Living nightmares
TW: Unintentional self-harm, dissociation, PTSD flashbacks, anxiety/panic attacks, sensory overload
Pairings: None but can be implied
Category: Owl House, Reader insert
Note: Meant to be set before the timeskip but after Belos is defeated, but it can also be interpretted as being at the noceda house after the s2 finale. Can be taken in any way, your choice.
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The world was spinning in a blurry dishwasher. When did that start?
"Hunter?"
A voice echoed from somewhere distant. He didn't know where he was, or what happened. It suddenly was hard to breathe.
"Woah, woah okay. Deep breaths, breathe with me."
The voice was close now, albeit still a bit muffled with his ringing ears. It pierced through his hearing suddenly like a flash forward, his vision becoming overly sharp and bright. Hunter squinted and whined softly at the overwhelming array of colors and structures around him, now in full focus.
"Hey, hey." (Y/N) said calmly with a hint of urgency.
Hunter felt a gentle touch on his shoulder, but it made his skin squirm. He gasped out softly and whipped his head to their face. He panted and took it in full excruciating detail. It at least made his lungs feel unblocked again as a wave of calm washed over him. (Y/N) was gazing at him with their sympathetic eyes that held a hint of concern behind them.
"It's okay." They began gently, removing their hand from his shoulder as they sensed his unease.
They held their hand placatingly at a short distance and began to breathe deeply. They were demonstrating how to breathe. Hunter followed almost automatically as his lungs craved oxygen. The deep breaths caused his head to feel airy at first, but (Y/N) continued to gently guide him even as he struggled to keep himself up.. on his hands. When did he get to the floor?
(Y/N) seemed to pick up on his confusion and slightly trembling limbs. "Just focus on breathing right now, nevermind that. Alright?"
They began to count with their fingers in between each deep breath since he couldn't seem to focus. Hunter followed weakly.
They had seen Gus demonstrate this to Hunter in times previous, but they didn't think their own hand would have the same effect as his friend's had before.
A few minutes went by and Hunter seemed to calm down rather quickly. He inhaled deeply and sighed. His limbs felt like lead; he attempted to move to a nearby cabinet with no progress. (Y/N) sensed the issue and swiftly sat him against the lower cabinets before he passed out again.
A beat of silence as they looked worriedly into one another's eyes.
"What.. what happened? Why can't I move?" Hunter asked, his voice creaking from the strain in his throat muscles.
"You had a panic attack I think. Just.. take it easy." (Y/N) said, sitting in front of him on the floor.
"You.. think?" Hunter said, panic seeping into his tone. "I don't.. I don't remember-"
"No no no, don't do that. Trust me." They warned gently.
They seemed to try grounding Hunter by putting a hand cautiously on his knee. He looked at them in confusion, trying to ignore the electricity at their connected limbs.
"Let's not.. go down that route again. That's what got you in this predicament in the first place. No thinking. Take a breather before you cause me to have a crisis too." (Y/N) chuckled nervously.
Hunter nodded and moved his leg onto the floor to rid of the horrible sensation. He's sure whatever happened, they would fill him in later. It seemed he really shook them up, and he didn't want to add to that any more than he already did.
"Alright." Hunter said.
He was happy to sit there for a moment. It's not like he really had a choice, seeing his limbs felt like jelly. But he couldn't help but ponder anyway, and it was clearly evident on his face.
"Hey, you promised." (Y/N) said firmly.
"Sorry, I just can't help it." Hunter said.
(Y/N) sighed and scooted next to him.
"If I tell you, will you promise to try and stay calm? I don't want you hurting yourself."
This worried Hunter. He hurt himself? He looked back to them, guilt written all over his face. He nodded. (Y/N) looked at his expression peculiarly but took a deep breath and continued anyway, shrugging it off for a later question.
"You... were hyperventilating and uh.." They paused, they had to be careful to not set him off again. "Something- something seemed wrong. I tried to snap you out of it, but you.. I don't know."
(Y/N) instantly knew they chose the wrong words when they looked back at Hunter. His eyes looked slightly haunted and he looked down at his hands like he did before he fell unconscious earlier. (Y/N) widened their eyes and hurriedly but gently took his hands into their own. They made sure to be firm in case he seemed to get lost again. Hunter looked up sadly, squirming his hands.
"You okay?" (Y/N) asked worriedly.
"Did I..? Did I hurt you..?" He asked, pulling his hands away.
Hunter looked like a kicked puppy just then, it broke their heart. They suddenly came to the realization of why Hunter looked at them like that before. Now they weren't sure if he was pulling away for self-preservation, or if something else was wrong.
"Hey, of course not. Sorry if I made you assume that. You were just having a rough time, okay? I think you were lost in your... thoughts, is all." (Y/N) said carefully.
"Do you promise? I'll never forgive myself if-"
"No, I promise. I just don't want whatever happened to happen again so I'm intentionally being.. choosy with my words."
This made Hunter calm down a bit. But then there was still one unanswered question.
"Is everything alright? Do you not want to be touched right now?" (Y/N) began.
"What happened? I can take it. Please, my head is spinning here." Hunter begged.
(Y/N) paused for a moment before deciding he deserved the truth, even if they thought he couldn't handle it right now. Their question could wait a moment.
"You were doing the dishes. And I was writing on my computer when you suddenly began to hyperventilate.."
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(Y/N's) project was almost wrapped up. Only a couple more pages and they could send it in to the editor. They stroked the keys gracefully before a loud gasp brought them out of "the zone". They looked over to the noise. Hunter having done the dishes, had his back facing towards (Y/N). All they could see was that he was trembling with his head bent down, he was panting.
(Y/N) worriedly furrowed their brows and stood up slowly from the table to walk over to Hunter.
"..Hunter?" They asked.
No response, they were met with his rapid breathing.
"Hey sweetie, what's wrong? What ha-"
They gently turned Hunter around and froze when they saw the gushing slash on his finger. Fuck. (Y/N) rushed to grab the nearest dry, clean towel, pressing down on the cut that extended from his finger to his palm. Hunter was still panting harshly after a moment; they looked up at him now.
"Hey, it's just a little cut. It'll be okay." They said with a warm smile.
Hunter seemed to look past them, his eyes glazed over. With tears? From being in a memory? (Y/N) couldn't tell. They gently raised a hand to his scarred right cheek.
"Hunter? You with me?"
His eyes seemed to focus on them, but also right through them. Like he wasn't actually seeing (Y/N), but someone else. They didn't like that look in his eyes, it gnawed at them from the inside as if they did something horribly wrong. Hunter started to go pale under his sweat-slicked skin. (Y/N)'s worry grew, and practically skyrocketed, upon seeing his eyes roll back into his head and seeing his knees bucle before their eyes.
"Hunter!" (Y/N) cried out.
They managed to catch him, just barely. His body was limp in their arms before guided down to the cold, linoleum floor
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"You were out for a few minutes. I was close to calling an ambulance or something. When you came to, I had no idea what had happened, not exactly. But then you started hyperventilating again, and I realized it was probably just.. a really bad panic attack or something of the sort. You really gave me quite the scare there." (Y/N) finished.
Hunter blinked. Well that would explain why they were being cautious about the subject. He truly hadn't remembered it. Based on what they were saying though..
"I think it was a flashback." Hunter said.
"What?" They asked worriedly.
"That's the only thing that makes sense. You said you've had them before, right? I remember when you told me about them, and your extensive research on them for your peace of mind, and it seems like that." Hunter said.
"Wait.. you don't.. remember?" (Y/N) asked.
"Remember... what?" Hunter asked.
"What was going on in your head? What you were feeling or what I did? None of it?" They asked, voice laced with concern.
"No, not really. I remember.. clearing my plate and going to the sink. The rest is... black. Blank." He said.
(Y/N) frowned. They recalled their own fits like this as a kid. Well, not by their own account of course, but from loved ones. This was long before they knew what was happening in their small little body. Long before they knew they had experienced trauma, and what it did to a person.
"Then that's exactly what that was, Hunter. I only assume from experience." They said.
"I really don't want to remember... what that was." Hunter said.
"And you don't have to, not right now. But someday.. you will have to face those things whether you want to or not. I know that sounds scary, but you'll always have me. Probably your friends too. You won't have to face them alone." (Y/N) clarified.
Hunter was afraid, but he smiled gently at the thought. But then there was the fact that he probably was in his head, alone.
"But.. you aren't in here with me. Yeah you understand but, at the end of the day it's just me in here. You can't.. you can't be there." Hunter said anxiously.
(Y/N) sighed.
"That might be true. We might be trapped alone in our meatsuits, this little thing we call a cranium. But guess what else? That doesn't mean you're really alone. I will always be within reach. Always." They reassured.
He smiled and (Y/N) took his hand gently.
"Promise." They said.
He noticed his skin wasn't as sensitive for a moment, he rejoiced in not feeling like he was being struck by lightning. He looked away for a second but then back to (Y/N), after he realized.. they meant it.
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I haven't written in what seems like months and actually drawing?!. Who is this person and what have they done with Allison ehgetesgfsf

















