#recognising triggers

[mental-health-advice]

Hi, do you have any ways to cope with anxiety? I feel like I’m not even existing anymore, it’s like I’m just in my head 100% of the time and it’s starting to take away from life for me, please tag this as h44 thank you!

Hi lovely,

Thank you for getting in touch with us here at MHA! I amreally sorry to hear that you are struggling with anxiety, I know how awfulthat can be - hopefully I’ll be able to give you some advice and reassurance tomake it all a little easier for you.

Firstly, I’m just wondering if you have seen a professionallike a doctor for your anxiety?  I reallyrecommend going and talking to a professional like a GP or counsellor. Theywill be able to help you explore and understand your feelings and give you somecoping mechanisms. You may be offered medication, talking therapies, and manyother options; it is about working with the professional and finding whichtreatment will work best for you in your current state. Talking therapy may be areally good place for you to start as a therapist will be able to help youunderstand your negative thoughts and what is triggering them. A good place tostart would be your doctor; they can explore possible diagnosis’s with you andwill be able to refer you to some more specialist help from a mental healthpractitioner.  Here is our page aboutgetting help which might be useful in answering some concerns you have abouttalking to a professional; if you have any further questions about getting helpthen please feel free to send us another message and one of the other lovelyadmins or myself will get in touch with you again ASAP <3  Professionals are there to help you in anyway they can, they won’t judge you, or make you do or tell them anything youdon’t want to. If reaching out directly to a professional is not an option foryou right now, then is there an adult that you trust such as a schoolteacher/member of staff, someone you work with?

I am going to link you to our self-help and calming pagesabout anxiety. These pages have some great tips about dealing with anxiousthoughts. But I’m going to go into a little more detail about some of thosepoints based on my own experiences and knowledge.

My first tip is to try and identify any particular triggers foryour anxiety - for example, I know a big trigger for me is not being able tosee a door. Taking the time to work out what makes you feel worse can hep youto start feeling a little more in control, particularly because you may be ableto recognise the times when you are likely to feel more anxious. Of course,sometimes anxiety attacks can occur without any specific trigger, but it isstill worth keeping a note of when it happened and what you were doing at thetime.

Next is to make sure you are taking good care of yourself.So this involves things like staying hydrated, getting enough sleep, and eatinghealthily. Personally I do think there is a certain amount of truth to thesaying ‘healthy body, healthy mind’ – if you are already feeling a bit low dueto not taking the time to look after yourself, it is likely that it will makeyour anxious and negative thoughts worse. Try to take at least an hour or two aday for yourself and fill that time with doing things that you enjoy and makeyou feel relaxed and happy. For example, I take a couple of hours before I headto bed and I like to fill that time with art and music; I also use that time tolook after my skin and hair just so I physically feel a little better.

Maybe creating a daily schedule would help you to feel alittle more active in your life and at less of a standstill. This doesn’t haveto be big activities whilst your anxiety is still so bad, but could includelittle things like what time you are going to get up, doing the dishes orlaundry, etc. Even though these are only small things, when you see that youare sticking to the schedule and ticking things off as you go, hopefully itwill provide you with some encouragement to keep going and try to add a littlemore to your day each day. It is all about keeping small and manageable goals!Planning and looking too far into the future can be difficult when you arestruggling with mental health issues; currently you feel so stuck in yourillness that you can’t see a time when you won’t be struggling – I promise youwill not always struggle as much as you are now. <3

Grounding techniques are personally my go to method for dealingwith my anxiety. Grounding techniques help you to reconnect with reality andkeep your mind from wandering off in the negative thoughts. Here is a link toour page about different methods. Personally, I recommend something physicallike running your hands under icy water. You could also try something likeplaying a categories game with yourself; so, try to think of ‘’breeds of dogs’’,‘’states of the USA’’, or ‘’billboard charts’’ etc. It may take you a littlewhile to find the most effective grounding techniques for you, but hopefullythe ideas on our page will be of some use to you.

I hope this has been of at least some use to you, lovely.Please remember that you can always get back in touch with us if there isanything else that we can help you with. Take care!

‘’Fall down seven times, stand up eight.’’

Rhiann xo

[mental-health-advice]

you know what maladaptive daydreaming is, right? i've had it for a long time, and i'm currently self-treating. i've made progress but at the same time the whole process has been super depressing. i feel empty because i cant daydream, i feel self-hatred because im not normal, and i feel lonely without seeing my paras (characters in my daydreams). i daydream less, think of my paras less,but the emotional part of it is just so overwhelming. i know it takes time but i feel so lost. how can i end it?

Hi lovely,

It is so good to hear that you have recognised you were struggling with maladaptive daydreaming, and have started taking action to help yourself deal with it! I just want to start by saying that it is completely normal to experience sadness and grief over paras when you begin to recover from your daydreams; your feelings are completely valid! Hopefully i’ll be able to give you a little advice.

Although maladaptive daydreaming is not currently recognised as a diagnosable mental health condition, professionals are aware of it, and some treatments have been proven to be effective in helping reduce symptoms. It’s great that you have begun self-treating as that shows determination and mindfulness, but I do think seeking professional guidance may be quite beneficial for you. A mental health professional may be able to help you understand your feelings and give you some more effective coping mechanisms. Your GP may be a good place to start as they can refer you to a mental health specialist. I am linking our page about getting help here, hopefully it will answer any queries you may have about seeking professional help. I am also going to link you to our information page about maladaptive daydreaming here. 

Something important to consider is why you began maladaptive daydreaming and what purpose it was serving for you - many people find that they use it as a coping mechanism for stress or isolation. Getting to the root of it’s purpose for you will be really important for overcoming it. As you have stopped daydreaming yourself, you may find that you are experiencing depressive symptoms because now whatever you were using it as a coping mechanism for, is returning. I cannot be sure, because I am not a professional, but it may be something to consider. Also, recognising your triggers can be really important - so what causes you to start daydreaming? This may be certain thoughts, or situations like a crowded place. Again, understanding these may help you to start overcoming this. 

As well as some professional guidance, there are online communities about maladaptive daydreaming where you can talk to people going through the same struggles as you. Here is one as an example. I’m sure people will be happy to share advice with you about recovery and how they dealt with the highs and lows of recovery!

I hope this has been of some use to you, lovely. Please get back in touch with us if there is anything else we can do for you! Take care,

Rhiann xo