seen from Germany
seen from Türkiye

seen from United Kingdom

seen from Germany
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seen from Latvia

seen from United States

seen from Israel
seen from China
seen from Germany

seen from Türkiye
seen from China
seen from Canada
seen from Netherlands
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
it’s not your fault but I wish it was
𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚒𝚗𝚗𝚎𝚛 𝚌𝚑𝚒𝚕𝚍 𝚒𝚜 𝚛𝚘𝚘𝚝𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚢𝚘𝚞
˚. ✦.˳·˖✶ ⋆.✧˚
There's a scene in aftersun towards the end of the movie where Sophie tells her father 'Can't live in hotels for the rest of our lives.' Yet after you finish watching the movie, tears streaming down your face, you realise that is exactly what happens to Sophie. She will forever be trapped in that hotel, reliving her holiday over and over again. Each time more terrifying, each time more harrowing.
I wonder if adult Sophie, now more aware, now more Callum than Sophie, wonders what each action of her father meant? People do that, they tend to overcompensate for not seeing things the first time by overthinking the second time. Callum might have wanted to leave his daughter with one last happy memory but memory taints. The window you look at your memories through have glass panes made from emotions. I wonder if the grief gives over to anger or if it coexists. If the walls of the hotel gives up beneath her screeching fingernails, is Sophie free from the suffocation or does she realise she still has a continent to cross to meet herself? Does someone reach Sophie before she meets the same fate as Callum?
“I don’t think I wanna change. I like it here”
Lo que olvidamos primero.
¿Lo notas?
Cómo, de a poco, nos vamos volviendo desconocidos.
Cada vez hablamos menos, cada vez sabes menos de mis días, de mis horarios, de esas cosas mínimas que antes te contaba sin pensar y yo también sé menos de ti, sé menos de tus rutinas, de lo que haces cuando no estás, de las cosas que ahora te hacen reír y a veces me pregunto si esto era exactamente lo que querías.
Si cuando pediste tiempo te referías a esta forma lenta de desaparecer, a convertirnos, despacio, en personas que alguna vez se conocieron demasiado.
Es raro cómo funciona la memoria porque empiezo a olvidar tu olor, tu voz ya no aparece tan clara, incluso tu cara empieza a mezclarse con otras cosas, como una foto que alguien dejó demasiado tiempo al sol.
Y lo más extraño es esto, que ya no me duele igual, creo que hay una parte de mí que encuentra alivio en no reconocerte del todo.
Como si olvidar un poco también fuera una forma de descansar.