone buzzed at your side once, twice, three, four times before you grabbed to see that it was your lovely host brother answering you.

lilix: feel free to come whenever u want noona we r all here already

lilix: the sooner you come more we can catch up

lilix: [address]

lilix: I already left your name in the entrance so you can come in with no problem

You smiled imagining him with his childish and endearing smile saying those words. You missed him dearly.

you: k, i'll take a shower and get ready and i'll let you know when i'm on the way

lilix: yay

lilix: can't wait to see u noona

you: can't wait to see you too cupcake

You sighed again, eyes scrunching closed as you mustered all your courage and will to leave the bed and take a shower.

The water was warm as it fell upon your body, relaxing your muscles and trying to wash away all your negative and nervous thoughts. Today was about reuniting with your little brother. And nothing more. You know that despite all that changed in his life, he hasn't changed much in personality, still being the sweet boy you once met.

As you left the longer-than-usual shower and dried yourself, the next set of anxiety hit: what clothes should you wear? It was already a bit warm outside, the end of spring and beginning of summer starting to show their faces. You looked over your options of clothes and felt like nothing was appropriate enough. Too formal. Too informal. Too fancy. Too casual. You wanted to make a good impression yet not look like you were trying too much.

After what it felt like ages, you decided on a simple pair of mom jeans with cute little strawberries embroidered all over the front, a plain light pink t-shirt, a red beret to match the strawberries on the pants, your trusted companions, a pair of white sneakers, and some jewelry to accessorize. It was simple yet you were feeling good with yourself in it.

You called a cab and sent a message letting Felix know you were already on your way.

You held the bag you were taking with such a strong grip that your knuckles were turning white. During all the ride you were repeating the "it's just Felix" mantra so you could calm your nerves. It wasn't helping much but it was better than nothing.

After what it felt like ages you arrived in front of a big fancy building. You left the taxi after paying the man and slowly entered the lobby, the cleanness and almost aseptic look of the place made you feel a little bit out of place.

You walked over the overly dressed man behind the desk and identified yourself, giving your name and saying that you were there to visit your friend with your broken korean. He allowed you to enter, but not before sizing you up and giving you a fake sympathetic smile.

The elevator ride was too quick for your own good and when the doors opened your were attacked by a pair of arms that engulfed you in a thigh hug. You felt your body release it's tension right away, he was, after all, the same boy you used to know and cherish and that would get overly happy every time you would come back from your classes back in Australia.

"Oh my God, noona! I can't believe you're really here!" his voice came out muffled from being buried in your neck, the tip of his now long hair prickling your face and neck.

You smiled to yourself and caressed his back, returning his hug and letting yourself relax at his arms. "I'm really here, Lixie. I'm here with you" he finally let go of you and you could see his wet eyes. "Baby, no! Don't cry!" you cleaned a little tear that tried to scape his eye and he nodded. He could be older, hotter and even famous now, but deep down he still was your little brother. "You know that if you cry I'll cry too. Now, you don't wanna see me crying, do you?" he denied and you smiled and kissed his forehead.

"You haven't changed a thing, noona" the blonde boy smiled, his hands holding yours tightly as of afraid you'd leave again. "You look exactly the same and even smell the same" he chuckled.

"I hope that's a good thing" you cocked your head and he nodded, hugging you again. "Well, I can't say the same thing about you" you held him by his shoulders and looked at him from head to toe, grabbed his hand and made him twirl. "Puberty hit you really hard" you both laughed. "Looking all handsome, all pretty, being desired all around the world, huh?" his cheeks tinted a light shade of pink at your statement.

"C'mon, noona, the boys are dying to meet you" he pulled you through the corridor to his apartment, and you could see a few heads entering the door, probably spying on you.

Each step you took closer to the apartment you could feel your heart going back to it's crazy state. The beats loud and fast. Your breathing hard and shallow.

It's just his friends, yn. Nothing more. You can do this.

Nothing prepared you for the mess that has taken place in the apartment, boys scattered around trying to look as natural as possible, as if they weren't piled up in the door watching your interaction with Felix for the past minute. The scene made you chuckle to yourself, they could be worldwide idols but they still were young boys after all.

The idea and the scene made you a little more at ease.

A deep breathe leaving your lungs.

"Guys, this is yn, my older sister from another mother" you bowed and greeted them the best you could with your basic korean. "yn, these are my friends, do you remember them?"

"I think so, yeah" you answered honestly and felt your cheeks heating at the attention on you. "Nice to finally meet you, guys. Sorry I don't speak much korean, I'm still getting the hang of it" they nodded, some of them dismissed your apologies. "Felix talks a lot about you guys, he really likes you all"

"NOONA!" he groaned shyly, hiding his face on your shoulder. "I was supposed to look cool" you chuckled at him and ruffled his hair.

"Felix talks about you a lot too, especially since he found out you were moving to Seoul" it was Chan who spoke, arms crossed on top of his chest, a caring look on his face as he watched his member. "So, you lived in Sidney?"

Easy enough, all of you engaged in a conversation about your lives, funny stories that you could share about Felix when he was younger, stories about tours, memories they gathered along the way.

It was easier than you thought to fall into their rhythm, to talk with them, forget they were worldwide stars and just friends with your little brother. They were chaotic, especially trying to speak english with you, voices overlapping each other, each one trying to sound louder than the first.

Your cheeks were hurting from smiling and laughing so much. You could see yourself entering their world, being their friend.

All of them made an effort to talk to you, especially the ones that didn't speak english very well. But one of them seemed off, far from the conversation.

Minho barely spoke, barely reacted except for a few small smiles and huffs whenever he was addressed. You wondered if it was because of the language barrier or because he didn't like you. After all, you could be very expansive often times, especially when you got excited.

Once in a while you'd look at him just to get him already looking at you. You'd smile at him politely and he would just turn his head away, like he was scared. He truly was a cat like people said.

"But I don't think I'm that bad" Felix said and hugged your arm, nudging into your side like he used to do when he was in trouble with his parents and wanted you to protect him. "Don't you agree, noona?"

"Huh? Agree on what?" you felt our cheeks heat up for not paying proper attention.

"That me enjoying my young life while on tour make me a bad person" you turned to look at him and knew exactly what he was talking about. That menace.

"Well, as long no one is getting hurt, or pregnant, along the way, I think you're allowed to have your fun, yeah" he hugged your arm tighter as if you had saved him from the final judgment and you chuckled from his antics.

"What about you, yn, do you have your fun? Are you single?" it was Seungmin that asked, genuinely curious.

You denied with your head. "I'm not much of a fun person, at least not in the way you guys are talking about" you answered with half a smile, suddenly all your terrible past experiences with lovers passing through your mind like a movie. "And yeah, I've been single for as long as I can remember" you chuckled, more at yourself than anything else, and shrugged.

"Love life is ruthless, man" Jisung exclaimed and threw himself back in the sofa, shaking his head in denial making everyone laugh.

You felt a distinguish pair of eyes on you but decided to avoid it, maybe you were thinking too much into it.

It was a little past noon when the lunch was served. All nine of you squeezing to fit into the tiny table of Felix and Seungmin's dorm. The laugh was loud and warm as the food was placed on the table, many dishes that you couldn't recognize but looked very appetizing, others you remember from eating at the Lee's house back in the day.

Everything smelt great and your stomach rumbled from hunger, making the boys - even Minho - laugh at it. Hunger was as international language.

You all started to serve yourselves, Felix talking you through the dishes and side dishes and helping serving you. The conversation was subdued, mouths full of delicious food.

You were sat between Felix and Jisung, the boys once in a while saying something that made you laugh. Right in front of you was Changbin and Minho, the latter quiet, watching everything around him unfold intently.

You were eating slowly, chewing slowly, in your own mind when you thought that they would judge from eating too fast, when you fell someone put some kimchi and a leaf of perilla in your bowl. You looked up to find Minho looking at you with doe, almost shy, eyes. Cheeks tinted with a light hue of pink.

"Eat. More" he told you, the words separated, rough around the edges with his thick accent, and sat back into his place.

You thanked him silently, bowing your head and smiling, cheeks burning.

The table fell silent after, the boys looking at each other puzzlingly, yet smirks already adorned their lips. You could only look at your food, too shy too look up again.

Minho looked the same.

After lunch - and a lot of debate for not letting you clean the dishes because you were a guest -, the nine of you scattered yourselves around the living room again. Some on the couch, some on the ground, Seungmin and Changbin fighting for the armchair before settling with the older sitting on the lap of the youngest (out of spite).

You were sat in the middle of the couch, Felix glued to you on one side, arms wrapped around your own and head resting on your shoulder, while Minho was on your other side. Stuck. Stiff. Spine so straight that would impress their physical therapist.

The energy was high again, lower than the morning due to everyone being stuffed with food, but it was there. Conversations rolling. English and Korean words flying across the room and over your head.

You admired them as they shared a part of their life with you. They felt so comfortable with your presence that they didn't even tried to be someone else or put out the idol facade for you. You felt happy that they felt like that with you.

But you couldn't say the same about yourself.

Not that you were lying or being someone else. But most of the days you saw yourself wearing this mask, this disguise as someone confident, uplifting, like you had your life all figured it out. But the truth was far from that.

Even though you believe that in reality no one has a thing figured out, you couldn't help and feel a little lost, out of yourself. What were you doing? Where were you going? What's the purpose of it all? Your white ceiling and you had more conversations about those questions that should be considered healthy.

Throughout your childhood and teen years you've never been the most confident person, mostly because how you were perceived and judged and excluded because of your body. So you built it piece by piece, little by little over the years. It wasn't perfect, but it was what you had, and that was enough for you.

That was until you moved to Seoul and you felt your confidence decrease exponentially. You were looked upon and judged every singled day, no matter where, no matter by who. Everything you did was questioned - and judged - by your weight and your size.

You felt a nudge in your side and looked at the dancer staring at you. His posture now not as stiff but still perfect, almost cautious. "You okay?" his English was really cute, you thought, and nodded with a small not-really-convincing smile. He nodded back at you, not really knowing what to say because he wasn't as good in English to properly have a conversation.

Felix had fallen asleep on your other side, softly snoring as he fell onto Jeongin's shoulder, that was also fast asleep. You smiled fondly at them. You gently and carefully stroked Felix's long locks that fell into his face and unsuccessfully tried to tuck them behind his ear. Had his freckles increased and darkened?

Minho lifted from the sofa and motioned for you to follow him. You two walked past the boys and went to what you assumed was Felix's room due to the organized mess he didn't seem to grow out of and pictures of him and his family scattered around the place.

You followed the boy to the little balcony behind the big glass windows that were hidden by a thick dark curtain. He leaned himself on the railing and you copied him.

For a while you two watched as the city moved under you like a miniature of themselves. Cars and people moving left to right and right to left, the city noise something you were starting to get used to.

You turned to observe the dancer, his side profile so perfect, his nose looking like something sculpted in white marble by the more skilled hands in renaissance, his lips plump and a beautiful shade of pink, his jaw chiseled and marked, while his cheeks held a faint tint of pink. Was it warmth or something else? His eyes sharp yet holding a softness deep down that you could see he was waiting the right moment to let go. His hair soft and fluffy. You'd give starts to run your hands through his locks.

He noticed you staring at him - not that he cared - and turned to look back at you, getting you by surprise and making your own cheeks burn and you turn your head to the side quickly.

Minho chuckled at you. Cute. You were definitely cute.

You both stood in silence for a little longer before you broke it. "Why did you called me here?" You asked with the best Korean you could muster. If his English was rough, your Korean was wobbly.

He simply shrugged his shoulders, not even him knew the answer to that. He only wanted your company.

You waited for the answer but he only could admire you and your features. He felt like he only saw women like you in paintings that he admired from afar. He saw many people in his life, all colors, sizes, nationalities, ethnicity, personalities, yet he felt like no one could compare to you. Someone he just met.

Sure, he heard countless stories about you through Felix, he saw your pictures with him and through him, but seeing you in person was so much different. Hearing your sweet voice, the way you spoke with everyone with such care and love even though you just met. The way you'd throw your head back and laugh loudly without being afraid of being too much and how your eyes would disappear under your chubby cheeks whenever you laughed or smiled too hard.

He was mesmerized by how you were effortlessly wonderful without even trying. He became instantly enamored by you.

You cocked your head to the side and raised an eyebrow, curious at his silence. "If you're not gonna say anything I'll go back to the living room with the rest"

"NO!" His eyes went wide and he almost screamed before he could hold himself. His cheeks burned red. "I mean… I wanted your company" he confessed and you thought it was cute even though you still didn't get why.

The silence fell again upon you two as he watched something in the horizon and you watched him. He was odd, in a good way. You could get used to him.

⛧°。 ⋆༺☆༻⋆。 °⛧

As the weeks passed by, more you'd find yourself in Felix and Seungmin's dorm because it was easier - and safer - than for them going to your tiny one room apartment. You even got your own credential to get into JYPE building so you could take food, coffee and other things for the boys whenever they needed and you could.

You got really close with the rest of the members, especially Seungmin, since he was Felix's roommate. But also you felt yourself always getting drawn towards Minho and his alluring aura.

You two started to speak more with each other. Trivial things at the start, just like Felix, you'd send him videos you thought he'd like, about himself or the members or cats. Then you evolved into talking about his cats, he'd send you almost daily updates about his furry children and you'd provide him with plenty of cute reaction pictures and rates (always 10/10) for his cats. Then the next level had you two sharing thoughts about your lives and jobs, happiness and struggles, what you enjoyed and what you didn't. You'd always report your day to him, it became an habit that neither of you would complain, you liked to yap and he loved to listen to your voice notes with your extremely cute broken Korean.

You don't remember at what point that you exchanged your phone numbers but you don't regret one bit.

It was an off day for you, a well deserved rest after working for a while back to back with barely no pause or weekends, so you decided to surprise your boys with homemade meals and brand new coffee since they were recording for their next comeback.

You woke up early and started to prepare the food. It wasn't anything fancy but enough to fill their stomachs and make them feel renewed. You separated everything inside separated pots for each one of them and putting the salads and side dishes on different ones so they wouldn't get mushy and soggy by the heat of the food.

You put everything inside your thermal bag and called a cab to the company building. Before going up, you passed by the coffee and grabbed their usual.

The staff already knew your face at that point, greeting you with a smile once you bowed, waved and smiled happily at them. You remember one of the securities of the building saying to you once that, besides other staff and a few idols, you were the kindest with them. That made you happy to know and since then, whenever you can, you take them something as well. Even if it's just a candy.

Besides the supposed sound proof-ness of the studio, you could hear their reverberating laughs from down the hall. You recognized Changbin's and Felix's laughs as you got closer and you smiled at that. At least they seemed to be having fun.

You knocked on the door before opening slowly. Your body barely entered the room before you were engulfed by a hug and excited screams of noona entered your ears.

"I didn't know you were coming" Felix beamed at you, arms wrapped around your waist and face buried in your chest. You smiled and ruffled his hair.

"I decided to surprise you guys. I brought you lunch and coffee" you raised the bags in your hands and more happy screams and chirps were heard, hands that you couldn't distinguish from who it was, taking them from you.

"Thank you so much, yn" Chan thanked you from his chair, before turning his attention back to the infamous laptop in front of him.

The boys distributed their drinks and set the food aside for later. You sat at the couch as you watched them going back to their usual creative mess.

Member by member going in and out of the booth to record their part, more laughs flying whenever someone would mess up their part and screams and claps when they aced.

You smiled all the way through watching them. It was incredible how you grew fondly of those boys and how they let you in into their wild life.

You felt the seat beside you dip and you smiled at Minho as he sat by your side, close, knees almost touching, his heat and citrusy floral scent invading your senses and making your cheeks heat at the proximity. You ignored him for a while as you kept watching the other guys and he was scrolling on his phone.

You couldn't quite notice, not because you didn't want to, but because you were too absorbed in whatever absurdity Han and Hyunjin had said that made you laugh out loud, but the boy's eyes were trained on you. Almost dancing on his cavities as he looked from his phone to you then back to his phone so he could pretend he wasn't watching you with a smile.

He wasn't smiling because of the sound of your laugh that he grew to love oh so dearly. Or because you were already part of that ecosystem that he called a group. Or from how your chest would rise and fall rhythmically from your laugh. Or how your voice was so so sweet whenever talking to them, sugarcoated with a care that he was not used to see someone else beside their loved ones to lay on them.

Minho sighed deeply trying to released the tight knot in his heart. He couldn't feel this. He shouldn't feel this.

From the corner of the room, Felix watched both of your reactions to each other. To say he was amused by his hyung actions was understanding. He never saw the boy demonstrating romantic feelings towards someone else, every time someone approached him to ask for his number or Instagram he just denied coldly. Yet there he was, barely holding himself together by your side.

It was much easier to interact behind a screen, you could hide your true reactions and face expressions from the counterpart. All the hours you two spent sending messages and exchanging voice notes seemed worthless when you met face to face.

You wanted to talk to him, you really did, but you felt your hands get clammy and your heart jump from your ribs whenever you looked at him. You'd smile, he'd smile back and you two would turn your heads away again.

The whole afternoon was like that, while you were having the time of your life with the other seven, you didn't seem to have the same courage to interact with Minho like that.

And that obviously didn't go unnoticed by the boys.

"I should get going, boys" you said at some point, you didn't know what time it was, the studio didn't have windows and you barely looked at your phone while there. "It's probably too late and I already messed your recording schedule enough" you smiled and grabbed your purse and thermal bag.

"Are you sure you don't want to stay for dinner with us?" Seungmin asked and you denied with a soft smile.

"I already stayed enough for the day, you must be tired of me yapping in your ears already" you chuckled and gripped the strap on your shoulder.

"You know we never get tired of you, noona" Jeongin replied, his perfect smile on display.

Felix came to give you a hug before you could leave. "Tell me when you get home safely, ok?" You nodded and kissed his forehead.

"Don't worry, cupcake, I can take care of myself" you smiled and looked over his shoulder at Chan "don't overwork the boys, let them sleep enough and, please, go to sleep at a reasonable hour as well".

"Yes, ma'am" he gave a salute that made you shake your head before saying your last goodbye to the boys and leave through the door.

Everyone turned to look at Minho instantly, seven pair of eyes paying attention at the dancer that had his own still fixed to the door. "What?" His cheeks burned red.

"So, you and noona?" Felix held a smirk on his lips as he crossed his arms under his chest and watched his friend. If it was possible he became even redder.

"What's wrong?"

"You tell us" Jisung intervened, a cheeky smile dancing on his lips as he held his face on his hands, elbows propped on his knees. "You two could barely look at each other"

"I could feel the tension from inside the booth" Changbin chimed in.

"Y-you guys are seeing things. There's nothing going on, I don't like her"

"We never said you liked her" Chan smiled almost as if he caught his member red handed.

Lee Know hid his face on his hands, a low groan coming deep from his throat. Was it that visible? Was him that readable? He felt a knot in his stomach but this time from shame. He didn't know why he felt that way but he couldn't help it.

"There's nothing wrong in having feelings for someone, you know that, right?" Chan commented sitting by the man's side and putting a comforting hand on his shoulder. "Especially if that someone is someone like yn" that grabbed Minho's attention that turned to look at his hyung with a puzzled look. Chan sighed. "I know it's scary to like someone, to fall in love, especially in our job, but being in love is natural and something everyone should be able to experience"

"And yn is an amazing and understanding person" Felix complemented. "She's been through a lot herself, I'm sure she'll understand anything you bring to the table"

"What if she doesn't like me the way I do? I mean, what if she rejects me?" His members laughed, actually laughed at his concern.

"Dude, you really don't know how to read the room" jeongin shook his head. "She hardly looked at you the entire evening"

"If you exchanged half dozen words it was a lot" Hyunjin mused.

"Not to mention how she'd smile every time she'd look at you before turning her head back forwards and fidget with fingers" Seungmin smiled at the thought.

"It's really cute though" Jisung added.

"Have you guys talked? Besides whenever you'd meet at my dorm?" Felix inquired and Minho blushed even hardly and nodded.

"We actually have been texting each other everyday"

"WHAT?" A chorus of the seven men asked loudly at the same time. Incredulously.

"What do you mean texting everyday?" Minho liked the spotlight, but definitely not this one.

"Well, we started sending videos to each other and then talking about the cats and quickly we became comfortable with each other and started to talk everyday"

Felix held his temples as he shook his head in denial. "So every time you'd meet and would barely talk to each other, you had already been talking through your phones?" Minho nodded slowly and just then he noticed how silly it all sounded and how much he looked like a wimp. "I swear to god and everything that is sacred you two deserve each other" the blonde huffed and almost threw himself in a chair.

There was silence for a moment, everyone looking at the dancer and he was feeling the weight of their stare. Judging, pitiful, mocking. Even if it was in his head, that's how he felt his members were looking at him.

Yes, he surely liked you, there was no doubt in that. How could he not. You were wonderful, funny, smart, caring and so so pretty. Every time you smiled, he'd instinctively smile together. He felt like he could listen you talk about literally anything just so he could hear your voice. And when it was something that you enjoyed it was extra special because you'd get excited and yap non stop with so much passion that he could only hope you'd talk about him like that one day.

The more he thought about it, more Minho realized he was deeply in love with you. But it was scary. He never felt like this for anyone else. Not even once. Sure, he had crushes, he's a human being after all, but he always pushed aside with the excuse of his career. But now? It was devastating. He couldn't control it. You entered in his life easily, slowly, smoothly. You took a space he never thought he had. But he wasn't mad. He couldn't be. Not at you.

But did you really like him? Wasn't it all just his friends imagination? He didn't want to risk it lose the friendship he built over the past few weeks. He rather see you happy by the sideline than losing you.

"Maybe we should get back at recording, eh?" Chan finally spoke, trying to take the attention away from his friend and letting him think.

The boys went back to their activities while Minho stood quiet in the couch.

⛧°。 ⋆༺☆༻⋆。 °⛧

The hues of pink, yellow and orange painted the sky as the sun set in the horizon and you watched it from the small balcony at your apartment. You loved the stillness of the transition between day to night, when the sky was splashed with the prettiest colors and the moon was already high, sharing the vastness with the sun. Even if just for a few moments.

It's been a couple of days after you went to the studio and since then you noticed that Minho started to talk less to you. He wouldn't reply quickly as always and he'd always say that he was busy with the comeback - which you believed - and that he'd talk to you later, but he'd never would.

You started to enter your head a little, wondering if you did or said something that had scared him away. Did he noticed that you liked him and he didn't like you that way? So he decided it would be better if he distanced himself not to lead you to anything? It wouldn't surprise you. It wouldn't be the first time and, after all, you are you. And he's an international superstar.

Your head hung low as you sighed at the thought. You hated feeling this. Putting yourself down and diminish yourself. But you couldn't help. It came so naturally to you.

The squeaky and creaking noise from the old door of your apartment took you out of your thoughts and you turned to look at the only person that could had entered. You met a smiley Felix with arms and hands full of bags.

"I went grocery shopping for you" he dropped the bags on your table as you walked towards the boy.

"How many times have I told you not to do that? I can buy my own food, mister" you greeted your brother with a warm hug and a kiss on the crown of his head, his sweet shampoo invading your nostrils.

"I know. I know. But I like it, it's like giving you gifts" he chuckled as you rummaged through the many bags spying what he had bought. He knew exactly what you liked.

You two started to put the groceries on their respective places, conversation about their upcoming comeback and your work flowing as the last item was stored.

You had just baked a cake the day prior so you cut a piece for the boy and yourself and sat at the small round table. He hummed at the taste, making you chuckle.

"So, noona" he started, fork playing with a few crumbs on the plate. "By any chance are you interested in anyone at the moment?" He watched you through his eyelashes, almost innocently if you didn't know him better.

"Why the sudden question?" You raised an eyebrow at him, arms crossing on top of the table.

"Oh no, nothing in particular. It's just because, maybe, just saying, maybe I know someone that might like you and I wanted to know um if you perhaps liked him back" his voice was almost a whisper.

You were caught off guard. Was he talking about who you thought he was? Oh you hoped so. Yet your heart was clenching that it wasn't him. That irrational fear that always ate you inside whenever you liked someone. They won't like you back, yn. You're not enough.

"And who this someone might be? That is if I'm allowed to know" you asked, slowly, careful.

"I think you already know who I'm talking about" he leaned toward you on the table. "And I think you like him back" you felt your cheeks and ears burn and he smirked at your sheepish reaction. "By the way, we all noticed you two that day at the studio"

"What do you mean?" You panicked a little, you were caught. Did he noticed too?

"Oh come on, noona! You two could barely stand next to each other let alone look at each other. It was rather cute though" he smiled amused. "And when you weren't looking, he was watching you, big smile in his face"

"Was he?" You smiled at the thought without noticing. Felix smiled back.

"Mhm. And when you looked at him his ears would burn bright red" you chuckled and nodded. You had noticed that too. "Only a fool could deny that he hasn't feelings for you, noona"

You looked at your fingers, the purple nail polish starting to chip at the tip. You sighed and fidgeted with them, pulling the layer of polish from the nails.

"What's wrong?" Your younger brother asked and pulled his chair to your side.

"It's just… I am a little scared, you know? Have you looked at him? He's just so gorgeous and talented, he can sing and dance, and he's so kind and sweet even though he doesn't show that often. He has hundreds of thousands of people screaming for him everyday. And what do I have to offer? Who am I compared to him?" You took a deep breath and looked at the boy. "All I am saying is that he's him and I'm just little old me"

"And what's wrong with little old you?" You didn't answer, if you started you'd spiral down that self deprecating rabbit hole that you avoided so much. "Do you wanna know what he said about you after you left?"

"You guys talked about me?" Your eyes widened and the boy chuckled.

"He had the same doubts about your feelings for him. He didn't feel like you liked him back" you smiled softly at the idea of someone like Minho not having his feelings reciprocated. How could someone do that? "Honestly, you two are a match made in heaven" he laughed, "both too dense to realize each other's feelings, have been talking every day through a screen but can even look at one another in real life and not to mention that you both are exceptional people that constantly doubt yourselves. So please, do something" you laughed at how stressed your friend looked.

He was right. You hated to admit it but he was right. Even if your insecurities ate you inside every second, what you developed for Minho was much bigger,

You ruffled the blonde's hair and hugged him by the side. "Thank you, cupcake. For everything" he hugged you back. "It's been pretty lonely here and if it wasn't for you and the boys I don't know if I'd have endured it" you confessed.

"You are an incredible person, noona and I feel so sorry for people who can't see that. It's their lost that they don't have a friend like you" you smiled at his words. "I know it won't always be easy, it never is for anyone, but remember that me and the boys are always here. Well, except when we are on tour and stuff, then we won't be literally here but we have phones and you can text and call us so we can be with you" you laughed and nodded.

"And I'm always here for you and the boys too, online and offline" he beamed and hugged you again.

You two continued hugging for a while, sharing warmth and enjoying each other's company.

"When will you talk to Minho hyung?" He broke the silence and you chuckled.

"Soon".

⛧°。 ⋆༺☆༻⋆。 °⛧

Three weeks. Exact three weeks had passed since your talk with Felix. Your conversations with Minho had shortened, you stopped messaging him after a while of him not responding you back or just giving excuses. You knew he was busy but also afraid. Yet, he kept giving mixed signals. Did he liked you or not?

Your head was a mess and to help, your job was even worse. You were assigned a project to develop with a team of other 4 coworkers. You weren't happy, but you weren't unhappy either. You just didn't have any expectations of what was going to happen.

But nothing prepared you for what came.

The four people, three Koreans and one foreigner, teamed against you, purposefully leaving you out of the meetings and conversations about the project. Project that you were supposed to do with them.

When you tried to speak with your foreigner coworker, hoping that he'd listen to you and help you, the man simply laughed at your face and said all the worst things you'd never imagine a teammate telling you.

That day you left work earlier, not caring about your boss' complains and went home to cry, stuff your face with food, alcohol and cry.

You ordered the spiciest fried chicken you could handle and bought two bottles of wine, hoping to drown them by the end of the night. The wide screen in front of you played a reprise of some silly stupid rom-com that you don't even remember putting on but wasn't complaining, it provided you company.

Yes, you could call Felix and talk with him, or even your family or friends back home even though it would probably be some hour between late night and early morning, you didn't even know anymore, lost track of time. But you hated being an annoyance, the bearer of bad news and sad stories. You wanted them to believe you were happy and fulfilled.

You wanted yourself to believe that.

Your eyes watered at the image in front of you on the TV, the couple looked so happy. Why couldn't you be happy? Didn't you deserve it?

The dam broke and soon you were crying on top of your glass of wine, surely some drops had fallen into the red liquid but you didn't care. Not at that moment. You questioned every decision you ever made in your life. Was it worth it? Moving all the way here to be harassed and disdained? It's not like you couldn't get a job nowhere else. So why you ended up here?

You always liked to think that destiny was already traced and every decision made, no matter big or small, led us to the same path. The only thing that would change would be the way things would act out. Easy or hard. Simple or difficult. Fast or slow. So why your destiny brought you to suffer in Seoul?

You threw your head back into the couch seat as you were sitting in the ground. "What am I doing here?" You mumbled to yourself before groaning and throwing a little fit as if you were a kid whose got their candy taken away.

The silence invaded the room as you quieted yourself and the movie ended, the credits have rolled a while a go. The only sound was the mixed buzzing of the old yellow lamp on your ceiling and the plethora of cars driving back and forth on the streets floors beneath you.

A deep sigh left your lips as you finally decided to clean the mess and go to sleep, not wanting to even drink anymore halfway through the first bottle.

The last dish was put in the dish rack to dry when the doorbell rang. That annoying too loud of a sound for the time making you crease your brows. Slowly, you dragged your feet over to the door, not bothering to check who it was on the peep hole before opening.

You were met with a rather distressed looking Minho. He looked like he was running, chest heaving, breathing heavy and fast, hair disheveled and a bit damp with sweat, and cheeks tinted with a heavy warm shade of pink. That or he came straight from the practice. Knowing the boy it was probably the latter.

Your eyes met each other and silence fell heavy between you two, weighing on your shoulders.

The boy could see the distress in your face, eyes deep and heavy, bags dark under your eyes, your usually bright and shiny demeanor now dull and gray, as if a rainy cloud hovered over your head. Your posture was slumped forward, as if you carried the weight of the world on your shoulders. Alone.

He didn't know what to say. Or how to start. To be honest, he didn't even know why he was at the door of your apartment. All he knew was that he missed you and finally seeing you after so long just proved him that.

Still with no words, you moved to the side in a motion for him to enter your apartment. He took of his sneakers and didn't even bother to put slippers on, he just walked to the middle of your living room. Silently.

You moved to the kitchen and grabbed a bottle of water for the boy and offered it. Minho took it from you, fingers purposefully grazing yours on the way and making a shiver run from your head down your spine and a warmth creep up to your cheeks.

Gesturing to the same couch you were crying on earlier, you both sat together. Afar but still close enough to radiate warmth and whatever energy that was bouncing between you two.

The silence was loud, heavy and filled with unspoken words that neither of you felt like saying it first. The darkness of the night coming from your window and embracing the stillness.

Minho's eyes were glued to the plastic bottle in front of him, the droplets of the condensation seemingly more interesting than anything he could ever think of. Yours were dancing between your fingertips to his.

How did you become strangers again?

The boy sighed profoundly, his shoulders going up before coming down again. His head slowly turned towards you yet his eyes looked anywhere but you. "How… how have you been?" His voice was low, lower than he intended, soft and carried the weight of a mistake. You just didn't know which one.

"Surviving" you replied, turning to look at him finally. No eyes were met. "How about you?"

He finally turned to look into your eyes and you noticed how shiny his own looked. "The same" he managed, words rough and getting caught in his dry throat. He wanted to cry.

Minho took a sip from the water and looked to the other side, watching the darkness from the night sky outside the open window.

You sighed. "I don't know what is the same, it's been a while we don't talk" you managed to let it out, harsher than expected, too many feelings being felt.

He turned to look at you fast, he knew he messed up. He just didn't know how much.

"" he whispered.

"For what?"

"For…" silence again. What was he apologizing for specifically? For ghosting you? For disappearing? For being afraid of his own feelings? And yours? For being afraid of the future? Of rejection? For… "everything" he answered. Truthfully.

"You don't have to apologize, you know that, right? You haven't done anything wrong" you chuckled trying to ease the tension but he kept his serious watch on you.

"I disappeared" his voice was barely a whisper, soft yet rough with something unnamed around the edges.

"You were busy"

"I could have made time for you, like I always did"

"But you don't have to"

"But I wanted to"

"And what stopped you?"

Silence again. Now his whole body was turned towards yours. His full attention on you. You felt locked in place. No scape. Hunter and prey.

Minho smirked a little, just a tug at the corner of his lips, but still noticeable. "Me"

The answer was simple, a single word, yet you knew everything he meant to say by it, because deep down you two were very similar. Much more than you cared to admit.

He moved closer to you, just a bit, just to make your knees touch and his smell - that citrusy floral perfume mixed with his sweat - to invade your personal space. It was enough to make your breath hitch and your heart speed up.

"I've been avoiding this for far too long now" the boy started and you listened, "lying to myself and saying that I don't need it. I'm fine. I can do it on my own. That there are things that are far more important than this, that this is just a societal expectation" he chuckled and looked down, fidgeting with the fabric of his sweatpants. "But then something shifted. Something happened. You happened".

Oh.

He looked at you again with regained confidence and you thanked for being sat, otherwise you'd fell from how weak your legs felt from the look he gave you.

"Everyday I woke up waiting for your text. God! Some days I couldn't even wait, I'd send it first like a loser teenager" you laughed softly at his confession. "Because that's how I've been feeling with you, yn, like a teenager all over again. You make my stomach flip whenever you'd send a message and make me smile like a lunatic when you sent your long voice messages ranting about your job just because I'd get to listen to your voice for a few minutes" the heat that crept to your cheeks was almost unbearable. You bit the inside of your cheek to prevent you from smiling too much. "I know I'm not the best at communicating but…" he cut himself and took a deep breath in.

Before he could say something, anything, you leaned forward and joined your lips. Quick and gentle.

"I like you, Minho" you confessed through your burning cheeks. "A lot".

The boy smiled and nodded, still a little taken aback by your sudden "attack". When he finally locked in and realized what had just happened he widened his eyes and touched his lips with the tip of his fingers, earning a low chuckle from you. He was so endearing.

Lee Know smiled widely before pulling you against him by your neck and clashing your lips together again. You whined surprised at his action but quickly reciprocated the action.

His kiss was slow, gentle, a kiss that only someone who yearned for could give. His hand kept holding your neck, tangling in the hair on the place, while the other circled your waist and brought you close to his body, making chests meet. Yours, however, held his arms, feeling the flexing of his muscles whenever he'd move or hold you.

You were melting against him. There was no other way to describe how you were feeling. Your mouths were molded for each other and the way he led you through the kiss was absolutely devastating.

There was so much being spilled into that kiss. The feelings, the yearning, the desire, the sensations. the feeling of finally being together and pouring out your feelings.

It was overwhelming in a good way. And you didn't want to stop.

Minho broke the kiss with small pecks, almost as if he didn't want to stop or he didn't believe it was real. He joined your foreheads together, gazes meeting with an intensity indescribable. He smiled, widely, ear to ear, and kissed the tip of your nose.

"I like you too. A lot" he repeated your words and you nodded, smile as big as his. "Fuck, I can't even start to describe how much I like you"

"Don't worry" you pecked his lips quickly again, "I could feel it through your lips"

He threw himself against the couch with a laugh that was borderline maniac yet still cute. "Don't say things like that" he came back to his prior position, cradling your face between his two hands, "you're already too cute for your own good" you chuckled and earned a quick kiss, sighing against his lips. "I think I won't ever let you leave this house again. No, better, I won't let you leave my side again"

"That, my good sir, is something I won't complain about" you smiled and kissed him again.

The two of you spent the rest of the night kissing and enjoying being together at last, and, at some point, ended up cuddling in your couch, his arm around your shoulder and gently caressing the soft plush skin of your arm, your head on his shoulder and your hands holding his other one on your lap.

You enjoyed each other's company while you talked about the last weeks and what you had missed in the other's life. He told you how he was messing up at the practice more often because he couldn't take you from his head. Even though you were worried, you thought it was cute. But you'd never admit it out loud to him. At least not for now.

You lifted your head to look at him and found him already looking at you with sparkly eyes.

"I'm happy" he assumed, his hand that was on your lap leaving it to gently pet your head, putting a strand of your hair behind your ear. "I couldn't be happier" you nodded, closing your eyes as you felt his lips on yours.

"I couldn't be happier too, Minho" the smile on your lips couldn't get any bigger.

"I promise you, I'll make you even happier"

"Only if you allow me to make you happier too".

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