Β° Λ β΄ in which you have .. an unusal pre-performance ritual.
### . STARRING β’ m.dn β fluff. + 0.9k // kissing, first kiss + reader is whipped Λ β§
π¨οΈ .. β XOXO β danielle save me danielle. same universe as te quiero hanni btw! might add more fics to the same univ w other members + [m.list]
being roped into the biggest event of your school β the festival that'd been on everyone's mind (but yours) for weeks now β had rather come as a surprise to you.
curse your pretty girlfriend, danielle, for misusing her obvious charm and influence on you. like you could have said no to those gorgeous eyes of hers.
βone of the comperes backed out last minuteβ, sheβd told you, βcould you please take her place? if there's anyone who can do it β itβs you.β
and, just like that, you had folded.
all your protests died on your lips as soon as she took your hand in both of hers and leaned in close, too close for comfort.
you felt like you could barely even think as a subtly alluring floral scent invaded your senses. messing with your head in the best way possible you barely realized youβd already given her your agreement when she excitedly giggled in that absolutely adorable way of hers and promised that the initiation ceremony would go absolutely perfect with you there <3.
so, with no way out, you allowed yourself to be swept up by rehearsals. your regret only kept building up in the remaining time upon finding out that you wouldn't actually get to spend any time with your girlfriend who had been your sole reason for saying yes.
finally, the morning of the much awaited event dawned.Β
β¦ and you realized just a tad bit too late that there was a problem.Β
correction : there was a huge problem.
usually, to keep any potential pre-show jitters (or even panic attacks, in extreme cases) at bay, it is rather common for people to develop different practices that they ensure doing before performances; as a placebo, if nothing else. some prefer to spend time all alone, drink a very specific type of soda, make use of good luck charms, even.Β
you just so happened to have one of these β¦ rituals. nothing too crazy. all you βneededβ for a smooth performance was a few minutes of mindless doomscrolling on any media platform that appealed to you at that moment. insta, twitter, hell β even youtube shorts had bangers occasionally. it calmed you. gave you a little dopamine boost to get through your nerves.
but the problem was that your phone was 1% away from dying on you.Β
and no one seemed to have a charger at hand.
trying to convince yourself that everything would work out fine, it's just a silly little ritual, after all β did not work in the slightest. not after the string of disasters in the early morning practice runs. youβd stumbled over your words. forgotten entire chunks of your lines. so, clearly, you were struggling.
but then, as if sent by heaven's angels themselves, a curly head of hair peeked in.Β
βdanielle, i..β youβd said, βi donβt think i can do this.β
she tilted her head, confusion, worry clearly flashing on her features as she asked why that was.Β
you wasted no time explaining β well, more like rambling β about your entire situation. your dying phone, your ritual and how you were convinced there was no way this entire thing wouldnβt crash and burn.
her brows knitted together as she pondered your theory all while you kept yapping and gesturing to make your point. and then, right before the cue for you to go on stage sounded, she stepped closer.Β
the warmth radiating off her almost made you dizzy, βdani? whatβre you-β
but before you could finish, sheβd grabbed your collar, leaned in and kissed you.
her lips against yours were more than anything you couldβve ever imagined. soft, sweet, βΒ until suddenly, before you could even process it much less savor the moment, she pulled away.Β
a quiet whisper left her which youβd barely even heard due to being too distracted by the fact that pressing in just a little closer would let you kiss her again.
βyou got this, okay?β
and with that, she was (gently) shoving you out of the wings and only when the stage lights focused on you were you able to snap back to reality.Β
βGreetings and welcome to one and all present here." you only vaguely register the words you're speaking, "Today we celebrate our prestigious schoolβs 20th anniversary with a variety of cultural showcases including β¦βΒ
she kissed you.Β
β... Additionally, I would like to welcome our chief guest, an alumni of our school from the batch of β96β¦β
that was your first kiss.Β
β... Lastly, I would like to invite the choir to present a mellifluous medley to kick off things after which the event will officially be declared open.β
and it was with danielle. your girlfriend. the prettiest girl in the world.
the kiss had definitely sent your brain short-circuiting.
but after having successfully finished up the opening speech, you realized with a jolt that it had been flawless. every word rolled out effortlessly, your nerves totally forgotten.
when you finally find yourself face to face with her again, had she been waiting backstage for you all this while?, you sternly try to confront her about it, hoping the heat rushing to your face doesnβt betray you, βmarsh danielle.β
βiβ¦ iβve heard kissing gives, like, dopamine?β she mumbles in her defense, her face just as flushed as yours despite the playful twinkle in her eyes.Β
thereβs nothing to be done (when the flowers bloom)
danielle x reader
angst
tw: death
some context: hanahaki disease is a disease where flowers grow in your lungs because your love is unrequited
a cough. itβs something that mo βsunshineβ danielle would usually never take notice of.
but itβs hard to not notice when you cough up a petal.Β
danielle stared at the petal. what was she going to do? her heartbeat pounded in her head.
βhey dani, come here!β her friend yelled.
swallowing her fear, she put on a smile and turned, βcoming!β, running to join her friends. she shouldnβt tell anyone, it would only burden them anyways.
danielle had loved yn since she first set eyes on her.Β
βhi! iβm yn! whatβs your name?β she had asked. her eyes shone at the thought of making a new friend.
11 year old danielle grinned. βiβm danielle but you can call me dani! wanna be friends?β
βokay!β yn had grinned.Β sheβs so pretty when she smiles, its like she lights up the whole room,Β danielle thought admiringly, before she hurried to catch up with yn as she went to play.
the day danielle realised she was in love was on ynβs birthday.Β
yn was surrounded by her friends, laughing as she unwrapped the presents, when suddenly the light hit her just right.
and in that moment, where everything was still and the sunlight shone through the glass panes of the window, was where danielle thought:
oh.
ββββββ
the days after that were the hardest. it was more tiring than she thought to ignore someone who she loved so much.
who loved her so much.
though, not in the way she wanted.
nevertheless, danielle continued pretending to not notice the steadily climbing number of missed notifications on her phone, but it kept weighing heavily on her mind. she was glad it was the weekend, but monday was looming closer, and it would be impossible to ignore yn at school.
she went to bed with a heavy heart.
ββββββ
the next day, she went into school looking like a mess, her hair half brushed, her clothes wrinkled, her socks mismatched.
in the hallway, she ran into the one person she wished she wouldnβt encounter.
βdani! hey! danielle!β
danielle kept on walking, resisting the urge to turn around. she knew she would cave if she saw ynβs face.
βdani!β a hand came to rest on her shoulder, and she spun around, their eyes meeting.
βwhat is it?β she said. it came out harsher than she expected.
βoh. iβm sorry if i bothered you.β yn muttered, her head bowed, her eyes downcast. βi just wanted to know, did i do something wrong?β
danielle felt a pang in her heart.Β itβs not fair on yn to ignore her,Β she thought.Β itβs best to suffer myself instead of hurting yn. she deserves better.
βitβs nothing, i just needed some time. sit with me at lunch?β
βof course!β
and that was that. life went on as usual, at least on the outside. until now.
yn was chatting excitedly about something, she could tell that much from her expression and the moving of her mouth, but danielle couldnβt hear anything except the ringing in her ears.Β
ynβs expression turned to a frown and she waved her hand in front of daniβs face.Β
βhello? earth to dani?β
danielle snapped out of her daze.
βhuh?β
βare you ok? you seem a bit out of iββ
the bell interrupted yn with its obnoxious ringing. she waved to yn as she rushed to her next lesson.
saved by the bell, she thought. if only the bell could save me from my fate.
she coughed up another petal on the way to chemistry.
ββββββ
at home, she gathered up the petals sheβs collected throughout the day. the array of flowers remind her of ynβ¦
yn.
her best friend, her shoulder to cry on, and the soon to be reason for her death. she would never know, of course, because she wouldnβt tell her, in fact, she wouldnβt tell anyone. after all, it was inevitable she would die eventually, and it wouldnβt do yn any good if everyone knew it was her who danielle had loved so much she had made her cough up petals.
she fell asleep on her desk, the petals stained by tears.
ββββββ
she didnβt go into school the next day.Β
βim not feeling well so i wont be in schoolΒ π€π€β, she had texted yn.
βCALL ME?!??β she had recieved as a response.
βi lost my voice so i cantππβ
she was a liar.
so?Β a voice in her head said.Β youβre going to die anyways.
might as well make the most of it.
ββββββ
it had only been a day and danielle had already coughed up an entire bud. the disease was spreading quicker than she had thought. there were only a few days now.Β
she picked up the phone to read the messages she had recieved she wasnβt surprised to see 74 unread messages from hanni. the latest one read: βim coming over.β
the doorbell rang.
danielle hurriedly shoved all of the flowers into a drawer, and rushed downstairs to greet hanni.
βdani! are you okay?β hanni asked worriedly as soon as the door swung open.
βiβm fine-β she was cut off by a cough. her hand closed around the petal, but not quick enough for hanni to miss the red colour between her fingers.
βis that?β
βits nothingβ¦β danielle replied curtly.
βitβs not nothing, give me that!β she snatched the crumpled petal fron danielle. it floated to the floor as hannis jaw dropped in shock, unable to comprehend the situation. βare youβ¦β
βcome in.β
hanni closed the door behind her and the two girls made their way up to danielleβs room. the silence was deafening, the tension thick enough to cut. the door to danielleβs room opened with a click.
βwhy didnβt you tell me?β hanni cried.Β
βi didnβt tell anyone.β
βthatβs worse!β hanni shouted. composing herself, she took a deep breath, and exhaled through her mouth. βwho is it?β
βhuh?β
βwho do you love?β
βiβ¦ canβt tell you.β
βwhy not?β
danielle had no answer.
βdaniβ¦ you donβt have to tell me if you donβt want butβ¦β
βitβs yn.β
hanni let out a breathy gasp as the words tumbled out of danielleβs mouth.Β
she should have known. the way danielleβs eyes creased a little more when yn was laughing too. the way she always clung to yn no matter what the situation.
βsince when-β
βyesterday. iβve already started coughing up buds.β deciding it was already too late to hide anything, danielle opened up the drawer and scooped up the flowers to show hanni.
βseeβ¦ hanni..?βΒ
hanniβs eyes were brimming with tears, and as she rushed forwards to hug danielle, they flowed, staining danielleβs t-shirt. words hung in the air between them.Β
iβll miss you. i love you. donβt leave me.Β
then, danielle started crying too. the two girls clung to each other as they sobbed, as if the world would collapse if they let go.
βi donβt want to die,β danielleβs lips were chapped, and she could taste salt in her mouth from her tears.Β
βplease,β it came out as a choked gasp. βplease, i donβt want to die!β her hands curled into balls as she clenched hanniβs sweater.
βshh,β hanni reassured her. βweβll,β she hiccuped. βweβll be okay.β the words were empty, but they brought danielle at least a little bit of comfort.
they sat together in silence while the blue sky turned golden and the sun receded to reveal the dark blue of the night sky.
thatβs how they woke up the next day too, jolting awake at the sound of danielleβs alarm.
they laughed together at their puffy eyes, and gossiped about people at their school while pressing cold spoons to their eyes, but it was still at the back of their minds, gnawing away at them.
it was funny how they could laugh like this, like two normal best friends, like their universe was still the same, like their reality wasnβt going to be altered in a few days.
or less.
ββββββ
danielle rushed to the bathroom, covering her mouth with her hand. she smothered another cough as she opened the door, gagging at the feel of petals in her throat. finally, she locked the door behind her and let all the buds out.
some of them were half opened.Β
frantically, she dialled hanni. her clammy hands fumbled with the phone until she pressed on hanniβs contact name. she swallowed the next round of flowers.
βhello? dani, are you there?β
hanni could only hear coughs in the background.
βdani? dani where are you? are you okay? dani?β
the lack of answer made her heart drop to her stomach.
ββββββ
danielle came to in a hospital bed, and gasped.
βdani? are you okay?β ynβs panicked voice filled her ears before she could open her eyes.
βiβm fine.β she replied, surpressing the urge to cough. βwhereβs hanni?β
βiβll go get her.β yn said. danielle couldnβt tell if she could make out a hint of jealousy or not.
she was probably going insane.
she lay there in the bed, with her thoughts to keep her company, until she could hear the pitter-patter of footsteps came closer to danielle and she could make out the sound of hanniβs voice and the door burst open.
βdani!β
suddenly, she couldnβt breathe. blood rushed to her head and her vision clouded, but she could still barely make out the shocked faces of hanni and yn.
oh, she thought.Β so this is it.
βyou take my breath away,β danielle had once told yn, who took it as a joke.
how ironic it was.
and as danielleβs lungs closed up, she smiled up at yn.
iβm glad i could be with you, that i could meet you, at least for a little while.
the heart monitor went flat.
yn sat down next to where danielleβs bed had been.
her hand reached up to cover her face as the uncontrollable coughing wracked her body.
in her palm, a sunflower.
her eyes closed.
danielle, iβll see you soon.
the rise and fall of ynβs chest stilled.
ive been writing this for like a month⦠HOW DO PEOPLE WRITE FICS THAT ARE SO LONG ????
