Takes on the upperclassmen all tend to be terrible tbh, especially the ones on how they treat Andrew and Kevin. ESPECAILLY when ppl try to link it to how they treat Neil and say something like "How could they treat Andrew/Kevin like they do when they treat Neil nicely and Neil is similar to Kevin/Andrew."
And it's like. They like Neil. He is their friend. He makes an active effort with them. Kevin/Andrew don't. They're not their friends.
Neil's similarities to Andrew & Kevin in this instance don't really matter. The upperclassmen largely don't like Andrew because of his violent behaviour, which Neil never displays violence towards any member of the upperclassmen. He mostly hits Riko, who they don't like. They largely don't like Kevin because he's overly critical of them, which Neil never is.
The one that annoys me the most is ppl complaining about the upperclassmen having more sympathy for Neil after his stay at evermore than they did for Kevin, who had been there for years. Neil didn't come back from the Nest behaving like Kevin! He didn't come back criticising them or have any air of superiority above them. Obviously, they don't react the same.
I never for even a second believe anyone who claims they would react any differently. They don't imagine themselves from the perspective of the upperclassmen. I know this because when people claim they would behave differently they'll say things like "How could the upperclassmen think Andrew is a monster when he made a deal with Aaron because he didn't want to lose his brother?" or whatever. Basically, "How could the upperclassmen think Andrew is a monster when he [did some shit the upperclassmen don't know about]?"
They think from the perspective of omniscient readers, with the added luxury of time to reflect. Same thing with Kevin. As far as the upperclassmen know, Andrew is just some guy who almost never speaks to them, when he does he's usually threatening one of them and he's never nice to them, and he occasionally physically harms one of their friends. Kevin is just some guy who also almost never speaks to them, when he does its not nice, and spends most of the time he does speak to them insulting them.
I'm not saying Neil's some angel. He's not. And I'm not saying Kevin & Andrew are evil. They're not. I'm just saying, from the upperclassmens perspective, it makes complete sense to react like they did. I see so many posts complaining, "How could the upperclassmen treat them that way?" Maybe ask yourself, "How could they treat the upperclassmen that way?"
"How could they not listen to Kevin talk about history? Why do they treat him differently from Neil?" Why doesn't he listen to them talk about something they're interested in? Why doesn't he listen to them talk about their lives like Neil did? Or sit with the girls while they talk about planning charity events like Neil did? Or watch movies with Matt and Seth like Neil did?
"Why couldn't they be more understanding towards Andrew? Why do they judge him so much?" Why doesn't Andrew be more understanding towards them? Why doesn't he try not judging them? Why doesn't he try not hitting or threatening them & their friends? Why doesn't he talk to them?
Again, my point isn't that they're all bad or they're all good. Just that, compassion, friendship, understanding, loyalty... you need to show it to recieve it.
It might sound harsh, but I think a lot of people tend to relate to and see themselves more in the likes of Kevin and Andrew than they do in the upperclassmen. So, sometimes people get hurt when they see these characters being treated badly or judged. And it can hurt even more to see someone in the fandom say, "These characters, who you may see as similar to yourself, aren't entitled to endless sympathy from everybody simply because they've been hurt by others in the past or because their actions are ultimately the result of trauma."
AGAIN, because I know some ppl will get mad. I'm not saying Neil is perfect. Yes, he put them in potential danger from his father. No, this doesn't affect how they treat him because they didn't know about this fact until they weren't in danger anymore, and by that point, they loved Neil enough to endure danger for him anyway. Yes, he wasn't forthcoming with them about a lot of things. But, he told them enough to offer trueful pieces of themselves, to allow them to be his friend (and vice versa). The Foxes also have a mutual understanding that they're not entitled to every detail of each others lives, which explains why Neil got away with being so secretive without judgement from them.
What I'm getting from most of these hot takes/asks is that the fandom seems to have a problem with differentiating fanon and canon, and then arguing about it.
The upperclassmen and the monsters aren't friends. Kevin, Andrew, and I'm going to add Aaron don't care if they are liked by the upperclassmen. I'm sure their opinions mean absolutely nothing to them. I guess I've never seen people coming to defend Kevin and Andrew from the upperclassmen's judgment, that's wild to me.
I don't have a lot to add because you already spelled things out in great detail, and it's kinda crazy to me that people feel the need to defend the monsters.