[Edit] I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU COMBINED THREE OF MY FAVORITE AUS INTO ONE FIC, BLESS YOU
No but really this was great and I’d love to read more of it, I find the idea super interesting, like sirens are such a common and wellknown threat that lifeguards are hired specifically for their ability to resist them, super cool!
Sorry it took me a little while to respond to this, I enjoyed it so much I wanted to draw a lil smth for it
There was a time of the evening when it was easiest to strike. Sock had gotten it down to a science. When it got darker and cooler, the crowd on the beach thinned, and so too did the number of lifeguards. Three, two, and then just one, standing watch over the tourists still milling about on the sand and splashing around in the shallows. One life guard, however watchful, couldn’t keep track of everything at once, and there were blind spots to be exploited if you knew where they were.
Needless to say, Sock did.
He peeked up over the edge of the rocks, past the danger, no surfing beyond this point sign and towards the beach itself. His adversary for the night was perched up in the lifeguard nest, the thing that was too big for Sock to agree to call it a chair, and Sock couldn’t get a good look at them through the white wood. He wondered which one it was. The cute one? The one that liked to shout? The one with an excess of body hair and a thing for speedos?
Doesn’t really matter, Sock thought, and turned his attention to the shallows. He let himself start to hum, low in the back of his throat, as he looked over his options.
The closest human to him was a middle-aged woman in a floral swimsuit. She was badly sunburned, and Sock immediately linked it with tourist. True, she could just be a local that was bad about sunscreen, but Sock didn’t think so. He’d gotten pretty good at guessing.
He snuck another glance at the lifeguards nest. Still couldn’t make out the human on duty, but that was okay. As long as he kept it subtle, he should be fine. He started to hum louder, then croon, building up in volume slowly. He wanted to be just loud enough that the woman could hear him, just quiet enough that nobody else got hooked. One person edging closer to the rocks was subtle, six or seven was a dead giveaway.
He kicked it up another notch, feeling his song vibrate in his throat and– there! The woman’s gaze went softer, and she was looking around like she was searching for something. Sock let go of the rock he was leaning against, slipping back into the shadows behind it. Now that he had her, all he had to do was keep singing and she’d follow the sound.
Water lapped around his shoulders. Holding a note like this above water was hard, but if he broke the sound she might snap out of her trance and realize what she was doing. No, he had to keep at it as she splashed closer, even as the air crackled dry over his gills.
The woman appeared around the edge of the rocks. She looked lost. Sock flicked his tail once, gently, gliding a few feet further behind the rocks, and he upped his pitch. So close, just a few more feet…
Pain exploded through Sock’s skull. He jerked under the water instinctively, hands flying up to cover his face. Something white-hot prickled behind his eyes.
His back hit the sandy bottom. He barely felt it. After a few moments he managed to open his eyes, and a few moments after that he’d finally cleared the last of the black spots from his vision. The pain had somewhat receded, localizing in his nose. That must’ve been where he was hit.
That meant one thing only.
With a quiet curse, Sock pushed off the bottom, resurfacing a few yards out from the rocks. Sure enough, the floral woman was no longer in the water, and was instead standing on the rocks Sock had been hiding behind being consoled by a lifeguard.
Oh goddamnit.
It was the cute one.
Sock sank lower into the water until just his eyes were above the surface, watching as mister blue-eyes himself patted the woman awkwardly on the arm. He had his rescue tube gripped in one hand– probably what he’d hit Sock with. Stupid rescue tube. Stupid life guard training that told them where to hit.
Stupid cute humans.
Sock would love to drown him. He’d love to drown any of the life guards, honestly. It would be a personal victory for him. Unfortunately, humans had wised up about safety practices, and there were only ever two kinds of life guards anymore– deaf, or one of those rare strains of human who were immune to siren song.
If I could just get him alone fifty feet from shore, Sock thought, and slunk back under the water with a bubbling huff.
Blue-eyes didn’t go back to his nest after that, instead standing dead center in the beach and glaring out into the water like it had personally offended him. Sock supposed that look was probably meant for him. Good. If he couldn’t interact with blue-eyes one-on-one, he’d settle for pissing him off from a distance. He was cute when he was angry.
Maybe next time he intervened while Sock was trying to snag someone, Sock could talk to him? Get a back-and-forth set up or swap banter or something. He wouldn’t mind getting chased away from his prey if he got to talk to blue-eyes while it was happening. It was just that he was always too disoriented to make good on that idea when he’d been smacked solidly in the face.
Sock rubbed his still-smarting nose, sending little twinges of heat up through his cheeks. Ugh. He’d retreated to the other side of the beach, heaving himself up onto a rock that held a tiny tidepool. He could see blue-eyes from here, but hopefully blue-eyes couldn’t see him. If he could, well. Sock hoped he could get some words out before he got whacked in the nose again.
“You make my dad really super angry,” a voice behind him said. Sock twitched, hands jumping and tail lashing hard enough to send a spray of water against the rocks beside him. He was slower to turn on land then he was in the water, but when he did look behind him, he didn’t see what he expected to.
She must’ve come down from the cliff. There was a path that wound up the side of the sheer rock, weathered steps carved into the cliff face that climbed down until reaching the boulders that cropped out of the water. There was no other way this kid– a six-year-old?– could possibly have snuck up on him.
She grinned at him, baring those strange flat human teeth. She was missing two. Her dress, a cheerful bright green, ended just above her knees, and her legs were dotted with equally bright bandaids. She was standing well outside of his reach.
She laughed.
“I scared you, didn’t I!” she said, and it wasn’t a question. Sock felt heat surge through his cheeks.
“No you didn’t!” he snapped, folding his arms.
“Did too!”
“Did not!”
It kept going like that for a while. Humans mostly kept their kids away from him, so he didn’t know if this kind of repetitive argument was normal, but where Sock usually outlasted everyone under Meph’s rule this kid gave him a workout. When he started getting tired of repeating himself, she looked like she was still having as much fun as the first time.
Sock broke off with a groan. The groan turned to a hum, but before he could get any further again the little girl spoke.
“Oh, that doesn’t work on me. My dad says its a im-mun-ity.” She pronounced the word carefully, like it might break at any second. Sock grumbled quietly. Out of reach and immune to song. Someone had taught this kid the works.
“Your dad sounds smart,” he said, instead of swearing like he wanted to. The girl nodded seven times.
“Yep! He taught me all about merfolks, and he told me to stay away from you. Never said I couldn’t talk to you though! Why do you drown people?”
The question caught Sock off-guard. It had snuck in there in the same tone as everything else the kid was saying, only registering a full few seconds after she’d finished speaking. The bluntness of children. There was nothing quite like it.
“Because it’s fun,” Sock replied. The girl shook her head. Seven, eight, nine… she was really enthusiastic about her gestures.
“No it’s not! It’s mean.”
“It’s fun for me.”
“Then you’re mean!” She stuck her tongue out at him and folded her arms. She said it with such a so there air to it that Sock couldn’t help but snort.
“Alright, I give. You’re adorable. What’s your name?” Sock asked. The girl stopped sticking out her tongue.
“My name’s Ellie! What’s yours?”
Hm, two routes to go here. Best to go the easiest one.
“Humans can’t pronounce my full name, so you can call me Sock!” He anticipated, and was gratified by, the giggle he received in return. He grinned. “Yeah, I know. It’s a silly name.”
“I like it!” Ellie announced, and Sock’s grin widened.
“I like it too.”
Ellie bounced in place a couple times, looking from him to the water to the shore and back to him again. She seemed seconds away from some huge explosion of energy. “I gotta go,” she told him, “I just came down to get my dad. Stop drowning people!”
“I won’t,” Sock said, still grinning, and Ellie blew a raspberry at him as she ran off along the rocks, up towards the beach. Sock watched her go. It was nice to talk to a human that wasn’t terrified of him. Why weren’t all humans like that?
Ellie had turned into a bright green streak along the dark sand, a child projectile with a set collision course. Sock wondered who her dad was, then abruptly stopped wondering.
Ellie had run headlong into blue-eyes, wrapping her arms around his waist and nearly bowling him over. She moved animatedly, no doubt telling blue-eyes what had just happened. No doubt telling her father what had just happened.
Blue-eyes looked over in his direction. Sock felt his heart stop. He wondered if it was too late to dive back into the water.
Then he raised his hand and sent them both a cheerful wave.
Hey can we not make @vampirequeenoffan into a meme? Yall are taking a single joke post WAY to far by memeing it and its honestly kind of mean? Youre just openly mocking her but you dont even know why. Its just "funny" to reblog jokes and memes but this one it just feels like bullying? Either way you spin it, its pretty shit. Either you dont know why youre reblogging it other than just to mock her or you have seen the original post but by trying to react to what she said, now shes going to get a load of unwanted attention, criticism, and fighting. She doesnt deserve this? She made a post and yall have just decided to mock it, not for its content, but because you can. Its mean. Its kinda bullying. Youre going to run this poor girl off this website for no goddamn reason other than "idk i thought it was funny" Thats really shitty
hewwo I am a gremlin and am only just now answering these asks but thank you so much!!!!!! for the cookies and the friendship and the meme appreciation -w-
In animation classes we’d spend a whole lot of time just looking at specific bits of scenes; one of my teachers has one scene in Frozen he’s shown us several times because he hates it, Why, you ask? It’s animated “too well.” He says “Everyone else moves like an animated character, but the animator who got this scene CLEARLY tried too hard because for this one moment Kristoff stops moving like a character and starts moving like a real person.” Anyway yes I rewatch movie scenes over and over too
imagine getting dragged in front of an entire class because some guy hates you for trying too hard
