okay kinda rant about a thing i struggle with that's tied to my alterhumanity
i
can't
stand
cleaning
cleaning my den and moving things around brings down my vibe so bad and i have a somewhat related issue with cleaning my bedding/toys and its partially related to my nonhumanity and partially to my autism
i cannot stand change in my space
ive noticed the family dog is the same way, she gets sulky when my mother decides to rearrange furniture
dogs are creatures of habit and comfort and i am definitely a dog
ive been putting off and procrastinating and lying about and purposefully distracting myself from getting my room clean because ive been absolutely dreading this depressive mood it always puts me in
meanwhile i feel disgusting as garbage and laundry piles up
it's something I'm working on
the last time i cleaned i was able to keep it clean a couple weeks longer than usual
now im just laying here, halfway done, taking a break because that low mood has hit and my motivation drained pretty quickly
I'm going to get it clean tonight even if it means pulling an all-nighter and being exhausted for work tomorrow, i have monster to help with that
it's by no means getting fully finished tonight but i intend to get my floor cleared and my gear hung up properly so it doesnt get wrecked
