Today marks the fourteenth month of our relationship or in the other words, it has been a year and two months since we got together.
It’s been so long since the last time I wrote a letter for you, I’m glad I didn’t forget how to do it. We have been through a lot, literally a lot. And on the most part, it’s all coming from me. I deeply apologise for making you feel worthless, which I think that’s stupid, especially when you said you’re not good enough.
Because you are the opposite of all the bad things you’ve told me.
You are amazing. Nothing can describe how much I’m in love with you, Eve.
If it was someone else, they would have given up on me since a long time ago, but you didn’t. If I pushed them away, they would be gone immediately. But now you’re still here with me. And the worst is, if i lost a grip and told them to leave, they would go without hesitation, but you didn’t go. And honestly I can’t picture myself with someone else.
I used to think that you’re very conceited when you said no one would love me more than you do, but I realised that your words are true. I’ve received so much love from you. I’m very thankful for that. I won’t let go of the hands I’m holding now. I won’t let anyone else to have you because you are all mine.
Remember when I said that love tends to change someone, I guess that’s also true. I wasn’t someone romantic who wrote letters for his girlfriend, I wasn’t someone who took his lover out on a date. I was also not someone who would fight for his relationship when everything got hard, maybe I am still that someone but at the very least, I’m trying to push away my ego and be back to normal when my mind begins to go crazy.
I’m not promising you an ‘always happy relationship’, things will be hard at times, both for me or for you. But I will always be here, no matter what. I’ll keep trying to be better, for us.
I promise you forever, this is so real that I am deeply in love with you. This might sound crazy to say it, but I really love you. Not only the characters you’re role playing as, but I’m in love with someone behind the mask. Someone who talks to me everyday, someone who gets cranky when I reply slow, someone who spends most of her precious time in these past fourteen months to be with me. I couldn’t care less on how you would feel about me after telling you this, but I really do love you.
When I say I love you more, I don’t mean that I love you more than you love me. I mean I love you more than the bad days ahead of us, I love you more than any fight we will ever have. I love you more than the distance between us, I love you more than any obstacle that could try and come between us. I love you in my very own way. Like a stone loves the mosses around it, like a sea loves the pebbes in it, like a coincidence. I love you the most.
Taking you as the way you are, with all the bruises, scars and broken parts all around you and your heart. I want you, all of you. Your flaws, your mistakes, your imperfections. Even though sometimes I lose against my mind, against my ego. But I still want you, and only you.
Thank you for not giving up on us, for not giving up on me.
Thank you for all the efforts you’ve put to keep our relationship on its track.
Thank you for staying by my side even after such a torturing phase.
I love you more than you could ever imagine, it’s like the air that can’t be measured.
Once again, happy one year and two months.
I love you, and I will always do.
