Here is my writing for the next day of Whumptober ran by @ouatprompts
I’m not sure how I fully liked this short fic but I think it still came out alright :)
At first I was going to just do Emma swan but decided to add a bit of CaptainSwan in it :)
You can also find it on A03!
I did the prompts insomnia-trust issues-“why did I think you cared?”
Summary: Emma Swan is struggling with insomnia, haunted by nightmares of her past and overwhelmed by the emotional weight of recent events. After days without sleep, she finds herself in a late-night confrontation with Killian, where her deep-seated trust issues resurface, leading her to question why she ever believed anyone could truly care for her.
Emma sat on the couch, staring blankly at the wall. Her fingers tapped rhythmically against her knee, a subtle attempt to ward off the exhaustion creeping over her. It had been three days. Three long nights of tossing and turning, her mind buzzing with thoughts she couldn’t quiet and dreams she was too scared to fall into.
Her eyes burned, heavy from the lack of sleep, but she didn’t dare close them. Not again. Not when she knew what waited behind her eyelids—nightmares of everything she’d buried deep: the foster homes, Neal abandoning her, Killian’s death, and every loss she had ever suffered replaying in vivid, soul-crushing detail.
She ran a hand through her hair, pulling it into a messy knot, and sighed. “I’m fine,” she mumbled to herself, trying to convince herself of a truth she didn’t believe.
The door creaked open, and Killian stepped out of the bedroom, his expression immediately softening as he saw her. “Emma, love… you’re still awake?” He walked over, concern etched in his face.
Emma kept her eyes fixed on the floor. “Couldn’t sleep.” She said simply.
“You haven’t slept in days,” Killian said softly, sitting beside her. “Talk to me.”
She bit the inside of her cheek, not wanting to look at him. She knew he cared—she could see it in his eyes, hear it in the way his voice softened whenever he spoke to her. But that was the problem. Caring. Letting someone in. Trusting that someone would stay when every damn person she had ever let into her heart eventually left. She didn’t want to end up alone and watching him leave her.
“I’m fine,” she repeated, her tone sharper this time. She wasn’t ready for this—wasn’t ready for the vulnerability that came with admitting how messed up she was inside.
Killian studied her for a moment, his brow furrowing. “Emma, you’re not. Something’s been keeping you up, and I don’t think it’s just a bad dream.”
Her heart pounded, a mix of frustration and guilt rising in her chest. She knew he was right, but that only made it worse. Why did he have to care so much? Why did he have to see through her defenses?
She swallowed hard, her throat tight. “Why did I even think you cared?” The words tumbled out before she could stop them, bitter and laced with more hurt than she’d intended.
Killian blinked, taken aback. “What?” He asked he was a little shocked and surprised by the sudden change in her tone. How bitter her words sounded
She stood up abruptly, needing space, the walls closing in on her. “I mean, what’s the point?” she snapped, her voice rising. “Everyone leaves. So why do I keep pretending it’s different this time?”
He stood up too, stepping toward her, but she backed away. “Emma, I’m not—”
“Don’t,” she cut him off, holding up a hand. “Don’t say it. I’ve heard it all before. ‘I’m not leaving, I’ll always be there,’ and then you’re just… gone. Everyone’s gone.”
The silence that followed was heavy, filled with all the words she wasn’t saying. Killian didn’t respond right away, giving her the space she needed even though she could feel the weight of his gaze on her. He was calm, and collected, and that only made her angrier.
“I’m not Neal, Emma. I’m not your parents, and I’m not anyone who ever left you,” Killian said quietly, his voice steady but firm. “I’m here. Right here. And I’m not going anywhere.”
Her fists clenched at her sides, the flood of emotions threatening to drown her. She wanted to believe him, wanted to trust that he wouldn’t just leave her standing alone in the cold. But after years of being abandoned, of being left alone or hurt when she trusted someone.
Trusting someone to stay was harder than facing her nightmares.
She turned away from him, arms crossed tightly over her chest. “Yeah, well... we’ll see.”
The apartment was still, the faint sound of the town in the distance the only noise. Emma lay in bed, staring at the ceiling. Her heart ached, her head was heavy, but her mind refused to shut off. She rolled over, pulling the blanket tighter around herself.
Killian was asleep beside her, his breathing slow and steady. She didn’t deserve him—not after everything she’d said. Not after she’d pushed him away like she always did.
