#senatepage

[mjoriginals]

On my last day of work, we were reading each other's urban dictionary definitions of our names and part of the definition for "Mary" is "She is committed to one guy only, and is very faithful." I was like, "I don't know how true this definition is..." and will responded with the best thing he's ever said to me. He is the token Straight who is unbanned from making queer jokes. He said, "Yeah, to your father." I died and I think about that often. 😂👌🏽

[mjoriginals]

There's no better art form than Disney on Ice.

Colin

[mjoriginals]

What is this mayo you speak of? I only eat schlick 'em.

[mjoriginals]

Being young is so cliche.

Colin

[mjoriginals]

There are few truths in the world, but one certainty is smoking is cool. All kids are concerned with is kissing people and to kiss people you have to be cool.

Cyrus

[mjoriginals]

I live a simple life. I just need two things: booze and NPR. In that order.

Drunk Colin

[mjoriginals]

People tend to fall in love.

Drunk Colin

[mjoriginals]

Senator Taylor just took my soul and ripped it into itty bitty Mary pieces