#murder puns

[anothergayghoul]

"Are they really made from cat guts?"

"Not always"

Literally on the same level as Hannibal with the sly acknowledgements of what he does

[fandomtransmandom]

Bill Hader: Murder Puns

[computer-bouquet]

you slice the ginger jfc

[we-didnt-playtest-this-at-all]

Nothing's stopping you from talking to bae. Except maybe the knife in your gut and the fact he hopped a plane to Europe.

Will Graham

[camiveo]

Ellie headcannon

Ellie is a person for puns like when she is murdering some non-innocent people as she cuts their skin open with a knife some people are oh so lucky to hear her puns before they die

For example:”So I said to my other victim,KNIFE to meet you and I stabbed them in the chest repeatedly”

“Mmmf!Mmmmf!”

-holding the victims-”"Are you laughing under that ducktape?I know I, very HUMERUS”

[puncromancer]

"I'm not a backstabber, you know that." you say as you stab your victim in the chest

"...how... how could you?"

"wow sorry dude, I was just trying to be upfront with you"

[nightgetsbrighter]

I really need for there to be an episode of Criminal Minds where there are 9 people who disappear because of some murderous event and are held captive then killed, but they only find 8 bodies and it’s just like “So if there were 9 victims, why were only 8 bodies recovered?” “Maybe…seven ate nine” *Theme song starts* And like, one of them was literally eaten. Please, I will direct it myself if I have to I just need it to happen.