Wayfaring Stranger | Self:Closed
triggers: mentions of death, mental illness
disclaimer: so this is like my way of giving you insight on who Luke is and what is it he’s supposed to be doing at this place. If there’s anything you need clarification on, please message me. Also this is really long I’m sorry
“We gave you a week to get settled and get to know everyone, it’s strictly business from now on,” the stern voice stated, Luke sitting in the leather brown chair, adjacent to the team of individuals who were all blackmailing him and many others to be at the complex.
“Luke,” one of the men started - he’s definitely the head boss - his physique sharp, not a hair out of place, “You’re one of the only people here who can give us what we want, you’re the only one who can manipulate the hell out of those … delinquents and get them to spill anything and everything.” He noticed the others nodding their head, Luke finding himself nodding along - just like a bobble-head - wanting to get out of the situation that he was in. He truly wasn’t sure how comfortable he’d feel outing out his friends, he wasn’t sure if his friends would push him away if they learn of what he does. “Go on Luke, tell us what you know,” a woman encouraged, the boy pushing back a little, looking at his hands that were placed on the table.
“Well,” he started, and then looked up, seeing his best mate in the background, crossing his arms and shaking his head disapprovingly, he couldn’t believe he was about to do this - that he was willingly going to out his friends’ secrets and their inner thoughts. He really didn’t care, because he wasn’t attached per say to anyone, but he simply just felt bad. They were right, he was good at manipulation, and getting others to talk because he eventually found the right question to ask. Just like he did with Louis, and then again with Harry and with Luna during his first nights at the complex. He did have the ability to get others to say and answer any question he wanted. Maybe that’s why he was wanted for this job, maybe that’s why they encouraged him to take the job and give him the benefits they did - offering to buy him his medications for his hallucinations, and help give him time to schedule in the monthly doctor visits that he had to do since the accident.
“Don’t do it,” the voice said, looking at Luke with disapproving eyes, shaking his head in a warning. “You can’t do that, not to them,” the voice repeated, Luke recognizing the familiar eyes that he had missed. He longed to actually see those eyes, to hear that voice again. But — the boy wasn’t really there, he wasn’t talking to him, it was all a figment of his imagination, or so, that’s what the twenty-eight year old repeated to himself in his head, “He’s not here, he’s not real,” he would tell himself, his eyes still staring at the group blankly, as if he was thinking. “Luke, babe you’re better than this, you know that, you’re stronger than them, than what they’re making you do, all they want is to break your character, break the very thing about you that I love.” Luke stared at the boy, in awe of his words, in awe of how comforting they sounded, and how real his voice was. Could he really be there? Was the boy that Luke longed for in front of him, trying to keep him from making a mistake?
“There is this couple—” Luke started to expose, before hearing that voice again, as if warning him. Luke’s gaze moved from the group in front of him to the figure in the back of the room, leaning against the wall. He missed those eyes, the piercing green eyes that would every night look at him with so much love and attention, well that was until his life was taken and Luke’s was spared. The boy stood up and excused himself, “Excuse me for a moment,” he apologized in a professional manner, “I have to use the restroom,” he expressed, looking at the group of people who were clearly unamused with him, “I really need to go, I had some burritos for lunch with some of the guys and I don’t think my stomach is having them,” he admitted, shrugging his shoulders as if to tell them not to hold him accountable for this intrusion. Pushing the brown wooden door, the boy made his way into the washroom and stood in front of the mirror, taking in deep breath in an attempt to catch his breath and provide himself with the opportunity to get the image of the boy out of his head. “I’m still here,” he said with a smile, appearing in the mirror behind Luke, the brunette turning to face the blonde, his eyes widening as he gripped the counter tightly. His knuckles were turning white with the grip he held, stopping himself from the urge of reaching out to touch the boys’ cheeks.
“What are you doing here?” he asked with a hoarse voice, his eyes wide as he tried to examine the situation he was placed in. “You can’t be here unless..” he trailed, the younger boy cutting in, “Unless I’m here? But I can’t answer your first question. I’m here because you want me here Luke,” a husky, yet angelic, tone hitting the brunette’s ears. He didn’t age a day, the blonde boy with the green eyes that captivated Luke, the way it did many years prior. He stood up a little, “Remember the time you were at an interview and got nervous, and all I could do was tell you how adorable you get when you’re nervous? You’re still doing the same thing,” he chuckled, shaking his head as he stared at the brunette. Luke gulped, “I’m not nervous, I just don’t think I should push anything yet, I mean I’m only just meeting them, and I think they deserve a few more days worth of me getting to know them before I ruin they lives and spill their secrets,” he shrugged honestly.
“That’s another thing I love about you, how you care for others even though you’d never admit it,” The boy, who Luke called boyfriend at a time, well, he was right. Luke always wanted the best for his friends, and usually did what would not only benefit him, but the person who was involved. He didn’t want to get anyone in trouble, but with the way his job was planned, the objectives that were set out for him, coercing him to abandon his beliefs and values, even if it is for mere and simple topics. Conflicted, Luke looked up at the boy, needing help and assistance from him, the boy being the only person who could get through to him in times like these, “What am I supposed to do, James? Help me figure out what to do,” he pleaded.
James walked over to Luke, putting his hands on his face, cupping it as he ran his thumb across the older boys’ cheeks. “You’re going to do what you always do, which is the right thing,” the boy whispered as Luke leaned into the touch, craving it. Luke’s mind instantly started to run at the different outcomes that could come of him telling someone what he learned. Yes he was only there for a week, but even at his first night he could have ran to Management, ran to where he was supposed to be, and told them everything. But did they deserve to know? Was it really for the sake of their health and well-being or did Management want to continue holding stuff over their heads? He knew that they would threaten him, tell him it was either he talks or his secret gets outed to the world; and though Luke didn’t care much for his secret, he had to admit that telling someone would be better than them finding out the harsh and cruel way.
“I don’t know what’s right,” he whispered to the boy, talking to him, needing not only his comfort but his words so he could calm his nerves. He had to go back in unfazed, he had to win them over, get them to see his side of the story and the problem. He didn’t want to say anything just yet, James was right, Luke was going to do the right thing, whether he believed in it at that moment or not. The brunette, who was forced to become independent, forced to teach himself the lessons that every parents should teach, well he started to figure out what was right and wrong, what was ethical and unethical for anyone to do. He was a firm believer in knowing who one is, and was going to stand by that theory until he could say that he did good. No matter what he does, Luke attempts to do what is ethical, what is right and what will provide him with the opportunity to do the least damage. Though his job entitled him to out peoples’ thoughts, conversations and emotions, he still felt like he didn’t hit deep enough, that there are other things besides an ex couple reuniting and a current couple going through a breakup.
“There has to be more to this place than just teenage TV drama,” he shrugged, looking up and not seeing the blonde. He furrowed his eyebrows, looking around, “James? James where did you go? We weren’t done yet,” he stated, though his voice turned up an octave as it ended in somewhat of a questioning tone. He was confused at how James could leave so abruptly, he didn’t even hear the door shut like he did when he walked in. “James?” Luke tried one more time, frowning as he realized the boy wasn’t really there. To any bystander who walked in those past few minutes Luke was talking, they would have thought he was crazy, standing there in the washroom, admitting things to the air; they would have concluded that he was talking to himself, and well, he was - though Luke himself didn’t know.
He hasn’t seen James in a month and a half, which was extremely long since they used to talk every day or at least once a week. But he indirectly started to not take his medicine, and maybe because he was sick prior to coming and they wouldn’t have worked with the antibiotics he had to take. Regaining his composure and thinking of the lie he was going to say to give himself more time, the boy took a look at himself in the mirror and walked back into the room that quieted down at his re-appearance. “I need more time,” he said with a shrug, looking at them with glassy-like eyes. “I still need them to trust me, and get used to having me around and asking the questions I’m asking,” he lied through his teeth, shrugging his shoulders as he looked up at them. He saw them start to get visibly upset, the boy letting out a laugh, “You’re paying me to get you dirt on your artists and whatever, so you have no right to yell at me. I have to get them to trust me before they actually start to open up to me,” he explained, staying calm, seeing one man - the head boss - widen his eyes. “You’ve got a month,” he threatened, pointing at Luke and then walking out, ending the meeting abruptly.
