I keep getting mistaken for a trans man by other trans women on this stupid site, and it's bumming me out so effing much, and I wanted to get to the bottom of it, so I decided to make a post to the transfeminism and transmisogyny tags asking people to tell me what about my blog gives off "trans man."
Practically self-harm, honestly. I hate myself so fucking much right now, almost as much as I hate the state of this website's so-called "transfeminism."
After having the post there for almost a week, the results I got were:
• They searched "trans" on my blog and the first result was apparently something from 2 months ago about Sam Nordquist (murdered TMOC.)
• I have an anime man as my profile picture, which I guess should kill me dead from the dysphoria that a real trans girl would get from having that or something.
• My 18+ blog has a lot of stuff about my dick (which I refuse to call my girlcock, because I just don't want to), and there's "nothing that's usually found on a tgirl's kink blog." No effing clue what that means.
• I reblogged a post that contains, "We're all faggots in the eyes of the state, so do what you want forever," which is apparently a transmisogynistic dogwhistle.....???
And lastly, but certainly not leastly...
• I am marked red on Shinigami Eyes, for a reason that is honestly beyond me. I've seen people complain about it, specifically transmascs and intersex people, but again: I'm neither of those, and (ashamed as I am to say this now) I don't really reblog anything about intersexism, let alone transandrophobia. I might as well though, honestly. I don't want to be in the company of anybody who would hate me for that.
And I got a couple really nasty comments in general too. This one stood out to me, in really just the worst way possible, and is now seared into my brain: "This post itself reads like a TME trying to troubleshoot why their transfem disguise isn't getting them accepted into the sisterhood."
This is just disgusting ass bullshit I'm sorry anon. To be honest, transfem spaces these days are all like this. Miserable assholes all circling around each other - preying on others downfall. They are all self-loathing and they truly want to take it out on others.. So these toxic pits form where you have to either engage in this type of bs and "play/look the part" or you have to be isolated from your community. It's disgusting, it kills every community or conversation we could try to have.. Part of the reason this blog exists is because I am so tired of seeing shitty assholes ruin everything for those who truly just want communtiy.
I hope you heal up, and I hope the losers who found your post go through some heavy soul searching.
Do you know anyone in college? What are they studying?
Yes a few people. Studying different things.
Do you have a laptop for school?
We didn't have to when I was in school.
Have you ever in your life had a bunkbed?
No.
Have you ever been to any form of summer camp?
Yes, as a kid several times.
Did you hook up with anyone?
Not at the summer camps if that's what I mean? I was a kid.
Have you ever hooked up with anyone?
Yes.
Do braces make people ugly?
No.
Aren’t these questions pretty mundane?
Yes but I prefer mundane questions. It's usually hard for me to put my thoughts into words about complicated topics. I also don't have energy to fight with random people about politics or other controversial topics so I usually answer those kind of questions pretty vaguely if at all.
Are you better at showing love, or professing it?
Showing.
Waffles or pancakes?
Whatever. I rarely eat either.
Were you in Girl Scouts when you were a little girl?
Yes.
Have you ever been to a church concert?
Yes.
Do you have anything signed by a celebrity?
No.
Name something of yours that holds sentimental value.
I don't know.
Have you ever been in a cave?
A small one.
What can you see out your bedroom window?
Parking lot, houses, cars, trees.
Have you ever climbed a rock-wall?
No.
Wall-E or Eva?
I haven't seen Wall-E.
Have you ever chased after someone that really wasn’t worth it?
No.
Would you ever wanna go caving?
Why not?
Do you use an eyelash curler?
No.
You walk in on your best friend making out with your ex. What now?
I don't have exes.
Have you ever had a macaron?
No.
Have you ever been on stumbleupon.com?
I've never heard of that.
What about angryalien.com?
Or that either.
Have you ever actually met anyone named “Bob”?
I don't remember.
First & middle name together.
-
If you had a $50 giftcard for Hallmark, what would you buy there?
I don't know what they sell there.
When you get a box of chocolates, how long does it last?
Not for long.
Would you ever visit a nude beach?
It could be interesting lmao. Nudity isn't a big deal for me.
Do you remember Veggie Tails?
Never heard of it.
How many cheap elastic bracelets do you own?
None.
Do you ever make hemp jewelry?
No.
Have you ever had feelings for someone, and wished you didn’t?
Yes.
Have you ever witnessed a real fight?
Yes and unfortunately also taken part.
Do you have any beanbags? What do they look like?
No.
Maybe a LoveSac?
I do't know what that is.
What’s your favorite kind of cake?
Chocolate.
Have you ever tried any form of tofu?
Yes, I love tofu.
Do you like Bloc Party?
I don't know what that is.
Have you ever watched 24?
No.
Have you heard A Fine Frenzy’s new album yet? It’s pretty good.
I haven't.
Have you ever broken up with someone to regret it later?
Never been in a relationship.
What are you eating for dinner tonight?
I already ate beans and rice.
Are you gonna go see fireworks on the 4th?
We don't have fireworks then. I assume you mean USA's independence day. I live in Finland.
Are you more excited or nervous for school in August?
I'm not in school.
Do you even go back in August?
_
Name every single color you’re wearing. (:
Black, grey, yellow, light pink, brown, red, pink. That's what you get from having colourful socks.
Katt Williams, Russell Brand, David Spade, Adam Sandler, or Dane Cook?
I don't even know them all.
If you watched American Idol this year; Are you glad Lee won?
I didn't.
Wasn’t Krystal kind of way better?
-
Do you miss Jason Castro, like me?
Who?
Well, what are you gonna go do now?
No idea.
Wait - Do you like Teddy Geiger? (:
Who?
Oh, and have you ever flirted with a gay guy you didn’t know was gay? :o
1 - When was the last time you spent over $100 in one transaction? What did you buy?
When I bought a new phone and earbuds in August.
2 - Do you sleep with a stuffed animal? Would you judge a grown adult for doing so?
I do and I don't judge.
3 - Would you describe yourself as fashion-conscious, or do you just wear whatever feels comfortable?
I wear whatever I like.
4 - The last time you got up from where you’re sitting, where did you go and what did you do?
I went to make coffee in the kitchen.
5 - Would you rather read an erotic novel or watch an erotic film?
I don't have a preference actually.
6 - Who taught you how to tell the time on a proper analogue clock?
Mum most likely.
7 - What’s your favourite way to make your home smell good? Do you spend a lot of money on making this happen?
I don't pay attention to that.
8 - How long have you had the computer/tablet you’re currently using? Does it need replacing or upgrading?
I bought this desktop computer in 2019 if I remember right. It works fine so no need to replace or upgrade. I even switched from Windows to Linux when this computer wasn't compatible with Windows 11 so I didn't have to spend 1000 euros on replacing a perfectly well working computer.
9 - When you’re home alone, do you make sure all your doors are kept locked?
Yes.
10 - How often do you light candles? Do you just like regular ones or do you prefer scented ones or ones that make pretty patterns when they melt?
Rarely. I don't really have much room on tables in my room for candles and they would probably be a fire hazard here.
11 - Are you any good at taking care of plants?
I have never tried.
12 - How many surveys have you taken so far today? Will you take anymore surveys today once you’ve finished this one?
I haven't counted. I might take more, I'm really bored.
13 - What are the main two colours in the room you’re currently in?
White and whatever light brown the floor is.
14 - What was the last hot drink you consumed? What about cold drink?
Coffee. Water.
15 - Do you have piercings anywhere except your ears? How many and what are they?
I don't even have ear piercings.
16 - Do you prefer taking baths or showers? How come?
Showers, I don't have a bath tub.
17 - What time do you need to wake up tomorrow morning? What is it that you have to be up for?
I have work at 13:30 so at latest 12. But I try to get up earlier.
18 - If you work, how often do you get paid? Would you prefer to get paid more or less often?
Monthly. It's what I'm used to so it's fine.
19 - What does your favourite pair of pyjamas look like? Do you wear them to sleep or just to be comfy around the house?
I don't own any pyjamas.
20 - How often do you wake up in the night needing a pee?
Sometimes.
21 - What apps do you use the most on your phone?
Sports results app and one game most likely. I prefer using a computer for internet.
22 - Do you prefer cats or dogs? Do you own any of either?
I love them both. I don't actually own either but my mum has a dog and I kinda consider her mine too because we got her when I still lived with my mum. She's a 16-year-old pug/chichuahua mix.
23 - Do you have one of those fridges that has an ice-maker in the front? If not, would you find one useful?
I don't have an ice-maker and I wouldn't find that useful.
24 - Do you like wearing hats? What’s your favourite style?
I don't like or dislike it. No favourite style.
25 - If you live in a household with pets, who is responsible for their care - both in terms of finance and the physical tasks involved?
-
26 - What’s your opinion on leggings as pants?
I don't like that but of course people can do whatever thay want.
27 - Have you ever driven in bare feet or do you think that’s too dangerous?
I haven't and it sounds both dangerous and uncomfortable.
28 - Have you ever walked out of a job before? What were the circumstances and did you ever go back?
I haven't.
29 - Do you collect anything? Are these things worth money or are they practical/sentimental items?
Hockey cards. They're just fun.
30 - Do you have anything hanging from your ceiling apart from lights?
No.
How many sugars do you take in your tea/coffee?
None.
Have you eaten any kind of cereal today?
No.
Has anyone you know had their birthday recently?
No.
Do you ever watch quiz shows?
There aren't really any that are good. Most I've watched have been too slow paced.
When was the last time you washed your hair?
The day before yesterday.
Who was the last person you had a video call with?
I don't remember, I don't do those.
Do you have any friends that you’ve known since childhood?
No.
When was the last time you painted your nails? What colour?
They're painted dark green right now.
Who was the author of the last book you read? What was it called?
-
Have you eaten a chocolate bar today? What kind was it?
No.
Have you had butterflies in your stomach at any point today?
No.
Who was the last person you talked to, whose name started with H?
An online friend I met for the first time on Saturday.
When was the last time you ate waffles?
I don't remember.
Have you heated any food in your microwave today?
Not yet.
Do you own any items of clothing with cartoon characters on them?
No.
Have you ever played Animal Crossing?
No.
Would you ever dye your hair the same colour as the top you’re wearing?
Black. Yes and I've done that.
Name a woman you know who has blonde hair.
My cousin. I think she's the only blonde in my family.
Do you have a close friend whose name begins with the letter C?
No.
How many women do you know named Natalie?
None.
Is there a jar of honey in your cupboard?
Yes. My mum bought it because she visits here quite often and likes to put it in her tea. I hate honey.
Do you own anything e.g jewelry, accessories with your initial on it?
No.
Who is the first person you can think of, whose name begins with P?
An ex best friend I haven't been in touch with for a few years.
Have you said ‘I love you’ to anyone today?
No.
Do you own any cats or dogs? What are their names?
The dog I mentioned earlier is named Nelli.
Who was the first person you messaged on Facebook today?
I haven't messaged anyone today.
Do you have a lamp in your bedroom?
Yes.
Who was the last person you had a meaningful conversation with?
Friends.
Do you have a favourite lipstick? What colour is it?
I only have red lipstick.
Have you ever had your hair permed? Do you know anyone who has?
I haven't but I know several people who have, including my mum.
Name an animated film that you enjoy as an adult.
Many Disney films. The Great Mouse Detective is my favourite of those.
Do you have any ice-cream in your freezer? What flavour?
No.
Are you in the process of watching or re-watching a series at the moment?
Yes, Star Trek Deep Space Nine and Voyager.
If so, how many seasons does it have? And what season are you currently on?
Both have seven seasons. I'm on season four on DS9 and on season two on Voyager.
Has anyone you know gotten a new pet recently?
Yes.
How old were you 10 years ago? Who were your closest friends at that point?
24. I had the same best friends as now.
Do you still speak to any of them?
Yes.
Have you ever kissed someone of another race?
No.
Are there any races you wouldn’t kiss?
No.
What is your favorite thing about your best friend?
Her humour.
What do you mostly have in common with your best friend?
I don't know, maybe the humour.
Do you like it when men shave their chests? If you are a guy, do you shave?
I'd prefer if they didn't shave but of course I don't think I can dictate what other people do with their bodies.
What is your favourite kind of video game?
Racing and sports.
When you’re visiting a site, do you still type “www.”?
No.
What can you hear right now?
Music.
Do you think it’s okay for kids to have cellphones?
No really. Or at least not smartphones.
Do you watch anime? If so, what are some of your favourites?
I don't.
Do you have any siblings? If so which one of them do you get along with the best?
I don't have siblings.
What’s your favorite TV show? And who’s your favorite character from it?
Star Trek The Original Series. James Kirk.
Have you violated any of the 10 Commandments? If so, what?
I don't remember most of them but I'm sure I've violated some.
Do people think you look like either of your parents? Does that offend you?
No one has ever said anything about that but it wouldn't offend me.
Do you prefer regular bacon or turkey bacon?
Never had turkey bacon.
Do you think it’s weird when people talk to their pets like people?
No. I do that too.
What is the last place, other than home, that you stayed overnight?
My mum's house.
What is the furthest you have traveled alone?
Stockholm.
Have you ever dated someone simply for their looks?
Kinda.
Have you ever been drunk?
Yes.
What was the name of the main character in the last book you read?
Sakari Koskinen.
What are three of your favorite toppings for salads?
Cheese, dressing idk what else.
Do you prefer pizza or hot dogs?
Pizza.
What is your favorite pizza topping?
Cheese.
Is your dad a jerk?
I don't know him.
Is anyone in your family currently in the military?
No.
What is your favorite dog breed?
I don't have one favourite but huskies come to mind, I saw two very pretty ones today. I would never have a husky myself but I love them otherwise.
Have you found any gray hairs on your head?
Yes, a few.
Do you own a bikini?
No. I'm not comfortable wearing a bikini because I'm fat.
If you were a rockstar, what color guitar would you have?
Electric blue would be pretty.
Would you rather have a personal chef or personal house cleaner?
House cleaner definitely! I like cooking but hate cleaning.
Do you have any zits on your face right now?
None.
What are three of your favorite bakery items?
I don't have favourites.
What are three creative hobbies you enjoy?
Drawing, writing, colouring idk.
What are three things you like about church?
None, I don't follow any religion.
What was the last type of pie you ate?
I don't remember.
Which book did you love when you were younger?
A lot.
Which book series could you read again?
A lot.
Tell me about your first breakup, if you had one.
Never had one.
Which person would you chose to travel the world with?
I don't know.
Do you have stuffed animal(s) sitting in your room? Which one(s)?
A dog.
Have you ever had to do a doubletake on someone ‘cuz they were so pretty?
Yes often.
Is your last ex currently in a relationship?
-
Who was the last female you were introduced to?
Online friend.
Who was the last male you were introduced to?
^
Do you use a nightlight?
No.
What’s your opinion on border control?
It's necessary.
What are your favorite things to create?
Drawings.
What’s something you prefer to keep private?
A lot of things.
Are you good at prioritizing?
I think so.
If you’re not religious, were you ever? What made you lose faith?
I have never been.
What feeling do you have the most difficulty in expressing?
I don't know.
When was the last time you looked at your significant other/crush’s Facebook profile?
Do you have an alarm clock, or just use your phone to set an alarm?
I have an alarm clock but I usually use my phone.
Do you own any shirts with wording on them?
Yes, several.
^ If so, what does your favourite one look like?
I don't have a favourite.
What beverage do you prefer to drink in the mornings?
Coffee.
Tell me what some of your nearest & dearest like to eat for breakfast.
Toast I guess.
What colour was the last car you travelled in?
White. It was a taxi.
Have you added any books to your shelves lately?
No.
Have you bought any new cosmetics or toiletries lately? Which?
No.
When was the last time you bought a new pair of shoes?
September.
^ What did they look like?
Black shoes for gym.
Do you own any sparkly accessories?
No.
Do your pets have a specific type of food that they prefer?
No.
When was the last time you ate one of your favourite foods for dinner?
Saturday.
What’s your favourite variety of apple?
I don't have a favourite.
Does anything you own have an image of a cat on it?
I don't think so.
Are you looking forward to anything within the next few days?
I'll go to a party next Saturday.
How have you mostly been feeling today?
Tired.
Does anyone you know own a pocketwatch?
Not to my knowledge.
Do you know what you’re going to have for breakfast tomorrow?
Probably the usual toast. Or oatmeal if I feel different lol.
How did you meet the last person you sent a message to on social media?
-
When you woke up today, did you have unread messages on any social platform?
No.
Do you watch any costume dramas? How about medical dramas?
Neither.
Which of your physical features do you receive the most compliments about?
None.
Look around the room and name 5 random items.
TV, coffee mug, book, scissors, fork.
Why are you doing this survey?
I'm bored.
When did you last charge the battery on your phone?
Earlier today.
Has the last person you texted ever been annoyed at you?
Yeah.
Let’s test your memory … The last time you had your photograph taken, what were you wearing?
Some outdoor clothes because it was outdoors.
Is there anything wrong?
Probably.
Did the swine flu epidemic worry you?
No, it didn't seem as bad as some other diseases.
Have you ever played your music so loudly that your neighbours complained?
No but my mum has complained in the past when I lived with her.
What was life like for you back in 2005?
In some ways quite better than now but in some ways definitely not.
How old were you when you first started to wear make-up? Do you prefer others with or without make-up?
During my teenage years but I don't remember exactly. I don't have a preference with other people, I hope they do whatever they personally want.
Do you prefer regular or diet soft drinks?
Diet.
Name someone whose name begins with a letter ‘G’. Tell me a fact about that person.
My best friend's sister.
How long do you need to get to know someone, before you’d think about having a relationship with them?
It depends.
Would you ever consider going to meet up with someone you started talking to online?
I've done that, the last time was last Saturday.
Do you know any secrets about the last person you texted?
No.
Do you feel that your most recent ex deserves to be happy?
I don't have any exes.
Can you remember the last time you had to cancel some plans you’d made? What was the reason?
I don't remember.
What is one song that makes you smile, or makes you feel happy whenever you hear it?
There are several songs.
Did someone give you butterflies recently?
No.
Do you know the eye color of the last person you kissed?
I don't remember.
Did you talk to that person today?
I'm not in contact with him anymore.
Did you sleep alone last night?
Yes, as usual.
Have you ever fallen down some stairs?
Many times.
Did you wash your hair today?
No and I probably won't because I don't need to see anyone or go anywhere else than a grocery store and I'll wear a beanie anyway because it's cold outside.
Was your last text message from the opposite sex?
No.
Have you ever kissed someone on the same night that you met them?
Yes.
The last drink you had - did it contain caffeine?
Yes, I'm drinking coffee right now.
Are you wearing make-up?
No.
Are you alone in the room atm?
Yes.
Are you 100% satisfied with your life as of now?
No, I don't even know if that's possible.
How long have you been sober?
Since yesterday.
Do you think you are an argumentative person?
No.
How’s your heart lately?
Fine.
Do you still talk to the person you lost your virginity to?
No.
Is it harder to be rejected or to reject someone else?
Be rejected.
What is the best thing about your current job?
I like it in general, can't name the best thing.
What’s the last thing you drank?
Coffee.
Have you been on a date in the park?
No.
Where are you going on your next vacation?
I don't have anything planned.
Are most of the friends in your life new or old?
New right now.
Have you ever gotten so wasted, you didn’t know what was going on?
Not really.
Do you like pulp orange juice?
It's fine but I prefer no pulp.
Do you prefer the tanning bed or the sun?
I don't like tanning but I would prefer the sun if I did.
Who and when was the last person of the opposite sex that hugged you?
One of the online friends I met on Saturday.
Were you single on your last birthday?
Yes.
Who was the last person you talked to before you went to bed last night?
Mum.
Do you have a friend who you think is a sex addict?
No.
When was the last time you cried?
July when my dog died.
Ever kissed a Robert, Tyler, Ryan, or Michael?
Not to my knowledge but I don't know the names of all the men I've kissed.
Name something you dislike about the day you’re having?
I'm tired.
When will your next kiss be?
I don't know.
Do you hate the last person you kissed?
No.
Where is the last person you kissed?
No idea. Like I said, I don't have any contact with him anymore.
Has anyone ever seen you in your underwear?
Yes.
Who was last to cook for you?
A relative.
Are you attracted to the last person that kissed you?
I was then.
Do you remember the first conversation you ever had with the person you currently have feelings for?
I don't have feelings for anyone.
All girls deserve sunshine right?
Why not?
Who was the last person you saw besides family?
A neighbour and his kid.
What are you not looking forward to?
A party I'm going to net Saturday.
What makes you cry right now?
Nothing.
Will this week be a good one?
I can only hope so.
Who is the last person that texted you?
Mum.
Where did you get the shirt you’re wearing?
I got it as a present.
What are you listening to?
Music.
What are you going to do next?
Maybe another survey.
Will you regret your next kiss?
How would I know? But I don't think it's likely because I have never regretted a kiss before.
Who was the last person you gave the finger to?
I don't remember.
Do you currently have feelings for anybody?
No.
Who did you last make plans with?
Online friends.
Are you the oldest?
Oldest of what?
Have you ever liked someone that treated you like crap?
No.
Do you enjoy eating veggies?
Yes.
Do you know the difference between a vegan and a vegetarian?
Yes.
Who did you text most today?
I haven't texted today.
Do you have a reason to frown right now?
Not really idk.
Would you prefer to go out on a fancy date or just chill in his house?
Chill out, I'm not a fancy person lmao.
Are you wearing socks?
Yes. I almost always am because my feet get easily cold if I don't.
Do you enjoy long car rides?
Yes if I can drive. Otherwise not because I tend to get motion sickness.
