#mel whines

[grumpycakes]

As my siblings get confirmations of also having adhd (mom and us daughters all have it) it’s been nice to commiserate

But one thing that’s been messing w me is how my mother and siblings keep saying “well when you had one kid that was SO CLEARLY adhd the others seemed fine”

And as the kid who was SO CLEARLY adhd and the one they treated like a bull in a china shop and a emotional bomb, annoying, hangry etc. it’s like,

ah, noted

I was the little annoyance of the family

Thanks for confirming

(And I’m sure that’s not what my sisters mean, but it’s hard not to hear it that way from them when they say it over and over and over.)

Anyway

[thevampirecat]

So last night my husband and I went to a gig. There was an older dude standing in front of us. He wasn't very tall (although taller than me) but he was very beefy, very drunk, and to say he was enjoying the show was an understatement. He was singing, he was dancing, he was playing air guitar, he was trying to get random people to do the actions to the songs, and that's great. Honestly, I'll take that any day over the obnoxious dudebros that climb out of the woodwork and pick fights or heckle or contravene the smoking policies.

But I noticed something about this dude that I have now realised is just a thing at gigs. He would dance, not realise how big he is or that there are other people there and end up knocking me or elbowing me or walking into me and my husband. This isn't something that upsets me hugely (when it's not sore) because these gigs are always packed and I expect a couple of accidents like this. But when it does happen, I would put my hands up just to shield myself, not even to push, but just so that I didn't get an elbow in my face or boobs or whatever, and of course dancing man would feel this and realise he'd collided with me or walked into me so he'd turn around and see me standing there, AND THEN APOLOGISE TO MY HUSBAND.

Later on he held out his hand, asking me to dance and I shook my head, but he didn't take his hand away and kind of did this sad "awwww, please" thing and my husband stepped between us and shook his head and drunk dancing dude seemed to realise/remember that "Oh, this lady has her a man friend" and then was all "Oh sorry dude" to my husband again before he carried on dancing alone.

And I mean I know where this bullshit comes from but I did realise it's something that happens a lot in these places. Because apparently it's more important to apologise to my master and keeper in case he's upset that you touched his property than it is just to say sorry to me for the actual faux pas.

[grumpycakes]

-Lays down- I got a refurbished iPhone 8 in like idk 2023 cause it still had a button/fingerprint instead of Face ID only. But I forgot that tech shit doesn’t let you update past a certain operating system after 10/15 years.

So now I’m having apps that won’t update and won’t work. Meaning I have to get a new (to me) phone

And updating to an iPhone would be easy but I hate the new styles.

While updating to an android seems like a fucking hassle but would still give me fingerprint

But my computer and tablet are apple bs so it worry’s me that it won’t be as seemless.

Idk, guess I’m asking for opinions if you want to share

(Will not get a google fone)

[grumpycakes]

My toxic brain pattern rn is thinking the ads are worse and more constant cause of the current US administration. Cause google knows they’re under the least scrutiny and is happy to make money.

Also found out that on iOS your website app/browser can’t have add ons/extensions. So I can’t even get ad blockers

Anyway. I hate it here. And this isn’t even the worst thing happening

[grumpycakes]

I took my meds today. I’ve been good and consistent w them. Why am I so fucking anxious and stressed out still.

(I know why. The world is falling apart and I feel like I can’t do anything while my life continues to March on)

Just having a stressy struggle day

[grumpycakes]

:(

So i'm a weirdo and have weird specific likes in tech. Specifically wireless earbuds

i will not

pay over 50 bucks

get the ones with those stupid ass dongles off of them (sensory)

get large ones cause they make my ears ache

This has led to me living with two types of earbuds

iLuv - TB200 (best fit for my ear, honestly decent sound quality, used to be 20, could be found under 40 in 2023)

BackBeat - Tempo 30 (better sound quality, okay ear fit - falls out easily if i'm chewing or doing things, closer to 40/50 bucks if not on some sort of sale)

THE PROBLEM HERE is that

the BackBay Tempo 30s have been constantly selling for 45-50 and I just can't spend like that

iLuv APPEARS to have discontinued their TB200 line (and maybe isn't making earbuds at all anymore???)

All other brands DO NOT make the shape I need for my ears and sensory issues.

I lose earbuds on the reg (usually in my car and or house) so having multiple pairs saves me until i can find the missing ones. AND YES maybe I have enough missing I was hoping to just get a new pair.

I sporadically search for any news on if iLuv will bring back the TB200s, but since they're not a mega name brand in sound they have none news about them. All i get are reddit posts where someone's like 'iluv SUCKS BALLS'

which like OKAY SURE but they're also not 70+ bucks so shut the hell up.

And when I try and look for other brands theyre either out of my price range, look way too big for my ear, or look crappier than iluv.

I wish iLuv just had a fucking statement on their website or something so I can give up the ghost.

[grumpycakes]

Anybody else been having the weird experience of realizing that you will die eventually and you will never know if we make it out of climate disaster? If we actually do space travel? If the world falls apart?

You realize that. That you’ll never see the year 2424. That your existence is so insignificant and you will never know the ending.

That you will have an ending and you have no idea what’s happening after. To humanity/earth. But also to you and your tiny little consciousness.

That there’s a time where you’ll cease to exist.

And then you can feel your teeth and taste metal and have to actively not let yourself hyperventilate?

CAUSE IVE BEEN HAVING THOSE FUN MOMENTS ABOUT 3-5 TIMES A WEEK. AND I FEEL LIKE IM LOSING MY MIND.

[grumpycakes]

Has anyone else noticed that the YouTube ads are SO AGGRESSIVE and unskipable right now??????

Cause like jfc. It’s every few minutes on some vids.

I know some are content creator placed but like??? It’s so constant?????

I hate it