#top scenario

[lady-une]

Enough

Hey y’all, so I have been in such a writers block the past few months and I am trying to slowly dig my way out of it. Writing for nyongtory is one of my favorite things to do. So of course I need to work my way back to that so I can get back to Bitter Sweet Destiny. I did NOT abandon that story, I will get back to it! But for now please enjoy this little story. I will make this into three parts but here is the first part. I want to see if y’all are feeling this or not. I’m still rusty with my writing so please just bare with me. Also if you haven’t noticed I am OT5, BigBang will always be 5 in my eyes. I am also still a supporter of Seungri, until they can prove with actual evidence that he is guilty I will stand with him. With all that said please do enjoy and as always love, comment and share. 

With everything that has happened he thought they would still be there for him. What is he supposed to do other then move on when the “Family” he had is no longer there. Enough is enough. It is time for him to be happy.

Theme: Angst

Word: 3073

The dark cold silence was something Seungri was slowly getting use to. Gone were the days of playing around with friends and laughing with his so called brothers and the love of his life. The year leading up to his enlistment was what he thought was his darkest time…he was so wrong. Going into his enlistment after being cleared of the horrendous allegations he thought things would change. That the media would spread the word that he was innocent. They never did. The people who thought he was guilty before still though of him as guilty. They justified their thoughts by saying he paid off the courts and the police to proven his innocence. Seungri couldn’t believe how blind and stubborn people were. The amount of money needed to do such a thing was more money then he would ever have.

Leaving the military he thought his brothers would be there to greet him but they were absent. He understood why they couldn’t send him off because of their schedules and because he was still seen as a negative aspect in societies eye, so it was only natural that they wouldn’t want to be seeing public associating with him. Yet now that time had passed he couldn’t understand why they weren’t there for him. Their schedules were clear and there should have been nothing to stand in their way. After all even with the reports hunting his every move down he still made the time to see each of them after they returned home.

It hurt to not see his three so called brothers, but that hurt didn’t compare to what he was feeling to not even get a welcome home text message from Jiyong. That pain was by far the worst, it was as if someone had stabbed him directly in the heart. But he just assumed Jiyong was busy with something, after all he was the all mighty G-Dragon. The pain only got worse as the time went by without a single message from Jiyong.

The only solace Seungri had found in those days were from his family. They were there to welcome him home with open arms. Glory…the one true friend was there as well. Glory and a very few friends were there to take him out for his first drink and dinner. Glory had organized a small gathering in a private setting for the celebration.

Glory was really the only one who openly supported him this whole time out of his inner circle. Glory was also the only one Seungri allowed to see how hurt he was. He was the one to sit up with him at night as he cried his pain into a glass of wine. Glory allowed him the chance to openly let his emotions show with no judgement.  

For months Glory sat by and waited for the members of BigBang to come back to Seungri. For them to make the smallest movement that would give him hope that things would be fixed. Yet it never came. He watched those so called brothers and lover go on with their life without a single concern for Seungri. He was never mentioned on a single SNS post or in any interview. It was as if they had deleted him from their life.

It was when Seungri started mentioning how he didn’t want to be there anymore and how he was tired of feeling the way he was. Glory knew that he needed to change something before Seungri would do something that could not be undone.

For the following two months Glory did research on the process of immigrating and opening a business. He knew that South Korea was toxic for Seungri and it was time to see him happy again. Glory had been wanting to leave South Korea to start fresh in a new setting, he just couldn’t see him leaving Seungri alone with everything going on. So this was the best option and chance for both of them to be happy, he couldn’t let it pass them by.

With Seungri sitting at the dinning room table Glory placed a plate of food in front him before he sat down across from him. Glory watched Seungri as he moved the food around the plate without putting much in his mouth, something that he was doing more and more these days. He was losing weight again and the dark panda circles were becoming more prominent.

“Hyung I have an idea and I need your help.”

“What did you need? You’re not in trouble are you?” Seungri asked as he set down his utensils.

“No, I’m not in any trouble. Hear me out ok. I think this would be great for both of us.”

“Ok, I’m listening.”

Glory got up and walked to his bag on the floor to retrieve a folder. Returning to the table he handed Seungri a pack of paper before returning to his spot and pulling out his own packet.

“Hyung lets move. I want us to move to LA. We can open up a dance studio and we can expand NHR and work with other Korean DJs in the states. If you look over these pages I have highlighted the price it would cost to start everything. It wouldn’t take much to move there and get the proper legal documents needed for the business. Then if you move to the next page it breaks down the cost of the move and start up. I have included what I have to put towards the cost and what I would need from you. Now I know you don’t have much income coming in but I did look at how much we can get if we were to sell your stocks and how much we would get if we liquidate all of our larger assets. It’s not like we can bring everything with us like your houses and our cars.”

Seungri sat there looking at all the info Glory provided him. The younger man was very thorough with his research. Was this the right thing to do? Could he cut ties with his home? It’s not like there was anything holding him there besides his true family.

“Your family is on board with this. I already talked with your parents and Hanna. They think this is a good thing for you.”

“You already spoke with them?” “Yes because I knew they would be the thing holding you back.”

It was crazy how much the younger man knew about his way of thinking. Seungri always thought there was only one man who knew him like that but clearly he was wrong. It was time for a change.

“Let’s do it.”

“Really?”

“Yes.”

Glory jumped out of his chair and ran to Seungri and threw his arms around him. The two men laughed. The feeling of excitement was something that Seungri had not felt in such a long time.

With his mind made up things moved quickly. Before he knew it they had a rental property picked out. The proper legal documents were being processed and a meeting was set to handle the stocks and shares Seungri owned.

Walking out of his lawyers office Seungri felt a bit of unease. Things were really becoming real. His lawyer had him sign off on documents and promised to find buyers quickly. The amount of money Seungri would be getting would be more then enough to keep him comfortable in the states.

Sitting in the studio with the rest of the members Jiyong was going over lyrics as the other members chatted about a variety show appearance they were going to have tomorrow. Jiyong’s phone lit up with a notification from his attorney. Putting the pen down Jiyong grabbed his phone wondering what was wrong since he didn’t have anything going on that needed his legal representative. Opening an email he was being made aware that a few companies he was interested in had shares available, including a decent amount of shares in YG. Jiyong looked at his phone confused, his brows scrunched together as he thought hard.

“Jiyong what’s wrong?” Youngbae asked from his spot on the couch.

“Just my attorney asking if I wanted buy some shares.”

“For what company?”

Jiyong rattled off the names and number of shares that were listed in the email.

“Weird, those are about the same amount of shares we all hold in the same companies. Remember when we got our first big check we all a bought shares for retirement.”

“You’re right, weird because none of us are selling them right? Who would have thought someone else would have the same amount as us.”

Everyone stopped talking and looked at each other. None of them would sell. They didn’t need to after all…..but there was one person not there.

“He wouldn’t.” Daesung pipped up.

“Why would he?” Seunghyun asked putting his phone down.

“Has anyone talked to him? Why would he?” Youngbae added.

Closing the email Jiyong opened up a web browser and searched Seungri’s name. Nothing much came up besides picture of when he was discharged from the military. Jiyong bit his lip remembering that he had forgotten about it. One small article published a few days ago showed Glory and Seungri leaving a building with the headline “Former member of BIGBANG ready to move on to new endeavors” but didn’t mention what.

“Nothing alarming is coming up so it must not be him. Oh well, I am just going to buy them.”

Jiyong replied to his email giving the green light for the purchase not knowing what he had done.

The next morning Seungri had gotten a phone call verifying that he wanted to sell his shares and he confirmed again that he wanted to. His attorney promised him the funds would be available the following week and that his legal forms were ready to be picked up. With everything set up and ready to go Seungri informed everyone that they could start preparing for the move.

That same day the members of BIGBANG were just leaving the recording of the variety show when they were stopped by reports bombarding them with questions.

“What are your thoughts on Seungri selling his homes and cars?”

“Is Seungri filing for bankruptcy?”

“Do you know why Seungri is liquidating all his assets?”

“Is Seungri in trouble again?”

The members of were thrown off guard by the questions and continued onto the van waiting for them.

“What was that all about?” Seunghyun asked opening a bottle of water.

“OH MY GOSH!” Daesung shouted.

“What’s wrong?” Youngbae asked.

“Seungri! He sold all his houses and his cars!”

“What?” Youngbae asked again.

Daesung handed Youngbae his phone and articles were being published about Seungri selling off his assets but no reason was being provided.

“Is he in trouble again? I haven’t heard much about him. I thought he was laying low these days?” Seunghyun mentioned as he leaned forward to look at the phone.

“Hyung don’t you think we should find out?” Daesung said looking towards the eldest member.

“I think it would only make sense to.” Seunghyun said as he looked towards Jiyong.

Seungri did his best to avoid the reporters who were constantly following him and asking him questions. He would only smile slightly and move on. The Korean media and the public didn’t deserve to know anything anymore. They had turned their backs on him and only wanted to destroy him. All of his houses except for the main one was emptied out and everything he was taking with him was already boxed up and sent out for delivery. Today was the final day to box up the main house….the house that he had shared so many memories with his so called brothers and him. Seungri didn’t even want to mention his name anymore. Gone was the feelings of sadness and loss. He had moved on towards anger. With his family and friends there to help, it was going to take much less time to box everything up. Everything that brought memories of their time together were boxed up to be sent to him. Everything BigBang related was set to be thrown out but Seungri’s mom wanted to hold onto it, so those boxes were being sent to his parents house.

Grabbing a box of pictures Seungri carried it down to the moving truck and passed Glory who offered to carry it for him but Seungri only smiled at the younger man and told him to go help his dad with the other boxes. The day was perfect for moving, the weather was mild and the reporters were nowhere to be seen. Placing the box in the truck Seungri turned around to head back into the house but stopped dead in his tracks seeing them there.

“YA! Were you just going to leave without even saying anything to us?” Youngbae yelled towards the frozen Seungri.

“That’s kind of messed up Seungri. That’s not like you.” Daesung added.

“Even a text message would have been better then no communication.” Seunghyun added.

Seungri just stood there, why were they here? Why now of all the times they could have shown up? Seungri looked at each member with his eyebrow raised with confusion.

“Why are you even here?” Seungri asked finally finding his voice again.

“Because our little brother is leaving without a word.” Youngbae replied.

“Brother?” Seungri spoke softly, as if it was an unknown word to him. “Brother would imply a relationship. A familiar bond between individuals. I don’t know if that is a bond we have. So I don’t think brother would be a word I would use to describe what we are to one another.”

“How could you say that? We have spent years together. We know everything there is about one another.” Daesung shouted as he took a step forward but was stopped by Seunghyun .

“True we have spent years together. I thought we knew everything there was about each other. But that didn’t mean anything.” Seungri said as he crossed his arms over his chest.

“What the hell are you even going on about?” Seunghyun said with a scowl.

“If all those years meant anything to any of you then where were you? Where have you been? Every single time any of you needed someone I was there for you. None of you even were there for me when I was discharged. Even though I was going through hell I was there for every single one of you. Even a text message would have been better then nothing.” Seungri spat back at Seunghyun.

“Don’t take that tone with him Seungri, he is still your elder and deserves respect.” Jiyong said finally speaking up from the sidelines.

“Oh the fearless leader finally speaks. I’m surprised you could find the time to even be here with your busy schedule with all your work and girlfriends.” Seungri let the last word slip out as if it was a knife hoping to slash out at the man who had held his heart for years.

“Is that your problem? Are you pissed because we have all been busy and that I have girlfriends again? God Seungri you are such a child. We have to move forward, if we don’t then BigBang dies. I have had girlfriends in the past many times, you know they are a requirement. Grow the fuck up!” Jiyong spat back, clearly fed up with things.

“I could honestly care less about any of it anymore. For once I am doing things for myself. This has nothing to do with any of you. So just go.” Seungri said as he tried to push past the men blocking his way but was just pushed back to his spot by Youngbae.

“You don’t get to just leave like this, family doesn’t do that!” Youngbae said with his arms extended out blocking his way.

“Family?” Seungri spat the word out as if it tasted like spoiled food. “No fuck that. In fact fuck the Korean media. Fuck Kpop. Fuck BIGBANG. You guys aren’t family. Family doesn’t turn their back. Family doesn’t leave you feeling alone. Family stands by you and supports you. Family fights for you even when the odds are against you. None of you did that. So why should I consider you all family? I thought you guys were my family and I waited for you. But I wont do that anymore, I am leaving everything in the past that is toxic and I am going forward to start fresh. So you can stop pretending you care because your actions speak louder then your empty words.”

The members of BIGBANG were left speechless, never had Seungri spoken with such anger nor has he ever dropped so many cuss words. This wasn’t like him and they didn’t know how to process it. The sound of someone clearing their throat had everyone turning around to find Seungri’s father and an angry Glory standing behind them. Glory moved forward and pushed passed the members as they bowed to Seungri’s father. Placing his box in the truck Glory grabbed Seungri’s hand and pulled him back towards the house.

“I think it is time for you all to leave.” Seungri’s father spoke calmly but with a sense of finality. He was not here to argue with these boys who had hurt his son.

“Abeoji, we need to talk more with him.” Jiyong said trying to move forward.

“Don’t even think about approaching my son again. Don’t address me with such familiarity anymore, my son is no longer connected to you or your kin. Such is your bond with my son broken, so is your bond with my family. Leave now and never return.” Seungri’s father said and turned towards the apartment before nodding to the security team waiting by the door.

The security team moved forward blocking the entry to the home. The members stood there watching the door shut to Seungri’s home.

“Hyung what do we do now?” Daesung asked looking towards Jiyong.

“We leave. There is nothing we can do. If he wants to leave then good riddance.” Jiyong replied as he turned around. He was angry that things had turned out this way. Yet even with the anger coursing through his veins, there was a feeling of pain in his heart and a feeling of uneasiness over what just happened. How did things get to this point?

[noonachronicles]

A Dance with the Devil

Choi Seunghyun/ TOP X Reader

Words: 3.4k

Warnings: Light cursing, mild blasphemy. 

Genre: Fluff?/Humor?/Fantasy?

A/N: This was supposed to be a drabble, but I’ve never been very good at keeping to that word count restriction tbh. Requested by Anon, #24 (24. “I’m sorry? You’re telling me you’re supposed to be the Devil? … Funny, you look nothing like I’d imagined.”) & Tabi. This is the first thing I’ve written in almost a year. So sorry if it’s terrible, but also not sorry because this is the first thing I’ve written in almost a year and I’m over the moon that I was finally able and inspired enough to finish a thing. I genuinely hope y’all enjoy though! 

It was supposed to have been a relatively sunny day. The first day in what felt like weeks that you wouldn’t need to carry around your umbrella along with everything else. However, it seemed that the weather was a fairly fickle bitch.

You’d only been strolling around downtown for a couple hours when you felt the first drips crash down on your head. The dark clouds rolling over the tops of the skyscrapers of the city quickly. As grey gloom filled the sky, it filled your mood as well. Before you could make it to the closest metro entrance the rain was really pouring down. Unprepared, you had to stop, and dipped quickly into the nearest shop. Observing quickly that it was a record shop you smiled, it was probably a store you would have stopped in anyway.

Convenient, you’d thought to yourself. You started to the right. Flipping through the large cardboard packages to find a cover that could catch your eye. Music was playing over the store speakers, a trippy, rock song from the 60’s. The air in the shop smelt like sandalwood and vanilla incense. You hadn’t noticed anyone else in the shop yet, so you assumed the owner must be someone much older.

Still shuffling through old records you imagined him clearly. A salt and pepper head of hair, mostly salt, pulled back into a ponytail that hung down his back. An old Led Zeppelin T-shirt that used to be black, but was now gray. Much like his hair. A pair of old jeans with holes that they’d earned not holes that had been predesigned. You filed the image away and smiled to yourself, hoping you’d be right.

The music playing in the store, in various genres and from various decades, along with the countless records to keep you company kept you from checking the time. You’d had no idea how long you’d been in the shop and had forgotten all about the fact that you’d still yet to see a single other person. You had several records in your arms and were nearly halfway through the store when one of your favorite songs started playing.

There was something about soul songs. It never really mattered where you were or what kind of mood you were in. Your body would just involuntarily start to move. Something barely noticeable at first, just a bop of your head, and then it moved through you. A roll of your shoulders, a pop of your hips. Stevie Wonders’ Superstition was almost halfway over when your realized you were full blown dancing down the middle row of the store. The words of the song falling from your lips. You felt okay about it, there still wasn’t anyone around, so it wasn’t hurting anyone for you to enjoy yourself.

“Very superstitious… nothing more to say...” you sang lightly, as you bopped your way down the aisle and then back, “very superstitious… the devil’s on his way.”

You dropped your bags, from the other stores you’d been at on the ground and began to spin, holding the records you’d grabbed close to your chest, feeling the song. Eventually the song finished, as they often did, with your unabashed dancing finishing with it. You let out a puff of air as you looked down to collect your bags. That’s when the clapping came from somewhere up above. You looked up to see a loft that you had genuinely not noticed at all the entire time you’d been there.

The sight of another human startled you and you jerked back, bumping into the row of records, dropping the ones that had been in your hands. An incredibly handsome man was leaning over the railing, clapping as he smiled down at you. He looked nothing like the old, rocker, record shop owner you’d dreamt up, not in the least. This man, this handsome young man. He was tall, long, lanky. He looked both very big and intimidating, and yet somehow fragile and precious as well. A smirk lingered on his lips, one of his thick, dark eyebrows was perked up in amusement. His eyes were more than you could handle, even from as far away as he was. He was looking at you, of course, but it was more than that. It felt like he was absorbing you completely, so much that you had to look away. Your feet seemed like a more appropriate subject to stare at.

“I’m so sorry.” you said shakily. “I didn’t realize there was anyone else here.”

“You didn’t think there would be some sort of employee...in a store?” he asked, with a clear lightheartedness.

You dared to look back up at him. You weren’t sure of what you’d been hoping for but he was still just as handsome as before. Now his smirk was a full smile and you were melting. “I figured someone would be here. I guess I just forgot about it, since I had been here so long and hadn’t seen you.”

“Well don’t stop on account of me.” he shrugged standing up to his full height, you knew that even if he were standing in front of you, you’d still be looking up at him.

“Excuse me?” you said finally leaning down and grabbing the records you’d dropped.

“Dancing.” he grinned down at you before turning around to do something else. His voice still carried down to you, “Dance harder even. And you could sing louder, there’s no harm in it.”

“I don’t- I’m not going to dance in front of a stranger.” you scoffed. “Now that I know you’re here.”

“Why not?” he asked turning back around, peering over the railing, “Where are you from?”

“Where am I from?” you asked confused.

“That was the question I asked.” he nodded.

You sighed, “I’m...from here.”

“Oh,” he exclaimed,  as if surprised, “I had assumed maybe you came from that little town in Footloose.”

“Hah. Hah.” you said sarcastically as you turned back to the records.

“I’m serious. What’s your favorite song to dance to?” he asked, “No, nevermind. I got it.”

You flipped through two or three more records. The store music had stopped playing and you could hear shuffling up in the loft. Then you sighed, your curiosity becoming too much, and you looked back up.

“Got it!” He exclaimed from somewhere out of view.  

“You broke my heart 'cause I couldn't dance. You didn't even want me around…”  the song by The Contours began and your eyes widened slightly.

The man, whose name you still did not know, popped back into view. A smile that showed just how pleased he was with himself spread across his face. You watched half mortified as he started to shimmy down a set of stairs that lined the wall. He kicked his long legs out in a less than graceful manner, stopped halfway down the stairs to stick his butt out and shake it unceremoniously, and then hopped down several others. You covered your mouth, your laugh, as he continued on. Shaking his hips, throwing his limbs all over the places with little to no coordination.

“What are you doing?” you asked, as he reached the row you were in.

“What you should be doing. Dancing.” he grinned, he twisted his hips with every step he took, getting closer and closer to where you stood.

You shook your head no, “I don’t know what that is, but it’s not dancing.”

Now, standing just in front of you, he plucked the records from your hands and put them on the shelf before grabbing your hands in his.  With too much enthusiasm he made you twist with him to the song, “Anything can be dancing if you believe hard enough.”

So began your casual and strange friendship with Seunghyun. It was relatively more relaxed now. Although he still, and often, made you dance with him in public. You’d gotten used to it. Not comfortable per say, but you knew it was going to happen and that there was no stopping it where he was concerned.

As the months you spent together turned to years, he became much less intimidating than he was that first day. You still thought he was handsome, it was likely that you always would, but he was more than that now. He was kind of a dummy, which was your favorite part, your bingu. He was silly and had this willingness to look like an idiot in front of others that was so uncommon in other people. He just didn’t care what anyone thought about him. You envied it, mostly because you knew that the freedom he got from not caring was what made him so happy.

He also became a great friend to you. Supporting you in every endeavor, talking you through plans and ideas, stoking the fires of all of your passions where others never really seemed to care. Seunghyun also seemed to have a unnatural knack at knowing when a guy you were dating was a piece of garbage. Or you just seemed to have an unnatural knack at only finding men who were garbage and he knew that about you. He talked you out of staying in bad relationships for too long and always seemed to know how a guy would end up disappointing you. He was also the first one, every time, to suggest you get back into the game. Rooting for you, knowing someday you’d find the perfect person.

Sitting across from Seunghyun one afternoon at your favorite cafe, you’d become pretty certain you did find the perfect person. He was sitting leaned back in his chair, one long leg crossed over the other, the Sunday paper unfolded in his hands. You were sure he was single handedly keeping print news alive, the grandpa. Just another thing to love about him really, as you sat with your paperback book open on your lap, unread for the last half hour.

Over the paper you could just see his coiffed hair and the tips of his big ears. On the table sat his half full cup of coffee and a plate with just the top of his muffin. He’d already eaten the rest, he just liked to save the top for last. Your plate was just crumbs by now and your coffee was nearing its end.

“Hey…” you said grabbing his attention. You put your book in the bag at your side.

Seunghyun folded his paper and placed it next to his coffee. He turned his body towards you. Giving you his full focus, as he always did. He smiled, “What’s up?”

“Do you remember the other day,” you paused to take a nervous breath, “we were talking about how I liked this guy. You told me to just get over my fear and ask the guy if he wants to go out sometime?”

“Yeah, of course.” He popped the entire muffin top in his mouth like it was a grape and chewed for a moment. You watched his sharp jaw work as he maneuvered the pastry so it was in one cheek, making him look like half a chipmunk. “Oh! Did you do it?”

You gave a small smile, watching a few crumbs fall from his lips to somewhere in his lap. “Not yet. Um, well, you see… It’s you.”

“Who’s me?” he asked absentmindedly grabbing his coffee mug and taking a gulp to clear his mouth of muffin.

“The guy. The one I like, it’s you. Maybe would you want to go out sometime?”

You watched as he lifted his face to you, watched as his eyebrows went from creased in confusion to raised in understanding. His mouth fell into a sort of ‘o’ shape and then he just stared.

“Ah, yes. My biggest fears realized.” you nodded, trying to ignore the burning embarrassment in your chest.

“No! It’s not…” he sighed uncomfortably, “I really like you. That’s why I spend so much time with you, you’re maybe the only person I do like, on the whole planet.”

“But…” you interrupted.

He tapped his long fingers on the table trying to find the right words to say, “However, there are just some things about me you don’t know, that you wouldn’t like. There are reasons we can’t be together, without you making some major sacrifices. I wouldn’t want you to waste your time on me.”

“Sure, Seunghyun, it’s fine. Whatever. Let’s just pretend this moment never happened.” you said rolling your eyes.

“I’m serious! I -” he paused, his bottom lip tucked under his teeth for a second in genuine contemplation.

He leaned forward and used his stupidly large hand to bekon you closer. Suddenly, you realized, everything about him that had made butterflies flutter in your belly moments earlier, seemed annoying to you now. You leaned forward despite that.

“What?” you said with a little more bite than necessary.

“I’m... the devil. As in Satan.” he leaned back a little to check your reaction.

Your face remained completely stoic as you processed the confession. Then came a small smirk, that grew into a full smile, and then before he knew it you were leaned back in your chair laughing hysterically. You clutched at your chest, desperate for air. Tears streamed freely down your cheeks. Seunghyun sat forward in his chair, elbows on his knees as he watched your reaction intently.

“Ohhh,” you said finally able to gasp in a couple of satisfying breaths, “that was good. That was really good.”

“What?” he asked confused.

“I mean, I’m sorry? You’re telling me you’re supposed to be the devil?...Funny, you look nothing like I imagined.”

“How did you imagine I would look?” he asked, you assumed, still playing along with his bit.

“Hornier. More horny? Having more horns.” you casually, verbally processed your thoughts, “and you’re missing a tail for sure.”

“Haven’t you ever heard the saying devilishly handsome?” he asked framing his perfect face with his hands.

“Sure, but you can’t dance for shit.” you pointed out.

“What- what the hell does that have to do with anything, number one. And number two, yes I can!” he argued.

“There’s that other saying as well, dance with the devil?”

He shook his head looking a little annoyed, “That’s not what that saying means.”

“Oh?” you thought about it for a moment, and chuckled. “Oh!”

“There we go.”

“Well, anyway. I’ve been rejected, not a lot but enough, and that was the most unique excuse by far. So, congratulations on that I guess.”

“It’s not an excuse. I really am Lucifer. The Fallen.” he almost looked genuinely offended, you thought to yourself.

“Yeah, okay.” you said sarcastically, “I believe you.”

“Don’t wink at me!” he whined, “I’ll take you to hell right now!”

“Oh yeah? You’ll take me to hell?” you smirked.

“Yes!”

“You’ll take me right on down and give me a tour? Show me where the magic happens?” you snickered.

Seunghyun stood, frustrated and slammed his palms flat on the table before shouting, “It’s not a joke! I am the devil!”

The entire cafe turned toward your table, save for a guy near the door with his headphones obviously up too high. Seunghyun didn’t even care, he just looked down at you, fuming. His big ears pink at the tops. Not bending at all to his display you grabbed your iced coffee and placed the straw at your lips. You took a long, exaggerated sip and then placed the cup back down, never breaking eye contact.  

“You done, Luci?” you asked calmly.

He sat back down and sighed, “I am the devil.”

“So what if you are?” you asked, his eyes shot up to look at you like you were a mad woman. “The devil wasn’t even that bad. In most cultures he’s not some evil entity, just so you know. And even if you looked at it from religions that do consider him evil it’s because he questioned God, and what’s so wrong with that? Shouldn’t we always question authority? Don’t those in power just want to stay in power? Of course God would make him out to be some asshole, he was coming for his throne.”

Seunghyun smiled lightly at your words as you continued on, “Even if you were the devil, that just means that the devil is actually also very funny, and smart and he’s kind. That would just make him supportive, and passionate. It would mean he’s incredibly handsome, and a horrible dancer. But also the kind of guy that does it anyway because it makes him happy. And shouldn’t we all just do the things that make us happy?”  

With very little warning, Seunghyun stood up and leaned his long body over the small cafe table. He grabbed your face between his two big hands and kissed you, hard. He sucked your lip like he was sucking up your soul and you wanted him to. You lifted your hands to cup his face. His jaw sharp on the palm of your hand, his hair tickling the tips of your fingers. You groaned in disapproval as he pulled away and sat back down. You took several seconds, eyes closed, rubbing your lips together. Giving your spirit time to float back into your body before looking across the table.

“Add kissing to the list of reasons the devil isn’t so bad.” Seunghyun smiled, but the look on his face was still quite serious.

“What if- “ he held up a finger to stop whatever snarky comeback you’d opened your mouth to say. “Just let me finish.”

Placing your thumb and pointer finger together, you zipped your mouth shut. You’d hear him out. He was, after all, very committed to this joke.

“If I was really the devil, would you still be interested in that date?”

“It depends, is the Prince of Darkness looking for something long term or just a hook-up?” you asked.

“I’m being serious.”

“So am I.”

“With you?” he said eyeing you as you sat before him, he smiled again, “Long term. The longest term. Eternity.”

A blush bloomed across your cheeks, he was so cheesy. “Then yes, I would still be interested in that date”.

“Okay.” Seunghyun gave a deep sigh and stood up. He reached his hand out to you, waiting for you to accept.

“Where are we going?” you asked standing up and grabbing your bag before dropping your hand in his.

“I have something to show you.”

You kept pace with his long stride as he walked you to the door of the cafe. With your hand in his, trusting his direction, you looked inside your bag to check for your essentials. Phone, keys, and wallet. Just to be sure before you go too far away from the cafe that you had them. You heard the ding of the bell hanging from the door of the cafe as you dug your free hand in the bag to feel for your wallet. Seunghyun had stopped walking and you stopped by his side, still shuffling through your things until you finally found the wallet. Content that you had all your things you looked up for the first time since leaving the table.

“Unholy shit.” you muttered, your eyes widening at the sight.

Instead of the city street you’d been expecting there was a massive castle made out of what you thought looked like obsidian. Large towers surrounding the castle held orbs of flame in red, orange, blue and white suspended in the air above them. Somehow this place was both everything you had imagined hell would be and nothing at all like it. It wasn’t just all black skies and fire pits. There was a softness to it, it felt like an endless sunset streaked across the sky above you. The temperature was not uncomfortable and the mere fact that you’d had that thought made you laugh to yourself.

Turning around you realized the door to the cafe was gone. In its place was a large stretch of mostly desolate land. Trees with large trunks and long, thin branches, were peppered across the land like the graveyard of a forest, and all that was left was skeletons. Further away you could make out sharp peaked mountains. You turned back to Seunghyun, half expecting him to turn into the red horned caricature he was often portrayed as, but he wasn’t. He was still him. Still handsome in his black, button down covered in red polka dots and his tight black jeans.

“Okay, you’re the devil.” you said, “I believe you.”

“Are you scared?” he asked, “I can bring you back.”

You looked at him for just a second before squeezing his hand that was still holding yours. “I’m not scared, and I don’t want to go back.”

“You want the tour then?” he asked with a shy smile and you nodded enthusiastically, how many people could say they’d had the chance?

As he walked you up a long path to the obsidian castle you asked, genuinely curious, “Why the record store?”

“You don’t know already?” he asked, “I love to dance.”

[mykpopmood]

On Holiday with TOP✌️☀️🌈 Feel free to make a request

[fearofcrowbar]

GTOP

[youxidol]

ＤＡＴＩＮＧ ＧＴＯＰ

★they’ll drive you to the brink of insanity

★or will act as if you’re the most precious gem in the world

★you’re treated like royalty     

★you never go to the same place twice for a date  

★each day they have their ten minutes of silliness

★where they either run around your home

★or jump on you and tickle you

★or where one of them pins you down while the other blows raspberries on your stomach

★no matter which ones

★it’s always filled with laughter 

★your own cheerleaders  

★if you ever feel bad about yourself

★or say something negative about yourself  

★honey you better put that lil peach of yours in a seat  

★and prepare for them to give you a god damn presentation on the following:   

★how kind you are

★how funny you are

★how loving you are

★how much they love you

★how much happiness you bring into their lives

★how you’re the most stunning thing their eyes have ever seen 

★it’s constantly been updated

★they let you wear their clothes

★scrap that

★they entourage you to wear their clothes

★’why would i wear a three grand shirt to lay in bed and watch tv all day?’

★’because you’ll be so cute and cozy’

★when you do wear their clothes

★3428394234 pictures are taken

★’leave me alone!’

★’one more!’

★’you said that thirty pictures ago!’

★’YOU LOOK SO CUTE SHUT UP AND POSE FOR US’

★having the two goofs trying to fit in your lap to cuddle

★they end up pouting

★and curling into your sides

★don’t get jealous when other people talk to you

★only when you do something with the other

★for example

★you and seunghyun were cuddling while jiyong was off doing whatever

★bitch jiyong fucking r a n

★he’d be back at the apartment

★eyeing the two of you

★’what’re you doing?’

★’i’m cuddling my boyfriend’

★’you have two boyfriends’

★’well if he other one didn’t run off at seven am i’d be cuddling my two boyfriends’ 

★he’d strip down and join you

★they go all out on dates

★suits

★fancy place

★’can’t we just go to a movie instead?’

★’YOU NEED THE BEST’

★the only time they won’t go all out on dates

★is when one of you is ill

★then it’s all in pyjamas

★with take out

★and lots of blankets

★you’re inspo for 70% of their songs

★they get really shy about it

★they go squish if you show interest in things that they like

★’tell me about this painting?’

★they’ll just asdhafldskl;

★and completely forget everything they know about art 

nsfw from here

★these two  

★oh boy 

★they’ll pound you until you’re unable to walk 

★or will spend hours making the slowest, most romantic love ever

★there’s no inbetween

★toys 

★lots of toys

★seeing you writhe on the bed

★limbs tied to the posts

★with a toy in you 

★turns them on so much

★they l o v e seeing you in lace

★often bring things home for you to wear

★don’t get attached though

★it’ll probably get ripped

★dirty talk holy shit

★’you sound so pretty when you fuck yourself against a toy’

★’i bet you wish it was us’

★double penetration

★both of them being inside of you at the same time is their fave

★’you’re taking up so well’

★’do you like it when we stretch you like this?’

★’i bet you feel so full’ 

★AFTERCARE KINGSSSSSSS

★’baby, you good?’

★’yeah’

★’jiyongs gone to get food’ 

★one of them helps you clean up and get dressed

★while the other prepares you food

★if you even try moving after

★you’re met with a lecture

★on how you should relax

[big-bang-scenario]

Through the Storm

Summary: Living with your assassin team consisted of inevitable shitstorms of emotions but unbreakable bonds. Angst.

Warning: Ah, swearing? Violence.

Author’s Note: This is just random nonsense… I don’t know if this should become an actual series. I feel like I wouldn’t be able to keep up with it. Loosely inspired by White Night and the thunderstorm occurring outside my window.

An arm pulls you against a chest by your hips, causing you to grimace in irritation. “Bitch, are you doing this on purpose?” you hiss, whipping around to give the boy a smack across the side of his head.

Agent V.I whined in pain, immediately rolling away from you and taking the blanket with him. Out of the other assassins, the younger Seunghyun was the touchiest. And probably the horniest. He would always crawl into your bed at least six nights out of seven to “platonically cuddle.” That’s what you want to believe, anyway. Growing up together, as a family of six, had enabled such intimate events to become the norm.

Too afraid to stay for more beatings, Seunghyun hopped out of your bed to bother someone else. You enjoyed the following silence for a few more minutes before forcing yourself to sit up. Too much rest was a luxury you couldn't afford, even if the heavy storm outside prevented any missions from being completed. The dull pangs clawed at the right side of your stomach, reminding you of why you had scolded V.I in the first place. The little fucker had applied pressure against your stab wound while trying to hug you closer.

You dragged yourself into your bathroom for a quick face wash. Brushing your teeth and brushing your hair were the only attempts at making yourself half-presentable. There wasn't much to show off to each other after witnessing one another taking blood baths in agent wars. However, your five comrades were all natural beauties in unique, bizarre ways, leaving you basking in their dust. At least you were still considered as the prettiest woman in the team. The only woman in the team.

Before you could even take your third step into the living room, the elder Seunghyun pulled you aside and gently laid you flat against the couch. You quietly stared up at his deep eyes without questioning his actions. Everyone knew by now that it was pointless to map out his thoughts. His complicated mind had saved the team from so many mind games that any of you would willingly waltz into lava under his orders.

Agent T.O.P quietly slipped his thumb under the hem of your tank top, slowly sliding the thin fabric up to expose the stab wound you had received the night before. Your impressive layer of muscle had prevented the blade from going too deep. It would heal on its own over time; Jiyong had done an impressive job with the stitchwork. You wordlessly allowed the eldest agent to replace your bandage and didn't dare move until he stood up to put up the supplies.

Will it leave a scar?" a literal angel asked, voice still husky from sleep. Agent D-Lite handed you a mug of herbal tea instead of coffee, taking a seat next to you. Despite the spaciousness of the couch, Daesung had decided to share the same cushion with you. You chose not to answer his considerate question and instead lazily rested your body against his side.

"Of course it will." Agent GD, the leader, had been examining your wound from afar, against the kitchen counter. He didn't leave his spot, since the maknae was using the stove for frying eggs, which you found to be pointless. Even if little Seunghyun fucked up, Jiyong wouldn't have been able to solve anything. His kitchen skills were probably fighting for last place with Maknae's.

Daesung's bottom lip stuck out in a pout as he nuzzled his nose into your hair, his own way of comforting you.

"At least she didn't die."

Choi Seunghyun had returned from putting up the gauze and was found leaning against the counter next to Jiyong with a filled wine glass in his hand. Alcohol was prohibited, but the only way to get caught was by peer report. As if any of you ever would.

His harsh statement caused your insides to churn uncomfortably. It felt like your wound had opened up again to create a stain of guilt on your skin in the form of goosebumps. Memories of the day before replayed in your mind like one of those horror movies that would never leave your childhood memories.

While on one of his missions, Agent Sol had fallen in love. One of the most dreadful mistakes as an assassin: loving a normal civilian. His romantic buildup had been shared with you every single night. You still vividly remembered all the hours Youngbae spent telling you tales of his dates. It was partially your fault for giving him advice from a girlfriend's perspective. You were happy for him. You were overjoyed and ecstatic to hear about your comrade's experiencing romance. You were practically living your own fantasies through his stories without even considering the bloody fate that had been set the moment they met.

Once the agency found out, they sent the BIGBANG team a clear message: either the girl had to die, or the assassin that had the relationship. Yesterday became a complete shitstorm that ended with a knife in your side and a bullet through her heart. BIGBANG had forgotten the unconditional fact: The agency always wins. Your feeble efforts at protecting her from a charging agent caused you to disregard the possibilities of a sniper in range. The events that followed vaguely consisted of your teammates dragging you and Youngbae out of the scene, leaving her lonely body on the cold cement ground. You all were not permitted to retrieve her corpse. Worst of all, a flash flood and thunderstorm warning shot through the rural area in which you had fought. The agency had quickly ushered you all back into the city to wait for further decisions (and punishments).

Youngbae was probably chained up in his room on behalf of Jiyong's efforts of preventing him from rushing out into the storm. You could hear his ragged groans from inside at times when everyone grew quiet. Thunder cracked outside, and the thick layer of dark clouds prevented the sun from beaming down, as if it were knowingly mourning for his loss. Your group's "Taeyang" had lost his light, after all. Because of your immature support. Because of your lacking judgement. It was your fault. Your goddamn fault for fucking everything up. For breaking your family member's heart.

You dug your face into Daesung's chest the moment he turned to wrap an arm around you. Youngbae's lover was probably getting buried under dirty water in the abandoned construction site while you were burying your shameful tears in a live person's chest.

Little Seunghyun had turned the stove off the moment he heard your light sob, and the room echoed with your cries. Daesung buried the rest of his face into your hair as he shed tears for the woman he had only met once. Big Seunghyun downed the entire glass of wine as if to wash away his grief, as if trying to ignore the group's mourning. Jiyong bit down hard on tongue until the bitter taste of copper stung his taste buds. He was punishing himself for not warning his friend in the beginning. Little Seunghyun couldn't bear the thick depression choking his air flow, and joined you and Daesung on the couch. He hugged you from behind and rubbed nonsensical circles around your wound with his thumb. His brows were furrowed in frustration as he distracted himself by touching you.

Your heart tore into pieces when Youngbae's low, weak grunts changed into full yells of sorrow after hearing your cries through the bedroom door. The cracking of a wine glass joined in on the ear-splitting screams. Daesung's nails shakily dug themselves into your arm. Someone bunched the wall in the kitchen. Maknae pressed his chin tightly onto your shoulder, hard enough for you to expect a bruise to appear later.

The chorus of your different methods of mourning was drowned out by the storm's cacophony outside.

~

The thunder had dulled to very light rumbling. Your heavy heart didn't feel any lighter even when you felt a body being lifted off of you. Guessing from the toned abs and body shape, you assumed that the maknae had fallen asleep on top of you. The warmth from under you made you realize that you ended up getting sandwiched in between Daesung and Seunghyun as you three cried yourselves to sleep.

You weakly groaned as you felt yourself being lifted. You instinctively rested your head in the nape of the man's neck out of familiar conditioning. From the mixture of sweat and deodorant sloppily applied, your eyes snapped open after discovering the identity of the BIGBANG member that had rescued you from the uncomfortable sandwich inferno.

"Youngbae?" you croaked, sobering up immediately to examine him out of worry. Jiyong probably undid his restraints after the man had worn himself out. Your comrade gently placed you on the other couch adjacent from the one occupied by Daesung and Seunghyun. From the shadows (quite literally), the elder Seunghyun and Jiyong appeared to take their seats beside you. The moonlight barely illuminated their faces, leaving you unable to read their expressions.

Daesung and Seungri were awake the moment Youngae came to disturb you three, the expected reactions from trained assassins. Youngbae did not take a seat and instead stood at the window, blankly staring out at the city. Following his gaze, your eyes widened to see the Busan streets littered with debris. It was probably worse than you thought; the dim moonlight only revealed vague silhouettes. It was still raining. You realized that what you thought was a thunderstorm was probably even worse than your expectations.

Youngbae's tanned face appeared ghostly pale from the moonbeams. Despite the dark rings under his eyes, you noticed that his eyes were still able to reflect the white light. His eyes shined with a beauty that now felt very lonely. Your heart twisted, but your own eyes were drawn to his. As an assassin from birth, you were never one to desire anything. But whatever Taeyang's ears yearned for, you wanted to feel the same passion. The same frustration.

"We escape. Right now. Through the storm."

You felt Jiyong's hand encase yours, his slim fingers squeezing yours tightly. Even your leader was drawn to such an otherworldly beauty. Youngbae's white night attracted BIGBANG like moths to street lamps.

Your quivering lips shaped into a weak smile. You'd much rather take a shower in the hurricane than continue taking bloodbaths with the innocent. Doing so with your team only made it even more meaningful. You didn't need the agency. You only needed your family.

[eureka-its-zico]

Bad Moon Rising - Chapter One

co-written by @tabi-ears

Scenario: They were raised for only one purpose: to fulfill one man’s desire for ultimate power. What happens when the four of them lose the person who’s kept them chained since infancy? Are they meant to avenge him or start over? Is it possible to be more than what they’ve become? If only the answers were that easy…

A/N: This and 2 other chapters were previously worked on by the both of us. It’s an original idea we came up with one night and decided just to run with it, and is 3rd person based. Finally, it was decided that we would share this with you. Now I do warn you, this story is much darker than anything I’ve previously shared. Please keep an open-mind and have the patience to learn about the characters throughout the progression of the scenario. As always, we thank you for reading! Much love, Jenn & Missy

Genre: Mafia AU

Pairing: Seunghyun x OC, Zico x OC

Disclaimer: Any gifs used are not mine and belong to their rightful owners and are only meant to support the story visually for fun. The following chapters have graphic depictions of violence so please be aware.

It was another assignment.

Something to do in the name of the good, the bad, and maintaining that balance in their madness. No one knew how the four of them came to be. The mystery of whether they were plucked  from the streets or snatched from their mothers breasts was something whispered amongst the unsavory characters that feared them. They carried no records of a name: faceless beings that appeared like the boogeyman out the corner of your eye. The only thing certain was that all four of them held the promise of an unmarked grave. These unnamed figures arriving outside the compound an hour ago.

S’s long body relaxed on the hood of the impala releasing a cloud of toxic smoke into the night air; polluting it with villainous thoughts they considered normal. M turned to look at him. Her gaze roaming over his motionless figure and eyes transfixed on the sky. Between the days that consisted of training and plotting out exit strategies he talked loosely if there was such thing as a heaven. S held onto his theories in his soul that allowed him to daydream about entering its like a viking to the gates of Valhalla. If only to destroy it.

The sound of the trunk slamming home alerted M to L’s presence as she rounded the side of the car, duffel bag in hand, and pulled out a pair of leather gloves to slip over her fingers.

“He come back yet?”

M shook her head before she snapped an instructing finger at S to hand over the cigarette. Her cigarette. His head jerked in her direction with eyes blazing a deadly fury at his interrupted thoughts, but M was unmoved.

“We haven’t seen him come back yet. Well, well speak of the devil- “

It was as if the mention of his presence was enough to summon him. The way Ouija boards promise chances of last minute talks with loved ones, only to send something darker in their place.  

Z made his way out of the cloaking darkness of the desert. The moon highlighting strong features that barely softened with the child-like roundness of his face. His eyes reminiscent of a tigers that felt ominous to the point his sharp jaw line and pouty lips did nothing to help make people feel at ease. He was a stark contrast to the statuesque shape of S on the hood of the car. S’s features striking except for a cleaner cut jawline that reminded many of a Roman statue. God-like with his only charm being the grace he gave those to not have to see death in his eyes before he smothered them with a pillow, and silenced them with a trigger.

 Z’s long legs carried him up the slope until he stood a few centimeters away. His chest barely rising at running five miles back leaving the compound far behind. His duffel now empty and discarded at the front tires of the Impala. All except for the explosive charger held in his hand.

“We ready to do this?”

He seemed bored and, more than likely, was. He’d done his part and the need to finish something he believed to be a trivial task blazed in his eyes. S slid off the hood in a graceful movement of limbs until booted feet puffed a cloud of dust from the ground beneath. His hand reached to pull his Browning Hi-Power from its holster to remove the safety and cock a bullet into place.  

“I’ve been ready. I was just stuck waiting on you.”

S moved to the side of the car neglecting the cold stare the younger man sent him. He leaned in through the window and produced a black suit jacket from inside.

“Oh, I’m sorry would you like to be the one to sneak in and place the explosives? I don’t think you’re smart enough- “

“Boys!” L yelled her irritation readable in her voice and features. She handed M her last knife giving her enough time to finish concealing her own weapons. M’s movements swift as she slid the blade home into the wrist holster she’d secured moments ago. “If you’re done arguing we have work to do.”

“Let’s do it then,” S replied coldly.

He adjusted the collar of his shirt under his jacket and moved forward, expecting the other three to follow at his back. A Viking king leading his men to claim Valhalla.

____________

“How the fuck could you ingrates let this fucking happen!”

All four bodies were kneeling on the floor with hands sprawled out in front of them with their foreheads rested against the cool cement floor.  S in particular remained quiet; his shoulders rigid, as he listened intently to the scolding they deserved. A small river of blood flowing down a jagged line between the four of them from the bullet sized hole that tore through L’s shoulder.

Z’s gaze peaked from the sides of his peripherals to watch her sway against gravity for the fifth time. Her eyelids fluttered open and closed to a rhythmic beat with the obvious war she ragged to stay conscious. The lack of a hand that was previously supporting the wound now leaking at a steady pace. M knew what he was thinking. She always did when it came to how he noticed L, because it was the exact same way she noticed S.  

Her eyes combed up the length of Appa’s body to make sure he wasn’t looking before she reached out to lightly tap Z’s shoulder. His eyes darting over to M just as she shook her head in hopes in their silence he received her message: don’t. Her lips mouthing, “She’ll be okay,” and prayed it was enough to calm her oppa’s nerves.  

“You had one fucking job. ONE! You are supposed to go in undetected! That was the whole fucking point of this goddamn assignment and instead you- “A brutal kick landed on Z’s shoulder sending him flailing back. S’s shoulders noticeably became tenser while he struggled to stay motionless against the urge to protect his dongsaeng. “You fucking idiot! You are supposed to be the smartest, but apparently you are the fucking retard of the group.”

“Appa, I’m sorry- “

“I don’t want to fucking hear it! Because of you L is going to be out of commission and you fucking knew I needed her to make rounds this week. Now what the fuck am I supposed to do?”

The question was rhetorical. No one moved to answer. The only thing the three of them knew was that L was dangerously close to passing out. At the snap of Appa’s fingers two men in lab coats came forward to lift L off the floor. It took everything in Z to not reach out and take L back from them. The worry that housed itself in his gut making him careless.  In the end, Z wasn’t able to fight the twitch his hand gave. Unknowingly, it slid across the floor after the doctor’s and even that small of a movement was enough for Appa to see.  

“What do you think you are doing?”

The factory they called home was large. The width large enough that it would take a dozen men, in a chain with arms outstretched, to reach the other side. Old iron pipes and gunmetal catwalks lined a second floor and only aided in making the cement encased building feel colder. Somehow, within so much space, Appa was able to make those seven words resonate around them. The rage no longer needing to be seen on his face as it suffocated them in fear.

“I just want to make sure she is okay.”

Z knew he sounded weak. The very thought violently rising bile to the back of his throat. L herself would’ve damaged him for his tone alone, but he refused to back down. The choice was already made and, regardless how it ended, he refused to further be a coward and repent.  

Both men knew his words showed weakness, and his hidden meaning exposed. M wanted to move to put herself in front of Appa, to defend Z from the coming blow, but realistically she knew if she did they would all pay the price. The loud crack of the whip resounded off  lifeless walls as Z made no move to block himself or touch the blood leaking freely from his cheek. His face turning violent as it swelled, and heated, until the crimson of his cheeks and liquid matched.  

“You fucking idiot! It is your fuck up that did this to her in the first place. I didn’t make you to be weak, boy. Do I have to send you to isolation? Will that jog your memory of your purpose?”

At the threat of the isolation room everything grew quiet. The tension straining through each of them was the only sound they could hear besides that of their own rushing blood, and L’s dragging feet.  

“Appa.”

Appa’s withered face rested solely on his eldest. His earlier words left frozen in this throat; watching S as he moved to sit up on his knees.  

“If I may, I will take responsibility for him. He is my dongsaeng. Any punishment you wish I shall deliver.”

Appa stood motionless; his tongue rolling around in his mouth as he mulled over S’s offer. Out of all of his children he knew S, his eldest and greatest achievement, would deliver. No matter the cost. His protégé mirroring the same coldness as his own.

Appa made his decision in a second; a sharp nod in agreement while he placed the whip back on the silver tray beside him. His arms crossing behind his back as he took in the remaining three. Eyes watching intently as Z resumed his previous position of bowing at his feet.  

“See to it he gets thirty lashes before the dawn, S. You know what will happen if it is not done.”

“Ye.”

“You are all dismissed.”

The three of them waited for him to exit first before they made a move to get up. The first thing M did was go to Z. Her hand snatching the handkerchief out of S’s jacket pocket to start cleaning at his wound. She’d barely been able to start when Z’s hand gently wrapped around her wrist to stop her. His eyes darkened with guilt as he gave her a childish smile before letting her hand drop to her side.

“I deserve this.”

“It was a mistake.”

“I was in charge of shutting off the alarms. I missed one and L got shot. I accept my punishment: it’s what I deserve.”

“S saying something!”  

M glanced back over her shoulder at him. Her eyes frantically searched his somber expression while he continued to move like nothing was happening. His hand reaching in the inside pocket to produce his lighter. The flame flicked to life moments later sparking the end of his cigarette to glow a perfect cherry red.  

“Go ahead and get some rest,” he commanded. “I’ll be by your room around a quarter to dawn.”

“Ye.”

“S- “M tried to argue but S simply turned to head towards their dorms. A huff of agitated air followed at his back from the woman he’d ignored.

“They’re both like that,” Z mused. “Always leaving before you can get a word in.”

M looked back at her oppa with a wayward smile creasing her lips. She hooked her arm with his and began to walk after S with her partner in tow.  

“Difficult bastards,” she muttered earning her a chuckle from the man beside her.  

_________

It wasn’t until she’d dropped off Z at his dorm, locked in lovesick conversations and regret, that M found her way back to her own. Not in the least bit surprised to find S leaning against the doorframe of his dorm a few doors down. His eyes took in her small frame until his gaze landed on hers. The both of them chained in a silent hell of dancing around what they knew, but couldn’t say.  

“Feelings are dangerous things, M. We have no need for them here.”

“So we’re just supposed to let them wither and die?”

She’d never gotten a response to her question. Just an endlessly growing  list of more that she knew would never be answered. Forever kept silent behind guarded eyes and an even more guarded soul.  

They were magnetic. Dynamic. Passionate. Swallowing each other and the world around them whole. A force to reckon with, hidden behind scorpion tails and bull horns. Two predators, fighting for control within each other. Naturally drawn to one another like magnets on a table.  

Her kindness shocked him because how does one possess that? How did the demons that kept him up at night not get to her? Those demons hushing; becoming dormant once she touched him.  

He believed she was good, even though he dismissed her kindness when the bull was released and her once pure demeanor was filled with rage that could cause hurricanes and topple mountains. Normalcy would swim through his veins because he realized that they were the same. His heart would beat steadily in knowing he wasn’t alone. Their eyes helplessly watching each other’s movements. Pupils dilating, eyelids flickering. Never straying too far.  

They were both so hard. And yet, she was softer. And he admired that. Even when she was covered in bruises and blood leaked from her knuckles she never managed to hate the world. But that purity in which he loved could just so easily slip away once that switch flipped. Taking the lives of others is a guilty task to those who weren’t like him. It took a toll on pure hearts. So he guarded her. He guarded her heart and mind so she wouldn’t end up in the dark like him. One that doesn’t allow you to feel. He wanted to feel what she felt but feared it even more. He loved her. In the most psychotic, possessive way. But she did too. And maybe that was her flaw. That despite his darkness she needed him. 

Natural born Alpha’s who clawed at society’s expectations and norms. Pissing on their enemies and welcoming those who were close to their heart. He had demons, and so did she. They ate away at their brains like maggots on a corpse. Only finding relief in each other, for which they’d kill. 

_________

She couldn’t remember her family anymore, just that she supposed she had one. There were too many countless nights she’d been lulled to sleep by the soft sound of a woman’s voice reading her bedtime stories. It’d been a memory that ate away at her when she’d first arrived there. Now it haunted her every so often when she tried to find solace in cold sheets and a dirty pillow. Until, finally, the memories of a life before this hell was nothing but a six-year-old’s imagination.  

It was a deadly thing to try and get used too. The first time she’d met the others, there’d been two other children that’d been dropped at the feet of Appa. Three of them that slowly dwindled down to just one with the others never earning the privilege to receive a name. M was sure she actually had a real name before she’d been brought there, but for the life of her she couldn’t remember. Her first interaction with L a vivid one. M had made the mistake of thinking another little, but older, girl would be her friend. Someone to lean on and give her comfort. She’d clutched to L as she asked  if she could recall her name, only to be silenced by cold eyes, a busted lip, and instructions to never ask again.  

M could recall the terror she felt the second time Appa made his grand appearance. His words harsh and spitting like hot coals as he informed her and the other children the main rule in his house: You fight or you die. Dread so pure corroded in her veins until her nerves felt fried. The fear seizing hold of her bones and spotting her vision in black stars. Her child’s mind unable to understand before Appa called for S to enter the room. Even at a young age S was impressive. His eyes dark and endless, resembling oblivion, as he glanced over the three of them.  

He’d been Appa’s first child. His golden son who, at twelve years old, was merciless and never questioned an order. He’d been instructed to assist in their training and to show no mercy and to weed out the weak. L only being asked to help him when it was required. Soon, three children dwindled down to be only her. When she thought too long about it, M could remember the sickening sound of the boy, who’d been the same age, cracking in two. The way the body fell like a heavy lump to the dirty stone floor, and the lifeless expression on S’s face as he looked at the small child he’d killed.  

Kill or be killed.  

This was her reality now and there was no room for weakness. M didn’t want to die; she didn’t want to be weak. In the beginning all she could remember was how much she hated him. How her small body shook when he entered a room and cause her chopsticks to fall from between her fingers. How swollen black eyes struggled to scan for his presence in hallways and kitchen. The only reason she felt a semblance of safety was because of  Z.

He’d had a tall  frame even then, but lithe. He’d taken care of her when she’d been too exhausted to get back up after a brutal day of training. Her small body rolled into a fetal position until he picked her up and carried her to bed. When he feed her when her arms were too bruised to move. Later bringing warm water to help ease her muscles and to soak blooded hands.  

M knew her resolve was the only thing that kept her alive besides the kindness of a boy who showed it in secret when he wouldn’t be in danger of getting caught. For the longest, M felt nothing but fear in her heart when she looked over at her oppa and unnie. The both of them always discussing things in private; conversations M felt grown-ups were meant to have. She watched fights between the pair with mystified eyes that someone could ever be close to taking S down. No matter how close L got, however, she never succeeded.  

“They’re not that bad, you know.”

Z offered up one bitter night in a weak attempt to ease her broken soul. It’d been a vicious day of training. Her lack of coordination costing her a beating with a bamboo stick by L at Appa’s request. The older man demanding that she hit hard and harder to the point M thought L would kill her. The punishment brought on by her inability to open up a switchblade. She wasn’t able to keep her hands from shaking causing the blade to tumble to the floor. The flashback enough to make her hands curl in the edges of her pillow in hopes it was enough to smother out the possibility of keeping that shame forever.

“How can you say that? They’re so…mean.”

Mean didn’t feel like an adequate word to be used to describe the two. M wanted to find worse, but her seven-year-old brain couldn’t find one. She only knew that she was starting to hate them.  

Z carefully placed a warm washcloth on her exposed back. It forced a small cry of pain from M’s lips that she silenced against the pillow.  The action left Z to stare down at her with pity, and his hands to fidget in his lap as he struggled to find the right words to comfort her. He knew this routine. He’d been through it himself, and he would’ve lied if he didn’t omit that when the three kids came, he’d been glad. Glad someone else got to suffer with him when it came to his hyung.  

“It’s hard to explain. They’re only like that because of Appa. He has a lot of expectations.”

“What does he want? I just want to go home.”

“This is your home now and, if you want to live, you better start realizing that.”

The arrival of a third voice left them both startled. M’s head whipped up from her pillow while Z already   stood to drop down at the edge of the bed and bow repeatedly in apology. The shadow of L’s figure in the doorway held the same imposing threat as S’s. She was only ten but, with her arms crossed and making her entrance, M could’ve sworn she was colossal.  

“Why are you in here?”

“I…noona…I just came t-t-to- “

“You know Appa will have you whipped if he catches you stuttering,” she interrupted. “You promised him you were working on it.”

“Yes, noona,” Z replied back. Another bowing fit hitting him reminding M of a toy on a spring.

“No one wants you here! Go away!”

M didn’t regret the fire in her small voice. She didn’t want to see L or S’s stupid faces ever again but, unfortunately for her, L didn’t seem to care. If anything it only brought her attention back to her.  

“I came in here to tell you that I decided to help you.”

The information wasn’t what she’d expected and M felt the surprise widen her eyes. Her mouth grown slack as she asked meekly, “Why?”

“I like you. You have courage. But you have to get better, if you don’t, Appa will get rid of you.”

M didn’t need to ask what she meant by, “Get rid of.” She’d seen how Appa handed over guns to S and directed him to shoot kneeling men asking for second chances. How S pulled the trigger like he was just stepping on a bug or killing a rodent that entered a home.  

The following weeks were spent with L teaching her the easiest way to do things. Taking the time with M to run around obstacle courses she’d created just to work on her agility and speed. Showing her the most effective moves that blocked blows and to think quickly on your feet by searching for makeshift weapons. More often than not M would end up catching a blow that sent her spiraling down to the floor. L always there with an extended hand to pick her up and push her forward.  

When it came time for her next sparring session with S she’d noticeably gotten better: landing a surprising hit that actually sparked shock in his  eyes and a piercing shout of joy from Appa. M allowed her happiness at landing her first blow to overtake her, and it made her blind. Not realizing that spark of surprise she’d caused turned deadly. She didn’t get a chance to correct her error. One minute, she was victorious, and the next M was knocked on her back, her lungs screaming for air, and S’s fist raised back strike down at her face.  

Before he could land the hit, L was there spinning him around, and earning the punch meant for her. The hit landing solid against her nose causing L to stagger back and fall to her knees. A steady flow of blood seeping between her fingers as she held her hand protectively over her face.

“That’s enough!”

At Appa’s words everyone grew still. Their bodies waiting like toy soldiers for him to direct them into action. M couldn’t remember much except the proud smack on her back she’d received from him. She knew somewhere in there he instructed someone to take L to the infirmary to have her nose looked at. That Z was watching her be led away by men in black suits.

After that day M felt like she’d earned S’s respect in some way, but it didn’t stop the brutality of his training sessions. Time continued to age them, and yet, it didn’t change the fact S remained untouchable. It wasn’t until her sixteenth birthday when L surprised her with a cupcake with a tiny candle that she felt brave enough to ask questions.  

“How long has S been here?”

M didn’t think she would receive an answer. The look of mirth on L’s face slowly ebbed away until she turned to look out at the atrium in the center of their industrial home. The only  bit of green they saw unless instructed to go out to run an “errand” for Appa. It seemed like she would never answer. Until she did.

“He was the first one here,” L spoke softly. “They say he’s Appa’s real son, because he’s been here since he was a baby.”

“And you?”

“What about me?”

M’s innocent question seemed to spark a brutal storm. L’s face hardening to the point M couldn’t stand to keep her gaze locked with a dead woman’s eyes. So she shrugged in an attempt to play innocent and looked out over the atrium. She needed that moment to get rid of the look her sister still had that sent shivers down her spine. In her mind, M believed that what they were was a family. Past things like meeting an acquaintance or friend. Simple words too light when you were bonded over a lifetime of blood and broken bones.

“I don’t mean to upset you, unnie. It’s just no one ever talks about it.”

“Your curiosity is going to cost you one day.” L let out a heavy sigh before taking a long pull from her cigarette. “You and Z, both.”

At the mention of the younger oppa M’s  lips quirked up remembering the last time her and Z shared their usual late night talks in her room. How the boy never realized he’d been rambling on and on about L. Both of them stuck at home while their elders were off doing something Appa wouldn’t allow them to join in just yet.

“You’ve got to earn your place.”  

M could vividly recollect the sound of L’s struggle to carry in a half unconscious S. The smell of wet grass and copper spilling into the conjoining rooms and above. L’s soft grunts the bread crumbs M and Z needed to find the two of them perched in the center of the main building. S’s chest exposed with L pressing large gauze against his stomach that blossomed red. There was no doubt in her mind that they’d been talking in hushed tones. At first, M wasn’t able to tell what about until she ignored Z’s urgent hand gestures to return to the safety of their dark corner and cautiously move further down the stairs.

“…you were careless…”

“What do you want from me?”

“How about to pay goddamn attention next time?”

“You’re forgetting who’s in charge here.”

Even from a distance S’s low timber rattled her bones and M felt the urge to bow to his authority. To apologize for L’s careless words, but to M’s amazement, L didn’t budge.. Instead, she met his cold eyes with her own. Her hands completely stopping from bandaging up the wound to reach out and take hold of his face.

“Hyung, we’ve been through much, you and I. You’re the one that taught me feelings are useless; they’re dangerous. Do you mean to tell me you suddenly no longer believe that?”

M never got to hear his reply because Z’s sudden sneeze alerted the two of them they weren’t alone. Their eyes actively scanning the outer rooms of darkness that the two youngest used to cloak themselves until they were back to the safety of their dorms. Ever since that night, M felt her curiosity grow to the point she couldn’t contain it any longer.  

“I was two, I think.” L spoke through a cloud of smoke. Her eyes squinting as she stubbed out her cigarette.  

M nodded her head trying to hide the small smile of victory she felt at getting her unnie to answer. It was always like pulling teeth to get S or L to do anything, really.  

“Z told me he came here when he was six. Like me.”

“That’s true. Maybe that’s why you’re both a pain in the ass.”

“We’re close. Like you and S hyung.” M’s curiosity ignited again and she was unable to stop herself as she eyed L. “Have you and S ever…”

L looked confused until realization flew her doe eyes wide and disgust scrunched up her nose.

“Oh god no. What makes you ask that?”

“I don’t know. I mean you’ve both been here the longest so- “

“Let me impart some wisdom with you that S has shared with me, M: Feelings have no place in what we do. They’re a danger to people like us.”

“But you love me.”

It was amazing how much L could remind her of S sometimes. How L’s once light exterior could become so callous and reserved in the literal blink of an eye. M watched as it happened then, as L’s hand moved to scoop up her cigarettes and she stood to leave her.

“I don’t love you. Your family, M and we take care of our own.”

_________

“Try again. Try harder.”

As the months and years passed, M was allowed to go out on more assignments, but with more assignments came more training. With that training came time spent with S and she wondered how she could go from absolutely loathing someone to wanting to understand them. The boy he’d been had grown into an even deadlier man. The deadliest, and cruelest thing, M felt since her teenage years was how handsome the cosmos had made him.  

She always assumed it’s what was part of his charm; what made it so easy for both he and L to gain access to parties meant for only the beautiful and the rich. What made her believe that maybe the two of them were closer than everyone thought. Beautiful people flock together, didn’t they?  

Even into adulthood M felt a little awkward. The only confidence she found was in her ability to wield blades of any make and style. How easily she could make the steel become an extension of her body and slice through the air with an accuracy that few could ever hope to possess. The greatest gift she’d received was on her 21st birthday. A katana greeting her when she’d walked into her room. All the bullshit forgotten as the duffel slipped free from her hands and her feet sprinting to her gift. Her palms cradled it with care as her fingers danced over the woven horsetail braids that laced around the handle. The sound of the blade being removed from the sheath slicing through the quiet of the room until the steel glinted in the rough fluorescent light.  

M thought it must have been from Appa; who else could afford such a gift? But the sound of feet shuffling at her door, the person that stood there, instantly made her think otherwise. S leaned against the frame with his arms tucked securely against his chest. He watched her with interest, his gaze skimming over the blade in her hands.  

“You like it?”

“I love it.”

He grunted out, “Good,” before turning on his heel to retreat from her dorm. M’s head now filled with more questions than answers. It wasn’t until their next sparring session that M started to realize just what was going on.  

He’d knocked her off her footing with a hard elbow to the face giving barely any time to right herself before he advanced.  

“Try again. Try harder.”

M swung out blindly, a distraction that he easily took, and used her distraction to her advantage. Her knee coming up to land a solid hit in his kidney. The opposite leg moving up to hit the other side while she anchored herself. M  followed up the blows with an elbow to the back of his neck. It caused him to hunch over just enough for her to continue landing blows onto his back. Even M knew it was a weak shot; her arms unable to reach anything vital at his sides. It didn’t take S long to recover. It never did.

Before she could prepare herself for his attack he’d had his arms around her waist, lifted her off the floor, and slammed her down hard on the padded mat of the gym floor. Her legs struggled to find good placement to aid her in gaining the upper hand in their game of dominance. The two of them moving in a death roll with neither of them able to stay on top for long. Finally, as it always happened, S bested her and M found him on top with her arms pinned above her head. She wasn’t sure if it was just the heat of the moment or the added rush of adrenaline that caused her to be so brave. Whether it was bravery or foolishness M was never quite sure, but she held no regrets when she leaned forward and kissed him. It didn’t feel foolish when he kissed her back. In that moment all M could feel was his hand moving to cup her face and a tongue tracing across her lips and exploring what she was willing to give.

Just as fast as it started it had ended. He was off of her in a flash and bolting for the door leaving her behind to watch his retreat. The only person she could tell was Z, because she was more than sure S was probably off telling L. The two of them going over their mantra of, “Love has no place here; feelings get you killed,” until it turned them blue in the face.

It’d been months since that incident, but S’s lips left a stain on her own that she couldn’t shake. His already guarded exterior turned impenetrable around her. The only time she’d been able to read him when he watched over her on their shared assignments: he defended her when she never asked.

_________

The smoke of his cigarette lingered around him creating a mask that hid him partially from view. He hadn’t moved from his position against the doorframe and he wouldn’t enter his dorm until she was safely inside. The both of them staring through a void that shared in their unsaid words and frustrations. The conversation they’d shared months ago replaying like a broken record.

“It isn’t foolish to love someone.”

“I can’t love you, M. Beauty has no place around a man who only knows how to destroy it.”

At the time M wanted nothing more than to argue with him. To somehow believe anything she could say would be enough to convince him that he was capable of being more. The cold reality, however, was that their life was breed for chaos. How could they ever believe they were capable of more than that.

[seoulthirsty]