am I a bad person for not believing a person I know went through ramcoa? I did and I was talking with them about similar experiences and they just. didn't have any with me then started complaining that no one understands how hard it is to be a ramcoa victim who wasn't in a cult or trafficked which. confuses me what setting it would have happened in then
First, you are neither morally good or morally bad, or in the right or in the wrong, for having thoughts and opinions and feelings. You are free to believe or disbelieve whoever the hell you want. Your behavior is what is important.
Second, immediately jumping into sharing experiences you assume are common with another survivor is a terrible idea, do NOT do that. Even if they did have experiences in common with you, it could have triggered them badly. Also, there's just a lot of experiences in this abuse type that you definitely do not have because it's not possible to experience them every single one and still be alive.
Third, RAMCOA is not a monolith. It's an acronym comprising of 3 separate but overlapping abuse types. Someone who survived OA with no MC is not going to have the same experiences as someone who survived RA and MC. On this point, they are correct that cult abuse and trafficking are not the only forms of RAMCOA. Even within trafficking, people in DID spaces assume you mean sex trafficking when other forms of trafficking exists, but also people assume that sex trafficking is a synonym for child prostitution when it is not. Trafficking requires border crossing, you can have an organized group that is selling children without them crossing state/country borders to do so. Many cult survivors are not OA survivors because there are a significant number of cults in which the abuse lacks the organization necessary for it to become OA. The vast majority of cults wouldn't know how to conduct RA or MC if their lives depended on it. I wouldn't say it is "hard" to be a survivor that isn't a cult or trafficking survivor though, there are plenty of survivors who haven't gone through either or went through more things in addition to one of those (and it's weird to lament about not having been through specific abuse types).
Lastly, it is weird to me that you want me to reassure you about an interpersonal interaction that I am not part of with people I do not know. Also weird to me that you're trying to decide that someone's not telling the truth while not actually understanding what the abuse type is. And infinitely weird that you have positioned yourself as if you are the blueprint for RAMCOA survivors that other survivors have to relate to and share experiences with. I think both you and this other person could use some logging off time.