~ALL MY LOVE AND PATIENCE~
Pairing: Sam Winchester X Nephilim! Reader (AFAB) Word count: 5,482 words. Warnings: None really, just yearning, no use of y/n, mentions of death and self loathing, mention of reader’s insecurities, happy ending. SPOILERS FOR S3-9 if you haven't caught up to those yet, and just some subtle descriptions of reader but nothing too specific Reader also has a second language (have fun with that) Summary: You’ve been in love with Sam for what seems like forever. If only he knew, but with everything you’ve seen him go through. It seems like the right time never comes and you don’t want to put your feelings on him in such vulnerable times. Notes: My first ever fanfic, inspired by Billie Eillish's “The Greatest”. (T_T) why is fic writing actually fun??
SIX YEARS AGO: Dean went to Hell.
Leaving you two with the aftermath of splattered blood, shards of broken glass, wrecked furniture, and an even more destroyed man. Sam had to be wrenched off of his brother’s cold and lifeless body. You felt for him, Jesus Christ you felt so bad for him, every heaving breath he took broke your heart further. You’ve never seen him so distraught and it hurts you in a way you never felt until you saw him break down for the first time that night. You had to fight him to let you drive the Impala in Dean's stead, those fucking puppy eyes filling with tears made you feel worse the moment you raised your voice at him. “Sam-for heaven’s sake I'll drive!” he shakes his head adamantly “Please, I want to drive, please-".He pleaded with you as you stood in front of the Impala, almost guarding him from getting near it. You wouldn’t budge, as much as it hurt to deny him his right to his brother’s spot.
“Get in the damn car, just not the driver's seat” you state with utmost authority. You nearly fold as his voice whines your name again. But you don’t move, knowing he’s too emotional and teary eyed to take the wheel. Who knows if he would crash the dang car (on purpose or on accident), but you don't tell him that’s why you won’t toss him the keys, he doesn't need you making his misery worse. When he finally caved after what felt like an hour, you let out a long sigh and muttered something in (language of your choice). God, he looked so small as he crawled into the backseat and curled in on himself.
You went back inside and carefully carried Dean’s body out to the car, putting him safely in the trunk before you drove off. Those dead eyes would haunt you for who knows how long. The charismatic and charming light lost to the Hellhound’s undying ferocity. You brushed your hand lightly over his eyelids, closing them forever and pushed the trunk closed. Every time you checked on the distraught Sam in the rearview mirror, his eyes got closer and closer to being as dead as Dean’s were. All red and puffy instead of bright and attentive, his tears staining his cheeks in never ending streams, sniffling with every minute that passed, momentarily breaking the quiet that fell over you two.
Driving in tense silence until you found a clearing no one would hopefully dig up for property long enough. You silently hope one day, maybe someone would come and pick the space as a foundation for their new home. That way, Sam could be in Dean’s presence again if he became a ghost. Hopeful dreaming you thought to yourself, he’s in Hell, there's no way his spirit could escape that place and haunt a home on Earth. You’re broken out of your thoughts as Sam’s hand grasps onto your wrist since you grasped the shovel you're going to dig Dean's grave with, unbeknownst to you, that shovel was once Dean’s for when they would salt and burn.
“Can I do this….” his shaky voice is not asking for permission, he’s demanding to be the one to bury Dean, and you do nothing but oblige. Watching helplessly as he buries his only living relative. Every time he stops to cry and curse at himself, Dean, the heavens, you feel your heart sink further. You can’t imagine what you’d be like if that was your sibling he was burying. You’d tear Hell open and kill every last demon until it was left with nothing but you as the victor. The deeper you go down that imaginary revenge escapade, the less you notice what Sam is doing. A pained yell of anger snaps you out of that train of thought, Sam's finished with burying his older brother, he’s now just beating the dirt up with the shovel like he was getting his vengeance on the hellhound itself. You immediately rush over to the grave to calm him down.
“SAM STOP! Hey! Hey! What the!?-” you fight the shovel out of his hands, it’s tough with his strengthened grief. He lets go after fighting you off initially, and he gives up, crashing into you. He’s sobbing harder than before and grasping tightly at the back of your jacket, since he’s much larger, he nearly knocks you over. The two of you wobble as you settle down on the dead grass beside the grave. You can feel yourself tense up as he continues to cry for his older brother, dammit. Stroking his back and shushing him, you hold him closer to you, apologizing for what happened, for not finding a way to keep the two of them together, and for whatever was causing him pain other than losing his brother. "it's alright, I'm sorry-I'm so sorry, I'm right here…".
You two leave the gravesite, but not without you giving it a small whispered prayer and a makeshift tombstone made of twigs and rope. You again are in the driver’s seat. It feels wrong, you’re supposed to be in the backseat, watching with amusement as the brothers once again fight over Dean’s choice in music, what they think the monster they’re hunting is, or even who the cute waitress at the diner was flirting with more. It feels wrong for Sam to be this quiet, this still, this…sad. He’s definitely going to be drinking his sorrows away and you can already see him thinking about it. Then you realize…shit…you two have to tell Bobby…
FIVE YEARS AGO: Ruby came back-so did Dean.
Before her return, you were trying so hard to keep Sam from self-destructing. His drinking habits worsened, so did his sleep. Sometimes he’d stay awake because the nightmares wouldn’t stop tormenting him every time he closed his eyes. His failed deal with the crossroads demon took the last hope of Dean ever coming back. Which made you even more determined, to be the one to care for the younger Winchester. You made it your mission.
You cautiously balanced on the line of friend and mother hen to Sam’s grieving. Making sure he was drinking water and not just bourbon and that he had food other than painkillers and salad. Staying awake with him as he slept, secretly using your grace to relieve him of nightmares the minute he scrunched his nose in discomfort and even remotely sounded scared or in pain. Weeks later, he was finally getting better, slowly and surely, he got back into hunting. After that came his first smile since Dean was taken from him, all because he compared you to Frodo from Lord of the Rings, sneaky, doe eyed, and tiny of course. That smile made your heart flutter and it imprinted itself into your brain that night. Uh oh…
Ruby had somehow come back and now was using a supposed Jane Doe's newly dead body. Geez, you liked her better when she was that blonde girl. Something felt different about her once you looked past that fact, she seemed…changed. Your grace told you it was definitely Ruby in that brunette’s body. But she was more determined with Sam than before, and that scared you. The two of you butted heads quite often. Silent glares, snide comments, and all that shit you thought you would never do as a middle schooler (yes, you went to school before learning to become a hunter, thank your mother). You were doing it all whether Sam noticed or not. Of course he'd be the one to get between you and scold you, telling you to knock it off.
Ruby knew you were crushing the minute you patched him up after a rather rough Tulpa hunt in the Midwest. Doing so with such care and affection in your eyes and soft smile. It made her confirm that you were definitely going to be in the way of her plans for Sam. She saw you as an obstacle, and she knew she had to snatch Sam up before you did. Sam was left oblivious, as the literal angel and devil on his shoulders were fighting over him and his usage of his growing powers.
Hell, it felt like holy oil had been lit ablaze on your soul when you came back from errands, to her on his lap, him obviously fighting temptation. You froze, observing his tense but yet intrigued body language, her wanton and sultry expression… oh hell no… he was feeling better but he was still vulnerable. “Ahem, uhm, sorry guys, uh…I got food” you broke the tension awkwardly, in a way that Sam wouldn’t see through as hurt jealousy. But Ruby did, whether you liked it or not, she made sure you knew as she passed you with that damn smirk on those dead lips of hers.
Then, Dean comes back from Hell somehow. What…the actual…shit… You nearly stumble back from the doorway as you see his back. You see Sam and Bobby with him, Sam has that light back, not the one he had when he successfully exorcised a demon with his powers, but that light he lost months ago. Which tells you everything you need to know, that and the dried water spots on his lapel (definitely holy water) as the alive and well Dean Winchester turns to you.
“Hey, you little- oof!”. His grin spreads wider as you rush him and hug him like you want to kill him yourself by strangulation. You pull back and curse him out in your language so he won’t understand that you're both grateful and upset at being last to know. You grill him while he just blocks every little hit and kick with a shit eating grin. When you’re done you hug him again, with more joy and heartfelt relief until realization hits you like a puff of smoke. “Dean you-wait….how’d you get out??” you feel like you know but somethings are better left unsaid.
THREE YEARS AGO: Sam came back without his soul
Once again, you could sense something was off the minute you were in his proximity again. But not with grace or your angelic powers (the boys are now aware of them after Uriel and Castiel visited). But because you knew him nearly as well as Dean. It was almost like a shifter was wearing that cheeky grin and kind eyes as a costume. But you could sense one if it was, what the fuck is going on with him?. But once Castiel revealed he had no soul, your world nearly caved in on itself. Sam was back, but the most important thing about him was still in the cage.
“Hey” his voice startled you despite being a Nephilim, all powerful and well trained to sense when someone’s sneaking up on you as a hunter. You turned and were met with his tanned body, top half bare, his jeans riding real low on his hips, exposing his V-line and waistband of his underwear. Like it was on purpose, and you could tell it was. He had that unapologetic fuckboy look that you hate so much. Especially on him, it doesn’t suit him the way he thinks it does, it feels so vile to you to witness.
“Yeah? What’s up?” you ask, acting nonchalant and ready to hear what he needs. He smirks with a little bob of his head, checking you out in a way that really should make your skin crawl because it's coming from him. “You’re not busy right?” he asks, way too calm and practiced as he slowly corners you against the wall behind you. “N-no…why?” you hate that he’s hot when he wants to be, that you’re so affected by it, but most of all, you despise that it’s not the Sam you want to be hitting on you so boldly. It’s a husk, a puppet of the man that you fell in love with, you adored, you cared for so deeply and still want. “Cuz, we have some time before Deano comes back and…” his eyes meet yours, you both know what he's entailing.
He slowly leans down staring at you, waiting for you to play into his hands. His eyes are hypnotizing to stare at despite yourself. You swallow thickly and press back against the wall like it would swallow you so you could escape through it to get away from Sam. Your eyes betray you as they look down at his body and back up. He smirks at the small glance, watching your lips part with uneven breathing and a shaken composure. Leaning in closer until he was breathing into your lips, making you heat up and squirm in your spot. Then, it hits you harder-this isn’t Sam, this isn’t the soul you love, he’s still missing, and you want more from him than just a run of the mill night in bed together With a soulless version of him no less.
You push him away, gently like you always have treated him. “Sam, no…I-I can’t…I’m good, buddy” the nickname “buddy” feels bitter to stutter out. He stands up to his full height, now he’s intimidating as he stares down at you with those eyes. Blankly staring with a dark glint that you hope isn’t saying what you think it’s saying. “Okay…no problem, I’ll be here if you change your mind”. His large hand comes up and tilts your chin high to make you meet his gaze.
That smirk doesn’t budge as he stares at you with a hunger you wished wasn’t real and was at the same time. He leaves you with a nice view of his toned back and shoulders. Leaving you breathless, disappointed in yourself, but also proud. You knew your worth, and this Sam wasn’t the one you wanted to give yourself like that to. Letting out a heavy breath, you straighten yourself up and return to your research, with him staring a hole into your skull from across the room. Jesus….
TWO YEARS AGO: He nearly got married to Becky
The minute Sam called Dean out of the strip club, you felt worry shudder through you. Is he okay? Did he get hurt? Is he kidnapped?? You and Dean talked through the possibilities as he drove to the location he was given, The church made you think witches or even vampires. The two of you changed into FBI attire like Sam asked and headed inside. Then he dropped a bombshell on you both. “I’m in love and I’m getting married” he said it with such certainty and confidence, it stopped you and Dean from functioning for a second. Sending both your souls into bluescreen mode for a moment.
You sat down next to an equally confused Dean as the ceremony started, sharing a wide eyed look while frantically fiending for an answer. Then he lifted the veil of his beautiful-BECKY!?!. Both yours and Dean's jaw dropped as you saw that wide grin on her petite face.“Superfan97??” Dean and you exclaimed at Sam as Becky sat down with you. They prove she’s and their love is the real deal. Every giggle she gives him makes you nauseous to watch. That fucking puppy dog smirk he gifts her with, is another stab to your heart.
It doesn’t help that they start working on the sudden out-of-nowhere-case together as a “newly-wed couple” if you can even call it that. He’s suddenly so supportive of her and proud with every word she spews out. God it’s sickening. It should be you, it should’ve been you, if only it was you. It’s so much it nearly distracts you from Dean trying to get your attention after you left the apartment they had, together- “Hey, c'mon-”. A flick to your forehead gets you to startle and look at him, meeting his concerned gaze. “That?- whatever that was?- was not real, he’s not actually obsessed with her, something’s up, we’ll get to the bottom of it, okay?…” Thank god you told Dean you're into his brother, you needed that reminder. You nod in response with a slow breath, he pats your shoulder and pulls out of the parking spot.
Something tells you to get back to Sammy, leave the passenger’s seat, rescue him from Becky, and that feeling ends up being right. You catch Becky before she can swing a waffle iron at the back of Sam's head (somehow). You knew it was too weird to be true and the satisfaction of being correct fires up more annoyance in you. You snap your fingers, yanking the iron out of her hand and it comes flying to you like Thor’s hammer. “Ah ah ah~” you coo as she turns to you, that wide eyed stare gives you a rush of smug accomplishment. “Oh-hey…you” obviously you knew she’d try to act casual and give away that she is guilty as fuck. “Yeah, me…” you give her a look, a dangerous storm of disappointment and fury ready to strike her down if she makes the wrong move. “Knockin 'him out? Really?” you scoff at her attempt. “For such a reader of “Supernatural”, I’m almost shocked you thought we wouldn’t figure this out, fangirl”. Becky stutters, fidgeting with her hands as she gathers her words to defend herself.
You roll your eyes at her plea for innocence, interrupting her the second she starts the first excuse “Don't wanna hear it-” you let your expression fall into a resting bitch face, intimidating people came easy to you like that, and the fact she knew you were half angel-even more helpful in your tactic to scold her. Then your attention is brought to a headache ridden Sam as he battles whatever Becky doused him with. Giving her a glare of disapproval, you beeline for the person you came back for. “Hey, hey, hey, I’m here, I’m here, let me help” you softly sit beside him as he fights off the effects. “H-huh?” he furrows his brows at you as you place two fingers on his temples and slowly rid him of the potion using some grace. Staring at him with a doting expression the entire time, somehow he won’t remember or take note of.
ONE YEAR AGO: He had a life with a girl and a dog
Losing Dean (for what you didn’t know was the millionth time for Sam) again as well as Castiel, frustrated you on Sam’s behalf. But as Crowley took Kevin away, you turned to the shaken man with a determined look in your eyes. “Sam, I’ll get Kevin, you get away from here with Baby, got it?” you two stared at each other until he was ready to speak. “Y-yeah, I hear you, be safe” he nods, you nod back. His plea for your safety sends a flutter in your heart as you ready yourself to smite some demons for Kevin’s sake. You felt so good as you rescued Kevin, took him to that church, put up the sigils, and kept the boy safe almost effortlessly.
Once you felt comfy leaving him on his own with holy water in a nerf gun and your own angel blade. You went off to find Sam, he wasn’t answering your calls or texts. You hoped he didn’t lose himself in hunting some way to get his brother back since you left him for Kevin. But when you finally tracked his presence, it surprised you. You stood in a well kept yard, a good distance away from a nice house, the home was a beautiful paint color with darker shutters, the cool color tones perfectly contrasting the soft yellow light coming from the window you could see into.
You didn’t want to come inside in case he was busy with something, maybe making a meal for himself and whatever adorable pooch you could hear barking excitedly. Tempted to jump scare him as a fun way to say hi, you suddenly freeze before you could teleport inside. A beautiful, soft, and kind looking lady steps into view in the window, carrying some sort of casserole dish between her mitted hands. Who is she? that question is soon answered as Sam comes into view and kisses her in front of the window for you to see.
Your lips part slowly as the sudden feeling of pained defeat comes back in full swing. You haven’t felt this jealousy since you stopped Ruby from getting into his pants. This woman is his new girl, he’s her man not yours, and they have a dog together. Lucky they named him. For such a smart and nerdy man, he sucks at naming pets. Fighting back tears with every smile he shows her. Every smile he gets in return, you feel your chest tighten. He looks way more relaxed and happy, away from you, away from the life you two had in common. Of course he would, Dean told you how he ran away from home to go to Stanford. He sounded so miserable because of the life their dad roped them into.
Lucky is suddenly let out into the yard with you just standing there like a weeping angel waiting for someone to blink. You made sure you were invisible to humans, but you always knew dogs could sense your presence. Snapped out of your heartbroken trance, you bend down and greet the adorable dog as he trots up to smell you. “Hey buddy, don’t mind me okay? Just watching over your papa”. You can’t help but rub the pooch’s head affectionately. This dog, he makes you feel emotional just watching him look up at you. Because Lucky looks at you the way you prayed Sam would one day. Like you’re the most interesting and beautiful thing in the universe. It hurts how you wished for nights on end that Sam would give you a hint of what Lucky was looking up at you. You waited for just one look your way with such devotion and adoration. Instead, he was giving it so easily to some normal woman, who was the complete opposite of you.
Sure, you were a badass hunter Nephilim with a killer sense of style and humor (according to Dean and many other guys you would run into in bars). But seeing him get with Ruby, Becky (yes you know that was nothing but a potion), and now this curly haired beauty. It makes your inner thoughts in your head start talking shit. Maybe Sam wasn’t into girls like you, maybe he liked them less toned, maybe he liked them more feminine presenting. Maybe…you weren’t his type. Every time your insecurities were recounted in your mind, you felt as if every day with him, caring for him, waiting for him, secretly loving him, was all for nothing. You’d always just be his hunter friend who was also a Nephilim.
“Lucky! Dinner!” His voice made you look up as he came down the porch steps and the dog came bounding over to him. He kneels down and ruffles the fur of his pup. His smile, so bright and nearly breath-taking, you have no choice but to stare. His hair was longer, he was growing little sideburns which you weren’t sure you liked or not, he somehow had grown more, filling out his flannel like it was a second skin. You’d be drooling over the Sam's new look if you weren’t so disappointed.
As they go inside, Lucky gives you one last look, you wave the dog farewell, putting a finger to your lips as you turn to leave. Not staying any longer than your heart could take. Just missing Sam asking Lucky “what’s the matter?” tracing the dog’s gaze into the yard. Where he swears he sees something in the bushes move somehow. But he puts it behind him and leads the dog back inside.
JUST TODAY: You decide to confess to him
Sam and Dean are no longer on speaking terms it seems. They’re always butting heads and arguing over who has the moral high ground. You got so fed up with their shit at one point you made Baby pull over on the side of the road and yelled at them both until you sat back and sighed like a disappointed mom. “God I swear-you two are insufferable sometimes, c'mon, let’s go back to the Bunker” you snapped your fingers and Baby roared back to life again. The rest of the ride was silent and tense, you noticed both brothers briefly looking back at you like you’d set the car's interior and them on fire if they even spoke a word.
It seems like everything is falling apart, as if post trial Sam on his deathbed didn’t send you into a spiral of horrible thoughts and wondering if a confession could never happen. You were eternally grateful that Dean for tricking Sam into saying yes to your uncle possessing him, despite you fearing it may bring back his trauma of his Lucifer’s vessel days. You sit outside his room, waiting with baited breath, for him to come out and find you. Kevin had just reunited with Mrs. Tran as a ghost. You agreed with the man you considered your second little brother. Their fighting needs to stop, it’s getting old. Dean seemed up for the change, but Sam just walked off without a word to either of you.
You offered to go after him for Dean and the man nodded in thanks, going to his room after you sat down in front of Sam’s door. Dean looks back at you, his eyes seemingly saying “do it” before he disappears down the hall. You internalize it and slowly try to calm down, preparing what you might say, what he might say, what could happen, how he could react, how- the door opens and you fall backwards onto the floor, you were so deep in thought that you barely registered. The back of your head was knocking the door for you as you thought to yourself. Now staring up at the object of your affection, and he's looking right back.
He gives you the look that says “what the hell are you doing?” you’ve seen it when Dean does the “Coffee thing” or when you sneak up on someone while he’s watching. That scrunch of his eyebrows and purse of his lip into a thin line. He’s adorable when he’s confused, like a puppy staring at a toy he has no idea what to do with. “You gonna sit there and stare at me or do you need something?" you sit up comically fast and nod. Sam snickers amusedly and helps you up, making you even more flustered as you step into his room, regaining whatever sanity is left from him holding you like that.
Sam closes his door, doing that sexy ass lean men do and the folding of his arms makes you weak, damn him. You turn and take a large breath, steadying yourself. “Sam…” he tilts his head in a familiar way, the one that kept you up for nights on end, why is he so cute??-this fucker-. You find a starter to help yourself go off of “I have been with you and Dean since we met in that Connecticut Inn”. He senses seriousness the minute you start with your first time interacting. “Yeah, it’s been a while hasn’t it” he flashes a small smile your way, it disarms you and comforts you. You love him so much more when he does that, it soothes you to talk slower and more calmly. “Yeah” you nervously chuckle despite that feeling of calm and composure. “Seven years…damn….” You think back on everything, from watching dive recklessly into that pool to save the Innkeeper’s daughter to just a few days ago when he was taken over by Gadreel, who killed Kevin.
“And in that time, you and I…I feel as if we’ve grown close, and-” you find yourself afraid to say it, so you stall further. “I’ve saved your ass more times than I can count, you’ve saved mine, far less but the effort is appreciated”. He snorts and shakes his head, he swears you’re like Dean when you deflect with humor and snark. “Right, that’s exactly why you came here, sitting outside my room like a lost cat waiting to be let in from the rain” his teasing isn’t lost on you, and you feel your face heat up with embarrassment, this motherfucker. “Shush-I’m getting there” you retort indignantly. He snorts again, and for some goddamn reason, chooses then to walk over to you. FUck-. You stiffen noticeably and he stops getting any closer. Of course, him being himself, he backs off and softens into the caring man you fell for all those years ago.
“You okay?” he asks, watching as you shake your head and sit on the end of his bed. He closes the distance a small amount and crouches in front of you. He sees you internally panicking over whatever's on your mind. “Hey…it’s okay, take your time, I’ll stay as long as you need to explain whatever it is” he says it so sweetly-damn him. With a long and drawn out breath, you meet his gaze and nearly stop functioning like a human again. Sam’s giving you that look, attentive, ready to listen, patient, just Sam to a T. God you fall in love all over again, just way harder. “Sam…”
As promised he waits, it's almost alarming at how still and silent he is. It makes your slow confession seem like a lifetime as you stall until you can’t take it. “I know you’ve been through a lot since I’ve been tagging along with you and Dean. I know you probably don’t need this right now”. Your hands clench into fists as your body stiffens the closer you get to saying those three words you’ve been dying to say since he smiled for the first time after Dean went to Hell. “I didn’t know when to say it, but I always knew I had to one day and-it-I-felt so lost trying to find when to”. You look up at him, only briefly as you mutter something in another language . He chuckles as he tries to understand from your tone alone what you were saying and if it was directed at him or yourself.
“Take your time, I’m right here” those last words transport you back to when you watched him bury Dean and you had to stop him from attacking the newly covered grave. It was to comfort him, and now he’s using those words to comfort you in such a vulnerable time. “Sammy…” your voice breaks as emotion overcomes you. He takes your shoulder in one hand, rubbing circles into it with his thumb. “Hey, hey ,hey, don’t worry, whatever it is-I can handle it, don’t worry” he reassures you while he slowly sits next to you on the bed. You sniffle as you try not to cry because of him. “Sammy…” he nods and waits for you with baited breath. Then. You let the truth flow out of you.
“I love you”
You’re met with the inevitable silence of a love confession. His eyes do that thing, that thing they do when something finally makes sense. In your emotional state, you can’t help but repeat it “I love you, Sam Winchester, I have for so long and-”. You stop to wipe your eyes and continue “I just felt like the right time would never come so I thought I’d just do it…now-today” you look up at him with anxiety and hope. His eyes move away, and it scares you more, did you scare him off? Is he about to reject you and friendzone you? What is going on in that brilliant, beautiful mind of his??.
“Sam, please say something-I-” you plead, waiting for his eyes to come back to yours. His lips are parted with unsaid words as he suddenly is left speechless. “Oh…” that single word makes you stand up in dreading anticipation of a no, you feel guilty for timing your confession so horribly after waiting so long to do it. “I-I’m sorry-I’ll go, I’m sorry, I made you so-” you shakily exhale and turn to leave. A hand on your wrist spins you back around and you're face to face, then leans down and he kisses you. That kiss you’ve been fantasizing about for years, it's happening. It’s so soft, it’s painfully sweet, perfect and slow, it’s full of warmth, and it’s exactly what you need after feeling like such a fuck up. He doesn’t pull away until you're ready to part from him, leaving you breathless and speechless. He wipes your falling tears away quietly and he smiles, ever so lovingly at you.
“Don’t go, you didn’t let me say it back to you”.
