#rusty bear

[mallyos]

Rusty bear

[saintharvest]

[whats-ursine]

Yep, not going to get any sleep for a while.

Zuzu's in heat, Tränen won't stop whining all night.

[whats-ursine]

Not getting any better, but too aware of repercussions to be a danger to myself. Some people might be relieved by that realization. I'm just disappointed.

It's been over eleven years, mired in this state of mind. Not wanting to exist doesn't seem conducive to caring where I wind up, but it's been a while since anything akin to a breaking point has cropped up. It's almost like I'm getting used to these nervous fits where the knee-jerk response is to abruptly cease contact for an indeterminate period of time. Can't seem to handle much more human interaction than clicking the "like" button a few times a day. Yet trepidation doesn't mitigate the feeling of isolation.

Catch myself staring blankly ahead from time to time. Is my mind playing tricks on me, or did I really lose an hour or two the other day? The context has faded, can't remember the specifics well enough to piece it together. Par for the course, really. Most of my memories are wrong, according to conflicting testimonies. Wonder why.

Probably going to poof this in the morning, like 95% of my other posts.

[whats-ursine]

You know you've hit a new low when you catch yourself thinking "Maybe having fun won't hurt this time"