Nov 18, 2023
You guys would literally rather have him be dead than reading the Beetle
.........I mean
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You guys would literally rather have him be dead than reading the Beetle
.........I mean
HOW DID JACK LOSE TO LITERALLY DRACULA
I feel like Mina/Swales would have gotten more votes if I had run that poll after today's entry. Can't believe he lost to a gay man from a different novel.
Speaking of Alan Campbell, I should have had the First Mate of the Demeter as option 9 instead. I feel bad for omitting him. He might even still be alive! Although the polls decided he was rescued by crab!Jonno which is a type of alive!Jonno and therefore outside the scope of this poll
...who wants another poll about it?
two thousand and eight hundred votes??
Inorite??? 2968 by the time it closed. Where are all these people the rest of the time? That's an order of magnitude more than my other polls!
And like 600 of them voted for the trains. I would blame @amtrak-official but honestly it's a very good answer
Delighted by the result that not even death can part our young lovers, which, given that Jonathan has now been missing for 5 weeks, is probably very fortunate.
Also a stunning 36% for Lucy (with or without Arthur.
The overall consensus seems to be that there's no other man for Mina, but she can have a woman instead, as a treat.
So yesterday it seems by a narrow margin we were willing to let Jonathan cross the picket line to rescue the First Mate of the Demeter from a watery grave. The subsidiary poll by a much wider margin says he did this in crab form (carcinize that boy!) which makes sense I suppose because Water. The second best option was that it was the version of him that's running full tilt across the Bay of Biscay and may now be in the English Channel. It would mean a detour of several hundred miles, but that's no worse than Lublin and it's for a good cause. Either way, it seems he has got his Sea Legs.
Looking at some other non-Where's Jonno polls, if he's been rescued/kidnapped by Dr. Who it does seem like it's the version played by Peter Cushing (I did say it was the correct answer) followed by Paul McGann (dressed for it) and Rowan Atkinson. All very good options. Nobody voted for James Darren (the time traveling Dr. Tony Newman from The Time Tunnel) or Luke Perry (Inspector Spacetime from Community) which is fair, I just think I am funny. To the one person who voted Michael Jayston... come here I just wanna talk. And possibly read that fic.
As to the question of his recovery from Brain Fever you guys seem to agree it's to be able to read Mina's emails, which, fair. I would also recover from Brain Fever to read Mina's emails.
It just occurs to me that I shoulda put the First Mate as an option on the Mina shipping poll. But I guess if he's rescued by crab!Jonno then that's a Jonathan lives scenario and the question is moot. Although from the way y'all are voting it seems it may be moot even if he's dead. (Will Mina still want him once he's been carcinized? Who can say!)
I figure no one is disappointed I didn't put Lucy's mother on that poll, but you never know
In an outcome that should surprise no one, Crab Option won with an incredibly 44% of the vote. This is the largest share any option has received in the history of the project (we had a 42.6% once, when we collectively decided he was legally entitled to at least a week off Being In The Novel Dracula. Now that a week has stretched to a month, do we still feel so strongly that it's his just due. Well no, apparently his just due is An Awful Lot of Crabs...)
Now the poll didn't specify what was happening with the crabs, so I guess that's up to you all. Was he eating them? Were they eating him? Was he undergoing carcinization? Did they become friends? Were they trying desperately to warn him that Royen is a coastal city and he should probably stop trying to run due west? (He can't be stopped). Were they once men, and now land crabs? Are there such things as Macra?
I am going to repost @paulgadzikowski 's artistic rendition here, since everyone needs to see it:
.........dangit this shoulda been a poll. Okay hang on.
Poll: What is the meaning of 🦀?
They mistook him (sleeping) for a particularly warm rock
Jonathan has undergone Carcinization (there is only one step and it IS crab)
His bright red Armani boots caused them to accept him as one of their own
Jonathan got a tasty treat (time for crab)
The crabs got a tasty treat (he is like candy to them)
"Royen is a coastal city, idiot!"
They were men. Now, they are Land Crabs
They are a mere manifestation of his madness
They're the lost souls of the men of the Demeter (crab army?)
There Are No Such Things As Macra
woohoo ty for the results chatter
i voted time portal a couple of times after finding the poll but i am glad it leads to being yanked to a seaside town by his gf which will totally happen
You're welcome!
As always, anyone and everyone is welcome to write this fic. Yeah the Time Portal was Mina's July 26th letter arriving a month early, so naturally Whitby must be at the other end of it. We shall see what he finds there.
Now that I have my spreadsheets in order, is there any other particular results chatter people want to see? With the admission that the project isn't over and we have no idea how far into it we are.
I meant to ask the yesterday, but Time Portal enthusiasts, how we feeling?
I finally have some time to crunch some numbers and 40 people picked the time portal option back on July 2nd. I speculated at the time on whether they would be willing to commit to the bit all the way through to the other end of the Time Portal on July 26th and you know what? Exactly 40 people picked the Time Portal yesterday. Was it the same 40 people? Are any of us really the same people after spending nearly four weeks waiting for Jonathan Harker to hypothetically traverse an atextual clerical error?
A strict average gives us 34 votes for the Time Portal per day, but I should go through and remove the outlier days when we got like 900 total votes instead of between 2 and 300 votes, which is where we seem to have settled to
The real outlier on that option was July 23rd, when only 5 people voted for Option 9. My best guess is that the other 20-30 got tempted away by the prospect of hitting Lord Byron Ruthven in the face with a shovel. It's just before the start of the Doctor Who crossover, so that shouldn't be splitting the Time Travel vote.
Anyway IF you 40 are correct and Jonathan successfully traversed the Time Portal, he should be in Whitby now, just in time for Hot Girl Summer.